7 Signs You May Be With The Wrong Person
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Date: 2023-08-20
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Comments and reviews: 25
Maksym
I found reading through all the comments to be really interesting. There's so many varied ideas/theories about what a relationship is meant to feel like, what it's supposed to be, and what it's not supposed to be. Other than abuse, I really don't know whether I agree or disagree with any of the reasons why people leave relationships. Everybody has their own reasons, I suppose, but conversely people don't get into relationships for good reasons either. They just kind of happen.
I guess my feeling on it really comes down to putting work into a relationship, growing that love, understanding your partner, and trying to be a supportive individual. I do think this is hard, and I don't think relationships are meant to be easy whatsoever. It sounds pessimistic, but in a way I think all relationships are doomed to fall apart. Their success really comes down to whether both partners are putting in the work. As long as they're putting in effort, I think it can work out.
I'm fascinated by the culture of matchmaking. Sometimes the people matched wouldn't even pick each other out, but because a relationship is important to them and they make an effort to make the relationship work, it works. To me, this stuff goes much further than gut instincts or feeling just right. In my experience, if you are hyper-aware and over-reliant on your feelings, you're not necessarily going to make the best decision for yourself. Yes, trust your intuition if your partner is obviously a psycho, but also be aware that your feelings change literally from day-to-day.
Your partner is stressed, you're stressed. People break up for literally the silliest possible reasons, sometimes for good reasons. I guess my final thought is to not over-rely on the Internet to tell you what your relationship should look or feel like. It's a trap. Nobody knows what it feels like, and all experiences are subjective. The honeymoon phase is not love, just temporary infatuation. To process this stuff, my advice is to get a counselor, and most importantly, above all else, just talk to your partner. Are they happy? Do you make each other happy? Do you both want to grow? It's good things to seriously think about, but also realize it doesn't mean all avenues lead to a break-up, either. Good luck to you!
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I found reading through all the comments to be really interesting. There's so many varied ideas/theories about what a relationship is meant to feel like, what it's supposed to be, and what it's not supposed to be. Other than abuse, I really don't know whether I agree or disagree with any of the reasons why people leave relationships. Everybody has their own reasons, I suppose, but conversely people don't get into relationships for good reasons either. They just kind of happen.
I guess my feeling on it really comes down to putting work into a relationship, growing that love, understanding your partner, and trying to be a supportive individual. I do think this is hard, and I don't think relationships are meant to be easy whatsoever. It sounds pessimistic, but in a way I think all relationships are doomed to fall apart. Their success really comes down to whether both partners are putting in the work. As long as they're putting in effort, I think it can work out.
I'm fascinated by the culture of matchmaking. Sometimes the people matched wouldn't even pick each other out, but because a relationship is important to them and they make an effort to make the relationship work, it works. To me, this stuff goes much further than gut instincts or feeling just right. In my experience, if you are hyper-aware and over-reliant on your feelings, you're not necessarily going to make the best decision for yourself. Yes, trust your intuition if your partner is obviously a psycho, but also be aware that your feelings change literally from day-to-day.
Your partner is stressed, you're stressed. People break up for literally the silliest possible reasons, sometimes for good reasons. I guess my final thought is to not over-rely on the Internet to tell you what your relationship should look or feel like. It's a trap. Nobody knows what it feels like, and all experiences are subjective. The honeymoon phase is not love, just temporary infatuation. To process this stuff, my advice is to get a counselor, and most importantly, above all else, just talk to your partner. Are they happy? Do you make each other happy? Do you both want to grow? It's good things to seriously think about, but also realize it doesn't mean all avenues lead to a break-up, either. Good luck to you!
