Funny Stories from the Roman Army
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Date: 2023-08-10
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6: 15 - What interesting to note is just how badly Caesar was screwed by Avienus. Caesar was in an absolutely terrible position during that time. Just before the African Campaign, one of Caesar's legions mutinied, but came back into the fold following a heartfelt speech by Caesar. After this, Caesar had to start rushing and get to Africa ASAP with whatever legions were nearby. The rest would have to catch up. But, because they set off so quickly, they didn't bring much food with them. Caesar marched inland to try to get some food and supplies by raiding towns and villages. But, the entire Pompeian army had come to say hi, along with a bunch of Numidian Cavalry. The Caesarians had gotten their asses handed to them, but they managed to escape. After this, the Caesarians had to stick to the coast in a defensive formation. The only thing stopping them from starving to death was finding a nearby town's hidden food stockpile. Months passed like this. Two extra legions then arrived. Caesar's army was now about as big as Scipio/Labeinus' army. But Scipio/Labeinus had King Juba's 4 additional legions worth of cavalry.
Enter Avienus.
Caesar must've been so angry, after everything he's been through. He could've fitted half a legion on that ship, or brought a bunch of food or supplies to stop the Caesarians from starving, or to build up their camp/fortifications. Maybe it was because Avienus was a military tribune, and a dishonorable discharge was punishment enough. Avienus would never be able to hold any kind of political office. Either way, it's far better than what Scipio did to a group of captured Caesarians during the African Campaign. Scipio asked the centurion from the captured Caesarians if they'd be willing to fight for him. The centurion gave a very flowery speech basically saying no. Scipio was so mad he ordered the centurion executed on the spot, and ordered the rest of the captured Caesarian soldiers to be tortured to death. Damn. I know who's side I'd be on.
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6: 15 - What interesting to note is just how badly Caesar was screwed by Avienus. Caesar was in an absolutely terrible position during that time. Just before the African Campaign, one of Caesar's legions mutinied, but came back into the fold following a heartfelt speech by Caesar. After this, Caesar had to start rushing and get to Africa ASAP with whatever legions were nearby. The rest would have to catch up. But, because they set off so quickly, they didn't bring much food with them. Caesar marched inland to try to get some food and supplies by raiding towns and villages. But, the entire Pompeian army had come to say hi, along with a bunch of Numidian Cavalry. The Caesarians had gotten their asses handed to them, but they managed to escape. After this, the Caesarians had to stick to the coast in a defensive formation. The only thing stopping them from starving to death was finding a nearby town's hidden food stockpile. Months passed like this. Two extra legions then arrived. Caesar's army was now about as big as Scipio/Labeinus' army. But Scipio/Labeinus had King Juba's 4 additional legions worth of cavalry.
Enter Avienus.
Caesar must've been so angry, after everything he's been through. He could've fitted half a legion on that ship, or brought a bunch of food or supplies to stop the Caesarians from starving, or to build up their camp/fortifications. Maybe it was because Avienus was a military tribune, and a dishonorable discharge was punishment enough. Avienus would never be able to hold any kind of political office. Either way, it's far better than what Scipio did to a group of captured Caesarians during the African Campaign. Scipio asked the centurion from the captured Caesarians if they'd be willing to fight for him. The centurion gave a very flowery speech basically saying no. Scipio was so mad he ordered the centurion executed on the spot, and ordered the rest of the captured Caesarian soldiers to be tortured to death. Damn. I know who's side I'd be on.
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Gioco
i've got to say that you are describing the gold pile situation pretty wrong. In fact what you have to imagine is a lot of soldiers running to the pile and stay at the border trying to take what they could, as soon as all the borders of the pile have been occupied the next soldier arriving while try to sneak in to be in the front row eventually pushing other people aside. Now imagine many many rows behind the first, everyone trying to push and sneak in for some gold and you can easly figure out how people ended up dieng burnt. Things like this are still happening today and i have seen it with my own eyes, for example while i was living in shanghai 150 people died on the 1st january trying to catch fake money (club flyers) thrown from the terrace of the club. They died smashed and trampled by people in the row behind who wanted to take money too. just there where no monay at all only paper.
