5 Ways to Talk about Depression with Your Parents
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Date: 2023-08-20
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Comments and reviews: 25
Matty
My parents were supportive of me during my battle with depression until the day it reached the point where I couldn't even muster up the will to get out of bed, much less hold a job; and I had to turn to them for financial assistance. Then it became you're just being lazy and you need to snap out of this right now and get your act together or you're gonna be homeless because we're tired of this. Real reassuring, huh? If it were that simple, I'd have done it long before I became financially dependent on them again. I didn't end up becoming homeless, but I did end up moving back in with them and it was a total nightmare. I was hit constantly with verbal attacks along the lines of 27 years old living with mommy and daddy because you're too lazy to do anything for yourself etc. The first time I asked them for rent money they took an immediate 180 that they never backed off of. I probably would've been better off homeless. Thank God I finally got the treatment I needed after over a year of living with them. The fact of the matter is that someone who has never experienced clinical depression themselves or at least studied it deeply is 100% incapable of understanding that this is anything other than a case of the blues that everyone snaps out of in time. If you do not receive treatment before it gets to the point where it is now personally affecting your loved ones, you will see the support and encouragement they previously offered devolve into toxic anger and hostility in an instant. Now that that horrible part of my life is over, I have tried to forgive them completely but have been unable to do so. I still feel that they value their money that they don't even need over my life; and they still really don't believe that I was ever mentally ill, I just went through a phase of extreme laziness and didn't want to do anything for a few years.
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My parents were supportive of me during my battle with depression until the day it reached the point where I couldn't even muster up the will to get out of bed, much less hold a job; and I had to turn to them for financial assistance. Then it became you're just being lazy and you need to snap out of this right now and get your act together or you're gonna be homeless because we're tired of this. Real reassuring, huh? If it were that simple, I'd have done it long before I became financially dependent on them again. I didn't end up becoming homeless, but I did end up moving back in with them and it was a total nightmare. I was hit constantly with verbal attacks along the lines of 27 years old living with mommy and daddy because you're too lazy to do anything for yourself etc. The first time I asked them for rent money they took an immediate 180 that they never backed off of. I probably would've been better off homeless. Thank God I finally got the treatment I needed after over a year of living with them. The fact of the matter is that someone who has never experienced clinical depression themselves or at least studied it deeply is 100% incapable of understanding that this is anything other than a case of the blues that everyone snaps out of in time. If you do not receive treatment before it gets to the point where it is now personally affecting your loved ones, you will see the support and encouragement they previously offered devolve into toxic anger and hostility in an instant. Now that that horrible part of my life is over, I have tried to forgive them completely but have been unable to do so. I still feel that they value their money that they don't even need over my life; and they still really don't believe that I was ever mentally ill, I just went through a phase of extreme laziness and didn't want to do anything for a few years.
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Lilacc
Parent's pov: -
-If I can't control anymore and cry, then I am just emotional and a cry baby who cry for no reason.
-If I feel pain in my head and body, then I am lazy.
-If I don't eat properly, then it's okay I'll loose some weight.
-If I don't go out with friends and dont talk with them on phone, then very good no need anyways.
-If I don't talk with them bcs I don't want to interact with anyone, then I am a ungrateful kid who is ignoring them and then they threat me that they will start doing the same, they can surely do, not like I myself want to interact.
-still I gather myself up and decide to interact after a lot of thought, then what happens, unnecessary taunts, finding my faults in literally everything, and that confidence went more down, that next time it took way more efforts.
-as for my anxiety, they think it is because of coffee, okay I know coffee creates issue but not like I consume too much. once or twice a week won't harm that much to cause me anxiety and underconfidence.
-If I want to join sports activity, then I will just waste time I should study and clear iit.
F IIT. DOES MY CHOICE EVEN MATTER
And then you say they will understand. They could have understood after so many signs.
No, they won't think it's their fault in my depression, they will not even consider it as an illness and will blame me for being lazy, ungrateful, who think unnecessary stuffs.
They won't understand until a stage they won't be able to do anything and just regret.
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Parent's pov: -
-If I can't control anymore and cry, then I am just emotional and a cry baby who cry for no reason.
-If I feel pain in my head and body, then I am lazy.
-If I don't eat properly, then it's okay I'll loose some weight.
-If I don't go out with friends and dont talk with them on phone, then very good no need anyways.
-If I don't talk with them bcs I don't want to interact with anyone, then I am a ungrateful kid who is ignoring them and then they threat me that they will start doing the same, they can surely do, not like I myself want to interact.
-still I gather myself up and decide to interact after a lot of thought, then what happens, unnecessary taunts, finding my faults in literally everything, and that confidence went more down, that next time it took way more efforts.