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Raph
I love my gf, weve been together for 3 years now, and the problem is, idk if the kind of guy I am can be in a relationship, because after spending a weekend at her house I already feel the need of coming back home to do my hobbies, because seeing their routine it seems like I couldnt do my stuff there, such as music, painting, studying, Im a guy who loves my time alone, but I also love her and this past week I was so into all of these things that I barely talked to her and she was so sad saying I was distant, I felt horrible, she gave an idea and said she wants me to live with her and her grandmother, but as I am a guy always singing, playing the guitar, getting messy with the paintings, Im not sure if this could work as her grandma is always there, it wouldnt feel like home and I wouldnt feel so comfortable, and I fear I would live unhappy, getting home from working all day, then giving attention to them, doing things for the house, and what about the time for my hobbies that make me so happy? Sometimes I make a mess with my tools and when its time to go to bed in my bedroom I leave it all there because nobody cares, I can take care of the it the next day, but when you are living in someone elses house its different, idk Im lost, I like the idea of doing what I like to do when I feel the need and nobody complaining because they need attention or because its too late to make a mess with my tools, it scares me idk what to do anymore, I fear leaving my family to live with her family and do not be able to feel like home, feel miserable because I cant do my stuff, and I feel so selfish saying this but it does help my mental health these things and I bet she gets mad when I say these things help me the most than being with her around
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I love my gf, weve been together for 3 years now, and the problem is, idk if the kind of guy I am can be in a relationship, because after spending a weekend at her house I already feel the need of coming back home to do my hobbies, because seeing their routine it seems like I couldnt do my stuff there, such as music, painting, studying, Im a guy who loves my time alone, but I also love her and this past week I was so into all of these things that I barely talked to her and she was so sad saying I was distant, I felt horrible, she gave an idea and said she wants me to live with her and her grandmother, but as I am a guy always singing, playing the guitar, getting messy with the paintings, Im not sure if this could work as her grandma is always there, it wouldnt feel like home and I wouldnt feel so comfortable, and I fear I would live unhappy, getting home from working all day, then giving attention to them, doing things for the house, and what about the time for my hobbies that make me so happy? Sometimes I make a mess with my tools and when its time to go to bed in my bedroom I leave it all there because nobody cares, I can take care of the it the next day, but when you are living in someone elses house its different, idk Im lost, I like the idea of doing what I like to do when I feel the need and nobody complaining because they need attention or because its too late to make a mess with my tools, it scares me idk what to do anymore, I fear leaving my family to live with her family and do not be able to feel like home, feel miserable because I cant do my stuff, and I feel so selfish saying this but it does help my mental health these things and I bet she gets mad when I say these things help me the most than being with her around
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bananaman22
1) yep i dread meeting her or sharing stuff with her. i never know when she will explode
2) yep really stressful. being at work is more peaceful. and even then im wondering when she will explode. ive never been so stressed in life
3) almost no expectations are met at all. i have to compromise everything. i work full time. i pay the majority. i do most the housework. i do most the planning.
4) she was late even on the first date.
5) i dont need the voice to tell me. i have so many reasons i just keep giving chances
6) lol consciencious shes super lazy. she would eat seaweed and drop stuff on the floor. and it be there forever. and its my fault for not accepting her laziness and irresponsibility but im neurotic.
7) we are not very similar. but we dont have the same values and i just cant be myself. i cant share anything with her. i cant trust her with any of my thoughts or emotions. she would blame me for bothering her and id not only have to manage my own emotions + her scolding me + her emotions. and shes a counsellor.
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1) yep i dread meeting her or sharing stuff with her. i never know when she will explode
2) yep really stressful. being at work is more peaceful. and even then im wondering when she will explode. ive never been so stressed in life
3) almost no expectations are met at all. i have to compromise everything. i work full time. i pay the majority. i do most the housework. i do most the planning.
4) she was late even on the first date.
5) i dont need the voice to tell me. i have so many reasons i just keep giving chances
6) lol consciencious shes super lazy. she would eat seaweed and drop stuff on the floor. and it be there forever. and its my fault for not accepting her laziness and irresponsibility but im neurotic.
7) we are not very similar. but we dont have the same values and i just cant be myself. i cant share anything with her. i cant trust her with any of my thoughts or emotions. she would blame me for bothering her and id not only have to manage my own emotions + her scolding me + her emotions. and shes a counsellor.
