10 Signs Your Parents Are Manipulative
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Date: 2023-08-20
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Comments and reviews: 25
cupcake
It's honestly sad how my mom tries to gaslight me and guilt trip me into doing what she wants. She's even been using the you would really choose ___ over your mom? I'm sitting in what feels like a prison of a house, just waiting to escape. I still have at least 8 years to move out and i absolutely hate my life rn. My mom is the kind of toxic where she's nice for a bit and then all of a sudden she's mean and she's gaslighting me. When this happens, it makes this situation even worse because when she's nice i feel like i have to forgive her even though she's being toxic so i just feel bad if i don't. I keep running back to the cause of all this just because she's shows a little love every now and then. It's even worse because it's not just me. All of my siblings have had this happen to bc them too. She badmouths us behind our back and always complains about us. The worst part is we can't even do anything about it. So we basically just have to let her emotionally abuse us because of it. One more thing, I just realized that my mom is really toxic because i feel more comfortable telling this to a bunch of strangers than telling my parents. Every time i tried to tell her about my feelings, she just says she loves me and she understands and just comes up with a simple solution when she doesn't even understand how i feel. I genuinely hope all of you guys are alright and that you can get through this. What a world we live in.
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It's honestly sad how my mom tries to gaslight me and guilt trip me into doing what she wants. She's even been using the you would really choose ___ over your mom? I'm sitting in what feels like a prison of a house, just waiting to escape. I still have at least 8 years to move out and i absolutely hate my life rn. My mom is the kind of toxic where she's nice for a bit and then all of a sudden she's mean and she's gaslighting me. When this happens, it makes this situation even worse because when she's nice i feel like i have to forgive her even though she's being toxic so i just feel bad if i don't. I keep running back to the cause of all this just because she's shows a little love every now and then. It's even worse because it's not just me. All of my siblings have had this happen to bc them too. She badmouths us behind our back and always complains about us. The worst part is we can't even do anything about it. So we basically just have to let her emotionally abuse us because of it. One more thing, I just realized that my mom is really toxic because i feel more comfortable telling this to a bunch of strangers than telling my parents. Every time i tried to tell her about my feelings, she just says she loves me and she understands and just comes up with a simple solution when she doesn't even understand how i feel. I genuinely hope all of you guys are alright and that you can get through this. What a world we live in.
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Viktor
Well, if it is in Bulgaria that I've grown up in, if you are seeking outside help, they will tell on you to your parents so that you can stop bothering them, because, no one wants to be their problem. Alternatively, they can really mess things up, or send you to an orphanage - that is where the horror is with all the beatings and rapings. I have watched an interview with someone that grew up in an orphanage, and he said that he learned to shit himself, in order to avoid being raped. The role of the authorities was non-existent at best. And parents abuse children, and well, if they are alcoholics, they don't remember what they have done, so they smile and move on to get shitfaced and abuse their child again, every day, or sometimes twice a day. I have grown that way - not with heavy beating, but with every other possible abuse. You might think I am a trol or something because of the nature of my comment, but I am not. What got me triggered was you saying that children should seek outside help - in my experience, that only made things so, so much worse. Although things have changed, and I really hope that children can get adequate help these days
And again, imagine this - psychologists are inadequate and hate to be bothered and parents are alcoholics and they can honestly say that they are great parents, because they simply don't remember being cruel.
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Well, if it is in Bulgaria that I've grown up in, if you are seeking outside help, they will tell on you to your parents so that you can stop bothering them, because, no one wants to be their problem. Alternatively, they can really mess things up, or send you to an orphanage - that is where the horror is with all the beatings and rapings. I have watched an interview with someone that grew up in an orphanage, and he said that he learned to shit himself, in order to avoid being raped. The role of the authorities was non-existent at best. And parents abuse children, and well, if they are alcoholics, they don't remember what they have done, so they smile and move on to get shitfaced and abuse their child again, every day, or sometimes twice a day. I have grown that way - not with heavy beating, but with every other possible abuse. You might think I am a trol or something because of the nature of my comment, but I am not. What got me triggered was you saying that children should seek outside help - in my experience, that only made things so, so much worse. Although things have changed, and I really hope that children can get adequate help these days
And again, imagine this - psychologists are inadequate and hate to be bothered and parents are alcoholics and they can honestly say that they are great parents, because they simply don't remember being cruel.
