6 Reasons Why Making Friends Is Hard
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Date: 2023-08-20
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Comments and reviews: 25
BEZZ!
I remember back in highschool i was the short one of the group
I was always treated as a joke and whenever i got seriously annoyed with them or whenever i tried to stand my ground, they'd say really gaslighting things to me to manipulate me into thinking I'm being too much or just annoying.
They never once had my back
They always made fun of me for every little thing, but I'm glad I'm out of there
But even so, at college I find myself it's hard to make friends sometimes. i have a couples of cool cats to talk to every now and then but it's not like they're gonna invite me to hangout next week or something
Although that would be nice
Maybe i should give it time?
I mean it's just, for so long I've been treated like scrap metal, just sitting there and my only purpose was to either do favors, or be made fun of. And because of that i never truly understood friendships all too well
I do have this one best friend who's always been there and i love her dearly, but i really need to branch out and get more friends
And people keep saying college is easy to make friends
Yeah not when you're an introvert who's been done dirty way too many times it's kinda difficult to find people
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I remember back in highschool i was the short one of the group
I was always treated as a joke and whenever i got seriously annoyed with them or whenever i tried to stand my ground, they'd say really gaslighting things to me to manipulate me into thinking I'm being too much or just annoying.
They never once had my back
They always made fun of me for every little thing, but I'm glad I'm out of there
But even so, at college I find myself it's hard to make friends sometimes. i have a couples of cool cats to talk to every now and then but it's not like they're gonna invite me to hangout next week or something
Although that would be nice
Maybe i should give it time?
I mean it's just, for so long I've been treated like scrap metal, just sitting there and my only purpose was to either do favors, or be made fun of. And because of that i never truly understood friendships all too well
I do have this one best friend who's always been there and i love her dearly, but i really need to branch out and get more friends
And people keep saying college is easy to make friends
Yeah not when you're an introvert who's been done dirty way too many times it's kinda difficult to find people
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Rain
I only had 1 close friend in real life and am glad our friendship is still close to the point we can take long breaks and still check on each other, knowing we both have lives of our own to work on. Were also polar opposites, shes an extrovert while Im an introvert lol.
However, most of my friendships were online and only now I realize that they were based on superficial reasons for the fact that I had no one to discuss similar topics as me. They were toxic but I still wanted their validation because it was the first time in such a long time that I felt seen as a person.
I didnt realize till they hurt me; I was losing myself and became more obsessed on being around them if it made me feel validated. I was being manipulated, made fun of and used, yet I still felt as though it was my fault our friendship fell apart.
I was so caught up trying to have the approval of those whove hurt me that I couldnt appreciate what I already had- a friend who loved me unconditionally and never would bring drama in my life. I learned to appreciate the 1 friend I had, and that a friendship is more than fandom related interest
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I only had 1 close friend in real life and am glad our friendship is still close to the point we can take long breaks and still check on each other, knowing we both have lives of our own to work on. Were also polar opposites, shes an extrovert while Im an introvert lol.
However, most of my friendships were online and only now I realize that they were based on superficial reasons for the fact that I had no one to discuss similar topics as me. They were toxic but I still wanted their validation because it was the first time in such a long time that I felt seen as a person.
I didnt realize till they hurt me; I was losing myself and became more obsessed on being around them if it made me feel validated. I was being manipulated, made fun of and used, yet I still felt as though it was my fault our friendship fell apart.
I was so caught up trying to have the approval of those whove hurt me that I couldnt appreciate what I already had- a friend who loved me unconditionally and never would bring drama in my life. I learned to appreciate the 1 friend I had, and that a friendship is more than fandom related interest
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Wendys
I really love my best friend, but sometimes she's a bit controlling, for example, I would write a story while sharing my screen, I get that she wants the story to be perfect, but writing is very tiring and I really hate it when someone tells me what to do, I would always act like I want a break and act like I'm sleepy, but she would not take it, and whenever I bring something up or correct her she would say whatever and then we laugh it off: sometimes I would accidentally offend her and she also laughs it off but its soo annoying, And whenever she asks me for a FaceTime I try to make excuses but she says girl, same I obviously don't want to facetime and she would still tell me to go somewhere private, and whenever there is noise in the background she tells me to turn it off even if I'm with my headphones and whenever my parents talk she's always asking what there talking about and she does not respect my privacy.
