6 Phrases Manipulators Say To Make You Feel Crazy
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Date: 2023-08-20
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Comments and reviews: 25
Scate
Wait. So it's not okay to ask for help and explain why you need help? Like, I feel like the one about taking the trash out requires you to assume that the other person has self centered motives, rather than offering the benefit of the doubt.
That's fine in situations where there's a pattern of the other person consistently acting self centered and refusing to participate in a pattern of fair reciprocation. But it seems bonkers to slap the manipulator label on anyone who says I'm not feeling well. I know it's my turn to do [insert task]. But will you do it tonight so I can go rest, pretty please? I would appreciate it so much. I mean, as long as they don't act like an ahole if the person refuses.
Maybe the pattern is supposed to be implied. But this is just asking for an abusive and/or victimhood complex to start flinging the gaslighter and emotional abuse accusations around in response to a genuine request for assistance.
Especially since this video takes a binary approach that a person is either a manipulator or not a manipulator with the implication that manipulator = bad human, even though basically everyone is guilty of being manipulative sometimes (even if they are very mature emotionally.
Framing the script such that the viewer is automatically in the victim role and is not a manipulator is also problematic. Psych education should be dual function. It should help people recognize when they are being treated unfairly or harmfully, but it should also have a self reflective function. Assigning any and all viewers to the victimized perfect person role makes personal growth much more difficult.
Behaviors That You May Not Realize are Manipulative is a much more responsible angle that would better serve the audience.
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Wait. So it's not okay to ask for help and explain why you need help? Like, I feel like the one about taking the trash out requires you to assume that the other person has self centered motives, rather than offering the benefit of the doubt.
That's fine in situations where there's a pattern of the other person consistently acting self centered and refusing to participate in a pattern of fair reciprocation. But it seems bonkers to slap the manipulator label on anyone who says I'm not feeling well. I know it's my turn to do [insert task]. But will you do it tonight so I can go rest, pretty please? I would appreciate it so much. I mean, as long as they don't act like an ahole if the person refuses.
Maybe the pattern is supposed to be implied. But this is just asking for an abusive and/or victimhood complex to start flinging the gaslighter and emotional abuse accusations around in response to a genuine request for assistance.
Especially since this video takes a binary approach that a person is either a manipulator or not a manipulator with the implication that manipulator = bad human, even though basically everyone is guilty of being manipulative sometimes (even if they are very mature emotionally.
Framing the script such that the viewer is automatically in the victim role and is not a manipulator is also problematic. Psych education should be dual function. It should help people recognize when they are being treated unfairly or harmfully, but it should also have a self reflective function. Assigning any and all viewers to the victimized perfect person role makes personal growth much more difficult.
Behaviors That You May Not Realize are Manipulative is a much more responsible angle that would better serve the audience.
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muskndusk
If someone has said that they will do a certain job, I expect them to do it and will later ask why it hasn't been done. Someone who owes me money has been delaying completing his parents probate forms for about ten years: I still haven't had the money back.
I have severe osteoporosis and can't carry heavy shopping (so usually do it online. If I'm out with someone and I have two bags to carry while they have none, I would expect them to take a bag from me - just out of friendship. If they don't, I'll ask and get angry if they refuse.
I think some of the things 'Manipulators' are accused of doing in this video can be reasonable things to do in relationships and friendships. I wouldn't object if the other person did them. This isn't what I'd term as manipulation.
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If someone has said that they will do a certain job, I expect them to do it and will later ask why it hasn't been done. Someone who owes me money has been delaying completing his parents probate forms for about ten years: I still haven't had the money back.
I have severe osteoporosis and can't carry heavy shopping (so usually do it online. If I'm out with someone and I have two bags to carry while they have none, I would expect them to take a bag from me - just out of friendship. If they don't, I'll ask and get angry if they refuse.
I think some of the things 'Manipulators' are accused of doing in this video can be reasonable things to do in relationships and friendships. I wouldn't object if the other person did them. This isn't what I'd term as manipulation.
