5 Signs You Have a Wounded Inner Child (How to Heal)
video description
Date: 2023-08-20
Related videos
• TED-Ed
Comments and reviews: 25
Lindsay
The missing father id like to get ny dna since i spent ny life believing an irishman in my infant yrs was my dad though didnt aknowkedge me unless i pushed in with my youngrst sisters attention who was daying what about me ehat about me. He had no remorse as adultsand our mother had divorced he hot word via my brother to me that hed asked to get word to my younger sister hed like to see heri told her but at that point rrakisrd so much and knew i didnt belong, as a school teen my mum told i should have had you adopted as a child when advised too. my eldest sister told me in my mifddle 50, s my dad was a polish canadian pilot who was stationed in the send area of surrey during the war. mum denied though i explained no reason on my part other than finding out the cultural wonder she instisted theee truth dird with her, though my blood type the rarist whwre as my other siblings arent. I was the middle one so always had the jobs the worries or mums sob sad storirs told to me, that ess the only communication i got about ny errands and my youngrstand mothers much loved sisterr eas reffered to ma aleays as poor Bridget take her with you ill never know why she was poor Bridget. though i always took care of her as felt i had toowe were close adults. My lovely auntonce reokied when i asked her for the Irish dads (so i thought at this time ) daid my mothers place to tell me however she did, i callrd his number a lady answered i explained she went away and came back and told me he cant as he had his new family now. End nothg more or less except ut was proof he used to see my brother since an infant age, and asked to see my younger sister when an adult. i didnt really need my mums confurvation but would have been. lovely to have had the chance to see my real Father. Bruno is the only link and the polish Canadian pilot in uk war time. yes i do feel another spiteful move from my late mum.
reply
The missing father id like to get ny dna since i spent ny life believing an irishman in my infant yrs was my dad though didnt aknowkedge me unless i pushed in with my youngrst sisters attention who was daying what about me ehat about me. He had no remorse as adultsand our mother had divorced he hot word via my brother to me that hed asked to get word to my younger sister hed like to see heri told her but at that point rrakisrd so much and knew i didnt belong, as a school teen my mum told i should have had you adopted as a child when advised too. my eldest sister told me in my mifddle 50, s my dad was a polish canadian pilot who was stationed in the send area of surrey during the war. mum denied though i explained no reason on my part other than finding out the cultural wonder she instisted theee truth dird with her, though my blood type the rarist whwre as my other siblings arent. I was the middle one so always had the jobs the worries or mums sob sad storirs told to me, that ess the only communication i got about ny errands and my youngrstand mothers much loved sisterr eas reffered to ma aleays as poor Bridget take her with you ill never know why she was poor Bridget. though i always took care of her as felt i had toowe were close adults. My lovely auntonce reokied when i asked her for the Irish dads (so i thought at this time ) daid my mothers place to tell me however she did, i callrd his number a lady answered i explained she went away and came back and told me he cant as he had his new family now. End nothg more or less except ut was proof he used to see my brother since an infant age, and asked to see my younger sister when an adult. i didnt really need my mums confurvation but would have been. lovely to have had the chance to see my real Father. Bruno is the only link and the polish Canadian pilot in uk war time. yes i do feel another spiteful move from my late mum.
reply
Kyle
The only way I can live my life is as a husk with no inner child to speak of. There used to be an inner child but then he was mistreated and misunderstood by everyone around him and punished by his parents for reacting out of emotional distress because it looked like he was having a tantrum but really just couldnt say anything. He was forced to accept the abuse of everyone until he was found dead. He had his brains shotgun blasted so he couldnt get an open casket at the funeral. I didnt even show up. Im an adult now I just want him to be here with me. Im sorry I was never there for you. I just want to close my eyes and see you sitting next to me when I open them. I wish I was there with you. I wish I went to the funeral. My sister tells me hes still alive, hiding under my bed but Im never able to see or hear him. If youre still alive, please come out. Youre safe now. Nobody wants to hurt you anymore, if fact youd be amazed how many people want to see you, be your friend. I want to be your friend. I want to ride bikes with you. I want to eat snacks and play video games, go swimming, traverse through those woods in the backyard of moms house and see if the abandoned shopping cart is still there. Its amazing mom hasnt abandoned me yet. Ive hurt her so much and so badly that I honestly dont understand why she still loves me. Im nothing without you! You were the thing that gave my life purpose. I just want you to be ok so that I can be okay. I know thats not the healthiest thing in the world but its not like I know anything else. I wish I could be with you to give you what I was never given as a kid because it doesnt get any better when youre an adult.
