The Dark Side of High Achievers (DON'T DO THIS)
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Date: 2023-08-20
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Comments and reviews: 25
Nyna
I just got my final exam result yesterday, I won't get an A+ I will get an A and I am not satisfied with it because my parents set high standards for me it feels hard to tell them about my grades I feel extremely burnt out my parents keep on fighting every day so it makes things hard, I can't depend on them they also have the same share of problems. My parents make me feel worthless for getting an A. I also want to enjoy my childhood like others going to parties having fun etc. People slowly stopped calling me for birthdays as I won't go anyway. I am fat so I am insecure that people may point it out, I wanted to become something related to law but my mom pushes me to be a doctor. BTS are the only people who have cheered me up in my hard times and my mom asks me to stop stanning BTS because she thinks it is a distraction. I am turning 14 this July. Am I victimizing myself or is this really toxic? Just because I am young they think I won't have mental health issues.
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I just got my final exam result yesterday, I won't get an A+ I will get an A and I am not satisfied with it because my parents set high standards for me it feels hard to tell them about my grades I feel extremely burnt out my parents keep on fighting every day so it makes things hard, I can't depend on them they also have the same share of problems. My parents make me feel worthless for getting an A. I also want to enjoy my childhood like others going to parties having fun etc. People slowly stopped calling me for birthdays as I won't go anyway. I am fat so I am insecure that people may point it out, I wanted to become something related to law but my mom pushes me to be a doctor. BTS are the only people who have cheered me up in my hard times and my mom asks me to stop stanning BTS because she thinks it is a distraction. I am turning 14 this July. Am I victimizing myself or is this really toxic? Just because I am young they think I won't have mental health issues.
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omalga
Hello a high achiever there. Im a human of big ideas and Im making them real.
Many things from this video opened my eyes especially about why its good to work in group sometimes. Still I feel like a group project will get the Lover grade because I work with people who cant meet my work standards, but I dont want to Force them into working my way (because I know the topic better) too because my low self esteem tells me that I shouldnt play the boss role because they will hate me.
I love the one about importance of free time and not overworking ourselves. Its my big problem, lately I found out that everything I do is supposed to teach me smth. For example this video was for better understending of myself. I dont watch many chilled things to just relax. Or I feel guilty when I dont work enough at a day.
Also when I heard that others make mistakes too I feel soooo relieved, I realised that Im not alone.
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Hello a high achiever there. Im a human of big ideas and Im making them real.
Many things from this video opened my eyes especially about why its good to work in group sometimes. Still I feel like a group project will get the Lover grade because I work with people who cant meet my work standards, but I dont want to Force them into working my way (because I know the topic better) too because my low self esteem tells me that I shouldnt play the boss role because they will hate me.
I love the one about importance of free time and not overworking ourselves. Its my big problem, lately I found out that everything I do is supposed to teach me smth. For example this video was for better understending of myself. I dont watch many chilled things to just relax. Or I feel guilty when I dont work enough at a day.
Also when I heard that others make mistakes too I feel soooo relieved, I realised that Im not alone.
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Watermelon
I was looking for a psych2go video about high achievers! I am one of them, actually. In my class, I am the quiet kid that gets the highest grades. But sadly, I am quiet because I am trying to recover from social anxiety, which also makes me a people pleaser. Sometimes I am still afraid of saying no to my classmates when they ask for answers to a question (especially when they insist. I am still learning that I do not need to be afraid of people/being afraid of talking to people. My biggest goal that I aspire to achieve is to be good at socializing again. My nature is being an extrovert, but thanks to the quarantine and to the bullying I suffered years ago, both of these made me really insecure about myself and only made me more scared of being judged by people. I really wish I could socialize, but I'm gonna start to take meds for social anxiety I think next month, I can't wait to see the results!