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i've got to say that you are describing the gold pile situation pretty wrong. In fact what you have to imagine is a lot of soldiers running to the pile and stay at the border trying to take what they could, as soon as all the borders of the pile have been occupied the next soldier arriving while try to sneak in to be in the front row eventually pushing other people aside. Now imagine many many rows behind the first, everyone trying to push and sneak in for some gold and you can easly figure out how people ended up dieng burnt. Things like this are still happening today and i have seen it with my own eyes, for example while i was living in shanghai 150 people died on the 1st january trying to catch fake money (club flyers) thrown from the terrace of the club. They died smashed and trampled by people in the row behind who wanted to take money too. just there where no monay at all only paper.
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youngthinker1
When I hung out with soldiers in camps and what not, and grew bored, I ended up building useless things from trash.
So, over the course of a long eight hour look busy session, I built a crude chair, crude cover, and a crude roof out of the nearby sticks, and trees in the training area. No one else, but I used it, as they thought it looked crude. However, to the best of my knowledge, it still stands. For at the end of training, I heard the instructors argue about whether to leave it as is, or destroy it with explosives. Since I saw not a whiff of explosives outside of training grenade, I'm pretty sure it still there, in the woods of Washington State, with each new group of trainees gasping in horror at who created that thing.
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When I hung out with soldiers in camps and what not, and grew bored, I ended up building useless things from trash.
So, over the course of a long eight hour look busy session, I built a crude chair, crude cover, and a crude roof out of the nearby sticks, and trees in the training area. No one else, but I used it, as they thought it looked crude. However, to the best of my knowledge, it still stands. For at the end of training, I heard the instructors argue about whether to leave it as is, or destroy it with explosives. Since I saw not a whiff of explosives outside of training grenade, I'm pretty sure it still there, in the woods of Washington State, with each new group of trainees gasping in horror at who created that thing.
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Christopher
#1 He probably figured that they needed to work out some disobedience. This way they were doing less damage then sacking a city. And there was no enemy nearby/he could use the time to plan.
#2 Oh, so _that_ is why so many people in MMO stand in the fire? They are have those guys as ancestors!
#3 Catching the mule before the King might have been a figure of Speech in Rome for a while
#4 Dishonorable Discharge. Oh, that stings. Remember that Caesar basically ended the 10th Legions Mutiny simply by calling them _citizens_ instead of soldiers. And it might even have ruined any political ambition he or his family had for generations.
#5 Legionaries, what is your Profession? Soldiers. But we do dabble in Poetry.
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#1 He probably figured that they needed to work out some disobedience. This way they were doing less damage then sacking a city. And there was no enemy nearby/he could use the time to plan.
#2 Oh, so _that_ is why so many people in MMO stand in the fire? They are have those guys as ancestors!
#3 Catching the mule before the King might have been a figure of Speech in Rome for a while
#4 Dishonorable Discharge. Oh, that stings. Remember that Caesar basically ended the 10th Legions Mutiny simply by calling them _citizens_ instead of soldiers. And it might even have ruined any political ambition he or his family had for generations.
#5 Legionaries, what is your Profession? Soldiers. But we do dabble in Poetry.
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valentin
you will be amazed but nothing has changed since ancient times.
After 1990 in my country tranches alongside roads had to be dug. Stories about pots with gold coins being found during digging in certain places acted like a charm on populus and you should see the willingness of the people to dig trances and the fervour they kept digging.
In the UK you should see the simple minded people being more than happy to work in grueling conditions on demolition sites to the thought that they may be as lucky as others who found treasures during the demolition in other places. It is priceless how easy pray the people are to stories.
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you will be amazed but nothing has changed since ancient times.
After 1990 in my country tranches alongside roads had to be dug. Stories about pots with gold coins being found during digging in certain places acted like a charm on populus and you should see the willingness of the people to dig trances and the fervour they kept digging.
In the UK you should see the simple minded people being more than happy to work in grueling conditions on demolition sites to the thought that they may be as lucky as others who found treasures during the demolition in other places. It is priceless how easy pray the people are to stories.
