8 Things You Should NEVER Say To Someone In Pain
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Date: 2023-08-20
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Comments and reviews: 25
education
damn that's exactly what my friends tell me. they're no longer my friends tho but they would tell me to stop overreacting or you're too sensitive my closest friend died from fatal gunshots last year and I got told you don't get to be sad over someone who couldn't be there for you so, then I started blaming myself for his death. constantly thinking that it was my fault he's dead. I also get nightmares of losing both my mom and my 12 year old brother and it'll repeat over and over again. I'd always think that my brother died from his epilepsy in his sleep and my mom stabbed herself.
I wanna stop having nightmares about it but I can't. I don't wanna be so depressed all the time. I don't wanna either constantly cry myself to sleep or drink. it's hurting me so much and my sleep schedule is very chaotic. :'( and its hard for me especially not being able to see my mom for ten years. this is my sixth year home with her.
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damn that's exactly what my friends tell me. they're no longer my friends tho but they would tell me to stop overreacting or you're too sensitive my closest friend died from fatal gunshots last year and I got told you don't get to be sad over someone who couldn't be there for you so, then I started blaming myself for his death. constantly thinking that it was my fault he's dead. I also get nightmares of losing both my mom and my 12 year old brother and it'll repeat over and over again. I'd always think that my brother died from his epilepsy in his sleep and my mom stabbed herself.
I wanna stop having nightmares about it but I can't. I don't wanna be so depressed all the time. I don't wanna either constantly cry myself to sleep or drink. it's hurting me so much and my sleep schedule is very chaotic. :'( and its hard for me especially not being able to see my mom for ten years. this is my sixth year home with her.
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WingDingfontbro
Just these 8 things are only examples of what hurts those who are hurting even more. Always try to make them feel accepted as if you can't find anything to say then try to say that you will always listen to them. When I was younger my parents always used the format of you shouldn't feel bad because you have x, y, z i think this was meant to signify what I had and that I shouldn't let such minimal things get me down but all I heard was you shouldn't feel this way. Instead of helping me it harmed me in a way that has lasted into many years into my maturity and because of those scars I have issues trusting people from small things like games or asking for help on work to telling others what is wrong out of a fear that they won t understand or care at all. In the end a lot of things can be taken in lota of different ways by people but often times it will be in a negative way.
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Just these 8 things are only examples of what hurts those who are hurting even more. Always try to make them feel accepted as if you can't find anything to say then try to say that you will always listen to them. When I was younger my parents always used the format of you shouldn't feel bad because you have x, y, z i think this was meant to signify what I had and that I shouldn't let such minimal things get me down but all I heard was you shouldn't feel this way. Instead of helping me it harmed me in a way that has lasted into many years into my maturity and because of those scars I have issues trusting people from small things like games or asking for help on work to telling others what is wrong out of a fear that they won t understand or care at all. In the end a lot of things can be taken in lota of different ways by people but often times it will be in a negative way.
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Kunaami
bruh basically all of these things have been said to me when i was suicidal, i still kinda am but i don't consider it as an option anymore. The one time i actually opened up to my mom about everything and started crying, she told me i was just being negative. She said that i should be grateful for all that i had. She told me that i'm strong enough to get through it, but i didn't feel strong! i didn't feel like everything was going to be ok. I didn't have any hope that things would ever get better. I've been struggling with this feeling for 5 years. I would have periods of feeling ok, only to fall back into a depressive state after a month or two. And all the build up pain over these years came out, only to be met with other people have it worse and look on the bright side It makes me feel awful.
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bruh basically all of these things have been said to me when i was suicidal, i still kinda am but i don't consider it as an option anymore. The one time i actually opened up to my mom about everything and started crying, she told me i was just being negative. She said that i should be grateful for all that i had. She told me that i'm strong enough to get through it, but i didn't feel strong! i didn't feel like everything was going to be ok. I didn't have any hope that things would ever get better. I've been struggling with this feeling for 5 years. I would have periods of feeling ok, only to fall back into a depressive state after a month or two. And all the build up pain over these years came out, only to be met with other people have it worse and look on the bright side It makes me feel awful.
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education
One thing I absolutely HATE is when people tell me that the things I have to do (wich are such a burden to me) are not that hard and really easy and not that much compared to their tasks and I'm just being lazy. Yes, I know I should have done my tasks a lot sooner and they may look small compared to other things, but to me they're impossible and saying that's not hard you should be able to do it! is NOT helping. It just make me feel even more like a failure for not being able to solve my easy work or not having the energy to do it. I know that's a poor excuse but I can't help it.
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One thing I absolutely HATE is when people tell me that the things I have to do (wich are such a burden to me) are not that hard and really easy and not that much compared to their tasks and I'm just being lazy. Yes, I know I should have done my tasks a lot sooner and they may look small compared to other things, but to me they're impossible and saying that's not hard you should be able to do it! is NOT helping. It just make me feel even more like a failure for not being able to solve my easy work or not having the energy to do it. I know that's a poor excuse but I can't help it.