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I was looking for a psych2go video about high achievers! I am one of them, actually. In my class, I am the quiet kid that gets the highest grades. But sadly, I am quiet because I am trying to recover from social anxiety, which also makes me a people pleaser. Sometimes I am still afraid of saying no to my classmates when they ask for answers to a question (especially when they insist. I am still learning that I do not need to be afraid of people/being afraid of talking to people. My biggest goal that I aspire to achieve is to be good at socializing again. My nature is being an extrovert, but thanks to the quarantine and to the bullying I suffered years ago, both of these made me really insecure about myself and only made me more scared of being judged by people. I really wish I could socialize, but I'm gonna start to take meds for social anxiety I think next month, I can't wait to see the results!
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Grace
I had my burnt out experience just few months ago. The thing is, eventhough I do all these things, I rarely get decent scores, no matter how hard I try. Maybe because I studied in a prestigious school and everyone was expected to more capable, but it made my self esteem really go downhill.
It became so bad I had to check my condition to a psychiatrists and he gave me some fluoxetine and olanzapine to take.
For the school, well. I transferred. It was very hard, I cried many times. I had my goal and that was to finish school in that school, and it was all ruined. But I think it's for the better that I got out, I'm now more relaxed in my new school. Although I got most of the responsibilities here, it wouldn't compare to the pressure that I've experienced the time when I was still studying in my previous school.
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I had my burnt out experience just few months ago. The thing is, eventhough I do all these things, I rarely get decent scores, no matter how hard I try. Maybe because I studied in a prestigious school and everyone was expected to more capable, but it made my self esteem really go downhill.
It became so bad I had to check my condition to a psychiatrists and he gave me some fluoxetine and olanzapine to take.
For the school, well. I transferred. It was very hard, I cried many times. I had my goal and that was to finish school in that school, and it was all ruined. But I think it's for the better that I got out, I'm now more relaxed in my new school. Although I got most of the responsibilities here, it wouldn't compare to the pressure that I've experienced the time when I was still studying in my previous school.
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Wendy
My dad is a high achiever, and passed on high expectations to his children. My sister is doing well, through many struggles. My brother is at a low point due to mental illness that has put him at odds with the rest of the family (except my sister, who has been a godsend through all of this. I sustained a traumatic brain injury at age 15, so I also have mental struggles, though it also inspired me to achieve more than I ever would have without those challenges. One thing that has helped me through the last 3 decades is to remember that practice may not make perfect, though it does make better, and usually means progress. No, I am not the best I could be, I don't even try to compare myself to anyone else (anymore, though improvement is my constant goal. Thank you, Psych2Go, for helping me in that journey!
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My dad is a high achiever, and passed on high expectations to his children. My sister is doing well, through many struggles. My brother is at a low point due to mental illness that has put him at odds with the rest of the family (except my sister, who has been a godsend through all of this. I sustained a traumatic brain injury at age 15, so I also have mental struggles, though it also inspired me to achieve more than I ever would have without those challenges. One thing that has helped me through the last 3 decades is to remember that practice may not make perfect, though it does make better, and usually means progress. No, I am not the best I could be, I don't even try to compare myself to anyone else (anymore, though improvement is my constant goal. Thank you, Psych2Go, for helping me in that journey!
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IceWolf
Im a very high achiever! But at the same time if I dont always reach the high standards I give myself I understand Im only human and my standards are often my ideal of what Im aiming for. But I understand that I wont always reach that. at first. But Im also extremely persistent and if I fall short of my standards I will stop at nothing until I get myself to where I wanna be. One of my favorite sayings is I never lose. Either I win or I learn!
However, the only point I actually can relate to in this video is the last one about neglecting self care in order to keep working. BUT since Im very much aware of this habit Ive recently been working on it to improve. To help, I began setting goals for my physical health so now I have standards for that too XD I do love ma golden goals: 3
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Im a very high achiever! But at the same time if I dont always reach the high standards I give myself I understand Im only human and my standards are often my ideal of what Im aiming for. But I understand that I wont always reach that. at first. But Im also extremely persistent and if I fall short of my standards I will stop at nothing until I get myself to where I wanna be. One of my favorite sayings is I never lose. Either I win or I learn!