reply
The only way I can live my life is as a husk with no inner child to speak of. There used to be an inner child but then he was mistreated and misunderstood by everyone around him and punished by his parents for reacting out of emotional distress because it looked like he was having a tantrum but really just couldnt say anything. He was forced to accept the abuse of everyone until he was found dead. He had his brains shotgun blasted so he couldnt get an open casket at the funeral. I didnt even show up. Im an adult now I just want him to be here with me. Im sorry I was never there for you. I just want to close my eyes and see you sitting next to me when I open them. I wish I was there with you. I wish I went to the funeral. My sister tells me hes still alive, hiding under my bed but Im never able to see or hear him. If youre still alive, please come out. Youre safe now. Nobody wants to hurt you anymore, if fact youd be amazed how many people want to see you, be your friend. I want to be your friend. I want to ride bikes with you. I want to eat snacks and play video games, go swimming, traverse through those woods in the backyard of moms house and see if the abandoned shopping cart is still there. Its amazing mom hasnt abandoned me yet. Ive hurt her so much and so badly that I honestly dont understand why she still loves me. Im nothing without you! You were the thing that gave my life purpose. I just want you to be ok so that I can be okay. I know thats not the healthiest thing in the world but its not like I know anything else. I wish I could be with you to give you what I was never given as a kid because it doesnt get any better when youre an adult.
reply
Princess
Undoubtedly and without the shadow of a doubt, my inner child was wounded beyond all recognition. My dad, a casebook Jekyll & Hyde mentally who was also a narcissist. He abused our entire family and abused me in every way a person could be abused.
I tested high mentally pre nursery. Actually my sister and I both did. But both of us were continually compared to each other. And I was often punished when I wasn't being a good example to my sister either behaviorally or accademically. Or both. Yay! Fun times at our house. We were taught to suppress our emotions and discomfort. hide it if we had a cold and such. And so we functioned as a family until he decided to leave us for another woman. She's actually a good stepmom and didn't allow him to get away with the stuff my mom never felt she had the choice to.
The problem I'd been dealing with the most was trying to step forward away from the past and become more than just a survivor. I think this will really help me to finally heal.
Thank you so much for this new patch of Yellow Brick Road I've been Ease'n on Down. The Road. And thank you for that glimpse of the Rainbow that might be out there for me
reply
Undoubtedly and without the shadow of a doubt, my inner child was wounded beyond all recognition. My dad, a casebook Jekyll & Hyde mentally who was also a narcissist. He abused our entire family and abused me in every way a person could be abused.
I tested high mentally pre nursery. Actually my sister and I both did. But both of us were continually compared to each other. And I was often punished when I wasn't being a good example to my sister either behaviorally or accademically. Or both. Yay! Fun times at our house. We were taught to suppress our emotions and discomfort. hide it if we had a cold and such. And so we functioned as a family until he decided to leave us for another woman. She's actually a good stepmom and didn't allow him to get away with the stuff my mom never felt she had the choice to.
The problem I'd been dealing with the most was trying to step forward away from the past and become more than just a survivor. I think this will really help me to finally heal.
Thank you so much for this new patch of Yellow Brick Road I've been Ease'n on Down. The Road. And thank you for that glimpse of the Rainbow that might be out there for me
reply
WilczycaCzarownica
About the letter of forgiveness. I would wrote a letter to my old peers who hurst me. Even for my grandma who wasn't good at my mother, but I don't think I wrote letter to my father. I didn't know, but he hurted me more than my peers. After my parents divorced he wasn't interested to spend time with me or my brother after that. After for many years he found my brother and he wanted from him money. He didn't want to fix relationship with him. He also didn't believed that I can achieve something like finish the college with I done. I'm even hate jokes father protecting daughter how help some kind of weapon, because I see them as evil, heartless moster, not a loving and compassion parent. I've never felt how's be to be loved by dad. Also I have a hard time with my brother who didn't communicate with me and my mom. Only a few time in whole years with isn't much. And in trying time he didn't help us. He even didn't support us by just talking to us if we are ok and if we need his help. Last time when we saw each other he tell names to my mother that wasn't true and he hurt both of us.