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Sara_21
When ever someone calls me sensitive (Which is literally everyone I know, I get mad about it and then when they realized they messed up, instead of saying sorry, they just It was a joke, clam down! Seriously though, its not that bad. Me and other people have had it worse! Which is probably why I always think I need to act happy in front of my friends and family and I am afraid that they will take what I am sad about, and make me think that it is ridiculous. Especially my best friend. (I hope everyone is okay and learns something from this video! You matter, too)
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When ever someone calls me sensitive (Which is literally everyone I know, I get mad about it and then when they realized they messed up, instead of saying sorry, they just It was a joke, clam down! Seriously though, its not that bad. Me and other people have had it worse! Which is probably why I always think I need to act happy in front of my friends and family and I am afraid that they will take what I am sad about, and make me think that it is ridiculous. Especially my best friend. (I hope everyone is okay and learns something from this video! You matter, too)
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Ala
Thank you. However there is so much context in usage of these phrases. So depending on the situation, sometimes, these phrases can be helpful. Empathic listening is very important and also helping with suggestive open labelled questions to guide problem solving and emotional release like how do you feel? How would you react? What do you want to do? How can I help. Some of those phrases may come handy if the context is right.
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Thank you. However there is so much context in usage of these phrases. So depending on the situation, sometimes, these phrases can be helpful. Empathic listening is very important and also helping with suggestive open labelled questions to guide problem solving and emotional release like how do you feel? How would you react? What do you want to do? How can I help. Some of those phrases may come handy if the context is right.
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Bhumika
You're driving me crazy!
Weeping can't help you with that.
It is all according to God. You have to accept it.
Life is a puzzle. Solve it.
He is right or She said it totally right!
Life is not fair.
I am the. here! So, I am the one in charge!
Don't stay like this.
What to do? It's all the luck.
It's all nature's will
. are. (e. g. laws are laws.
Oh, here we go again.
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You're driving me crazy!
Weeping can't help you with that.
It is all according to God. You have to accept it.
Life is a puzzle. Solve it.
He is right or She said it totally right!
Life is not fair.
I am the. here! So, I am the one in charge!
Don't stay like this.
What to do? It's all the luck.
It's all nature's will
. are. (e. g. laws are laws.
Oh, here we go again.
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Brig
No not really people I hate judge mental judge people what we staying for here and now we are here to be the greatness in this world no its not its about enjoy life its about being happy greatness anybody thinks that decisions no its not people cannot change that people cannot tell you what to do so women can not tell you what to do no one can judge everyone where we stand for as a nation yes yesterday ass
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No not really people I hate judge mental judge people what we staying for here and now we are here to be the greatness in this world no its not its about enjoy life its about being happy greatness anybody thinks that decisions no its not people cannot change that people cannot tell you what to do so women can not tell you what to do no one can judge everyone where we stand for as a nation yes yesterday ass
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Eli
I just wanted to say somethin really quick, don't call us too sensitive, it's rude especially when some of us got sensitive souls, it gets hard dealing with other people's emotions, and when you tell us that it hurts us more than you realize, sensitive people are the ones who are willing to help and listen to anything at any time of day, we deserve respect and not to be picked on, leave a like if you agree
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I just wanted to say somethin really quick, don't call us too sensitive, it's rude especially when some of us got sensitive souls, it gets hard dealing with other people's emotions, and when you tell us that it hurts us more than you realize, sensitive people are the ones who are willing to help and listen to anything at any time of day, we deserve respect and not to be picked on, leave a like if you agree
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shadowguy321
This one drives me crazy, everybody has (insert problem here. I've heard this a lot, and every time I do, I can't help but think this means the person I'm speaking to is telling me that my problem is not a big problem and to stop being sad about it. On the one hand said phrase makes me not sad. on the other hand said phrase replaces my sadness with general anger
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This one drives me crazy, everybody has (insert problem here. I've heard this a lot, and every time I do, I can't help but think this means the person I'm speaking to is telling me that my problem is not a big problem and to stop being sad about it. On the one hand said phrase makes me not sad. on the other hand said phrase replaces my sadness with general anger
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MrSonoranbird
Now in the sunset of life, and having come through some very hard places, I recognize that ALL eight things mentioned in this video are indeed not what you want to say to someone that has experienced trauma of any kind, and are in emotional pain. I recognize them because most of those 8 things were said to me and felt like long, hot nails driven into my flesh.
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Now in the sunset of life, and having come through some very hard places, I recognize that ALL eight things mentioned in this video are indeed not what you want to say to someone that has experienced trauma of any kind, and are in emotional pain. I recognize them because most of those 8 things were said to me and felt like long, hot nails driven into my flesh.
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Sheren
Wow, here am I avoiding people for the sake of venting to something much more acceptable. A blank piece of paper. Sometimes when people get hurt they simply just get too tired of trying to make others understand because they feel that is hard for them to understand. But alas that's just my method of dealing with it.
