THE tip for meeting women (yes, THE)
video description
Date: 2026-07-10
Related videos
Comments and reviews: 20
Mozza-07
I found a female friend once through an online business community. We met up on a video call weekly to talk accountability. It was a great time and we had a lot in common and laughed a lot. I knew she had a boyfriend quite early on, which made it easy for me to not consider her romantically.
But around half a year later, she started complaining about how her boyfriend treated her. She said multiple times that she wasn't sure how long her relationship was going to last. And that her boyfriend left her behind multiple times and how upset it made her. I didn't know what to do, but the comments and remarks kept coming and I said nothing
Because of those comments/hints, I developed feelings for her, then fought very hard to overcome those feelings. Thought I was in the clear. I saw her IRL for the 2nd time just as a friend and had a great time.
But before I left she jumped around my neck and we embraced for a very long time. My world went silent. I didn't want to let go but the hug went on for so long that I was the first to let go because it also kinda scared me
2 weeks later I confessed to her. Everything fell apart and we no longer talk.
7 months later everything triggers me and I'm on the edge of tears nearly every day. I'm depressed af and have spent thousands on therapy which hasn't worked. I've literally lost all hope.
--
I genuinely understand the premise of the video. But if the very thing I never thought was possible turned into hope but then still ended up as a complete lie, then there's no point
reply
I found a female friend once through an online business community. We met up on a video call weekly to talk accountability. It was a great time and we had a lot in common and laughed a lot. I knew she had a boyfriend quite early on, which made it easy for me to not consider her romantically.
But around half a year later, she started complaining about how her boyfriend treated her. She said multiple times that she wasn't sure how long her relationship was going to last. And that her boyfriend left her behind multiple times and how upset it made her. I didn't know what to do, but the comments and remarks kept coming and I said nothing
Because of those comments/hints, I developed feelings for her, then fought very hard to overcome those feelings. Thought I was in the clear. I saw her IRL for the 2nd time just as a friend and had a great time.
But before I left she jumped around my neck and we embraced for a very long time. My world went silent. I didn't want to let go but the hug went on for so long that I was the first to let go because it also kinda scared me
2 weeks later I confessed to her. Everything fell apart and we no longer talk.
7 months later everything triggers me and I'm on the edge of tears nearly every day. I'm depressed af and have spent thousands on therapy which hasn't worked. I've literally lost all hope.
--
I genuinely understand the premise of the video. But if the very thing I never thought was possible turned into hope but then still ended up as a complete lie, then there's no point
reply
tachytack
As glad as I am to see more people talking about this in a mature, reasonable manner, it always kind of annoys me how much the conversation misses the forest for the trees. As someone who finds himself feeling cripplingly alone, a lot of of what Adam said is advice that just applies to meeting people in general; go out there, make connections, treat people like people. I'm not as desperate for a girlfriend as much as I'm desperate for company, and it's an issue that I've seen grow more prevalent with time in both men and women; the thing about the male side of things is it's still very much not the norm to be vulnerable and what not, it's also just kind of a louder side (which does unfortunately include awful kinds of people. Don't get me wrong, people being exposed to such basic but fundamental advice is a very very good thing, I just wish we'd focus more on the treat people like people aspect and be louder about what I feel is the greater issue at hand, because it's affecting everyone.
reply
As glad as I am to see more people talking about this in a mature, reasonable manner, it always kind of annoys me how much the conversation misses the forest for the trees. As someone who finds himself feeling cripplingly alone, a lot of of what Adam said is advice that just applies to meeting people in general; go out there, make connections, treat people like people. I'm not as desperate for a girlfriend as much as I'm desperate for company, and it's an issue that I've seen grow more prevalent with time in both men and women; the thing about the male side of things is it's still very much not the norm to be vulnerable and what not, it's also just kind of a louder side (which does unfortunately include awful kinds of people. Don't get me wrong, people being exposed to such basic but fundamental advice is a very very good thing, I just wish we'd focus more on the treat people like people aspect and be louder about what I feel is the greater issue at hand, because it's affecting everyone.
