6 Red Flags You Shouldn't Ignore in Yourself
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Date: 2023-08-20
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Comments and reviews: 25
SebSk
I have #4 and #5. I have OCPD. So in some way, that actually mitigates the negative traits of #5. I would never ever cheat on _anyone_ and I _would_ be able to let someone else depend on me, however, in general, that would only be for the one.
I don't have a need or want to control other people. But I have unhealthy high expectations for myself and project them to other people too, although not to the same degree.
I basically do not or have not for over a decade sought any kind of relationship. And despite being smooth socially I am as an adult satisfied with my friend group and don't really seek out more.
You can't put a person's life in context in 4 sentences (especially when you feel a need to explain as I do) so I'll just leave it at that I guess
It can be really tiring because a significant other would had inspired me passively to achieve more of my aspirations and other obvious things but I just do not want to trust another person really, I have no faith in women in general to be altruistic and loyal (Edit: anymore.
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I have #4 and #5. I have OCPD. So in some way, that actually mitigates the negative traits of #5. I would never ever cheat on _anyone_ and I _would_ be able to let someone else depend on me, however, in general, that would only be for the one.
I don't have a need or want to control other people. But I have unhealthy high expectations for myself and project them to other people too, although not to the same degree.
I basically do not or have not for over a decade sought any kind of relationship. And despite being smooth socially I am as an adult satisfied with my friend group and don't really seek out more.
You can't put a person's life in context in 4 sentences (especially when you feel a need to explain as I do) so I'll just leave it at that I guess
It can be really tiring because a significant other would had inspired me passively to achieve more of my aspirations and other obvious things but I just do not want to trust another person really, I have no faith in women in general to be altruistic and loyal (Edit: anymore.
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Reyozah
I seem to have these 3 problems at work. When I am free, I do not really care cause I am free to do what I want, no pressure.
1) Social Validation for sure, I always use this to ensure I am doing a good job
2) About Need for Control, I always try to do everything myself so I feel like I am contributing towards the company
3) Perfectionism, this seem to be the biggest problem I have at work right now. I've been working there for while, I should know everything, tasks are all easy, in my eyes, I should MAKE ZERO MISTAKES as I already made those mistakes already and learned from it but there are times I still make mistakes and this what frustrates me a lot.
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I seem to have these 3 problems at work. When I am free, I do not really care cause I am free to do what I want, no pressure.
1) Social Validation for sure, I always use this to ensure I am doing a good job
2) About Need for Control, I always try to do everything myself so I feel like I am contributing towards the company
3) Perfectionism, this seem to be the biggest problem I have at work right now. I've been working there for while, I should know everything, tasks are all easy, in my eyes, I should MAKE ZERO MISTAKES as I already made those mistakes already and learned from it but there are times I still make mistakes and this what frustrates me a lot.
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Maychi
how bad is it if it's all of them at once but not to the biggest extent. I've come out of a deep depression state from giving too much energy for everything so perfectionism, need for validation, and control were all my traits. Now it's all in neutral but more in the saving energy. So i have a combination of both high expectations of myself and very low motivation and high expectations for others but low investment in them. As in i just don't give my energy to people anymore and rather see if anyone gives energy to me to even consider giving my time to them. I know full well this isn't good but im also not doing anything for it.
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how bad is it if it's all of them at once but not to the biggest extent. I've come out of a deep depression state from giving too much energy for everything so perfectionism, need for validation, and control were all my traits. Now it's all in neutral but more in the saving energy. So i have a combination of both high expectations of myself and very low motivation and high expectations for others but low investment in them. As in i just don't give my energy to people anymore and rather see if anyone gives energy to me to even consider giving my time to them. I know full well this isn't good but im also not doing anything for it.
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Xamry
For me its feeling emotionally lonely.
Also the part about liking things resolved. I tend to experience avoidant relationships because of my interests. I love learning practical things, thinking critically, and being organised and have my personal life under control.
