Unhappy and unmotivated. - Blogilates
video description
Shifts it from how you look to the actual day to day and healthier, longer term goals. The how I look is so unmotivating because I could work out for 2 months straight and see little change in my body and it would be frustrating and I would stop. Also for many of us, one fit person is still not going to have the same body shape of another slim person (ex. no matter how fit you get you probably won't look like that tall, huge (maybe fake) big boot fitness model. Now when I focus of the slow and steady, the it's ok if I missed a day because it's still a habit it's easy to see me get better in performance and feel stronger. I'm not sure why I thought 2 months would totally change my body composition because many of the fitness icons I've looked at even look a lot different 3 years since they started working out vs. the first 6 months of working out. If you keep healthy habits then you will change eventually, just don't worry about that too much because it could be a nice surprise when a year from now (a very reasonable time frame) you notice that you do have better body (especially since a lot of that better may be in feeling better mentally and health-wise, which of course is important.
Date: 2022-04-28
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Comments and reviews: 9
Transform
When most people get started, they do WAY too much. Consistency is the most important, even if you don't do much. There was a time when I experienced depression, but I've always been an athlete, so I knew doing some type of activity would boost my mood and my confidence. The only thing I could muster up the energy to do was drive to the gym and start walking on the indoor track. While walking, I often listened to music or audiobooks. Sometimes I stayed for 20 minutes. Sometimes I stayed for an hour. Once I became consistent, I noticed the fitness classes. At first, I just watched for a few minutes and left. The instructor saw me one day and invited me in. I was a little nervous, so I told her I'd come back some other time. I DID come back and I loved the class so much I made it part of my routine 2x a week!
Long story short. Get started with something easy. Jim Rohn says Easy is something you can do. You don't have to do more until you've built the confidence to do so. And that will come with time. So cut yourself some slack. You're doing the best you can: )
PS - That fitness class I went to inspired me to BECOME a fitness instructor. it LITERALLY altered the course of my life. Not saying this exact scenario will happen for you, but I do know that by doing something good for ourselves, we often find inspiration in the unlikeliest of places
reply
When most people get started, they do WAY too much. Consistency is the most important, even if you don't do much. There was a time when I experienced depression, but I've always been an athlete, so I knew doing some type of activity would boost my mood and my confidence. The only thing I could muster up the energy to do was drive to the gym and start walking on the indoor track. While walking, I often listened to music or audiobooks. Sometimes I stayed for 20 minutes. Sometimes I stayed for an hour. Once I became consistent, I noticed the fitness classes. At first, I just watched for a few minutes and left. The instructor saw me one day and invited me in. I was a little nervous, so I told her I'd come back some other time. I DID come back and I loved the class so much I made it part of my routine 2x a week!
Long story short. Get started with something easy. Jim Rohn says Easy is something you can do. You don't have to do more until you've built the confidence to do so. And that will come with time. So cut yourself some slack. You're doing the best you can: )
PS - That fitness class I went to inspired me to BECOME a fitness instructor. it LITERALLY altered the course of my life. Not saying this exact scenario will happen for you, but I do know that by doing something good for ourselves, we often find inspiration in the unlikeliest of places
reply
Adrian
I think for the food eating part there may be something more at play, something deeper. Since this is an advice column, and Cassy has invited our thoughts. I think this girl should reflect why she finds comfort in food. She already binge eats, and feels guilty now about it. Why is that? Does she enjoy it in the moment? Really tap in to why you do it. Some people with this issue may find that they don't love themsleves enough, or are filling some kind of void. Definitely shifting focus why you want to reach a particular health and fitness goal is something that should be looked at - do you want to just be slim? Or is it more health related? It can be pretty daunting to think of how much work has to be done, so break goals down into smaller chunks. Work your way up. It is a journey after all! And perhaps even the gym isn't something for this girl. Maybe hiking or a dance class might be more up her alley! Also, there are so many images of these super fit, slim girls out there. It can be pretty intimidating and many people probably think that they could never get to that point. Maybe finding someone you find that you can relate to more will help you feel more motivated because what they are doing/how they look is inspiring and relateable. Not that Cassy isn't relatable or inspiring! Just find other people as well!
