10 Harsh Truths You Need To Accept To Live a Happy Life
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Date: 2023-08-20
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Comments and reviews: 25
Benjamin
I wonder how different I am from normal people. Ignoring the vast changes I've made to myself in the past year that I did not for myself, but for my wife.
1. I never cared to be with people. I never felt alone.
2. People leaving me never bothered me, including death of someone close.
3. Existing was never some great thing. One of my favorite things to do was sleep because it meant I didn't realize I still existed.
4. I never felt happy, I never felt sad, I never felt mad. Just never felt anything for anything or anyone.
The only thing I experienced was boredom. I hated boredom. Everything I did was to minimize boredom. I'm highly intellectual. I need constant mental stimulation, which can be in the form of introspection. So many hours of my life staring at a wall, just thinking. Trying to better understand myself.
This video make a lot of assumptions about having feelings, caring about feelings, and social connections. Some people are perfectly content being alone and never being happy. The first time I felt happy was in my mid 30s, and I didn't like it. It was so foreign to me and it interfered with my ability to logically think. I loathed a feeling hijacking my reasoning.
In the end, I realized I cared for my wife, even if I felt nothing. Using that as a reason to change myself, I have taught myself how to feel, how to have emotions, how to not want to be alone. I cannot say if it's good for me. My anxiety has greatly increased. I am not used to wanting to be happy, or with someone. I am no longer myself. But I have decide she is worth it. If I can't be happy for myself, I can be happy for her.
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I wonder how different I am from normal people. Ignoring the vast changes I've made to myself in the past year that I did not for myself, but for my wife.
1. I never cared to be with people. I never felt alone.
2. People leaving me never bothered me, including death of someone close.
3. Existing was never some great thing. One of my favorite things to do was sleep because it meant I didn't realize I still existed.
4. I never felt happy, I never felt sad, I never felt mad. Just never felt anything for anything or anyone.
The only thing I experienced was boredom. I hated boredom. Everything I did was to minimize boredom. I'm highly intellectual. I need constant mental stimulation, which can be in the form of introspection. So many hours of my life staring at a wall, just thinking. Trying to better understand myself.
This video make a lot of assumptions about having feelings, caring about feelings, and social connections. Some people are perfectly content being alone and never being happy. The first time I felt happy was in my mid 30s, and I didn't like it. It was so foreign to me and it interfered with my ability to logically think. I loathed a feeling hijacking my reasoning.
In the end, I realized I cared for my wife, even if I felt nothing. Using that as a reason to change myself, I have taught myself how to feel, how to have emotions, how to not want to be alone. I cannot say if it's good for me. My anxiety has greatly increased. I am not used to wanting to be happy, or with someone. I am no longer myself. But I have decide she is worth it. If I can't be happy for myself, I can be happy for her.
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robert
I am 77 years old. Looking back I really have no regrets. I grew up on a farm and learned hard work at an early age. In 1963 I graduated from high school and enrolled in college at NIU. I graduated in January of 1968. I went to work in Chicago as a personal trust accountant. I enrolled in Sep of 1769 to DePaul University School of Law night school to get a law degree. After four months I dropped out because I was drafted into the Marines. While in the Marines I volunteered to learn to jump out of planes. I got out of the Marines in September 1971. Shortly thereafter I enrolled in a flight school to learn to fly small planes. I got my private pilot's license and flew for over 40 years. When I was 50 years old I decided to get a black belt in karate. When I was 40 years old I went to a technical school to learn programming. For over 25 years I wrote software for the airline industry. Because of the airline discounts my wife, my daughter, and I traveled to many foreign places.
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I am 77 years old. Looking back I really have no regrets. I grew up on a farm and learned hard work at an early age. In 1963 I graduated from high school and enrolled in college at NIU. I graduated in January of 1968. I went to work in Chicago as a personal trust accountant. I enrolled in Sep of 1769 to DePaul University School of Law night school to get a law degree. After four months I dropped out because I was drafted into the Marines. While in the Marines I volunteered to learn to jump out of planes. I got out of the Marines in September 1971. Shortly thereafter I enrolled in a flight school to learn to fly small planes. I got my private pilot's license and flew for over 40 years. When I was 50 years old I decided to get a black belt in karate. When I was 40 years old I went to a technical school to learn programming. For over 25 years I wrote software for the airline industry. Because of the airline discounts my wife, my daughter, and I traveled to many foreign places.