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WhiteWolf954
My gut instinct and my intuition is spot on. I just left my girlfriend last night because she gave me the worst gut feelings and im not the type to really be jealous or insecure. She also was very combative, If she wanted to talk to me about something it was nice and easy but if I wanted to talk to her about something, instant arguing and defending herself. Add in a handful of shady situations that made my stomach curl and I couldnt take it anymore. She didnt respect me and I kept pushing the relationship because I wanted to make it work. Now she is begging me to stay and saying she will do better but its too late. Should have tried hard before the relationship getting to this point. Im hurt and its hard but I know this is the right decision
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My gut instinct and my intuition is spot on. I just left my girlfriend last night because she gave me the worst gut feelings and im not the type to really be jealous or insecure. She also was very combative, If she wanted to talk to me about something it was nice and easy but if I wanted to talk to her about something, instant arguing and defending herself. Add in a handful of shady situations that made my stomach curl and I couldnt take it anymore. She didnt respect me and I kept pushing the relationship because I wanted to make it work. Now she is begging me to stay and saying she will do better but its too late. Should have tried hard before the relationship getting to this point. Im hurt and its hard but I know this is the right decision
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heulsuse
I knew from the beginning of my previous relationships that it wasn't gonna last but I held on to hope that it would change because I was alone and desperate.
I've finally found the right person tho, we are pretty much the same person, sometimes it's like we share one mind because we finish each others sentences a lot or say the same things, great minds think like they say! But he's still smarter than me, he's more of a talker and I'm more of a listener, he's also very optimistic while I can be a bit pessimistic at times and I give up easily whereas he keeps motivating me and pushing me so I keep going. He's pretty stoic and I adore that, one of the reasons I agreed to marry him is because he literally and figuratively completes me.
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I knew from the beginning of my previous relationships that it wasn't gonna last but I held on to hope that it would change because I was alone and desperate.
I've finally found the right person tho, we are pretty much the same person, sometimes it's like we share one mind because we finish each others sentences a lot or say the same things, great minds think like they say! But he's still smarter than me, he's more of a talker and I'm more of a listener, he's also very optimistic while I can be a bit pessimistic at times and I give up easily whereas he keeps motivating me and pushing me so I keep going. He's pretty stoic and I adore that, one of the reasons I agreed to marry him is because he literally and figuratively completes me.
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Pantophob
I cant seem to end a relationship even though I know it wont work. Even when they are completely wrong for me or when they hurt me on purpose. I just cant seem to let go after a while. I know I need to stop talking to my ex thats giving hints she wants to get back together. There is no reason whatsoever I should get back with her. She is not what I want, she lied and played games She manipulated. She didnt try. Wouldnt compromise wouldnt even talk to me. But at one point in time she made me feel really important to her. But I gotta just accept that time is long gone. She has done everything she could to prove she dont care Im just hung up on the past and wanting someone that really cares. Weak Im weak. Ill figure it out though
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I cant seem to end a relationship even though I know it wont work. Even when they are completely wrong for me or when they hurt me on purpose. I just cant seem to let go after a while. I know I need to stop talking to my ex thats giving hints she wants to get back together. There is no reason whatsoever I should get back with her. She is not what I want, she lied and played games She manipulated. She didnt try. Wouldnt compromise wouldnt even talk to me. But at one point in time she made me feel really important to her. But I gotta just accept that time is long gone. She has done everything she could to prove she dont care Im just hung up on the past and wanting someone that really cares. Weak Im weak. Ill figure it out though
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marijuanicole
i married after only a year of dating. i always told myself to at least wait three years, but i couldnt find it in my heart to say no to his proposal. im so unhappy. i dont feel in love, although i feel loved by him. i can tell he loves me and he is trying, but i feel i made a mistake. a part of me feels obligated to stay and not hurt him, especially with all that hes helped me with. i want to leave him and its always on my mind. i just dont know how to tell him or how to confront the situation. i dont want to hurt him. i feel awful, but i dont want to be his wife anymore
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i married after only a year of dating. i always told myself to at least wait three years, but i couldnt find it in my heart to say no to his proposal. im so unhappy. i dont feel in love, although i feel loved by him. i can tell he loves me and he is trying, but i feel i made a mistake. a part of me feels obligated to stay and not hurt him, especially with all that hes helped me with. i want to leave him and its always on my mind. i just dont know how to tell him or how to confront the situation. i dont want to hurt him. i feel awful, but i dont want to be his wife anymore
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Angela
I relate to all of these except #4 Things were great for about 6 months but slowly went down from there and the past few months have been soul crushingly painful because they dont seem to care how I feel anymore and dont apologize when they hurt me. They stopped trying and being invested and dont put hardly any effort in anymore. Im just so disappointed at how things are going. Only their needs and feelings seem to matter anymore.