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I think for the food eating part there may be something more at play, something deeper. Since this is an advice column, and Cassy has invited our thoughts. I think this girl should reflect why she finds comfort in food. She already binge eats, and feels guilty now about it. Why is that? Does she enjoy it in the moment? Really tap in to why you do it. Some people with this issue may find that they don't love themsleves enough, or are filling some kind of void. Definitely shifting focus why you want to reach a particular health and fitness goal is something that should be looked at - do you want to just be slim? Or is it more health related? It can be pretty daunting to think of how much work has to be done, so break goals down into smaller chunks. Work your way up. It is a journey after all! And perhaps even the gym isn't something for this girl. Maybe hiking or a dance class might be more up her alley! Also, there are so many images of these super fit, slim girls out there. It can be pretty intimidating and many people probably think that they could never get to that point. Maybe finding someone you find that you can relate to more will help you feel more motivated because what they are doing/how they look is inspiring and relateable. Not that Cassy isn't relatable or inspiring! Just find other people as well!
reply
Athena
Dear Unhappy & Unmotivated,
Please don't ever question if something is wrong with you again if you can help it. it's such a defeating thought. I know it's hard, I use to wonder the same thing. If you are wondering this because of what other people are saying or doing, then try to stop paying so much attention to what those people are saying or doing. I know for me this happened because the people who's opinions I cared about were the ones who made me question if something was wrong with me, and we should never do that to ourselves. One thing that has helped me in this journey of becoming more confident in my own skin and stop caring about what people think so much is I read this book. it's called Boundaries I forgot the Arthur tho. It's all in your mindset. and maybe really think about these people and their mindset. it's not always you especially if your thinking a thought like THAT, something, or someone brought that on. I came also to the realization that everyone sees through their own lense which is a compellation of their own beliefs and experiences in life, and if anyone has ever asked you What is wrong with you? or made you feel that way, something is wrong with them for simply thinking that it's okay to ask a person that period. I hope you feel better.
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Dear Unhappy & Unmotivated,
Please don't ever question if something is wrong with you again if you can help it. it's such a defeating thought. I know it's hard, I use to wonder the same thing. If you are wondering this because of what other people are saying or doing, then try to stop paying so much attention to what those people are saying or doing. I know for me this happened because the people who's opinions I cared about were the ones who made me question if something was wrong with me, and we should never do that to ourselves. One thing that has helped me in this journey of becoming more confident in my own skin and stop caring about what people think so much is I read this book. it's called Boundaries I forgot the Arthur tho. It's all in your mindset. and maybe really think about these people and their mindset. it's not always you especially if your thinking a thought like THAT, something, or someone brought that on. I came also to the realization that everyone sees through their own lense which is a compellation of their own beliefs and experiences in life, and if anyone has ever asked you What is wrong with you? or made you feel that way, something is wrong with them for simply thinking that it's okay to ask a person that period. I hope you feel better.
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silentvoices
Dear Cassey,
I don't know if you have an advice for having an unhealthy relationship with the scale? My relationship with my scale is very unhealthy. I weight myself everyday. If I see I gained even 1lb or 2lbs I freak out and I get to the point I refuse to eat and just fill myself up with water. Then once I see the pounds gone I still push to lose more. There are times I forced myself to workout 2 hours straight to make sure I burn hose calories and shred those pounds gained. I remember after doing that, my body was so weak, I couldn't even get out of bed. I know, this is a dangerous zone to be in, but I just don't know how to make this negative into a positive. I've struggled with my weight for years. I'm overweight, right now, and I'm working hard, i even have a nutritionist to help me because I've been trying to have the control of my own diet and physical activity that I go astray with my journey. During this pandemic I've gained 18lbs from the 33 I lost. I'm so mad at myself for it. This is why, I'm working hard to change things but, back to the scale. it's very hard for me to see the numbers, because the moment I see a pound gained I freak out and I feel like a failure.
sincerely,
Unhealthy Struggle
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Dear Cassey,
I don't know if you have an advice for having an unhealthy relationship with the scale? My relationship with my scale is very unhealthy. I weight myself everyday. If I see I gained even 1lb or 2lbs I freak out and I get to the point I refuse to eat and just fill myself up with water. Then once I see the pounds gone I still push to lose more. There are times I forced myself to workout 2 hours straight to make sure I burn hose calories and shred those pounds gained. I remember after doing that, my body was so weak, I couldn't even get out of bed. I know, this is a dangerous zone to be in, but I just don't know how to make this negative into a positive. I've struggled with my weight for years. I'm overweight, right now, and I'm working hard, i even have a nutritionist to help me because I've been trying to have the control of my own diet and physical activity that I go astray with my journey. During this pandemic I've gained 18lbs from the 33 I lost. I'm so mad at myself for it. This is why, I'm working hard to change things but, back to the scale. it's very hard for me to see the numbers, because the moment I see a pound gained I freak out and I feel like a failure.
sincerely,
Unhealthy Struggle
reply
Petra
Hi all! I just recently got out of my food jail after about 2 years of consistent binge eating and weight gain.