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Grace
My mom raises her voice at me and my younger sister constantly. She also likes to turn things around on us, make us seem like we are to root of all her problems and then apologize after acting like it never happened. I really want to believe her and that shell stop but she always finds something to blame it on. Stress from work. Trying to make everyone happy. Trying to teach us not to be rude. These are examples of something she used after raising her voice at us because I said to her bf You look tired, maybe u should go get some rest because I was generally concerned but then he texted her afterwards saying we wanted him to go, which wasnt true, and she kept raising her voice on how she had to do damage control all because we said her bf looked tired. Hope this made sense. Im not sure if this is verbal abuse or if Im just a bad kid. Idk, maybe she thought I wanted him to go cause we didnt like him or something. Ig its in the past anyways.
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My mom raises her voice at me and my younger sister constantly. She also likes to turn things around on us, make us seem like we are to root of all her problems and then apologize after acting like it never happened. I really want to believe her and that shell stop but she always finds something to blame it on. Stress from work. Trying to make everyone happy. Trying to teach us not to be rude. These are examples of something she used after raising her voice at us because I said to her bf You look tired, maybe u should go get some rest because I was generally concerned but then he texted her afterwards saying we wanted him to go, which wasnt true, and she kept raising her voice on how she had to do damage control all because we said her bf looked tired. Hope this made sense. Im not sure if this is verbal abuse or if Im just a bad kid. Idk, maybe she thought I wanted him to go cause we didnt like him or something. Ig its in the past anyways.
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Syryeiah
I have had those kinds of situations before, but the one that pretty much gets me the most is the 7. They use you as a trophy instead of a human being. I have a manipulative family members who were that way, too. They were pretty pushy when it comes to me. My grandma told me this phrase before saying I just wanted what's best for you. To me, I felt that this phrase was just an excuse just to pressure you into doing something that you don't want to do, because your parents wanted you to follow their dreams by making you become something that they wanted you to be, instead of letting you make the decision yourself, and let you be what you want to be. When I heard them saying that phrase, it doesn't sound like they really wanted you to be something that you want to be, because they're controlling you, by telling you that you can't do this or you can't do that kind of thing.
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I have had those kinds of situations before, but the one that pretty much gets me the most is the 7. They use you as a trophy instead of a human being. I have a manipulative family members who were that way, too. They were pretty pushy when it comes to me. My grandma told me this phrase before saying I just wanted what's best for you. To me, I felt that this phrase was just an excuse just to pressure you into doing something that you don't want to do, because your parents wanted you to follow their dreams by making you become something that they wanted you to be, instead of letting you make the decision yourself, and let you be what you want to be. When I heard them saying that phrase, it doesn't sound like they really wanted you to be something that you want to be, because they're controlling you, by telling you that you can't do this or you can't do that kind of thing.
