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zakruti.com » Humor, fun and entertainment » Lazy Game Reviews
LGR - Duke Nukem Forever Review

LGR - Duke Nukem Forever Review

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Rating: 4.0; Vote: 1
Is the game really as bad as so many would like you to believe? How does it compare to Duke Nukem 3D? Those questions and more are answered here as fairly as possible by a long-time Duke fan. Watch the higher-quality version of this review here: EDIT: Dude, I never said the game was the best in the world. Yes, the game is kind of crap. But it's enjoyable Duke crap. It's no Duke3D, in fact, in pales in comparison. But I had fun with what it was: an average, broken, rescued game that happens to have Duke Nukem in it. Randy Pitchford's cheeseburger vs. caviar analogy makes a lot of sense. Buy DNF here to help support LGR!
Date: 2022-04-14

Comments and reviews: 10


I know this game is pretty old now, but they really screwed the pooch on this one. They failed to recognise the proper demographic for the game. Most people who bought this game were DN veterans so they did not care about modern mechanics with weapon limitations and regenerating health bull shiet. They just wanted their old Duke with a new paint job, plenty of guns, cheezy one liners and a few new bells and whistles on top. That's all they had to do. Instead they made some kind of Halo clone with 2 weapons and regenerating HP bar and gfx that look a generation old already for 2010.
This game should have been more like Doom 2016, instead it fizzled out like so many forgetable shooters of the day. What a missed opportunity to do something great for the community.
They even took out the KICK! That is blasphemy!

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I suppose I should maybe give credit where credit is due.
I don't like the game, It felt very awkward. All of it except for my button inputs, I did not like. Mind you that's not the only credit I'm giving due. But there's still soooo much. Take the white board for instance, esp on console version of the game. When you draw literally anything it turns out Like a kid's drawing, and from then on I was a little 4 yr old asshole kid running around with guns that somehow everyone loved.
I'm sorry, there are issues and everyone took them different which is okay. I just want to say at least that with the amount of whatevers that happened during the making of dnf, at least they were able to make a game that works.

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The issue that you're missing here, Clint, is that this game was overly hyped and spent a long time in development hell. What we got was a mediocre at worst/decent at best shooter when people were expecting something fantastic. The hype is what messed this game up at launch. Unfairly? Yeah. Kinda. But it had to be better than how superfluously it was advertised, and it simply wasn't. It's not terrible like some hyperbolic people tend to make it out to be, but it's not good either. It's. okay.
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I'm glad I knew this game was an absolute shitshow when I bought it for $5 because I might've felt misled by this review had I seen only it first. -
And this is coming from someone who played D3D as a teen and would have loved for DNF to be awesome.
This review ignores the exclusively corridor-structured level design and relative lack of enemies. You're never attacked by more than 3 enemies at once because of piss-poor unoptimized code. How can that ever qualify as exciting?

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I Agree. playing a game (or watching a movie) without comparing it to other games (movies) is the way to go. We CAN'T keep playing the same old games (watch the same old movies) forever, at some point there must be something new.
Only complaint i had with DNF, was the hardware requirements to play it smoothly. my old pc plays most games at medium quality, with minor lag, but DNF was a little too laggy in every combat scenario, so i never played it past the first shrinking stage.

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I finished DNF few months ago after a 9 year break from it.
Summarized, it felt disappointing and way too adjusted for consoles at the time. Cant blame it due to that hellish development cycle.
Brightness was weird, either too dark or too bright, really didnt like that yellowish tinge that was in place in most of the game and lot less punch to the overall game compared to Duke3D but not necessarily the worst game made, just underwhelming.

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NOPE. I was one of the nincompoops that paid to reserve a copy from GameStop but got tired of waiting and found it online for half price, bought, played it and HATED it. Was NOT worth the wait. The misogyny and homophobia we're over the top and game play mechanics were God awful. It did not age well. Bad reviews killed it and were deserved. Well that was just over a decade ago. Still like the original DN3D.
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I think the success of recent Doom games shows that OTT shooters are back in vogue, and wouldn't be surprised that people would enjoy it now. It surprises me on how many notes the likes of Doom 2016/Eternal takes from this too, especially the glory kill system.
That said, I'm not really a fan of this game. Got bored of it quickly and haven't touched it since.

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I recently decided to give DNF another try and I gotta say I agree with a lot of points here.
Considering its rocky development and release, the game has actually aged pretty well and still remains fun. Mechanically and visually it's not the best but it still -feels- like Duke and that is still fun today, especially compared to the sea of -serious- shooters.

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I absolutely love this review man, finally someone who-s not ready to just rip this sucker apart. I agree with 14 years in development there was no way anything was going to live up to that kind a high but it-s no damn Daikatana, no that-s not the worst game in the world if you could actually get past the first $&--: ! couple hours.
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