This is how I got out: (this is all from personal experience so you don't have to do exactly what I did; ) )
Everyday I ate some kind of food that I had told myself was bad with EVERY meal. This meant that I still ate breakfast (like peanut butter oatmeal with banana and honey) but I also had a cookie on the side, or I had lunch but added a big bowl of cereal.
This helped me rebuild my body's trust in me that those types of foods would always be available. I started bingeing because I knew that I wasn't allowed certain foods, so when I was able to eat them at every meal my body now trusted that I would always be able to eat them. I was able to stop bingeing because I was full from the day.
Now my body knows that I can have a treat anytime throughout the day and sometimes I go through days with 5 treats, some days with only 1, but now I've found a sustainable balance so that I can live my life without being in food jail.
And thank you so much to Cassey for all her wonderful workouts and life advice!
reply
Hi all! I just recently got out of my food jail after about 2 years of consistent binge eating and weight gain.
This is how I got out: (this is all from personal experience so you don't have to do exactly what I did; ) )
Everyday I ate some kind of food that I had told myself was bad with EVERY meal. This meant that I still ate breakfast (like peanut butter oatmeal with banana and honey) but I also had a cookie on the side, or I had lunch but added a big bowl of cereal.
This helped me rebuild my body's trust in me that those types of foods would always be available. I started bingeing because I knew that I wasn't allowed certain foods, so when I was able to eat them at every meal my body now trusted that I would always be able to eat them. I was able to stop bingeing because I was full from the day.
Now my body knows that I can have a treat anytime throughout the day and sometimes I go through days with 5 treats, some days with only 1, but now I've found a sustainable balance so that I can live my life without being in food jail.
And thank you so much to Cassey for all her wonderful workouts and life advice!
reply
Pamla
I appreciate your advice to unhappy and unmotivated. I too am on a 90 day journey as you suggested. My hardest thing is binge eating snacks after hours. Ive been not eating before 11: 00 am and not after 7: 00 pm for a year now. But sometimes I just binge and dont stop. I dont really get on a scale, I judge my self by how my clothing fits and how I look in my clothes. I do cardio 5 days a week for at least an hour and do whatever new you have going on your 5 or 6 days a week. This has been my regimen and I dont feel like I see what I really need to see. Sometimes I eat clean sometimes I dont. I am honestly about half n half. I dont give up though. I keep going even though I get discouraged. I want to be super thin again wearing a size 8. I wear a size 10-12. Mostly 12 because of lower belly fat. My husband says he sees me going down. But I need an encouraging word or two from you. Plus Im 62 so my metabolism is slower. But I work out 6 days a week. Pleas tell me something!
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I appreciate your advice to unhappy and unmotivated. I too am on a 90 day journey as you suggested. My hardest thing is binge eating snacks after hours. Ive been not eating before 11: 00 am and not after 7: 00 pm for a year now. But sometimes I just binge and dont stop. I dont really get on a scale, I judge my self by how my clothing fits and how I look in my clothes. I do cardio 5 days a week for at least an hour and do whatever new you have going on your 5 or 6 days a week. This has been my regimen and I dont feel like I see what I really need to see. Sometimes I eat clean sometimes I dont. I am honestly about half n half. I dont give up though. I keep going even though I get discouraged. I want to be super thin again wearing a size 8. I wear a size 10-12. Mostly 12 because of lower belly fat. My husband says he sees me going down. But I need an encouraging word or two from you. Plus Im 62 so my metabolism is slower. But I work out 6 days a week. Pleas tell me something!