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Devon
I recently tried to tell my mom how something she did made me feel and it turned into a whole fight when I was just trying to have a conversation about how her actions and words made me feel and some how Im making things up apparently and Im unappreciative of her help and she holds the fact that she helps me financially over my head and threatens to take that way whenever we get into any form of an argument and then she starts to send me screen shits of shrinks telling me i need to get help. I do have a shrink I just dont share the details with her because it turns into why dont u talk to your shrink about it. I guess my feelings are invalid. I was not an easy kid to deal with Ill give her that much but as an adult I think Im finally catching on to just how toxic and codependent our relationship is
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I recently tried to tell my mom how something she did made me feel and it turned into a whole fight when I was just trying to have a conversation about how her actions and words made me feel and some how Im making things up apparently and Im unappreciative of her help and she holds the fact that she helps me financially over my head and threatens to take that way whenever we get into any form of an argument and then she starts to send me screen shits of shrinks telling me i need to get help. I do have a shrink I just dont share the details with her because it turns into why dont u talk to your shrink about it. I guess my feelings are invalid. I was not an easy kid to deal with Ill give her that much but as an adult I think Im finally catching on to just how toxic and codependent our relationship is
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Lachlan
Basically my parents are lovely people I get on very well with them but I like to smoke weed now and again and whenever they see Im stoned they take a hole different personality they dont even look at me one day recently the day after they saw I was stoned my car keys bank card and 2 motorbike keys gone Im not getting them back until I stop smoking weed even tho I have no interest quitting they make it out as if Im an addict but I only have it once every 2 weeks if that I would thats pretty normal even if weed is a bad thing I dont see it that way as long as I regulate my usage Im 24 not and they are still babying me about Im away to move out next month and say Im not ready your going down a dark path and stuff like that its irritating but looking forward to having my own plac
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Basically my parents are lovely people I get on very well with them but I like to smoke weed now and again and whenever they see Im stoned they take a hole different personality they dont even look at me one day recently the day after they saw I was stoned my car keys bank card and 2 motorbike keys gone Im not getting them back until I stop smoking weed even tho I have no interest quitting they make it out as if Im an addict but I only have it once every 2 weeks if that I would thats pretty normal even if weed is a bad thing I dont see it that way as long as I regulate my usage Im 24 not and they are still babying me about Im away to move out next month and say Im not ready your going down a dark path and stuff like that its irritating but looking forward to having my own plac
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The
My parents are toxic to each other which has showed me that being myself more feminine is not normal and relationships are not healthy which is why when I watched Disney or something I would be confused that people were happy together and my dad is really bipolar and I want them to be there at like a award ceremony only my mom will show up my dad has never been to a school event even if he said he would be and my mom would tell me it's wrong for me to think he is toxic and what I want for my life like be a historian but they want me to be like a politician or someone who is more important it's really hard when are living situation is hard
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My parents are toxic to each other which has showed me that being myself more feminine is not normal and relationships are not healthy which is why when I watched Disney or something I would be confused that people were happy together and my dad is really bipolar and I want them to be there at like a award ceremony only my mom will show up my dad has never been to a school event even if he said he would be and my mom would tell me it's wrong for me to think he is toxic and what I want for my life like be a historian but they want me to be like a politician or someone who is more important it's really hard when are living situation is hard
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Leyon
My parents (usually my mum) seems like they're gaslighting me, by saying you must've heard me wrong and (in arguments) stop talking back, I don't like your attitude! also, I was once given no screen time except for homework for 2 whole months as a punishment for procrastinating when I should've been doing homework, which cut into one of my school holidays. I didn't obey them since that was just too much to handle, especially in high school, but I feel like they don't realise what they're doing isn't helping me to be disciplined, and that they're just teaching me how to be deceptive and a good liar.
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My parents (usually my mum) seems like they're gaslighting me, by saying you must've heard me wrong and (in arguments) stop talking back, I don't like your attitude! also, I was once given no screen time except for homework for 2 whole months as a punishment for procrastinating when I should've been doing homework, which cut into one of my school holidays. I didn't obey them since that was just too much to handle, especially in high school, but I feel like they don't realise what they're doing isn't helping me to be disciplined, and that they're just teaching me how to be deceptive and a good liar.
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Ethan
Now try having a father like mine, who is very intelligent, who gaslights/verbally abuses/plays victim/never acknowledges my feelings. It is literally impossible to argue with him because by some voodoo magic its always turned on me, either my problems pale in comparison, Im the one causing tye issue, or I'm being disrespectful by standing up for myself. And when I tell him something like [Bad thing he did that hurt me] he magically doesn't remember the incident. I have in fact only noticed him apologies for something he did when he did it In front of someone else.