reply
About the letter of forgiveness. I would wrote a letter to my old peers who hurst me. Even for my grandma who wasn't good at my mother, but I don't think I wrote letter to my father. I didn't know, but he hurted me more than my peers. After my parents divorced he wasn't interested to spend time with me or my brother after that. After for many years he found my brother and he wanted from him money. He didn't want to fix relationship with him. He also didn't believed that I can achieve something like finish the college with I done. I'm even hate jokes father protecting daughter how help some kind of weapon, because I see them as evil, heartless moster, not a loving and compassion parent. I've never felt how's be to be loved by dad. Also I have a hard time with my brother who didn't communicate with me and my mom. Only a few time in whole years with isn't much. And in trying time he didn't help us. He even didn't support us by just talking to us if we are ok and if we need his help. Last time when we saw each other he tell names to my mother that wasn't true and he hurt both of us.
reply
kaleyjoplinRAWRR
Ive also connected with the story of Rapunzel and Tangled. My parents were narcissists and were controlling and overbearing. They didnt let me hang out with friends or even family so as an only child I often felt like my room was my tower. Having adhd, my mom often made comments about me not being able to stand on my own. I struggle now with isolating myself whenever Im down or struggling. Its bittersweet bc I do like my space as an introvert but I often feel lonely as well. Loneliness is something I know too well. Currently in the process of escaping my tower and breaking free but its scary as hell
reply
Ive also connected with the story of Rapunzel and Tangled. My parents were narcissists and were controlling and overbearing. They didnt let me hang out with friends or even family so as an only child I often felt like my room was my tower. Having adhd, my mom often made comments about me not being able to stand on my own. I struggle now with isolating myself whenever Im down or struggling. Its bittersweet bc I do like my space as an introvert but I often feel lonely as well. Loneliness is something I know too well. Currently in the process of escaping my tower and breaking free but its scary as hell
reply
Christine
Sometimes, the best way to care for your inner child (& your inner teen & your inner young adult) is to get the heck away. I left my parents house at 19, moved across the country, and never went back. Even when my mother finally reached out to me, I didnt go back. I talked to her on the phone once a week, sent cards and gifts for birthdays and major holidays, but still stayed as far as I could without leaving the country. I got counseling, got married, had my child, and followed the advice my counselor and parenting classes. Now Im 69, my daughter is 35, and we are did fine & continuing fine.
reply
Sometimes, the best way to care for your inner child (& your inner teen & your inner young adult) is to get the heck away. I left my parents house at 19, moved across the country, and never went back. Even when my mother finally reached out to me, I didnt go back. I talked to her on the phone once a week, sent cards and gifts for birthdays and major holidays, but still stayed as far as I could without leaving the country. I got counseling, got married, had my child, and followed the advice my counselor and parenting classes. Now Im 69, my daughter is 35, and we are did fine & continuing fine.
reply
Wind_Cursed
I dislike it so much when people focus so much on trauma or a wounded inner child is all about how your parents treated you, because FOR ME that simply is not true. Maybe it's true for everyone else, but my parents are truly wonderful and have done nothing to hurt me. They've only tried to help me. See, the reason I had trauma and a wounded inner child is because I let my anxiety run wild. My anxiety is my biggest and only bully and narcissist and everything like that. Nothing caused my anxiety either, it's just been there since birth, and my careful attributes feed it even more
reply
I dislike it so much when people focus so much on trauma or a wounded inner child is all about how your parents treated you, because FOR ME that simply is not true. Maybe it's true for everyone else, but my parents are truly wonderful and have done nothing to hurt me. They've only tried to help me. See, the reason I had trauma and a wounded inner child is because I let my anxiety run wild. My anxiety is my biggest and only bully and narcissist and everything like that. Nothing caused my anxiety either, it's just been there since birth, and my careful attributes feed it even more
reply
RictorIAG
I hate so many of these recommendations. The first one -- parent yourself! No shit sherlock. That's why I have an attachment avoidant style. It's what I've had to do my whole life. Write a forgiveness letter! Yes, now that my parents aren't parents and they've successfully let me replace them by parenting myself, let me write them a letter and tell them that it's really okay! Swear it!
This is the worst video with the absolute worst advice possible in it. This is what it looks like when therapists collude with abusers.
reply
I hate so many of these recommendations. The first one -- parent yourself! No shit sherlock. That's why I have an attachment avoidant style. It's what I've had to do my whole life. Write a forgiveness letter! Yes, now that my parents aren't parents and they've successfully let me replace them by parenting myself, let me write them a letter and tell them that it's really okay! Swear it!
This is the worst video with the absolute worst advice possible in it. This is what it looks like when therapists collude with abusers.
reply
Joju
I'm only 28 years old, and I feel like I'm on the cusp of losing my youth and begrudgingly accepting becoming old.