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Tati
Unhappy and unmotivated, this comment comes a bit late, hope you are not feeling like this anymore. I am trying too. I found that most of the times, food plays a major role in psychology. I love junk food but I find that most of the times, after I eat it I don't feel good. Instead, if i eat yoghurt with crispy bread or salad with crispy bread(i like it crispy because it feels like chips) I feel better afterwards and it is also healthy! I can't comment about the chocolate, because no matter how many fruits i eat, i always crave chocolate! So i try to eat cereal bars for my dose of chocolate! I also hate working out! I love walking though and i recently start running. I am not good, but I am trying. So. make a schedule, at first 2 times a week, for let's say 30 minutes of walking. And then you can walk some more and then maybe start running. You will feel better about yourself, you'll see. Hope i helped. Have a great day and love yourself!
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Unhappy and unmotivated, this comment comes a bit late, hope you are not feeling like this anymore. I am trying too. I found that most of the times, food plays a major role in psychology. I love junk food but I find that most of the times, after I eat it I don't feel good. Instead, if i eat yoghurt with crispy bread or salad with crispy bread(i like it crispy because it feels like chips) I feel better afterwards and it is also healthy! I can't comment about the chocolate, because no matter how many fruits i eat, i always crave chocolate! So i try to eat cereal bars for my dose of chocolate! I also hate working out! I love walking though and i recently start running. I am not good, but I am trying. So. make a schedule, at first 2 times a week, for let's say 30 minutes of walking. And then you can walk some more and then maybe start running. You will feel better about yourself, you'll see. Hope i helped. Have a great day and love yourself!
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Kelly
Dear Cassey,
In 2020, I was working out like crazy, burning more than 2000 calories from physical activity. And I wasn't eating enough either. I lost my period in august of 2020 but I only realized it until December (because my periods are always late. After realizing this, I started eating more and decreasing my workout schedule. But, one morning, I woke up and my back was aching like crazy. Turns out I have a lower back injury and now I have to stop working out completely. I think it was because I was missing so much calcium that my bones are getting weaker. I still have my injury now but I'm getting period symptoms every now and then. However, even after losing my period, I still feel like I have to overwork myself to get that perfect body, even right now. I am waiting impatiently for my injury to be over so I can work out again, but I don't think it's a good idea. I'm very confused about the topic and I don't know what to do!
reply
Dear Cassey,
In 2020, I was working out like crazy, burning more than 2000 calories from physical activity. And I wasn't eating enough either. I lost my period in august of 2020 but I only realized it until December (because my periods are always late. After realizing this, I started eating more and decreasing my workout schedule. But, one morning, I woke up and my back was aching like crazy. Turns out I have a lower back injury and now I have to stop working out completely. I think it was because I was missing so much calcium that my bones are getting weaker. I still have my injury now but I'm getting period symptoms every now and then. However, even after losing my period, I still feel like I have to overwork myself to get that perfect body, even right now. I am waiting impatiently for my injury to be over so I can work out again, but I don't think it's a good idea. I'm very confused about the topic and I don't know what to do!
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Ayesha
Hi Cassie, The advice you gave is really good and can be helpful but, it seems like this person has more going on than just being unmotivated. I suffer from anxiety and I have been in These shoes. I wanted to work out ME not anyone else, I knew how great I felt after a workout but because of anxiety I could not bring myself to do anything. This led to depression. These are mental health issues that will sometimes cause people to stay in bed all day and not do anything. Your point is correct, but I feel this situation just goes beyond find your why and write it down. I would have people say that to me and it would frustrate me. I finally got better once I sought proper counseling from a therapist and medication from my doctor. From personal experience, yes all the advice you gave is correct, which I heard many times, but I was only able to follow it and be successful after seeking proper therapy and treatment.
reply
Hi Cassie, The advice you gave is really good and can be helpful but, it seems like this person has more going on than just being unmotivated. I suffer from anxiety and I have been in These shoes. I wanted to work out ME not anyone else, I knew how great I felt after a workout but because of anxiety I could not bring myself to do anything. This led to depression. These are mental health issues that will sometimes cause people to stay in bed all day and not do anything. Your point is correct, but I feel this situation just goes beyond find your why and write it down. I would have people say that to me and it would frustrate me. I finally got better once I sought proper counseling from a therapist and medication from my doctor. From personal experience, yes all the advice you gave is correct, which I heard many times, but I was only able to follow it and be successful after seeking proper therapy and treatment.
reply
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