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Now try having a father like mine, who is very intelligent, who gaslights/verbally abuses/plays victim/never acknowledges my feelings. It is literally impossible to argue with him because by some voodoo magic its always turned on me, either my problems pale in comparison, Im the one causing tye issue, or I'm being disrespectful by standing up for myself. And when I tell him something like [Bad thing he did that hurt me] he magically doesn't remember the incident. I have in fact only noticed him apologies for something he did when he did it In front of someone else.
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Antonio
IF your parents keep telling you that you OWE your life to them. THEN clearly they did not raise you as their child. at best they raised you as a PET or at minimum a FARM ANIMAL or PLANT. NO good parent will ever hang the IOU instead of an ILU over your head your entire life. ever. Just think about why we keep Pets, Farm Animals or Plants. these living things actually owe their life tot hose who raised IT. Otherwise, these living things would be dead or made dead and their existence is for an exchange for something of ultimate benefit to those who raised them up.
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IF your parents keep telling you that you OWE your life to them. THEN clearly they did not raise you as their child. at best they raised you as a PET or at minimum a FARM ANIMAL or PLANT. NO good parent will ever hang the IOU instead of an ILU over your head your entire life. ever. Just think about why we keep Pets, Farm Animals or Plants. these living things actually owe their life tot hose who raised IT. Otherwise, these living things would be dead or made dead and their existence is for an exchange for something of ultimate benefit to those who raised them up.
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Preston
Dealing with parents like this is mentally and physically draining. I have barely anyone else to turn to, as my biological mom always finds a way to play the victim & make me out to be her abuser. These parents will lie to DHS/DCFS, your significant others, family, etc to conceal what theyre doing behind closed doors. My biological mother will raise her fist to me, smirk at me, degrade me, throw things at me and more. Then when I reach out to ANYONE that can help, somehow she finds out and lies to them to make sure I look like the villain.
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Dealing with parents like this is mentally and physically draining. I have barely anyone else to turn to, as my biological mom always finds a way to play the victim & make me out to be her abuser. These parents will lie to DHS/DCFS, your significant others, family, etc to conceal what theyre doing behind closed doors. My biological mother will raise her fist to me, smirk at me, degrade me, throw things at me and more. Then when I reach out to ANYONE that can help, somehow she finds out and lies to them to make sure I look like the villain.
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Kemel
My mother after finding out all the stuff and all my messages on the internet, she started ruining my life. She ended my friendship, she blames me at my friends on the internet or even her friends, acts like a spoiled kid, and she even turned me into a person that shares everything, until I ruin someone's life. I am having an imagination about her where it makes me cry or I can't just get rid of it. I'm never gonna be fixed. As I'm not really that old and I'm almost reaching to 13, I still wonder how my mother will react when I turn 18.
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My mother after finding out all the stuff and all my messages on the internet, she started ruining my life. She ended my friendship, she blames me at my friends on the internet or even her friends, acts like a spoiled kid, and she even turned me into a person that shares everything, until I ruin someone's life. I am having an imagination about her where it makes me cry or I can't just get rid of it. I'm never gonna be fixed. As I'm not really that old and I'm almost reaching to 13, I still wonder how my mother will react when I turn 18.