reply
spencernewman7041
Pretty good video. Only part I broadly disagree with is that a most women feel perfectly comfortable making the first move these days. More so than in the past, sure. Even if women feel like socially there is nothing wrong with them doing so, there is a difference between them having that general opinion and that being something they would personally do and actually act on. Most don't for the same reasons many men don't. Nerves, social anxiety, fear of rejection or making a already sound friendship suddenly feel weird or uncomfortable. I guess my only point here is that if you are a guy, obviously try not to make women uncomfortable, but you still have to 'approach' women first these days, or at least make clear what your intent is/how you feel about them first. Waiting around hoping a woman will do that first will more than likely leave you single for a very long time.
reply
Pretty good video. Only part I broadly disagree with is that a most women feel perfectly comfortable making the first move these days. More so than in the past, sure. Even if women feel like socially there is nothing wrong with them doing so, there is a difference between them having that general opinion and that being something they would personally do and actually act on. Most don't for the same reasons many men don't. Nerves, social anxiety, fear of rejection or making a already sound friendship suddenly feel weird or uncomfortable. I guess my only point here is that if you are a guy, obviously try not to make women uncomfortable, but you still have to 'approach' women first these days, or at least make clear what your intent is/how you feel about them first. Waiting around hoping a woman will do that first will more than likely leave you single for a very long time.
reply
carolcyr8553
I'm not sure who will see this comment, as there are already 3, 560 comments here, but I would be careful in reading romance books, if you want to understand the kind of man a woman actually wants. I don't read the genre but I've read a bit about it, and from what I've heard, the men in those books aren't all good. The main romantic interest can be a controlling jerk, in a lot of cases. Not all. There's often a big difference between something a person will read and the kind of life they actually, in real life, want to live. Including the kind of partners they want.
One book / TV show that I get the feeling is showcasing a real good man is Outlander. I haven't read it but I did watch several episodes of the show, and Jamie seems really awesome. Strong but not distant or closed-off emotionally.
reply
I'm not sure who will see this comment, as there are already 3, 560 comments here, but I would be careful in reading romance books, if you want to understand the kind of man a woman actually wants. I don't read the genre but I've read a bit about it, and from what I've heard, the men in those books aren't all good. The main romantic interest can be a controlling jerk, in a lot of cases. Not all. There's often a big difference between something a person will read and the kind of life they actually, in real life, want to live. Including the kind of partners they want.
One book / TV show that I get the feeling is showcasing a real good man is Outlander. I haven't read it but I did watch several episodes of the show, and Jamie seems really awesome. Strong but not distant or closed-off emotionally.
reply
twerkingfish4029
As a young someone looking for a someone (idly, the only someone I have ever asked out was not an especially attractive, well dressed, intelligent, or wealthy person.
Being present in the world is a real thing. (Though the answer was no, but oh well.
I will admit, there is a definite bootstrap problem, as I'll call it, where the hardest part is actually being around others, and it's all the more frustrating letting it happen to myself, as I am just old enough to remember the shift from in person interaction to online interaction around about 2015/2016 at least in my own life.
I just hope there's a widespread power outage for a month during nationwide mild weather or something, to teach us all how to interact, since I don't know how we solve this (at scale, at least.
reply
As a young someone looking for a someone (idly, the only someone I have ever asked out was not an especially attractive, well dressed, intelligent, or wealthy person.
Being present in the world is a real thing. (Though the answer was no, but oh well.
I will admit, there is a definite bootstrap problem, as I'll call it, where the hardest part is actually being around others, and it's all the more frustrating letting it happen to myself, as I am just old enough to remember the shift from in person interaction to online interaction around about 2015/2016 at least in my own life.
I just hope there's a widespread power outage for a month during nationwide mild weather or something, to teach us all how to interact, since I don't know how we solve this (at scale, at least.
reply
TheeCatfreaky
I'm Gen Z and in a long term relationship for a few years now (under ten. And I completely agree with this video.