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Kruppt808
that sound what the Romans did at Tetuorborg Forest Battle, they buried some of their gold and treasure when they knew things were going bad. They made it easy to find so the Germans on their heels would waste time searching everywhere in hopes for more. Arminius had to shame his fellow countrymen to get them moving by saying the Romans were tricking them.
Maybe the Marian forces did the same, hey lets bury some gold right where the other Pompian forces will be landing, it will make the troops go insane for gold.
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that sound what the Romans did at Tetuorborg Forest Battle, they buried some of their gold and treasure when they knew things were going bad. They made it easy to find so the Germans on their heels would waste time searching everywhere in hopes for more. Arminius had to shame his fellow countrymen to get them moving by saying the Romans were tricking them.
Maybe the Marian forces did the same, hey lets bury some gold right where the other Pompian forces will be landing, it will make the troops go insane for gold.
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angbandsbane
One of my favorite chuckle-worthy stories I read in a book where even the author couldn't resist a jab at a less-creative legionnaire.
Basically, we have the sling stones from when Octavian besieged Antony's wife and brother, Fulvia and Lucius, in Perusia. Octavian's soldiers would carve threats into the stones before sending over the wall, such as Fulvia, I'm coming for your ct, Lucius' anus will belong to me and (to quote the book somewhat less intimidatingly) Lucius is bald.
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One of my favorite chuckle-worthy stories I read in a book where even the author couldn't resist a jab at a less-creative legionnaire.
Basically, we have the sling stones from when Octavian besieged Antony's wife and brother, Fulvia and Lucius, in Perusia. Octavian's soldiers would carve threats into the stones before sending over the wall, such as Fulvia, I'm coming for your ct, Lucius' anus will belong to me and (to quote the book somewhat less intimidatingly) Lucius is bald.
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kpballa1009
9: 28 - What man always wants and goes after - success, women, power, riches. King Solomon had them all. He was a king, wise, had 700 wives (1 Kings 11: 3, all the riches and peace in his kingdom (1 Kings 10. But at the end of his life what does he say? it's all vanity, chasing after the wind. and. Ecclesiastes 12: 1 - Remember now your Creator (God) in the days of your youth, before the difficult days come, and the years draw near when you say, I have no pleasure in them
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9: 28 - What man always wants and goes after - success, women, power, riches. King Solomon had them all. He was a king, wise, had 700 wives (1 Kings 11: 3, all the riches and peace in his kingdom (1 Kings 10. But at the end of his life what does he say? it's all vanity, chasing after the wind. and. Ecclesiastes 12: 1 - Remember now your Creator (God) in the days of your youth, before the difficult days come, and the years draw near when you say, I have no pleasure in them
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Bdleo
They have plundered the world, stripping naked the land in their hunger they are driven by greed, if their enemy be rich; by ambition, if poor Neither East nor West can sate their appetite. They are the only people on earth to covet wealth and poverty with equal craving. They plunder, they butcher, they ravish, and call it by the lying name of 'empire'. And when in their wake nothing remains but a desert, they call that 'peace'.
Tacitus
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They have plundered the world, stripping naked the land in their hunger they are driven by greed, if their enemy be rich; by ambition, if poor Neither East nor West can sate their appetite. They are the only people on earth to covet wealth and poverty with equal craving. They plunder, they butcher, they ravish, and call it by the lying name of 'empire'. And when in their wake nothing remains but a desert, they call that 'peace'.
Tacitus
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Lord
I am more pro-Egypt than pro-Rome, but I'm trying to not dislike Rome too much. at least Julius, Pompey, and Mark Antony allied with Egypt, so I guess the only Roman I truly hate is Octavian. though I suppose if Octavian had allied with Egypt which would've made Mark go to war with Egypt, then it would be the other way around.
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I am more pro-Egypt than pro-Rome, but I'm trying to not dislike Rome too much. at least Julius, Pompey, and Mark Antony allied with Egypt, so I guess the only Roman I truly hate is Octavian. though I suppose if Octavian had allied with Egypt which would've made Mark go to war with Egypt, then it would be the other way around.