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I really love my best friend, but sometimes she's a bit controlling, for example, I would write a story while sharing my screen, I get that she wants the story to be perfect, but writing is very tiring and I really hate it when someone tells me what to do, I would always act like I want a break and act like I'm sleepy, but she would not take it, and whenever I bring something up or correct her she would say whatever and then we laugh it off: sometimes I would accidentally offend her and she also laughs it off but its soo annoying, And whenever she asks me for a FaceTime I try to make excuses but she says girl, same I obviously don't want to facetime and she would still tell me to go somewhere private, and whenever there is noise in the background she tells me to turn it off even if I'm with my headphones and whenever my parents talk she's always asking what there talking about and she does not respect my privacy.
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Baris
Whenever I meet ppl we start to get along very good after a very short time. Then after some time it seems like we are about to develop a real friendship. And just rgiht there it starts to get less and less contact. The person starts not answering me really anymore. Conversations become shorter. Less. I think to myself well maybe I should text anymore, I am certainly just bothering that person and. From that point on its done. I always start to think that ppl hate me and then I selfisolate because I dont wanna bother them. I dont want to pressure myself onto others. And v often ppl think I didnt like them around me. But actually I thought it the other way round. But I can't communicate it because then Id feel attention seeking again. Then I just accept my fait and continue my path alone again. To the point now where I even avoid making new friendships like these.
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Whenever I meet ppl we start to get along very good after a very short time. Then after some time it seems like we are about to develop a real friendship. And just rgiht there it starts to get less and less contact. The person starts not answering me really anymore. Conversations become shorter. Less. I think to myself well maybe I should text anymore, I am certainly just bothering that person and. From that point on its done. I always start to think that ppl hate me and then I selfisolate because I dont wanna bother them. I dont want to pressure myself onto others. And v often ppl think I didnt like them around me. But actually I thought it the other way round. But I can't communicate it because then Id feel attention seeking again. Then I just accept my fait and continue my path alone again. To the point now where I even avoid making new friendships like these.
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Sofiey's
i had a ex best friend on middle school, i was the first one to approach him and then we became best friends. but later on our relationship became more and more off because i didnt realize i was being toxic to him and whenever he apologized so many times we ended up being together again but i didnt learned my lesson and still was that toxic person, now the words i said to him before its what he is using now and his attitude wasnt the same before, we both changed, i became low self esteem beacuse of what i did to him, luckily my relatives kept saying i should let him go for the better, i did. right now i'm aware of befriending someone because i wanna be a better person than my oldself, i was hoping to have any friends in my new school
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i had a ex best friend on middle school, i was the first one to approach him and then we became best friends. but later on our relationship became more and more off because i didnt realize i was being toxic to him and whenever he apologized so many times we ended up being together again but i didnt learned my lesson and still was that toxic person, now the words i said to him before its what he is using now and his attitude wasnt the same before, we both changed, i became low self esteem beacuse of what i did to him, luckily my relatives kept saying i should let him go for the better, i did. right now i'm aware of befriending someone because i wanna be a better person than my oldself, i was hoping to have any friends in my new school
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Mike
Really tried to put myself out there. a couple times, but I guess the way I see myself and the way others see me isn't ideal anymore. Sadly I guess I can look mean when In reality would love to have friends again. Haven't made a genuinely new friend since college 2012. And it's hard to maintain friends once you have them and I guess my biggest issue is I never realized how important some of my friendships were. I let them fade without trying to hold on to them thinking I would just make new friends as I didn't have a problem making them it seemed. I need a new friend in my life it can be very stagnate and boring without someone bringing a new perspective/insight to life and how to live it.
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Really tried to put myself out there. a couple times, but I guess the way I see myself and the way others see me isn't ideal anymore. Sadly I guess I can look mean when In reality would love to have friends again. Haven't made a genuinely new friend since college 2012. And it's hard to maintain friends once you have them and I guess my biggest issue is I never realized how important some of my friendships were. I let them fade without trying to hold on to them thinking I would just make new friends as I didn't have a problem making them it seemed. I need a new friend in my life it can be very stagnate and boring without someone bringing a new perspective/insight to life and how to live it.