I struggle finding people who arent stressed about me being that way.
I grew up feeling helpless and now I feel unsafe still, like I cant get it out and those close to me arent interested in collaborating at a resolution because its peace-altering. Im thinking this is the season for me to get it addressed so that I can achieve my peace too.
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For me its feeling emotionally lonely.
Also the part about liking things resolved. I tend to experience avoidant relationships because of my interests. I love learning practical things, thinking critically, and being organised and have my personal life under control.
I struggle finding people who arent stressed about me being that way.
I grew up feeling helpless and now I feel unsafe still, like I cant get it out and those close to me arent interested in collaborating at a resolution because its peace-altering. Im thinking this is the season for me to get it addressed so that I can achieve my peace too.
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Seeth
For all those struggling with negative self talk
When you realise you are talking shit about yourself in your toughts say something positive back by voice
Can be anything really, tell yourself you are dressed sharply today, or that you got a nice ass, or that you are doing great at self improvement.
Or that your memes are the ninth wonder of world
Because the eighth is you dumbass.
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For all those struggling with negative self talk
When you realise you are talking shit about yourself in your toughts say something positive back by voice
Can be anything really, tell yourself you are dressed sharply today, or that you got a nice ass, or that you are doing great at self improvement.
Or that your memes are the ninth wonder of world
Because the eighth is you dumbass.
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KryterSeretGWRF
This term was made by those who trick people around them and used by those who either is too infantile to claim their responsibilities or too ignorant. People around you are mostly rat-like, so changing to please them is a betrayal to your own nature. Stop following theese collectivism nonsense trends. You have all rights to be an asshole to them as long as you are happy.
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This term was made by those who trick people around them and used by those who either is too infantile to claim their responsibilities or too ignorant. People around you are mostly rat-like, so changing to please them is a betrayal to your own nature. Stop following theese collectivism nonsense trends. You have all rights to be an asshole to them as long as you are happy.
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psych2go
I have avoidant attachment that's why I have no long relationship friends (only 1, I don't even talk to my old friends anymore if we don't have any excuse to talk to each other cuz chatting them can just be so random idkkkk, And im just used having my phone on do not disturb, I really need to remove that habit and talk more
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I have avoidant attachment that's why I have no long relationship friends (only 1, I don't even talk to my old friends anymore if we don't have any excuse to talk to each other cuz chatting them can just be so random idkkkk, And im just used having my phone on do not disturb, I really need to remove that habit and talk more
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Desi
My red flags are avoidant attachment and sometimes unconstructive self-talk. I think it's all related with my introverted personality, also i don't like getting involved in other people's business and vice versa. The negative self talk always happens when i embarass myself or do something wrong XD
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My red flags are avoidant attachment and sometimes unconstructive self-talk. I think it's all related with my introverted personality, also i don't like getting involved in other people's business and vice versa. The negative self talk always happens when i embarass myself or do something wrong XD
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Venci
I had stopped my excessive inner monolog that before I excessively used for logical thinking turned sour after a point and became negative. I did at one point decide I'd stop the inner monolog but it just ended up coming back in a year after i felt really down on myself
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I had stopped my excessive inner monolog that before I excessively used for logical thinking turned sour after a point and became negative. I did at one point decide I'd stop the inner monolog but it just ended up coming back in a year after i felt really down on myself
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MatHat186
Negative self taught - check
Need for social validation - depends
Need for control - wouldnt say so
Toxic perfectionism - possibly
Avoiding attachment - never been in a relationship so probably yes
Social media addiction - biggest check ever
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Negative self taught - check
Need for social validation - depends
Need for control - wouldnt say so
Toxic perfectionism - possibly
Avoiding attachment - never been in a relationship so probably yes
Social media addiction - biggest check ever
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Kay
Ok. so I realise that I may be a slight red flag.