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Leia
I DEFINITELY experienced the silent treatment and the one where the task is brought up again and again and again. They're two of my bio father's favorite tactics; those, and guilt trips. ALWAYS with the guilt trips and silent treatment. It was awful; I felt like I was walking on eggshells in my own home! After a few months, I couldn't take it anymore and moved out.
To anyone experiencing these or any other manipulation tactics, you can try communication, but if it doesn't work, get away from the manipulator as soon as you possibly can. Your mental health will thank you for it!
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I DEFINITELY experienced the silent treatment and the one where the task is brought up again and again and again. They're two of my bio father's favorite tactics; those, and guilt trips. ALWAYS with the guilt trips and silent treatment. It was awful; I felt like I was walking on eggshells in my own home! After a few months, I couldn't take it anymore and moved out.
To anyone experiencing these or any other manipulation tactics, you can try communication, but if it doesn't work, get away from the manipulator as soon as you possibly can. Your mental health will thank you for it!
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David
Most that use families and monkeys, continually orientate their group to desired output. To get the message they want the target to hear.
Parents raise their kids to be extensions of them, reinforced by their parents monkeys. So the kids think it's normal. But feel special, adding to the negative talk directed toward the target.
So they experience rewards for being darker and darker, but only as long as they still stay under the wings of their parents.
It's really sick. But the parents or adult monkeys 'feel' there's absolutely nothing wrong with it.
It's sick.
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Most that use families and monkeys, continually orientate their group to desired output. To get the message they want the target to hear.
Parents raise their kids to be extensions of them, reinforced by their parents monkeys. So the kids think it's normal. But feel special, adding to the negative talk directed toward the target.
So they experience rewards for being darker and darker, but only as long as they still stay under the wings of their parents.
It's really sick. But the parents or adult monkeys 'feel' there's absolutely nothing wrong with it.
It's sick.
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Crab
Honest question regarding regression:
I've had to ask my partner for several days to do something before they wind up actually doing it, and I'll have to ask them several times over until either they do it or I have to cave and do it myself. A lot of the time, I had to do it myself. Is it really wrong to voice at least a little frustration when they do this time and time again? It just makes things feel one-sided sometimes and trying to voice any grievances even at a reasonable tone seems to just tick them off.
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Honest question regarding regression:
I've had to ask my partner for several days to do something before they wind up actually doing it, and I'll have to ask them several times over until either they do it or I have to cave and do it myself. A lot of the time, I had to do it myself. Is it really wrong to voice at least a little frustration when they do this time and time again? It just makes things feel one-sided sometimes and trying to voice any grievances even at a reasonable tone seems to just tick them off.
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HneyFlwr380
I always thought this was like-
Something that a lot of married couples and couples do.
Nagging.
My ex constantly nagged me to make a tiktok account but I wasnt okay with it. Almost every day for a whole month;
Did you make the account yet?
And eventually she just said you know what? Youll never do it. Never mind.
And so many other behaviors of narcissism. But I didnt think about it because I was in love. Well, we all learn at some point!
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I always thought this was like-
Something that a lot of married couples and couples do.
Nagging.
My ex constantly nagged me to make a tiktok account but I wasnt okay with it. Almost every day for a whole month;
Did you make the account yet?
And eventually she just said you know what? Youll never do it. Never mind.
And so many other behaviors of narcissism. But I didnt think about it because I was in love. Well, we all learn at some point!