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Ian
As an little shy and ambivert guy, i already got fake friends, i already been lonely at school and i did'nt really had friends, i was sad and i was playing videogames for entertain myself, for hide from the exterior, and now that i have friends, it feels good and i think that even autistic or introverts can make it, my little brother have an autistic friend and he have a lot of friends who supports him, the only secret for getting friends is never give up and to try, the only difference of making friends when you are autistic or an introvert is the way to do it, but am sure taht if everyone tries it, everyone can do it
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As an little shy and ambivert guy, i already got fake friends, i already been lonely at school and i did'nt really had friends, i was sad and i was playing videogames for entertain myself, for hide from the exterior, and now that i have friends, it feels good and i think that even autistic or introverts can make it, my little brother have an autistic friend and he have a lot of friends who supports him, the only secret for getting friends is never give up and to try, the only difference of making friends when you are autistic or an introvert is the way to do it, but am sure taht if everyone tries it, everyone can do it
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Cairo
I suffer from all of the things that was talked about in the video and since Ive recently gone through a really bad anxiety attack that Im still coming down from it was really hard to try and communicate to my friend even though she goes through the same things it was hard for her to understand what I was saying because I was saying because I was saying all the wrong things. All I wanted to say is that I wanted to take a break but I couldnt and I kept saying other things all the time because I couldnt tell if I was confusing her now weve fallen out I guess. I was so sacred and I still am.
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I suffer from all of the things that was talked about in the video and since Ive recently gone through a really bad anxiety attack that Im still coming down from it was really hard to try and communicate to my friend even though she goes through the same things it was hard for her to understand what I was saying because I was saying because I was saying all the wrong things. All I wanted to say is that I wanted to take a break but I couldnt and I kept saying other things all the time because I couldnt tell if I was confusing her now weve fallen out I guess. I was so sacred and I still am.
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wildmint
I've never felt more unworthy of friendship that I felt in the past few months.
I'm really struggling to maintain good and meaningful friendships. I also somewhat convinced myself that I'm too unapproachable so I have to carry the weight of reaching out to people first, and I guess I'm good at it minus no one is actually interested.
People got their main friend groups and they would always leave me for it, which is okay, but why is it so hard to find someone who's normal but also lonely like me?
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I've never felt more unworthy of friendship that I felt in the past few months.
I'm really struggling to maintain good and meaningful friendships. I also somewhat convinced myself that I'm too unapproachable so I have to carry the weight of reaching out to people first, and I guess I'm good at it minus no one is actually interested.
People got their main friend groups and they would always leave me for it, which is okay, but why is it so hard to find someone who's normal but also lonely like me?
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The
Too tired, and I often believe people don't really care about me or what I say. They like me to keep them company but most of the time I dnt feel part of the group. It has been a while now since peeps talk to me through text, now i rarely write if that feeling creeps in. thanks god that those 2 friends still exist, but I still feel empty, alone and every once in a while when I do go out and talk, I get social anxiety and it sucks. Right now I'm feeling the emptiness when i should be sleeping.
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Too tired, and I often believe people don't really care about me or what I say. They like me to keep them company but most of the time I dnt feel part of the group. It has been a while now since peeps talk to me through text, now i rarely write if that feeling creeps in. thanks god that those 2 friends still exist, but I still feel empty, alone and every once in a while when I do go out and talk, I get social anxiety and it sucks. Right now I'm feeling the emptiness when i should be sleeping.
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GalaxyAmv
Ive had social anxiety for the past 4 years and all throughout middle school I havent been able to make a single friend. Around the beginning of my freshman year Ive forced myself to talk to people and start some conversations but so far people seem disinterested in becoming my friend. Another problem is I wanna be friends with people who I have similar interests with, but even those people are hard to approach, I get talked over when I speak and they still find me boring.