See and treat women as people. Have hobbies and interests. Enjoy life. Your number one goal shouldn't be I want a woman. Do things for yourself.
Yes, there is luck involved in clicking with someone too. But if you sit at home and are angry at women as a whole, you're chances are basically zero.
And the great thing is, if you enjoy yourself and allow yourself to enjoy things, it's not that big of a deal anymore, if you don't find anyone. You deserve to enjoy life no matter if you are in a relationship or not. Live your life,
be kind and respectful to yourself and others and maybe work on accepting your situation, it might help to change it.
reply
I'm Gen Z and in a long term relationship for a few years now (under ten. And I completely agree with this video.
See and treat women as people. Have hobbies and interests. Enjoy life. Your number one goal shouldn't be I want a woman. Do things for yourself.
Yes, there is luck involved in clicking with someone too. But if you sit at home and are angry at women as a whole, you're chances are basically zero.
And the great thing is, if you enjoy yourself and allow yourself to enjoy things, it's not that big of a deal anymore, if you don't find anyone. You deserve to enjoy life no matter if you are in a relationship or not. Live your life,
be kind and respectful to yourself and others and maybe work on accepting your situation, it might help to change it.
reply
SpadesHeart
I mostly agree with you, but some very slight pushback. Third spaces have been dwindling for a while, the staying inside and not living life phenomenon is societally self defeating. Secondly, homie is pulling up advice from his single days, for which he hasn't been single for 19 years. His claims of game are probably not currently relevant. His assertion of using romance novels to inform you on what women want. booktok, the current iteration of romance novels are deepling dehumanizing and somewhat problematic, if one were to act like anyone from one of those books it would be a problem lol. Things are a little different now. It's a little boomer providing employment advice adjacent.
reply
I mostly agree with you, but some very slight pushback. Third spaces have been dwindling for a while, the staying inside and not living life phenomenon is societally self defeating. Secondly, homie is pulling up advice from his single days, for which he hasn't been single for 19 years. His claims of game are probably not currently relevant. His assertion of using romance novels to inform you on what women want. booktok, the current iteration of romance novels are deepling dehumanizing and somewhat problematic, if one were to act like anyone from one of those books it would be a problem lol. Things are a little different now. It's a little boomer providing employment advice adjacent.
reply
0imaretard1230
Cooking has done nothing to attract a date. Women want someone that can get someone else to cook for them, be it through wealth or leverage of status. Cooking is a low status activity, effective only as a novelty or to LARP as a high status man that is willing to temporarily humble himself in service of a woman that he finds compelling enough to do so. Rest assured, cooking in isolation will not only not move the needle in attracting a woman (or any other gender of mate) but has the effect of cementing yourself as low status (no woman wants to date a line cook, just the wealthy guy that pays said cook to make the food. The 'help' so to speak.
reply
Cooking has done nothing to attract a date. Women want someone that can get someone else to cook for them, be it through wealth or leverage of status. Cooking is a low status activity, effective only as a novelty or to LARP as a high status man that is willing to temporarily humble himself in service of a woman that he finds compelling enough to do so. Rest assured, cooking in isolation will not only not move the needle in attracting a woman (or any other gender of mate) but has the effect of cementing yourself as low status (no woman wants to date a line cook, just the wealthy guy that pays said cook to make the food. The 'help' so to speak.
reply
glitchyglitch1235
FIND the third place for yourself. I myself am incredibly lucky that I live in a country where these are fairly common and I do a sport that has a lot of women my age involved, even tho I am a chronically anxious individual, I've had plenty of women be OPENLY interested in me. There's plenty of people that don't live on the internet. Trust me. Get off the PC and go out, find a hobby, a friend group, anything where you can meet other people, not just women. SOCIALIZE, and socialize because once you get through the first few mental levels of it it's really fun actually.