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John
Context is key. Just because someone reasons with someone or compliments them doesn't mean they're being manipulative. Could those be used to manipulate? Of course. .but be careful to make sweeping generalizations. Sorta like how everyone calling their x a narcissist these days. lol yeah maybe not. Maybe they just finally put themselves first because they'd been sacrificing too much in the relationship. or any number of other possibilities besides narcissism lol
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Context is key. Just because someone reasons with someone or compliments them doesn't mean they're being manipulative. Could those be used to manipulate? Of course. .but be careful to make sweeping generalizations. Sorta like how everyone calling their x a narcissist these days. lol yeah maybe not. Maybe they just finally put themselves first because they'd been sacrificing too much in the relationship. or any number of other possibilities besides narcissism lol
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Marta
Hey
You forgot to mention the manipulation throw fear. In which theres two people, the first one is the manipulator that is also an agressive person, And has even punched someone else in front of the second person. The second person is someone who hates fights and screams. The manipulator is aware of that and also of the fact that the second person is afraid of him, and so use this in his own benifite to make the second person do whatever he wants
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Hey
You forgot to mention the manipulation throw fear. In which theres two people, the first one is the manipulator that is also an agressive person, And has even punched someone else in front of the second person. The second person is someone who hates fights and screams. The manipulator is aware of that and also of the fact that the second person is afraid of him, and so use this in his own benifite to make the second person do whatever he wants
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education
Ok, ok! Not like that! Let me explain whenever my friends were gaveling problems with each other I would manipulate them to fix the problems. I would convince the other that there was no problem. Sometimes if I was tired and didnt want to call-often-I would say I was not available i also used my dads death as a guilt tripping factor. Im a better person now, despite my twisted-ish mindset, and am a retired manipulator
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Ok, ok! Not like that! Let me explain whenever my friends were gaveling problems with each other I would manipulate them to fix the problems. I would convince the other that there was no problem. Sometimes if I was tired and didnt want to call-often-I would say I was not available i also used my dads death as a guilt tripping factor. Im a better person now, despite my twisted-ish mindset, and am a retired manipulator
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Gridkeeper
I really love that you have Amphibia characters as it is a perfect example of toxic friendships and this is one of my favourite TV shows. One of the toxic traits did include Sasha being the manipulator of the group so she keeps the friendship under control, while she does care for her friends, her methods were pretty harmful. Good intentions or not, I learned to stand my ground.
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I really love that you have Amphibia characters as it is a perfect example of toxic friendships and this is one of my favourite TV shows. One of the toxic traits did include Sasha being the manipulator of the group so she keeps the friendship under control, while she does care for her friends, her methods were pretty harmful. Good intentions or not, I learned to stand my ground.
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DMTdreamz
In 1947, a couple of aliens flew to Earth in a silver saucer-shaped craft. After closely observing mankind, they shit themselves laughing and crashed into the desert in Roswell, New Mexico. The US Army found the shit covered craft, conducted an investigation, deduced what happened and out of embarressment told the public it was a weather balloon.
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In 1947, a couple of aliens flew to Earth in a silver saucer-shaped craft. After closely observing mankind, they shit themselves laughing and crashed into the desert in Roswell, New Mexico. The US Army found the shit covered craft, conducted an investigation, deduced what happened and out of embarressment told the public it was a weather balloon.
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nereids
We live in a society that it is frowned about to ask for help. Covert manipulation is common place but I do not think it is deliberate. Becoming aware of this behaviour is amazing but not being hard on yourself for realising that you are not meant to do everything on your own & being clear about your needs is the only way to get what you want/need
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We live in a society that it is frowned about to ask for help. Covert manipulation is common place but I do not think it is deliberate. Becoming aware of this behaviour is amazing but not being hard on yourself for realising that you are not meant to do everything on your own & being clear about your needs is the only way to get what you want/need
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PsychicSploob
Thank you so much for making these kinds of videos. To people who have been manipulated by nearly all of their family and loved ones, it can difficult to tell that these behaviors arent normal or healthy. It really helps put things into perspective and realize they arent to blame for all of that mistreatment.
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Thank you so much for making these kinds of videos. To people who have been manipulated by nearly all of their family and loved ones, it can difficult to tell that these behaviors arent normal or healthy. It really helps put things into perspective and realize they arent to blame for all of that mistreatment.
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The
This video is relatable. My cat is extremely manipulative, one second she will be purring and the next she's biting my arm off. I told her to stop as she was negatively affecting my mental health but she will not listen. I think I need to put her in a self-improvement class on SkillShare. What do you guys think?
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This video is relatable. My cat is extremely manipulative, one second she will be purring and the next she's biting my arm off. I told her to stop as she was negatively affecting my mental health but she will not listen. I think I need to put her in a self-improvement class on SkillShare. What do you guys think?