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Ive had social anxiety for the past 4 years and all throughout middle school I havent been able to make a single friend. Around the beginning of my freshman year Ive forced myself to talk to people and start some conversations but so far people seem disinterested in becoming my friend. Another problem is I wanna be friends with people who I have similar interests with, but even those people are hard to approach, I get talked over when I speak and they still find me boring.
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Kambako
I have friends but sometimes I feel like I don't have any friends. Well whenever I talk to my friend her friend will get jealous and act as if she is protective over her. I don't like this tbh. I have stopped speaking with her for this reason. And my other friends just say hi, bye that's it. I don't even have a bestie lol. And the guy who have crush on my friend always compare me with her and often say I am jealous of her. I have stopped talking with him too.
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I have friends but sometimes I feel like I don't have any friends. Well whenever I talk to my friend her friend will get jealous and act as if she is protective over her. I don't like this tbh. I have stopped speaking with her for this reason. And my other friends just say hi, bye that's it. I don't even have a bestie lol. And the guy who have crush on my friend always compare me with her and often say I am jealous of her. I have stopped talking with him too.
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sugm
man, im slowly starting to lose my friends. All because of boredom and stuff, or loss of interest. And I've gotten very attached to them, they're like family to me and i love them very much. How do i let this go because I've been thinking of leaving my friendgroup for a minute now and some of the others don't really want to. I want them the best but i feel like im being selfish, am i a bad friend? Im slowly losing my mind to this.
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man, im slowly starting to lose my friends. All because of boredom and stuff, or loss of interest. And I've gotten very attached to them, they're like family to me and i love them very much. How do i let this go because I've been thinking of leaving my friendgroup for a minute now and some of the others don't really want to. I want them the best but i feel like im being selfish, am i a bad friend? Im slowly losing my mind to this.
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Terrance
Does anybody else ever feel like, when they do make okay friends, there's a sense of a lack of respect from them? Like they don't listen to you or take what you do or say seriously? The sad part is I feel like that about everyone I've ever met including my own family. I don't think I've ever really met someone who just believed in me, you know. Sometimes, I just feel like giving up and just throwing in the towel.
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Does anybody else ever feel like, when they do make okay friends, there's a sense of a lack of respect from them? Like they don't listen to you or take what you do or say seriously? The sad part is I feel like that about everyone I've ever met including my own family. I don't think I've ever really met someone who just believed in me, you know. Sometimes, I just feel like giving up and just throwing in the towel.
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Saumya
The problem is with me is that I have friends and I never made them they just thought I was good so kinda pulled me into a friend group and being in that group for so long I can see that everyone secretly talk shit about others so I kinda felt sad and I know one day Im gonna leave them when schools over so Im just getting ready to make a bestie for life in collage [P. S. I never had a bestie so wish me luck]
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The problem is with me is that I have friends and I never made them they just thought I was good so kinda pulled me into a friend group and being in that group for so long I can see that everyone secretly talk shit about others so I kinda felt sad and I know one day Im gonna leave them when schools over so Im just getting ready to make a bestie for life in collage [P. S. I never had a bestie so wish me luck]
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justbekool
I dont know why but I feel like people just dont like me even though Im not someone who really talks. because I might be walking in the hallway and someone say look theres your friendand the other person will say hell no than laugh. Im not sure why this always happens but its always been hard for me to make friends. I dont know if its because I look unapproachable or if its the way I look.
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I dont know why but I feel like people just dont like me even though Im not someone who really talks. because I might be walking in the hallway and someone say look theres your friendand the other person will say hell no than laugh. Im not sure why this always happens but its always been hard for me to make friends. I dont know if its because I look unapproachable or if its the way I look.
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DonnerBlitzen138
That is or was all my former friends, 3 years ago. I was an addict whose only friend group were other addicts. I got clean and sober, they didn't. Now I am alone, anxiety ridden, depressed, tired and just wanting to make a friend who shares my interests.
I just turned 40 a few weeks ago, it is hard starting over trying to make new friends without feeling really really creepy.
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That is or was all my former friends, 3 years ago. I was an addict whose only friend group were other addicts. I got clean and sober, they didn't. Now I am alone, anxiety ridden, depressed, tired and just wanting to make a friend who shares my interests.
I just turned 40 a few weeks ago, it is hard starting over trying to make new friends without feeling really really creepy.