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Chris
I just turned 50 years old, I agree with all of these. If you are a young person then this good advice.
I want to add though that having financial independence and a sound emotional self awareness is very important.
These two things will help you weather life's curveball that will get thrown at you at some point.
1. Financial independence: Don't count on anyone to provide for you, if you are on your own unexpectedly a solid career will be paramount.
2. Emotional self awareness: People whom you trust wholeheartedly are capable of hurting you, really bad.
Be Emotionally strong and don't lose sight of who you are and what you know about yourself.
Now carry on young people. You are loved, you are good, be honest and truthful to yourself and those around you.
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I just turned 50 years old, I agree with all of these. If you are a young person then this good advice.
I want to add though that having financial independence and a sound emotional self awareness is very important.
These two things will help you weather life's curveball that will get thrown at you at some point.
1. Financial independence: Don't count on anyone to provide for you, if you are on your own unexpectedly a solid career will be paramount.
2. Emotional self awareness: People whom you trust wholeheartedly are capable of hurting you, really bad.
Be Emotionally strong and don't lose sight of who you are and what you know about yourself.
Now carry on young people. You are loved, you are good, be honest and truthful to yourself and those around you.
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Tony
My late wife worked with many people to help them improve their lives. One issue she found many ladies were still burdened with into their senior years; her own Mother included, was that they had never learned that it was okay to say No, For decades they had always put others needs ahead of their own. Once they recognized this trait in themselves and learned that it was a good thing to put their own needs ahead of others' needs some of the time, each experienced a life-changing release and true feelings of freedom. The ladies I speak of were in their 60's, 70's and 80's and would have benefitted significantly had they realized this much earlier in life.
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My late wife worked with many people to help them improve their lives. One issue she found many ladies were still burdened with into their senior years; her own Mother included, was that they had never learned that it was okay to say No, For decades they had always put others needs ahead of their own. Once they recognized this trait in themselves and learned that it was a good thing to put their own needs ahead of others' needs some of the time, each experienced a life-changing release and true feelings of freedom. The ladies I speak of were in their 60's, 70's and 80's and would have benefitted significantly had they realized this much earlier in life.
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Robert
I wish I had studied harder, learned a foreign language and to play an instrument. Conversely, I wish I worked less hard once I graduated. And I wish I played sports more, exercised more and took more adventures. I wish I would have stood up to all the jerks I encountered. And I think back about all the girls and women I think I could have had, but was too shy or cautious to try. Finally, I think back at all the girls and women who strung me along and Friend Zoned me; I wish I would have read the signals and stopped letting them exploit me and waste my time.
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I wish I had studied harder, learned a foreign language and to play an instrument. Conversely, I wish I worked less hard once I graduated. And I wish I played sports more, exercised more and took more adventures. I wish I would have stood up to all the jerks I encountered. And I think back about all the girls and women I think I could have had, but was too shy or cautious to try. Finally, I think back at all the girls and women who strung me along and Friend Zoned me; I wish I would have read the signals and stopped letting them exploit me and waste my time.
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Myst
Building strong relationships seems to be the hardest one for me.
Nobody cares anymore.
Nobody is interested.
Approaching anybody gets you labelled as cringe.
Everybody has an alternate motive.
True friends barely ever exist anywhere anymore.
Scociety is tough.
I think being able to love yourself, be your best friend and live/stand on your own every now and again would be a better life lesson
But what do I know.
I'm 19.
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Building strong relationships seems to be the hardest one for me.
Nobody cares anymore.
Nobody is interested.
Approaching anybody gets you labelled as cringe.
Everybody has an alternate motive.
True friends barely ever exist anywhere anymore.
Scociety is tough.
I think being able to love yourself, be your best friend and live/stand on your own every now and again would be a better life lesson
But what do I know.
I'm 19.
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Pixel
My biggest life regret was giving a woman a chance that I never should've. I was barely 19. Maybe it was a good lesson but the mental damage was pretty bad. Since then I think I've dodged a lot of bullets. But I also never married, never had children and just can't trust women ever again. That leaves a big hole in your life. However I am grateful I have not had the experiences with women I've seen others go through. Some of them, really really bad.