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Love
My parents are open minded people who give me choices and give me the freedom to choose but if i dont choose the one they wanted they'll talk trash and downgrade the decision i choose to make me feel guilty of my decision then choose theirs, making me second guess almost every decision, recently i decided i wanted to live for myself and my life dosen't fully revolve around making my parent's wish come true, i hope im not being selfish, after that my parents supported me ( their kind people but just dont know how their words affect me )
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My parents are open minded people who give me choices and give me the freedom to choose but if i dont choose the one they wanted they'll talk trash and downgrade the decision i choose to make me feel guilty of my decision then choose theirs, making me second guess almost every decision, recently i decided i wanted to live for myself and my life dosen't fully revolve around making my parent's wish come true, i hope im not being selfish, after that my parents supported me ( their kind people but just dont know how their words affect me )
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Nate
A few years ago me and my family tried to help a homeless person and my parents didnt even know this but when my parents were in town and I stayed home I was mentally and emotionally abused I was told things like you dont deserve to be with your family you dont need friends and also I was told I needed to be trapped in a mental institution and I would be much better off alone after all this happened I finally exposed all the stress I had gone through and whenever I see this person I just run away and dont let her talk to me
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A few years ago me and my family tried to help a homeless person and my parents didnt even know this but when my parents were in town and I stayed home I was mentally and emotionally abused I was told things like you dont deserve to be with your family you dont need friends and also I was told I needed to be trapped in a mental institution and I would be much better off alone after all this happened I finally exposed all the stress I had gone through and whenever I see this person I just run away and dont let her talk to me
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Lifelikedanny
I think my mom is manipulative and its destroying my relationship with my GF. My GF thought I was a mamas boy and her family thought too. I never wanted to be that or feel like that but whenever I dont give her attention im a bad son and I do a lot to support her. My Gf says my moms wants me to act like im her husband but I feel like I was brainwashed this whole time. My mom is dominican I dont know if anyone else feels the same way. But im in a constant battle with myself not knowing if im wrong or if im right.
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I think my mom is manipulative and its destroying my relationship with my GF. My GF thought I was a mamas boy and her family thought too. I never wanted to be that or feel like that but whenever I dont give her attention im a bad son and I do a lot to support her. My Gf says my moms wants me to act like im her husband but I feel like I was brainwashed this whole time. My mom is dominican I dont know if anyone else feels the same way. But im in a constant battle with myself not knowing if im wrong or if im right.
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jastri77
I have 7 things that my mom and dad do in the vid. Tho. I don't wanna fight back. Im scared and im only 11 so i don't know what they would so to me if i talk back. And it hurts bc i would always smile and stay silent. Bc they love it when i smile so i have to smile even when their yelling at me. Whenever they yell at me i still smile but its hard bc i always cry while smiling. And for the other kids who have good parents. Im jelouse of you but at the same time im happy for you.
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I have 7 things that my mom and dad do in the vid. Tho. I don't wanna fight back. Im scared and im only 11 so i don't know what they would so to me if i talk back. And it hurts bc i would always smile and stay silent. Bc they love it when i smile so i have to smile even when their yelling at me. Whenever they yell at me i still smile but its hard bc i always cry while smiling. And for the other kids who have good parents. Im jelouse of you but at the same time im happy for you.
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Betta
If you grew up in the mid-20th century like I did, you had nowhere to go to get help. There was no support for abused kids cuz physical abuse like beatings was accepted as 'normal. ' Parents could do everything short of murder (and in many cases, including murder) and get away with it, no consequences. There is no such thing as 'the good old days. ' Nostalgia for eras in which there was a license to abuse others (children, wives, minorities, etc) is a mental illness in itself.
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If you grew up in the mid-20th century like I did, you had nowhere to go to get help. There was no support for abused kids cuz physical abuse like beatings was accepted as 'normal. ' Parents could do everything short of murder (and in many cases, including murder) and get away with it, no consequences. There is no such thing as 'the good old days. ' Nostalgia for eras in which there was a license to abuse others (children, wives, minorities, etc) is a mental illness in itself.