I'm supposed to be a mature, independent adult, but the little kid in me was never really loved, so he's afraid of the entire world.
I don't know if my parents did the best job they could've, but i grew up with much difficulty and traumatic situations. Eventually, the longer you keep it bottled up, the more it'll hurt as you get older because you've never allowed yourself to heal.
reply
I'm only 28 years old, and I feel like I'm on the cusp of losing my youth and begrudgingly accepting becoming old.
I'm supposed to be a mature, independent adult, but the little kid in me was never really loved, so he's afraid of the entire world.
I don't know if my parents did the best job they could've, but i grew up with much difficulty and traumatic situations. Eventually, the longer you keep it bottled up, the more it'll hurt as you get older because you've never allowed yourself to heal.
reply
Michelle
I definitely have a wounded child. I was told years ago that I was too old for my Barbies. I eventually had to sneak them out but kept pushing them away during most parts of my life. I finally accepted that I truly love them because I love to do things with them. They ground me and take the edge off in the anxiety that I might be feeling. I now have some Barbies again. And I'm being mindful by making things for them. I have felt way better since then. I called them my coping girls.
reply
I definitely have a wounded child. I was told years ago that I was too old for my Barbies. I eventually had to sneak them out but kept pushing them away during most parts of my life. I finally accepted that I truly love them because I love to do things with them. They ground me and take the edge off in the anxiety that I might be feeling. I now have some Barbies again. And I'm being mindful by making things for them. I have felt way better since then. I called them my coping girls.
reply
Yucky_Hamsandwich
I know I have a lot of those and I have tried many therapists. Is hard to find one that connects with me, one of them felt I was too old to hang on to some of the wound because I now have life experiences. Now that I have children pay for a therapist is just too much. Honestly I have much better conversation with older people who are strangers than a therapists. I don't know if I can ever heal some of my pain but I will try my best. Thank you for the video.
reply
I know I have a lot of those and I have tried many therapists. Is hard to find one that connects with me, one of them felt I was too old to hang on to some of the wound because I now have life experiences. Now that I have children pay for a therapist is just too much. Honestly I have much better conversation with older people who are strangers than a therapists. I don't know if I can ever heal some of my pain but I will try my best. Thank you for the video.
reply
Dan-
i couldnt figure out what it was causing me to fall into an abyss of grief. Seeing myself now still sees the kid i used to be, happy and innocent with dreams. now my experiences of the past has seem to wounded that child that my guardian resides within a demonic entity to take control how i act. this is an ongoing thing in my life that i need to get resolved and finally let that inner child pass on to the next life and leave things to the grown up version he become.
reply
i couldnt figure out what it was causing me to fall into an abyss of grief. Seeing myself now still sees the kid i used to be, happy and innocent with dreams. now my experiences of the past has seem to wounded that child that my guardian resides within a demonic entity to take control how i act. this is an ongoing thing in my life that i need to get resolved and finally let that inner child pass on to the next life and leave things to the grown up version he become.
reply
Amy
My inner child has always been insecure and slow to come out of her shell, along with having some self-inflicted damage. and as someone who has gone through many stages of self-help and all these other self-taught psychology hacks, I can say that some of these are only a waste of time. The only ones that actually worked for me were the ones that provided the very basic steps, like positive self-talk, having mantras/affirmations, and meditation.
reply
My inner child has always been insecure and slow to come out of her shell, along with having some self-inflicted damage. and as someone who has gone through many stages of self-help and all these other self-taught psychology hacks, I can say that some of these are only a waste of time. The only ones that actually worked for me were the ones that provided the very basic steps, like positive self-talk, having mantras/affirmations, and meditation.
reply
David
Here's the problem with the inner child model. Its not too people its all the same. In a sense, its ONLY the wounded child. When you are dealing with issues you were never prepared for, you are ONLY that helpless child, no matter how old you are. Its no wonder in the right situation that you can be consumed by fear and helplessness. Even if you're a parent of your own child, you can look after them, but not yourself.
reply
Here's the problem with the inner child model. Its not too people its all the same. In a sense, its ONLY the wounded child. When you are dealing with issues you were never prepared for, you are ONLY that helpless child, no matter how old you are. Its no wonder in the right situation that you can be consumed by fear and helplessness. Even if you're a parent of your own child, you can look after them, but not yourself.