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My biggest life regret was giving a woman a chance that I never should've. I was barely 19. Maybe it was a good lesson but the mental damage was pretty bad. Since then I think I've dodged a lot of bullets. But I also never married, never had children and just can't trust women ever again. That leaves a big hole in your life. However I am grateful I have not had the experiences with women I've seen others go through. Some of them, really really bad.
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7john7able
Sounds like good advice but really isn't. Let's make this simple. The only thing that makes you sad is comparing yourself to others and thinking about the past. So be the best YOU can be and plan for the future yes but make sure that you enjoy the day also.
That is it nothing else to remember. No 10 truths or anything else.
I am not a genius just quoting an ancient Greek philosopher who was. ( sorry can't remember which one it was )
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Sounds like good advice but really isn't. Let's make this simple. The only thing that makes you sad is comparing yourself to others and thinking about the past. So be the best YOU can be and plan for the future yes but make sure that you enjoy the day also.
That is it nothing else to remember. No 10 truths or anything else.
I am not a genius just quoting an ancient Greek philosopher who was. ( sorry can't remember which one it was )
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millertas
Cannot fault this video much if not at all. At 63 there were many paths I could have taken to be 'more successful' but who decides what success is? Don't let others dictate what your life should be. Live in the now. In 2019 my wife (of over 37 years) and I took the opportunity to do what we love - travel. So glad we did in hindsight as doors quickly shut in 2020.
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Cannot fault this video much if not at all. At 63 there were many paths I could have taken to be 'more successful' but who decides what success is? Don't let others dictate what your life should be. Live in the now. In 2019 my wife (of over 37 years) and I took the opportunity to do what we love - travel. So glad we did in hindsight as doors quickly shut in 2020.
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Rob
The saddest thing is coming to terms with the fact that our life is ( was ) not really the life as we wanted to be - - 2 nd saddest thing in life is knowing that some of us were born with flaws / shortcomings that cannot be rectify/change /explained which make us taking actions not understood by others. -it follows that
we disappoint people and
upset people
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The saddest thing is coming to terms with the fact that our life is ( was ) not really the life as we wanted to be - - 2 nd saddest thing in life is knowing that some of us were born with flaws / shortcomings that cannot be rectify/change /explained which make us taking actions not understood by others. -it follows that
we disappoint people and
upset people
reply
Adrian
It's a hollow, bitter, forlorn feeling to have Old Age infirmaries glom onto your body as your mind becomes thick & slow. To be alone, to struggle with a small fixed income, & to be relegated to insignificance. My mind thinks what was the GD point of this life of mine? It is the Nichiren Buddhist, mutual possession of the ten worlds & Dante's decent into hell.
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It's a hollow, bitter, forlorn feeling to have Old Age infirmaries glom onto your body as your mind becomes thick & slow. To be alone, to struggle with a small fixed income, & to be relegated to insignificance. My mind thinks what was the GD point of this life of mine? It is the Nichiren Buddhist, mutual possession of the ten worlds & Dante's decent into hell.
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Rena
It is a myth that material things can't bring you joy. Art and objects of great beauty, give me great joy. Money can bring you the ability to create gorgeous memories in travel and adventure that you can't do without money, and learn from history and from the material objectsof ancient times.
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It is a myth that material things can't bring you joy. Art and objects of great beauty, give me great joy. Money can bring you the ability to create gorgeous memories in travel and adventure that you can't do without money, and learn from history and from the material objectsof ancient times.
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Berenice
Im surprised how strong he is even if he is still not free of her.
Yes, you have to greve the loss of the woman you thought you where dating.
I hope you have moved on. She might be or not be narcissistic, but she does sound borderline. at the very least, very broken.
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Im surprised how strong he is even if he is still not free of her.
Yes, you have to greve the loss of the woman you thought you where dating.
I hope you have moved on. She might be or not be narcissistic, but she does sound borderline. at the very least, very broken.
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Retired
Hospice patients were asked about their greatest life regrets. The response that came up the most was, I wished I had not worried about what other people thought of me. Two others were, I wished I had traveled more and I wished I had kept in touch with old friends.