However, the only point I actually can relate to in this video is the last one about neglecting self care in order to keep working. BUT since Im very much aware of this habit Ive recently been working on it to improve. To help, I began setting goals for my physical health so now I have standards for that too XD I do love ma golden goals: 3
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Syafiqa
So my last year final exam's results have an improvement yet its wasn't a great result ( in my opinion. It's been a long time since I've got a C in any subject before and yet this time, huh I got C in my Geography which is something that I unexpected at all. I find myself hard to coping with this as I personally have high expectations on myself. Well not only me but my mother too tbh. Then, I felt like I didn't study enough though I know that I frequently wake up at 4 am to study etc. Yet, I somehow felt guilty ( idk how to express this tho. Well the reason why I feel there's an improvement where I finally get 6A which back then I only get 3A or something like that. So I guess this year need to struggle more.
sorry if there's any grammar error etc, thank you
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So my last year final exam's results have an improvement yet its wasn't a great result ( in my opinion. It's been a long time since I've got a C in any subject before and yet this time, huh I got C in my Geography which is something that I unexpected at all. I find myself hard to coping with this as I personally have high expectations on myself. Well not only me but my mother too tbh. Then, I felt like I didn't study enough though I know that I frequently wake up at 4 am to study etc. Yet, I somehow felt guilty ( idk how to express this tho. Well the reason why I feel there's an improvement where I finally get 6A which back then I only get 3A or something like that. So I guess this year need to struggle more.
sorry if there's any grammar error etc, thank you
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TDot
At one point I would say I was a high achiever. From grade school to first year of uni I was essentially a straight A student. 1 failed class in my 2nd year and Ive sort of been on a downward spiral since. With that being said, exploring what Im passionate about has helped me a lot recently. And for me thats cooking and the outdoors. Ive learned that while chasing achievements and praise from others makes me feel good, it is important to prioritize things that dont necessarily feel like work in order to help me stay grounded.
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At one point I would say I was a high achiever. From grade school to first year of uni I was essentially a straight A student. 1 failed class in my 2nd year and Ive sort of been on a downward spiral since. With that being said, exploring what Im passionate about has helped me a lot recently. And for me thats cooking and the outdoors. Ive learned that while chasing achievements and praise from others makes me feel good, it is important to prioritize things that dont necessarily feel like work in order to help me stay grounded.
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Dr.
There are still a lot of instances, Present Day, where I feel insignificant if not perfect. It's not too bad, if you don't expect to do all that well to begin with. It's more when you pour your heart into something, and it doesn't meet the standard. It's eaten away at me for years, and the feeling is beyond degrading. Over the years, I've learned better not to care about what other people say to what I do. Unless what I'm doing is genuinely horrible. It's how I see myself that hasn't really improved much.
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There are still a lot of instances, Present Day, where I feel insignificant if not perfect. It's not too bad, if you don't expect to do all that well to begin with. It's more when you pour your heart into something, and it doesn't meet the standard. It's eaten away at me for years, and the feeling is beyond degrading. Over the years, I've learned better not to care about what other people say to what I do. Unless what I'm doing is genuinely horrible. It's how I see myself that hasn't really improved much.
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Amity
See this is why I relate to high achiever, dont you see? Baby, nothing comes for free. They say Im a control freak driven by a greed to succeed, nobody can stop me cause its my problem if I wanna pack up and run away, [its my business if I feel the need to smoke and drink and swear, ] its my problem, its my problem if I feel the need to hide, and its my problem if I have no friends and feel I want to d! e. I dont relate to the substance abuse (unless stress/comfort eating constantly counts) but yeah lol
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See this is why I relate to high achiever, dont you see? Baby, nothing comes for free. They say Im a control freak driven by a greed to succeed, nobody can stop me cause its my problem if I wanna pack up and run away, [its my business if I feel the need to smoke and drink and swear, ] its my problem, its my problem if I feel the need to hide, and its my problem if I have no friends and feel I want to d! e. I dont relate to the substance abuse (unless stress/comfort eating constantly counts) but yeah lol
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Not
I am the biggest high achiever I know, my lowest grade was an 8/10 and I cried and cried for getting it, I only feel satisfied when I get a 10/10, a 9, 50/10 is not enough, I try hard everytime and still think I can do better!