-as for my anxiety, they think it is because of coffee, okay I know coffee creates issue but not like I consume too much. once or twice a week won't harm that much to cause me anxiety and underconfidence.
-If I want to join sports activity, then I will just waste time I should study and clear iit.
F IIT. DOES MY CHOICE EVEN MATTER
And then you say they will understand. They could have understood after so many signs.
No, they won't think it's their fault in my depression, they will not even consider it as an illness and will blame me for being lazy, ungrateful, who think unnecessary stuffs.
They won't understand until a stage they won't be able to do anything and just regret.
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education
I mentioned it to my mom once, she said my generation is sensitive and that I dont have a reason to be depressed. She says I dont need therapy unless I go through an actual traumatic experience ( not mentally. I tried talking to her but she just said everyone goes through it and you just need to get over it.
Another thing is that I tried talking to her about me being scared about being around people and she says you need to get over your weird people phase. And every time I have a straight face or Im just relaxing, she chuckles and says stop acting like that, and treats me like Im trying to avoid something. In public when I have a straight face she tells me to act happier because I am an actor. I can never show how I really feel without her just avoiding giving me help other than talking about getting therapy for her and my stepdad, I talked to her about giving me therapy but, she said only when an actual traumatic experience happens and that its too expensive. Like, if I personally think i need help, then figure out a way to give me it. The only person I can really talk to is my dad but I rarely see him.
Idk what to do
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I mentioned it to my mom once, she said my generation is sensitive and that I dont have a reason to be depressed. She says I dont need therapy unless I go through an actual traumatic experience ( not mentally. I tried talking to her but she just said everyone goes through it and you just need to get over it.
Another thing is that I tried talking to her about me being scared about being around people and she says you need to get over your weird people phase. And every time I have a straight face or Im just relaxing, she chuckles and says stop acting like that, and treats me like Im trying to avoid something. In public when I have a straight face she tells me to act happier because I am an actor. I can never show how I really feel without her just avoiding giving me help other than talking about getting therapy for her and my stepdad, I talked to her about giving me therapy but, she said only when an actual traumatic experience happens and that its too expensive. Like, if I personally think i need help, then figure out a way to give me it. The only person I can really talk to is my dad but I rarely see him.
Idk what to do
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sydney
Ok so in the last couple months ive gotten in some intense arguments with my mom. i love her but i dont think she understands that im not ok. shes said in those arguments that she can get me consoling, and my dumbass has said no all those times. i want to ask her for help. heres what i'd plan to say.
Me: Mom, i want to talk. i would like to go to consoling. i dont want you to ask why, but i think i have adhd, and insert brother's name here and dad have it, which means that im more likely to have it. if it's not adhd, something else id wrong, b/c i've been having mood swings, depression, and a hard time remembering who i am. all im asking for for now is to try to get me professionally diagnosed. thank you for listening.
after typing this out i realize that i'd tear up trying to say it in peron and i couldn't explain the exact details without crying. if i do ask for help, then it's gonna be over text. thank you.
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Ok so in the last couple months ive gotten in some intense arguments with my mom. i love her but i dont think she understands that im not ok. shes said in those arguments that she can get me consoling, and my dumbass has said no all those times. i want to ask her for help. heres what i'd plan to say.
Me: Mom, i want to talk. i would like to go to consoling. i dont want you to ask why, but i think i have adhd, and insert brother's name here and dad have it, which means that im more likely to have it. if it's not adhd, something else id wrong, b/c i've been having mood swings, depression, and a hard time remembering who i am. all im asking for for now is to try to get me professionally diagnosed. thank you for listening.
after typing this out i realize that i'd tear up trying to say it in peron and i couldn't explain the exact details without crying. if i do ask for help, then it's gonna be over text. thank you.
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Aiko
I had an argument with my parents. I was so hurt to the point i confessed to them about my feelings and how i feel so heartbroken from them, I went through childhood trauma. My mother got so angry and she pulled my hair and slapped my face and punched my back. My father also got angry and started calling me things. At that point i wanted to disappear. My father made a joke about bringing me to a mental hospital, cuz there was one near our house. He said, You belong in a mental hospital. My heart broke into a million pieces. I was so tired and exhausted. I wanted to run away and disappear. From now, i learned not to open up to someone. I hate everything. No one in my life will understand me. They don't even try to make effort in understanding how i feel and what i went through. I hate my parents. But i love them at the same time. I just wish i had a happy childhood. Who knows who i am today.