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I relate to all of these except #4 Things were great for about 6 months but slowly went down from there and the past few months have been soul crushingly painful because they dont seem to care how I feel anymore and dont apologize when they hurt me. They stopped trying and being invested and dont put hardly any effort in anymore. Im just so disappointed at how things are going. Only their needs and feelings seem to matter anymore.
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AltruisticWarrior
Her and I were perfect until she started talking to other guys and cheating multiple times. She's aware now that she prefers to have validation from multiple places, in and out of work. The straw from me was seeing her on a security camera in our living room facing the front door. Especially when she's happily initiating and kissing him when she makes excuses not to, with me. It was very painful to see. 15 years gone.
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Her and I were perfect until she started talking to other guys and cheating multiple times. She's aware now that she prefers to have validation from multiple places, in and out of work. The straw from me was seeing her on a security camera in our living room facing the front door. Especially when she's happily initiating and kissing him when she makes excuses not to, with me. It was very painful to see. 15 years gone.
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el
I'm with the wrong person, but I don't know how to end it. She's a sensitive girl-- so am I. I hate the idea of upsetting her, and we share practically all our friends, I'm scared I'll end up losing them in the process. I was so confident in us, but then i left the honeymoon phase and I've seen her flaws and I've tried, yet haven't been able to compromise. I'm struggling with this and I don't know how to go along with it.
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I'm with the wrong person, but I don't know how to end it. She's a sensitive girl-- so am I. I hate the idea of upsetting her, and we share practically all our friends, I'm scared I'll end up losing them in the process. I was so confident in us, but then i left the honeymoon phase and I've seen her flaws and I've tried, yet haven't been able to compromise. I'm struggling with this and I don't know how to go along with it.
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Pocky
I'm a bit confused about my relationship with my boyfriend. sometimes I feel like he's trying to make me feel bad for him so i'll stay with him, and just want to break up with him. but then I feel happy around him. but that first part may be true, cause he randomly out of the blue tells me he's crying. I don't know what to do, sometimes I fear he'll leave him, but then sometimes I want to leave him. I'm so confused.
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I'm a bit confused about my relationship with my boyfriend. sometimes I feel like he's trying to make me feel bad for him so i'll stay with him, and just want to break up with him. but then I feel happy around him. but that first part may be true, cause he randomly out of the blue tells me he's crying. I don't know what to do, sometimes I fear he'll leave him, but then sometimes I want to leave him. I'm so confused.
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Plato
Red flags: more than once - you agree on a lunch appointment - and more than once she never shows up. When asked why they did not show up - they respond rather casually and with no apology - they got busy with something else and could not make it for the appointment. Red flag two: She has a hard time saying Thank You when a gift or present gets given to her. You always have to remind her she needs to say Thank You.
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Red flags: more than once - you agree on a lunch appointment - and more than once she never shows up. When asked why they did not show up - they respond rather casually and with no apology - they got busy with something else and could not make it for the appointment. Red flag two: She has a hard time saying Thank You when a gift or present gets given to her. You always have to remind her she needs to say Thank You.
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Megan
We really love each other and there's a lot of passion, but he's always working and we can meet every 10 days and this make me suffer a lot, I knew there was this problem from the start but I thought it would get better. Instead he told me he can't give me what I wanted and I'm devastated, I love him and I don't know how to let him go.
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We really love each other and there's a lot of passion, but he's always working and we can meet every 10 days and this make me suffer a lot, I knew there was this problem from the start but I thought it would get better. Instead he told me he can't give me what I wanted and I'm devastated, I love him and I don't know how to let him go.
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Valkyn
I dont know to be honest with you I feel like Im the one ruining my relationship anger issues and stress and insecurity about relationships and love to be honest with you I dont think mine will stay I think shell be gone here soon she deserves happiness. I have been failing her left and right we argue everyday but its to leave
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I dont know to be honest with you I feel like Im the one ruining my relationship anger issues and stress and insecurity about relationships and love to be honest with you I dont think mine will stay I think shell be gone here soon she deserves happiness. I have been failing her left and right we argue everyday but its to leave
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IfReborn
Had this issue with someone who was not even a relationship. I think I was being fixed up with her when I was in college. She was attractive but I did not like her. If you ever come across this be honest and let the other person know how you feel and move on quick. don't linger remove yourself.