reply
FIND the third place for yourself. I myself am incredibly lucky that I live in a country where these are fairly common and I do a sport that has a lot of women my age involved, even tho I am a chronically anxious individual, I've had plenty of women be OPENLY interested in me. There's plenty of people that don't live on the internet. Trust me. Get off the PC and go out, find a hobby, a friend group, anything where you can meet other people, not just women. SOCIALIZE, and socialize because once you get through the first few mental levels of it it's really fun actually.
reply
Velzizar
The book advice sounds interesting, and also there are a lot of book boyfriend characterizations that seems like should not be followed. How do you determine if a depiction of romance you read about is what women want in real life, and what they only enjoy reading about and fantasizing about I have heard from some women the comment I really crush on this type of fantasy man, but if someone acted like this towards me in real life, I wouldn't touch them with a 10 foot pole. It seems easy to either model the wrong fantasy, or dismiss the right fantasy because it sound wrong.
reply
The book advice sounds interesting, and also there are a lot of book boyfriend characterizations that seems like should not be followed. How do you determine if a depiction of romance you read about is what women want in real life, and what they only enjoy reading about and fantasizing about I have heard from some women the comment I really crush on this type of fantasy man, but if someone acted like this towards me in real life, I wouldn't touch them with a 10 foot pole. It seems easy to either model the wrong fantasy, or dismiss the right fantasy because it sound wrong.
reply
aragusea
Adam, this is all great advice for guys that are already fairly conventionally attractive. I've been friends with many women, dressed and groomed well, had funny interesting stories to tell but I've been fat all my adult and teenage life. None of those friendships ever amounted to anything cause I would quickly realize that they were in situationships or crushing on less interesting men but more attractive men.
Again I think you give good advice to the guy who is attractive but can't seem to stick any dates or relationships.
reply
Adam, this is all great advice for guys that are already fairly conventionally attractive. I've been friends with many women, dressed and groomed well, had funny interesting stories to tell but I've been fat all my adult and teenage life. None of those friendships ever amounted to anything cause I would quickly realize that they were in situationships or crushing on less interesting men but more attractive men.
Again I think you give good advice to the guy who is attractive but can't seem to stick any dates or relationships.
reply
tsuyoshiwu3073
Based on my recent experiences, I've learned that women tend to be attracted to someone who seems safe and reliable to be around. To each to their own, everyone has their preferences on income, height, ethnicity, faith, etc, but the right one usually shows up when you're just minding your own business. The right person will also approach you, embracing your imperfections and celebrating your strengths. They care about the future with the person they'll be for rest of their lives, and they want to be safe.
reply
Based on my recent experiences, I've learned that women tend to be attracted to someone who seems safe and reliable to be around. To each to their own, everyone has their preferences on income, height, ethnicity, faith, etc, but the right one usually shows up when you're just minding your own business. The right person will also approach you, embracing your imperfections and celebrating your strengths. They care about the future with the person they'll be for rest of their lives, and they want to be safe.
reply
N00G13
Something so weird about being tall is that I’m constantly told that it’s like the cheat code to success with women. It’s quite the opposite, I’m like a ginormous mountain no one tries to climb because they feel it’s too intimidating. I’ve asked girls why they didn’t talk to me sooner, and they all say it was too intimidating, you’re so tall. You’d be surprised how many tall men and women live this lonely life where it seems no one likes them.
reply
Something so weird about being tall is that I’m constantly told that it’s like the cheat code to success with women. It’s quite the opposite, I’m like a ginormous mountain no one tries to climb because they feel it’s too intimidating. I’ve asked girls why they didn’t talk to me sooner, and they all say it was too intimidating, you’re so tall. You’d be surprised how many tall men and women live this lonely life where it seems no one likes them.
reply
whitewolf6686
Have you read any of those smut novels Adam You are so out touch and detached from reality.
You should ask your wifes boyfriend to get you some because if we do the things in those books we would surely end up in jail.
Because we are not tall, billionare, vampire, werewolves.
It is only romantic when Christian Grey does those things. He is a tall billionare.