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OJ
Some ppl have kids to torture and take out their failures and problems and stress out on. Scapegoats if you will. Slaves if you will. Its all about power play. They are childish bullies that reproduced youre the product of an evil mom but hey at least they didnt kill you or eat you like some other animals do to their young: Alligators, sharks, and even rabbits surprisingly think about how careless and lousy bugs are as parents. Thank god were humans right
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Some ppl have kids to torture and take out their failures and problems and stress out on. Scapegoats if you will. Slaves if you will. Its all about power play. They are childish bullies that reproduced youre the product of an evil mom but hey at least they didnt kill you or eat you like some other animals do to their young: Alligators, sharks, and even rabbits surprisingly think about how careless and lousy bugs are as parents. Thank god were humans right
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Sirijan
well my mother tells me to clean my room, i tell her not to change my bed sheet, she does it anyway, and keeps speaking indirectly, the dog has gone so skinny, no one fed his eggs(not knowing the fact that we did) and anoyyes the crap out of me. idk what you will call this behaviour yet i feel angry and annoyed many times, then calls everyone poor fellow, no matter what lol, i feel like guilt trap whenever she does this. i dont know
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well my mother tells me to clean my room, i tell her not to change my bed sheet, she does it anyway, and keeps speaking indirectly, the dog has gone so skinny, no one fed his eggs(not knowing the fact that we did) and anoyyes the crap out of me. idk what you will call this behaviour yet i feel angry and annoyed many times, then calls everyone poor fellow, no matter what lol, i feel like guilt trap whenever she does this. i dont know
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Utraming
I watch this and i cry. Guilt trap is a common tactic from my mother. She doesn't admit that I'm gay. Everytime I call her to ask her how she was doing, she just appear really hurt and said all her friends are having grandchildren, yet she and dad are all alone and pitied by their friends. I can't do this anymore. She's been giving me constant pressure and emotional damages
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I watch this and i cry. Guilt trap is a common tactic from my mother. She doesn't admit that I'm gay. Everytime I call her to ask her how she was doing, she just appear really hurt and said all her friends are having grandchildren, yet she and dad are all alone and pitied by their friends. I can't do this anymore. She's been giving me constant pressure and emotional damages
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Baconplayz567
My parents are nosy af. They dont let me close my door and they are pushing me to get Eagle in scouts (I really dont care about Im gonna be honest) and they do plenty more things that I dont know if its considered manipulation or not. Its making me go crazy and Im not sure who to trust anymore. I cant tell whos a good guy and whos a bad guy in the situation.
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My parents are nosy af. They dont let me close my door and they are pushing me to get Eagle in scouts (I really dont care about Im gonna be honest) and they do plenty more things that I dont know if its considered manipulation or not. Its making me go crazy and Im not sure who to trust anymore. I cant tell whos a good guy and whos a bad guy in the situation.
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MistryyA
Going through this since I was a kid. Still live with them, but I recently passed my probation at work, at 23-24, and am looking to move out once I've fixed my credit report. It's hell when you win they try blaming it on you or turning it on you. However when they do things it's perfectly fine and then they try bringing in irrelevant stuff in
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Going through this since I was a kid. Still live with them, but I recently passed my probation at work, at 23-24, and am looking to move out once I've fixed my credit report. It's hell when you win they try blaming it on you or turning it on you. However when they do things it's perfectly fine and then they try bringing in irrelevant stuff in
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Dr.
My parents hit 8 out of 10. Good grades were never good enough and even after a Masters degree and 2 doctorates, my mother described me as not the smartest. Today, she is 94 and I have no feelings for her. My best friends are my Great Danes. They show unconditional love, something I never experienced with my parents.
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My parents hit 8 out of 10. Good grades were never good enough and even after a Masters degree and 2 doctorates, my mother described me as not the smartest. Today, she is 94 and I have no feelings for her. My best friends are my Great Danes. They show unconditional love, something I never experienced with my parents.
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Spitfire85
Do what you want to. Don't do what others want you to do. If it's something you don't wanna do say NO whoever might say it. Toxic parents and people force you to believe that 'sometimes you should do things you maybe doesn't want to do' if they say this they are toxic and you should stay away.
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Do what you want to. Don't do what others want you to do. If it's something you don't wanna do say NO whoever might say it. Toxic parents and people force you to believe that 'sometimes you should do things you maybe doesn't want to do' if they say this they are toxic and you should stay away.
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TheUndeadLeader
Well this video really made me crying because my parents really dont care about me so I put my thing Im sorry because I dont know what have I done wrong also it made me sad just seeing them around only my brother and he is ten but that also makes me sad that they dont like me or love me
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Well this video really made me crying because my parents really dont care about me so I put my thing Im sorry because I dont know what have I done wrong also it made me sad just seeing them around only my brother and he is ten but that also makes me sad that they dont like me or love me
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