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Hospice patients were asked about their greatest life regrets. The response that came up the most was, I wished I had not worried about what other people thought of me. Two others were, I wished I had traveled more and I wished I had kept in touch with old friends.
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Adrian
There is NOTHING Wrong in being an Opportunist (Just NOT a Crass Opportnist. There is NOTHING Wrong with being Selfish (If I am not for myself, Who will be? If I am only for myself, What am I, a Jerk. How can one stay on their path if they are NOT somewhat selfish?
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There is NOTHING Wrong in being an Opportunist (Just NOT a Crass Opportnist. There is NOTHING Wrong with being Selfish (If I am not for myself, Who will be? If I am only for myself, What am I, a Jerk. How can one stay on their path if they are NOT somewhat selfish?
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Heinrich
Psych2Go ROCKS
IM ENROLLED
THANK YOU
VERY MUCH
FOR THE INSIGHTFUL DESCRIPTIONS ABOUT THE PSYCHOLOGY WITHIN LIFE.
THIS ONE
IS
GREAT.
Im Battling Depression
This
Episode HAS HELPED
THANK YOU.
reply
Psych2Go ROCKS
IM ENROLLED
THANK YOU
VERY MUCH
FOR THE INSIGHTFUL DESCRIPTIONS ABOUT THE PSYCHOLOGY WITHIN LIFE.
THIS ONE
IS
GREAT.
Im Battling Depression
This
Episode HAS HELPED
THANK YOU.
reply
eaz
for number 9 the first step is usually by far the hardest after that a project usually is smooth sailing of course that is if the project is something important to you that will give you enough motivation to finish it
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for number 9 the first step is usually by far the hardest after that a project usually is smooth sailing of course that is if the project is something important to you that will give you enough motivation to finish it
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george
The videos collectively are assisting me in my choices needing some third party comments. Common
wisdom imprinted help my steer
through my compulsive & disruptive
derailing brief events or courses.
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The videos collectively are assisting me in my choices needing some third party comments. Common
wisdom imprinted help my steer
through my compulsive & disruptive
derailing brief events or courses.
reply
weegie334
another one: Dont mind what people think. Ask yourself: do you remember more than 10 embarrassing moments about your friends. Probably not. So other people will also forget many of your flaws
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another one: Dont mind what people think. Ask yourself: do you remember more than 10 embarrassing moments about your friends. Probably not. So other people will also forget many of your flaws
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Keith
My biggest regret is not getting away from back stabbing so called family ' that was my problem my entire life ' they caused me an endless chain of events that caused my life to be a living hell.
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My biggest regret is not getting away from back stabbing so called family ' that was my problem my entire life ' they caused me an endless chain of events that caused my life to be a living hell.
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Francisco
How much time is giving up too quickly? Imagine a person in their 50s or 60s who have been trying to achieve something throughout their whole life and for some reason they still can't?
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How much time is giving up too quickly? Imagine a person in their 50s or 60s who have been trying to achieve something throughout their whole life and for some reason they still can't?
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Larry
Don't compare yourself to someone else. reality is you will never really know what you're comparing yourself too. Be cool to yourself and just do your best. nothing else you can do.
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Don't compare yourself to someone else. reality is you will never really know what you're comparing yourself too. Be cool to yourself and just do your best. nothing else you can do.
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Aonghus
How do half Of these videos help people who sincerely have NO FAMILY OR FRIENDS? I watch this a lot and the presumption were all have people in our life makes this harder to watch
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How do half Of these videos help people who sincerely have NO FAMILY OR FRIENDS? I watch this a lot and the presumption were all have people in our life makes this harder to watch
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Peggy
U have 5 new listeners cuz of me. Yay not that I want the pat on the back for getting you more listeners I want people to learn and grow and this is what you offer
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U have 5 new listeners cuz of me. Yay not that I want the pat on the back for getting you more listeners I want people to learn and grow and this is what you offer
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1unsung
Drinking a full glass of water with your meal dilutes stomach acid, thereby impairing digestion. Don't drink water with your meal. Bad advice.
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Drinking a full glass of water with your meal dilutes stomach acid, thereby impairing digestion. Don't drink water with your meal. Bad advice.
reply
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