Entire video is just a straw man where you reflect your own mind onto others.
reply
Have you read any of those smut novels Adam You are so out touch and detached from reality.
You should ask your wifes boyfriend to get you some because if we do the things in those books we would surely end up in jail.
Because we are not tall, billionare, vampire, werewolves.
It is only romantic when Christian Grey does those things. He is a tall billionare.
Entire video is just a straw man where you reflect your own mind onto others.
reply
ghijcamp
I was friends with so many women, where we had an obvious spark between us.
There you go, that's not friends, friends are platonic, no spark. Spark=friend zone, at least one party left wanting. Men and women can't really be friends.
Women say being approached is harassment, it's not bullsht. When someone tells you who they are, believe them.
Romance novels The love interest is a vampire.
reply
I was friends with so many women, where we had an obvious spark between us.
There you go, that's not friends, friends are platonic, no spark. Spark=friend zone, at least one party left wanting. Men and women can't really be friends.
Women say being approached is harassment, it's not bullsht. When someone tells you who they are, believe them.
Romance novels The love interest is a vampire.
reply
dariusz. 9119
Here is the advice to the guys - take dancing lessons. Preferably Salsa or Bachata. I am not saying you should pick up girls there. But if you want to meet a girl the easiest thing you can do is to dance and have fun with girls during house parties, birthdays, BBQs and concerts (but not clubs) and then have balls to ask for a number when you see you both are having fun with each other
reply
Here is the advice to the guys - take dancing lessons. Preferably Salsa or Bachata. I am not saying you should pick up girls there. But if you want to meet a girl the easiest thing you can do is to dance and have fun with girls during house parties, birthdays, BBQs and concerts (but not clubs) and then have balls to ask for a number when you see you both are having fun with each other
reply
blarghblargh
this is the advice. it's been the advice. thanks for using your platform to make the advice clear.
it's not a fad or crash diet version of the advice. it's the balanced lifestyle version of living with other humans.
hopefully people who are in most need of this advice are able to take a step back and see that it is still solid, even when it doesn't give instantaneous results.
reply
this is the advice. it's been the advice. thanks for using your platform to make the advice clear.
it's not a fad or crash diet version of the advice. it's the balanced lifestyle version of living with other humans.
hopefully people who are in most need of this advice are able to take a step back and see that it is still solid, even when it doesn't give instantaneous results.
reply
shale-ra
I have loved shorter guys for forever. I dated one tall dude and my neck was so strained just interacting regularly with him that I was very happy to end it after a few months also, no lie but shorter guys tend to try harder with their health and appearance, and also are statistically more likely to treat me like a full human being and not a conquest in my experience.
reply
I have loved shorter guys for forever. I dated one tall dude and my neck was so strained just interacting regularly with him that I was very happy to end it after a few months also, no lie but shorter guys tend to try harder with their health and appearance, and also are statistically more likely to treat me like a full human being and not a conquest in my experience.
reply
camogust
Started acting like a romance novel love interest and it is not working tbh. The shop owner did not appreciate my cold, detached demeanor nor did they allow me to light up a cigarette. It may have gone better if I had the chance to reveal my backstory but I think the women were scared when I was scowling at them.
reply
Started acting like a romance novel love interest and it is not working tbh. The shop owner did not appreciate my cold, detached demeanor nor did they allow me to light up a cigarette. It may have gone better if I had the chance to reveal my backstory but I think the women were scared when I was scowling at them.
reply
classicpinball9873
If everyone followed the advice of don't flirt & let her make the first move, the vast majority of relationships would never exist lmao.
Actually even if she is making the first move, not flirting would be seen as you not showing interest so there'd be even less reason for her to ask you first.
reply
If everyone followed the advice of don't flirt & let her make the first move, the vast majority of relationships would never exist lmao.
Actually even if she is making the first move, not flirting would be seen as you not showing interest so there'd be even less reason for her to ask you first.
reply
Add a review, comment
Other channel videos