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Thijs
Pompey accepted the fact that his Legionairy's where working out for DAYS and got HarderBetterFasterRomaner where ready to go into battle right after that.
If I where Pompey I would not only not punish them. I'd demand the same effort in the next battle and personally hand out 10 sestercies per Legionairy if they won.
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Pompey accepted the fact that his Legionairy's where working out for DAYS and got HarderBetterFasterRomaner where ready to go into battle right after that.
If I where Pompey I would not only not punish them. I'd demand the same effort in the next battle and personally hand out 10 sestercies per Legionairy if they won.
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Vryus
That poem reminds me of Full Metal Jacket, in spirit that is: I wanted to see exotic Vietnam. the crown jewel of Southeast Asia. I wanted to meet interesting and stimulating people of an ancient culture. and kill them. I wanted to be the first kid on my block to get a confirmed kill!
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That poem reminds me of Full Metal Jacket, in spirit that is: I wanted to see exotic Vietnam. the crown jewel of Southeast Asia. I wanted to meet interesting and stimulating people of an ancient culture. and kill them. I wanted to be the first kid on my block to get a confirmed kill!
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Richard
Decimate means to destroy one tenth. If you decimate a city, you destroyed one tenth of it. If you have say, ten comrades, and you decimated them, you killed one guy. The word decimated has been used to imply total destruction, when it actually means one tenth destruction.
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Decimate means to destroy one tenth. If you decimate a city, you destroyed one tenth of it. If you have say, ten comrades, and you decimated them, you killed one guy. The word decimated has been used to imply total destruction, when it actually means one tenth destruction.
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Richard
Decimate means to destroy one tenth. If you decimate a city, you destroyed one tenth of it. If you have say, ten comrades, and you decimated them, you killed one guy. The word decimated has been used to imply total destruction, when it actually means one tenth destruction.
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Decimate means to destroy one tenth. If you decimate a city, you destroyed one tenth of it. If you have say, ten comrades, and you decimated them, you killed one guy. The word decimated has been used to imply total destruction, when it actually means one tenth destruction.
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HereToSeeForMyself
Will you please spell the name of the city in southern Hispania that burned its valuables before counter attacking? Amazing the lengths the soldiers went to to get some silver and gold! Id love to read about it in further detail.
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Will you please spell the name of the city in southern Hispania that burned its valuables before counter attacking? Amazing the lengths the soldiers went to to get some silver and gold! Id love to read about it in further detail.
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Adrea
I'm definitely marching under the banner of more anecdotes! These little snippets of history never fail to amuse me. They really need more of these in school, along with the bare facts - we'd probably get a lot more historians out of it.
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I'm definitely marching under the banner of more anecdotes! These little snippets of history never fail to amuse me. They really need more of these in school, along with the bare facts - we'd probably get a lot more historians out of it.
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Lars
(Romans soldiers digging and sweating) Pompey: (laughing) _He he, guys, do you find anything interesting? _
Soldiers: _Oh shut up you stupi. Erh, he he, sorry, is it you, general? Erh well ain't it a a beautyful weather today? _
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(Romans soldiers digging and sweating) Pompey: (laughing) _He he, guys, do you find anything interesting? _
Soldiers: _Oh shut up you stupi. Erh, he he, sorry, is it you, general? Erh well ain't it a a beautyful weather today? _
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Matthew
Too bad nobody taught Mr. Chief Centurion how to become a great artist as well so that we could have visual depictions of these naked nymphs. Never struck me till now how gay Roman statues really were.
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Too bad nobody taught Mr. Chief Centurion how to become a great artist as well so that we could have visual depictions of these naked nymphs. Never struck me till now how gay Roman statues really were.
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Kregorov
5: 55 they stop pursuing for a golden ass. I can dig it.
9: 45 Nymph there is not used as a reference to mythological creatures. Nymphs in that context would be females between 12 and 17.
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5: 55 they stop pursuing for a golden ass. I can dig it.
9: 45 Nymph there is not used as a reference to mythological creatures. Nymphs in that context would be females between 12 and 17.
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