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Had this issue with someone who was not even a relationship. I think I was being fixed up with her when I was in college. She was attractive but I did not like her. If you ever come across this be honest and let the other person know how you feel and move on quick. don't linger remove yourself.
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Mind
My girlfriend is now 18 and she said I can make my own decisions, it doesn't seem fun anymore on our dates, a person called Steve said See you in 9 weeks which it's how long she has got off for Summer Holidays from thier college, I much prefer my friend Zoe my college friend.
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My girlfriend is now 18 and she said I can make my own decisions, it doesn't seem fun anymore on our dates, a person called Steve said See you in 9 weeks which it's how long she has got off for Summer Holidays from thier college, I much prefer my friend Zoe my college friend.
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TonysGabagool
Honestly to ne it was always my guy feeling. You just instinctively know you're with the wrong person. Maybe some people don't have that instinct or they just simply don't trust their gut but chances are if you DO have that gut feeling than you're most likely right.
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Honestly to ne it was always my guy feeling. You just instinctively know you're with the wrong person. Maybe some people don't have that instinct or they just simply don't trust their gut but chances are if you DO have that gut feeling than you're most likely right.
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Ironically
I wish I was more honest with myself before my relationships got serious. I knew that most I dated werent the one, but id give in thinking theyd change or I would, it doesnt happen. I need to be more strict with my standards.
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I wish I was more honest with myself before my relationships got serious. I knew that most I dated werent the one, but id give in thinking theyd change or I would, it doesnt happen. I need to be more strict with my standards.
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Marley
this is really to think about! These videos help. thanks! what you said makes total sense. I'm sensitive thx to natural drops from my best friend eve. spanish fly boosted my energy and everything after only 5 drops. great results
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this is really to think about! These videos help. thanks! what you said makes total sense. I'm sensitive thx to natural drops from my best friend eve. spanish fly boosted my energy and everything after only 5 drops. great results
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Deco_ghost_53
Is it also possible the real reason I got in this relationship in the first place was because I was lonely and jealous of other people? I think this video made me realize something so, thank you, psych2go!
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Is it also possible the real reason I got in this relationship in the first place was because I was lonely and jealous of other people? I think this video made me realize something so, thank you, psych2go!
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ALL
Maybe im in the wrong person but i love my childrens so even the situation is not good. i try my best to make feel, its okey, everythings well be fine. but theres a time i feel empty, useless, worthless,
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Maybe im in the wrong person but i love my childrens so even the situation is not good. i try my best to make feel, its okey, everythings well be fine. but theres a time i feel empty, useless, worthless,
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Lexy
Number one, feeling unhappy. it might be depression or related to any other sphere of your life, making it hard to enjoy even the good times with your partner. They might not be the problem at all.
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Number one, feeling unhappy. it might be depression or related to any other sphere of your life, making it hard to enjoy even the good times with your partner. They might not be the problem at all.
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Sergi
I can't make up my mind if I should listen to my very volatile emotions, my unproven gut or my lacking reason. The more I reason it the more damage I make, but I'm too afraid to lose it all.
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I can't make up my mind if I should listen to my very volatile emotions, my unproven gut or my lacking reason. The more I reason it the more damage I make, but I'm too afraid to lose it all.
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Jana
or its when a friend tells your mother that the guy is abusive and controlling, but you don't see him doing that to you? he's abusive and controlling to others, but not to you.
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or its when a friend tells your mother that the guy is abusive and controlling, but you don't see him doing that to you? he's abusive and controlling to others, but not to you.
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Indrid
I have had no friends, no girlfriend, no acquaintances, no coworkers, since the 8th of August 2000 at 18: 34. There are no wrong persons in my life. Nobody knows me at all.
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I have had no friends, no girlfriend, no acquaintances, no coworkers, since the 8th of August 2000 at 18: 34. There are no wrong persons in my life. Nobody knows me at all.
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