I am guilty of:
1
2 (only because I feel my worth is based on how much service I can provide to others, and I find alot of my earlier friendships I gave WAYYYY more then I got back)
4
And 5
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Ok. so I realise that I may be a slight red flag.
I am guilty of:
1
2 (only because I feel my worth is based on how much service I can provide to others, and I find alot of my earlier friendships I gave WAYYYY more then I got back)
4
And 5
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Iza
I have 3 of these constantly seeking for validation, being addicted to social media and perfectionism. What i know so far is that all of them are leaves from the same root: insecurity.
Im trying to heal them slowly!
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I have 3 of these constantly seeking for validation, being addicted to social media and perfectionism. What i know so far is that all of them are leaves from the same root: insecurity.
Im trying to heal them slowly!
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Istudy
I use to relate to all of these signs a lot and still do bit the only thing that has changed is that I have started to look at these signs negatively, and also avoid myself to be with toxic people
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I use to relate to all of these signs a lot and still do bit the only thing that has changed is that I have started to look at these signs negatively, and also avoid myself to be with toxic people
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CHILL
My red flags are:
1. Avoidant attachment.
2. Neurotic need for social validation.
3. Toxic perfectionism.
Are there any tips y'all people can give me to change for the better.
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My red flags are:
1. Avoidant attachment.
2. Neurotic need for social validation.
3. Toxic perfectionism.
Are there any tips y'all people can give me to change for the better.
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mAkAkA
Okay okay okay we good. I WAS worried about you calling me out on every single one of these, but then you said the sixth and I don't have a social media problem so we good we good B)
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Okay okay okay we good. I WAS worried about you calling me out on every single one of these, but then you said the sixth and I don't have a social media problem so we good we good B)
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Sun
I have all the other 5 but I'm not addicted to social media,
I guess it's a good place for me to start!
I'll come back to this comment when I could improve any of them!
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I have all the other 5 but I'm not addicted to social media,
I guess it's a good place for me to start!
I'll come back to this comment when I could improve any of them!
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Angela
With self-deprecation, I feel like if its something you would never ever say to someone else, you shouldn't talk to yourself with those words. Never be your own bully
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With self-deprecation, I feel like if its something you would never ever say to someone else, you shouldn't talk to yourself with those words. Never be your own bully
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xcartoonloverxgirl
I think its probably really unhealthy to not do anything about my mental health and just wait for it to go away but I literally have no choice lol
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I think its probably really unhealthy to not do anything about my mental health and just wait for it to go away but I literally have no choice lol
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Fan
The need for social validation one?
would that one of my red flags?
I do similar things and want similar things.
idk it's really late at night
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The need for social validation one?
would that one of my red flags?
I do similar things and want similar things.
idk it's really late at night
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DiginauterZockt
This sounds like one of those self diagnosis things but I appear to have all of these, but what now? I can't exactly stop it
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This sounds like one of those self diagnosis things but I appear to have all of these, but what now? I can't exactly stop it
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Kohinatto
Video: Toxic perfectionism
Me: It's ok. I only demand perection from myself
Video: Self-control freaks
Me: Oh.
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Video: Toxic perfectionism
Me: It's ok. I only demand perection from myself
Video: Self-control freaks
Me: Oh.
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Brenda
I see these in some people i know should i call them out. They mostly know and are trying to but i got hurt in process
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I see these in some people i know should i call them out. They mostly know and are trying to but i got hurt in process
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GOOFofaDOG
5/6 of these. I've known about these issues, but not until recently did I finally seek help. It's a tough road.
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5/6 of these. I've known about these issues, but not until recently did I finally seek help. It's a tough road.
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Czache
My red flags are some of these but i never be mean or rude to anyone but i have a slight anger issue problem
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My red flags are some of these but i never be mean or rude to anyone but i have a slight anger issue problem
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Kevin
I got all of these issues except for social media addiction. I'm seeing a councilor on Monday with the issues
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I got all of these issues except for social media addiction. I'm seeing a councilor on Monday with the issues
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