Sometimes I just want to take care of sheeps and be happy with itI feel like I want to change but not much, just enough to not stress, I'll try to do something to get better but not be stressed, any tips?
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I am the biggest high achiever I know, my lowest grade was an 8/10 and I cried and cried for getting it, I only feel satisfied when I get a 10/10, a 9, 50/10 is not enough, I try hard everytime and still think I can do better!
Sometimes I just want to take care of sheeps and be happy with itI feel like I want to change but not much, just enough to not stress, I'll try to do something to get better but not be stressed, any tips?
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DurT
What about unrealized potential, I was always content with just rolling out of bed a getting an A, so why put forth so much extra effort for an A+, graduated college without ever really studying while working over 40 hours a week at a restaurant, just coasting through life of of natural abilitynow Im 36 with a bs call center job and ruminating on how Ive never actually tried at anything, I guess we reap what we sow
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What about unrealized potential, I was always content with just rolling out of bed a getting an A, so why put forth so much extra effort for an A+, graduated college without ever really studying while working over 40 hours a week at a restaurant, just coasting through life of of natural abilitynow Im 36 with a bs call center job and ruminating on how Ive never actually tried at anything, I guess we reap what we sow
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Bas
Definitely! I'm actually already too far gone now to ever fully recover. I've had a mental breakdown (kept on going even after I've already gotten a burnout) almost 3 years ago, and I still feel the effects of it. I've become more sensitive to things that I'm already more sensitive to than the normal/average person, and burn (no pun intended) through my energy faster than before.
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Definitely! I'm actually already too far gone now to ever fully recover. I've had a mental breakdown (kept on going even after I've already gotten a burnout) almost 3 years ago, and I still feel the effects of it. I've become more sensitive to things that I'm already more sensitive to than the normal/average person, and burn (no pun intended) through my energy faster than before.
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zeraephimic
Yes, I find it hard to say No.
Yes, I'm extremely independent, not good at asking for help.
No, I'm not perfectionist but I do feel terrible for my bad results. I don't work hard for studies at all.
Yes, I'm highly self-critical.
Yes, I neglect self care even my parents don't give a damn about me.
But no, I'm not a high achiever, I'm a failure
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Yes, I find it hard to say No.
Yes, I'm extremely independent, not good at asking for help.
No, I'm not perfectionist but I do feel terrible for my bad results. I don't work hard for studies at all.
Yes, I'm highly self-critical.
Yes, I neglect self care even my parents don't give a damn about me.
But no, I'm not a high achiever, I'm a failure
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Koi
Are used to be a high achiever than I stopped since I dont wanna be put on the spotlight so stopped doing everything and not caring about what I do because I realized that no ones gonna notice you and you can finally get mad at the teachers for giving you unreasonable stuff then scream at them instead or give them the middle finger silently honestly way more satisfying
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Are used to be a high achiever than I stopped since I dont wanna be put on the spotlight so stopped doing everything and not caring about what I do because I realized that no ones gonna notice you and you can finally get mad at the teachers for giving you unreasonable stuff then scream at them instead or give them the middle finger silently honestly way more satisfying
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olivia
I used to be a high achiever, and I still feel guilty for saying no to things when I usually say yes, especially since the help I gave was simply giving them answers or doing it for them, but I saw how tiring it was to keep doing it, also how much work I had to complete because I was helping someone else, and I stopped, which was a great thing for me.
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I used to be a high achiever, and I still feel guilty for saying no to things when I usually say yes, especially since the help I gave was simply giving them answers or doing it for them, but I saw how tiring it was to keep doing it, also how much work I had to complete because I was helping someone else, and I stopped, which was a great thing for me.
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milo!