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Wow, here am I avoiding people for the sake of venting to something much more acceptable. A blank piece of paper. Sometimes when people get hurt they simply just get too tired of trying to make others understand because they feel that is hard for them to understand. But alas that's just my method of dealing with it.
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oli
good thing i didn't say any of these things, if someone's friend/loved one died, i comfort them by saying they're loved one is still in their heart and never forgot them, they love you and they'll never forgot you either.
but i don't wanna assume their problems so i ask them first
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good thing i didn't say any of these things, if someone's friend/loved one died, i comfort them by saying they're loved one is still in their heart and never forgot them, they love you and they'll never forgot you either.
but i don't wanna assume their problems so i ask them first
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ashes
i have so many besties and the favourite one is MadyismeUwU i do anything for her but the only bestie that we always fight is rana not fight but like we turn crazy if we just texted each other Im planning on laughing at her when shes sad or in p1n but she never get sad with me uGh
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i have so many besties and the favourite one is MadyismeUwU i do anything for her but the only bestie that we always fight is rana not fight but like we turn crazy if we just texted each other Im planning on laughing at her when shes sad or in p1n but she never get sad with me uGh
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Evren
I'm struggling with something and my mom always says just to control my emotions every time I'm upset, now I'm scared to tell anyone because I feel like they might say something like this and cause me to feel even worse than I already feel. What should I do?
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I'm struggling with something and my mom always says just to control my emotions every time I'm upset, now I'm scared to tell anyone because I feel like they might say something like this and cause me to feel even worse than I already feel. What should I do?
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SonicKirbys
The first one actually hurt since me and my friend wanted to die (me in 6th grade, him earlier this year (around the end of school year) and my friends said that in the discord chat. So now i made a new chat called chat for the non toxic.
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The first one actually hurt since me and my friend wanted to die (me in 6th grade, him earlier this year (around the end of school year) and my friends said that in the discord chat. So now i made a new chat called chat for the non toxic.
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hena89
That is basically the combo, that really shouldn't be said to someone with a known history of abuse as a child, mid severe depression, attachment disorder and in present day severe depression / possibly something a lot worse.
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That is basically the combo, that really shouldn't be said to someone with a known history of abuse as a child, mid severe depression, attachment disorder and in present day severe depression / possibly something a lot worse.
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SoundOcean
One of my all time favourites:
You just want attention.
Well, yeah, SURPRISE, sometimes people who are hurting actually DO seek attention by stating how they feel, because they actually wholeheartedly need some.
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One of my all time favourites:
You just want attention.
Well, yeah, SURPRISE, sometimes people who are hurting actually DO seek attention by stating how they feel, because they actually wholeheartedly need some.
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ZokshiSepticBlood
In good ol home people I be slapping sad people and say
Snap out of it, I'm here for you and I won't leave until you heal you son of a shotgun
Yeah, that can make them quite laugh or kick the ship outta me.
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In good ol home people I be slapping sad people and say
Snap out of it, I'm here for you and I won't leave until you heal you son of a shotgun
Yeah, that can make them quite laugh or kick the ship outta me.
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Talking
I have told people to calm down, because they're being too sad or angry, so I want them to take a moment to breathe and tell me what they're going through or what I will tell them.
Looks like I messed up.
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I have told people to calm down, because they're being too sad or angry, so I want them to take a moment to breathe and tell me what they're going through or what I will tell them.
Looks like I messed up.
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Psych2Go
Happy Tuesday everyone! Many of you emailed us asking what are ways to comfort a friend. We decided to make this video. Hopefully, it helps! Comment below things that you say to a friend who's hurting.
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Happy Tuesday everyone! Many of you emailed us asking what are ways to comfort a friend. We decided to make this video. Hopefully, it helps! Comment below things that you say to a friend who's hurting.
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Bunny
My mom and other people throughout my life have said those exact words multiple times, I am dying inside now, this is the product of not doing these, I am so deep down the rabbit hole that I can't return
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My mom and other people throughout my life have said those exact words multiple times, I am dying inside now, this is the product of not doing these, I am so deep down the rabbit hole that I can't return
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Lauren
I wanna say something about when I told my family member about my suicidal behavior they just said oh let me get you a sharper knife! (they said this jokingly like I didn't mean it) What do I do?
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I wanna say something about when I told my family member about my suicidal behavior they just said oh let me get you a sharper knife! (they said this jokingly like I didn't mean it) What do I do?
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Jason
I know I say some of these things, but sometimes I have no idea how to react and comes out automatically, then realize either the minute I said it or reflect later my mistake, feeling bad.
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I know I say some of these things, but sometimes I have no idea how to react and comes out automatically, then realize either the minute I said it or reflect later my mistake, feeling bad.
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Elijah
I don't know why but I was very hurt when someone said that. I was better before and that Im just closing myself. I was told this since i was trying to heal from my self Isolation
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I don't know why but I was very hurt when someone said that. I was better before and that Im just closing myself. I was told this since i was trying to heal from my self Isolation
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