reply
education
I have a deep relationship with my mom almost movie like, she had made lot of sacrifices for me all her life, no one can care like she does and i never met anyone with the same relationship values as her, another like her probably don't exist. So my values and expectations are tooo high and i am never gonna meet them so i will try to be a good caregiver to myself
reply
I have a deep relationship with my mom almost movie like, she had made lot of sacrifices for me all her life, no one can care like she does and i never met anyone with the same relationship values as her, another like her probably don't exist. So my values and expectations are tooo high and i am never gonna meet them so i will try to be a good caregiver to myself
reply
YeeWhoEnterHere
I wish I could remove the pain part of the wound from time to time, and not be at it's mercy at the smallest of triggers. If only it could be extracted like a bad tooth, or cut of like diseased limb. I'm in my late forties and only now working at addressing this part of my reality, feeling hopeful but it's hard.
reply
I wish I could remove the pain part of the wound from time to time, and not be at it's mercy at the smallest of triggers. If only it could be extracted like a bad tooth, or cut of like diseased limb. I'm in my late forties and only now working at addressing this part of my reality, feeling hopeful but it's hard.
reply
Kim
One of the most painful memories of my childhood
Has been seeing how isolated was from gentle love.
No adult in my life ever spoke to me and asked why I didn't fit in.
I was a shy sad unsocialised child.
Afraid and emotionally frozen I cut off my pain to numb my body.
I numbed my emotions to not feel.
reply
One of the most painful memories of my childhood
Has been seeing how isolated was from gentle love.
No adult in my life ever spoke to me and asked why I didn't fit in.
I was a shy sad unsocialised child.
Afraid and emotionally frozen I cut off my pain to numb my body.
I numbed my emotions to not feel.
reply
Mashed_Potato_418
My inner child wants vengeance. I've never been a victim by nature, but I was broken as a child by stronger superiors. A victim would've just wanted to cry, but I can sense that creeping feeling of revenge. To hurt them even more.
reply
My inner child wants vengeance. I've never been a victim by nature, but I was broken as a child by stronger superiors. A victim would've just wanted to cry, but I can sense that creeping feeling of revenge. To hurt them even more.
reply
education
Everytime I wake up
My heart shall be in pain
I never know why until I told my most trustworthy friend about what I'm suffering through
That's when I knew that
The kid inside me is struggling to live in my heart of sorrows
reply
Everytime I wake up
My heart shall be in pain
I never know why until I told my most trustworthy friend about what I'm suffering through
That's when I knew that
The kid inside me is struggling to live in my heart of sorrows
reply
Croissant
I'm going to do this 4: 06 but where I write the people who hurt me, apologizing to me. Even better, tell a trusted friend, they write the letter and send it to you. Or they get another trusted friend/family member do it.
reply
I'm going to do this 4: 06 but where I write the people who hurt me, apologizing to me. Even better, tell a trusted friend, they write the letter and send it to you. Or they get another trusted friend/family member do it.
reply
Melanie
What helps me is buying the stuffies and other fun kidsy stuff I want. Also, if you feel immature, think about it this way. Your immaturity could just be your inner child trying to get your attention.
reply
What helps me is buying the stuffies and other fun kidsy stuff I want. Also, if you feel immature, think about it this way. Your immaturity could just be your inner child trying to get your attention.
reply
_r̸e̸a̸a̸
What will if my inner child causes me to not sleep well and the lack of doing anything to help the ones that are with you because my inner child is telling me that l don't feel safe
reply
What will if my inner child causes me to not sleep well and the lack of doing anything to help the ones that are with you because my inner child is telling me that l don't feel safe
reply
Mikasa
I think, my inner child is wounded. Even I'm on my 30's, I can't travel alone. My parents won't allow me. And I feel always anxious when taking board or eligibilty exams after failing.
reply
I think, my inner child is wounded. Even I'm on my 30's, I can't travel alone. My parents won't allow me. And I feel always anxious when taking board or eligibilty exams after failing.
reply
Glo
They say the soul chooses their parents, maybe suffering is the only way to become the phoenix raising. wounds makes us resilient and thickens our skin unlike the spoiled kids
reply
They say the soul chooses their parents, maybe suffering is the only way to become the phoenix raising. wounds makes us resilient and thickens our skin unlike the spoiled kids
reply
Stephen
The vast majority of caregivers will be the parents. Please stop pandering to the PC brigade by using these wishy-washy terms. it sounds so contrived and irritating.
reply
The vast majority of caregivers will be the parents. Please stop pandering to the PC brigade by using these wishy-washy terms. it sounds so contrived and irritating.
reply
Add a review, comment
Other channel videos