I relate to this a lot. I have a hard time asking for help, and as an artist I'm always taking on every commission I get, and often get burnt out. my parents never pushed me to get good grades but I make a big deal out of it every time I get bad grades on something and I hate how hard I am on myself and yet u still feel like I'm not doing enough
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I relate to this a lot. I have a hard time asking for help, and as an artist I'm always taking on every commission I get, and often get burnt out. my parents never pushed me to get good grades but I make a big deal out of it every time I get bad grades on something and I hate how hard I am on myself and yet u still feel like I'm not doing enough
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Amxr
I used to be a high achiever but now i started failing alot because I've literally lost all my motivation in everything i sometimes even lose hope in life because im so burnt out and can't literally can't even imagine studying anymore i barely force my self to read for an exam i feel like dying everytime i try to study i feel nonhuman anymore
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I used to be a high achiever but now i started failing alot because I've literally lost all my motivation in everything i sometimes even lose hope in life because im so burnt out and can't literally can't even imagine studying anymore i barely force my self to read for an exam i feel like dying everytime i try to study i feel nonhuman anymore
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28. Nguyen
I think I am neglecting self care. I always put my goals on the top priority over my family and favorite stuff. And if I take a day off or doing my favorite things, I always feel guilty. I just work and work until I burn out. After this video, i know a lot about myself and I figure that I am such a high achiever. What should I do?
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I think I am neglecting self care. I always put my goals on the top priority over my family and favorite stuff. And if I take a day off or doing my favorite things, I always feel guilty. I just work and work until I burn out. After this video, i know a lot about myself and I figure that I am such a high achiever. What should I do?
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Snowy
what if my goal is to help everyone single person on earth, even all other species even helping the earth its self. Help people to understand what was misunderstood and to help people to understand the future and the past. To be there for people when they are in there lowest lows no matter who they are what they have done.
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what if my goal is to help everyone single person on earth, even all other species even helping the earth its self. Help people to understand what was misunderstood and to help people to understand the future and the past. To be there for people when they are in there lowest lows no matter who they are what they have done.
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12ken
I was a valedictorian at my university, and got a masters degree in physics at a prestigious school, I ended up not good at anything else than getting good grades, and now i can't even manage a pizza delivery job lol the fall was so great feels like my life is pretty much over. I'll probably become homeless at any moment.
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I was a valedictorian at my university, and got a masters degree in physics at a prestigious school, I ended up not good at anything else than getting good grades, and now i can't even manage a pizza delivery job lol the fall was so great feels like my life is pretty much over. I'll probably become homeless at any moment.
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EeveeBest11
I relate a lot to 3 of these, and quite a bit to a 4th one. But I know I can say no.
I don't give myself a break, fun games are just more work to success, I need to get an A a B isn't good enough, I make so many mistakes. I hate working with others. Watching this video, I'm a High Achiever and I know it.
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I relate a lot to 3 of these, and quite a bit to a 4th one. But I know I can say no.
I don't give myself a break, fun games are just more work to success, I need to get an A a B isn't good enough, I make so many mistakes. I hate working with others. Watching this video, I'm a High Achiever and I know it.
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education
Well, unfortunately I released too late, its been two years now since I stopped accepting complements, I keep focusing on my mistakes and failures, I feel like Im toxic to my friends because I keep complaining about my anxiety and communication anxiety, Im so tired, I reached a point to hate my self
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Well, unfortunately I released too late, its been two years now since I stopped accepting complements, I keep focusing on my mistakes and failures, I feel like Im toxic to my friends because I keep complaining about my anxiety and communication anxiety, Im so tired, I reached a point to hate my self
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Mememaker
1. Yes
2. ?
3. Double yes
4. Yes
5. Yes
A few 'bonuses'
I don't find many things fun that I used to.
I am really struggling in english.
I cry at unnecessary times sometimes.
I can't do things people my age probably can do.
Do you know what's wrong?
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1. Yes
2. ?
3. Double yes
4. Yes
5. Yes
A few 'bonuses'
I don't find many things fun that I used to.
I am really struggling in english.
I cry at unnecessary times sometimes.
I can't do things people my age probably can do.
Do you know what's wrong?
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Shawn
I am a high achiever. I have accomplished many things, but it never feels like its enough. I feel like I need to do something society- altering to prove myself. I'm still working on accepting myself for who I am. It is a relief to know others feel the same way.
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I am a high achiever. I have accomplished many things, but it never feels like its enough. I feel like I need to do something society- altering to prove myself. I'm still working on accepting myself for who I am. It is a relief to know others feel the same way.
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