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MissMagenta
Ugh. Guilty of two of these, both from the past and current, though the latter is without meaning to be manipulative or malicious- a habit I haven't broken. Still not an excuse, gotta work on that. I do have therapy tomorrow, so I can talk about it with my therapist and tactics to work on it.
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Ugh. Guilty of two of these, both from the past and current, though the latter is without meaning to be manipulative or malicious- a habit I haven't broken. Still not an excuse, gotta work on that. I do have therapy tomorrow, so I can talk about it with my therapist and tactics to work on it.
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Mr
i disagree with the 5th one, it doesn't make sense at all. there's nothing wrong with keep reminding the person their task which they agreed and promised to do, this video is misleading and could make someone who is actually manipulative to feel that they get manipulated.
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i disagree with the 5th one, it doesn't make sense at all. there's nothing wrong with keep reminding the person their task which they agreed and promised to do, this video is misleading and could make someone who is actually manipulative to feel that they get manipulated.
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Druid
I didn't recognize any of these tactics being used on or by me. But i still feel certain I am a manipulator. If it's a habit I have, then it's something I want to break. Though. I don't know if it would be good to break it because I generally want the happiest outcome
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I didn't recognize any of these tactics being used on or by me. But i still feel certain I am a manipulator. If it's a habit I have, then it's something I want to break. Though. I don't know if it would be good to break it because I generally want the happiest outcome
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psych2go
What I find funny/ironic is that everyone is chiming in with their experiences in this stuff, but offers no solutions or even care enough to help those who are doing these things. These are people too and might need help. Easier to hate and point fingers I guess
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What I find funny/ironic is that everyone is chiming in with their experiences in this stuff, but offers no solutions or even care enough to help those who are doing these things. These are people too and might need help. Easier to hate and point fingers I guess
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EvoEvan
Yep I have been emotionally manipulated by my ex-girlfriend (Which thankfully she's no longer part of my life anymore) and sometimes my father. This is why when I move on with my life, I am cutting people like my father off just like I did with my ex-girlfriend.
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Yep I have been emotionally manipulated by my ex-girlfriend (Which thankfully she's no longer part of my life anymore) and sometimes my father. This is why when I move on with my life, I am cutting people like my father off just like I did with my ex-girlfriend.
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WPC
Imagine having all these characteristics from trauma and being honest about it, then being told your a manipulator.
Stop boxing people. Think with heart and actions and move on when someone isnt honest with you or care how you are too.
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Imagine having all these characteristics from trauma and being honest about it, then being told your a manipulator.
Stop boxing people. Think with heart and actions and move on when someone isnt honest with you or care how you are too.
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Who_We_
True manipulators dont go out with the goal of making you feel crazy, they do what they have to under the radar to get something or someone. If you feel crazy as a result then that's not our problem, you're just too gullible
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True manipulators dont go out with the goal of making you feel crazy, they do what they have to under the radar to get something or someone. If you feel crazy as a result then that's not our problem, you're just too gullible
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Sir
I find using the truth is a lot better than pretending or lying to manipulate considering it creates less plot holes however just cause I'm saying this doesn't mean I manipulate I'm just sharing research
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I find using the truth is a lot better than pretending or lying to manipulate considering it creates less plot holes however just cause I'm saying this doesn't mean I manipulate I'm just sharing research
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Just
I already knew that my friends always used manipulative in their words while talking to get what they want from me but I still helping them cause I can't say 'no'. Is this a good behavior?
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I already knew that my friends always used manipulative in their words while talking to get what they want from me but I still helping them cause I can't say 'no'. Is this a good behavior?
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First
Manipulation is a very common trait honestly feel like its part of human nature or it could have been ingrained in are society. And like everything else it has its good side and bad side.
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Manipulation is a very common trait honestly feel like its part of human nature or it could have been ingrained in are society. And like everything else it has its good side and bad side.
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Pax
This just proves My theory that children are inherently manipulative In nature, due to their perceived weakness in society. They cant rely on strength or speed so they rely on these
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This just proves My theory that children are inherently manipulative In nature, due to their perceived weakness in society. They cant rely on strength or speed so they rely on these
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