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Venom
Past friendships still haunt you.
Yup, that's true. Back when I was in prep and the 1 & 2 grade I had this group of friends ( girls ) whom I often spend time with. Or at least I thought they were my friends. they started bullying me and stealing from me and ever since that, I stopped making friends, I stopped trusting anyone and I preferred to be by myself.
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Past friendships still haunt you.
Yup, that's true. Back when I was in prep and the 1 & 2 grade I had this group of friends ( girls ) whom I often spend time with. Or at least I thought they were my friends. they started bullying me and stealing from me and ever since that, I stopped making friends, I stopped trusting anyone and I preferred to be by myself.
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NickIsAGoodName
Lol, I can't take time for myself my best friend is depressed and really struggling rn and his way of recharging is hugs and talking all night. But I just want to be alone and hugs make me anxious, but I am a giver who refuses to take and am really timid so I just jokingly hint at my suffering and continue to help my friends
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Lol, I can't take time for myself my best friend is depressed and really struggling rn and his way of recharging is hugs and talking all night. But I just want to be alone and hugs make me anxious, but I am a giver who refuses to take and am really timid so I just jokingly hint at my suffering and continue to help my friends
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Prince
One way to make a friend is being consistent and putting in some effort here and there. I let go of someone for procrastinating too much early on in developing the friendship. If you say or plan something (coffee/a call) do it.
I did what I said and didnt get it reciprocated. Not what I value so stopped making effort: )
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One way to make a friend is being consistent and putting in some effort here and there. I let go of someone for procrastinating too much early on in developing the friendship. If you say or plan something (coffee/a call) do it.
I did what I said and didnt get it reciprocated. Not what I value so stopped making effort: )
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education
I just moved to a new schoola and I still have no friend, my dad said I should ask questions about what they like and stuff while I'm still considered the new student but I don't know how to approach people since in my old school when theres a new student my friends would become friends with them and I would join
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I just moved to a new schoola and I still have no friend, my dad said I should ask questions about what they like and stuff while I'm still considered the new student but I don't know how to approach people since in my old school when theres a new student my friends would become friends with them and I would join
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Almaha
I talk to new people easily but its hard for me to make friends. I dont really enjoy my time with my friends I cant act normal or be comfortable with them they drain me I feel like I need to act in-front of them to just keep up with them.
Thank god I have a family and cousins, but sometimes you want a friend
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I talk to new people easily but its hard for me to make friends. I dont really enjoy my time with my friends I cant act normal or be comfortable with them they drain me I feel like I need to act in-front of them to just keep up with them.
Thank god I have a family and cousins, but sometimes you want a friend
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Young_grandpa
Maintaining friendships is hard bc even tho I think they're amazing and we share each other's secrets I still struggle to actually feel that bond and I always think they secretly hate me a lot or find me boring which is why I kinda distance myself from them a lot and oh shit I got trust issues
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Maintaining friendships is hard bc even tho I think they're amazing and we share each other's secrets I still struggle to actually feel that bond and I always think they secretly hate me a lot or find me boring which is why I kinda distance myself from them a lot and oh shit I got trust issues
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TheFreeHealer
I don't feel like I've ever had friends. Back in school i had friends but they were more like classmates than actual friends which is VERY different.
Just recently I've tried to make friends with someone and it didn't really go too well
It's kinda hard to make friends.
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I don't feel like I've ever had friends. Back in school i had friends but they were more like classmates than actual friends which is VERY different.
Just recently I've tried to make friends with someone and it didn't really go too well
It's kinda hard to make friends.
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Mario
Past Friendships haunt you THIS! THIS ONE! I FEEL THIS ONE ALL THE TIME! It wasn't just friends either. The ones who betrayed me were entire communities or groups. That is literally the reason I don't trust anyone I meet anywhere. Because, well, what if they do the same thing again?
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Past Friendships haunt you THIS! THIS ONE! I FEEL THIS ONE ALL THE TIME! It wasn't just friends either. The ones who betrayed me were entire communities or groups. That is literally the reason I don't trust anyone I meet anywhere. Because, well, what if they do the same thing again?
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