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I had an argument with my parents. I was so hurt to the point i confessed to them about my feelings and how i feel so heartbroken from them, I went through childhood trauma. My mother got so angry and she pulled my hair and slapped my face and punched my back. My father also got angry and started calling me things. At that point i wanted to disappear. My father made a joke about bringing me to a mental hospital, cuz there was one near our house. He said, You belong in a mental hospital. My heart broke into a million pieces. I was so tired and exhausted. I wanted to run away and disappear. From now, i learned not to open up to someone. I hate everything. No one in my life will understand me. They don't even try to make effort in understanding how i feel and what i went through. I hate my parents. But i love them at the same time. I just wish i had a happy childhood. Who knows who i am today.
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Lucy_GamerX
I have adhd ocd odd depression and anxiety and I need to have confidence to tell my parents what I go through they know I'm 100% diagnosed with it all but they just let me sit there and I'm turning into a broken bridge And hanging on the bridge is my only hope I am a bit to young of what I am going through it is all ages but my parents already know but they think I am doing it myself and they get mad and raise their house at me for somthing I can't do like closing my mouth and not talking I am just needing somebody to actually have my attention And care and help me but inside and out my problems are 100% Sucure right were they are they ain't leaving it is impossible for me to be recovored but they only way is to have my dream parents
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I have adhd ocd odd depression and anxiety and I need to have confidence to tell my parents what I go through they know I'm 100% diagnosed with it all but they just let me sit there and I'm turning into a broken bridge And hanging on the bridge is my only hope I am a bit to young of what I am going through it is all ages but my parents already know but they think I am doing it myself and they get mad and raise their house at me for somthing I can't do like closing my mouth and not talking I am just needing somebody to actually have my attention And care and help me but inside and out my problems are 100% Sucure right were they are they ain't leaving it is impossible for me to be recovored but they only way is to have my dream parents
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cOfFeE
I tried, I really did but-
They ignore
Then again I tried
They said It's just in your head
Then again I tried
My mom kept ignoring me but my dad said that yeah i Will take you to doctor
I brought it up for about 10 times now but he has been delaying all the times and ignoring it
Then just a while ago I tried again he snapped at me so did my mom and told me you are being dramatic and attention seeker, you are just making excuses for not doing good in studies. You know why are you depressed if you really think you are it's because of you wasting your time on useless things(which is me working on my artist things, I just take 2 hours out of whole day for it. I study for about 10 hours)
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I tried, I really did but-
They ignore
Then again I tried
They said It's just in your head
Then again I tried
My mom kept ignoring me but my dad said that yeah i Will take you to doctor
I brought it up for about 10 times now but he has been delaying all the times and ignoring it
Then just a while ago I tried again he snapped at me so did my mom and told me you are being dramatic and attention seeker, you are just making excuses for not doing good in studies. You know why are you depressed if you really think you are it's because of you wasting your time on useless things(which is me working on my artist things, I just take 2 hours out of whole day for it. I study for about 10 hours)
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Sad
At my old school I had really good friends, but I moved a little while later. I never realized how lucky I was being at that old school with all my old friends. Every night I cry and cry thinking Im worthless and nothing matters in the first place. I try to talk to my parents abt it and its cause Im always on that Xbox everyone has their distractions but mine was playing video games it made me feel like all the stress and tension going on melted away. But as soon as my parents noticed I was playing a lot more they take it away. I try to explain that it takes my mind off things and all they do is laugh. Straight to my face. Before my eyes I am isolated and alone. This will never go away
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At my old school I had really good friends, but I moved a little while later. I never realized how lucky I was being at that old school with all my old friends. Every night I cry and cry thinking Im worthless and nothing matters in the first place. I try to talk to my parents abt it and its cause Im always on that Xbox everyone has their distractions but mine was playing video games it made me feel like all the stress and tension going on melted away. But as soon as my parents noticed I was playing a lot more they take it away. I try to explain that it takes my mind off things and all they do is laugh. Straight to my face. Before my eyes I am isolated and alone. This will never go away
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mahabub
I was diagnosis with MDD (major depressive disorder)
Today I tried to talk about it to my parents but it didn't help, they were like I have everything why would I be depressed: ) I am so happy and fine I don't have any reason or symptoms to be depressed and saying my doctor diagnosed wrong. I tried to explain them but they were blaming me saying that it's my fault I have depression I. Don't knw what to do i feel awful. Now I feel so awkward that I told them about my illness: )
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I was diagnosis with MDD (major depressive disorder)
Today I tried to talk about it to my parents but it didn't help, they were like I have everything why would I be depressed: ) I am so happy and fine I don't have any reason or symptoms to be depressed and saying my doctor diagnosed wrong. I tried to explain them but they were blaming me saying that it's my fault I have depression I. Don't knw what to do i feel awful. Now I feel so awkward that I told them about my illness: )
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carriva
A part of me really wants to just blurt out I'm depressed to my family but another part of me is afraid of burdening them and getting responses like You have no reason to be depressed, Stop being so sensitive. I love my family but I wish I can just tell them my feelings and problems without being judged too harshly or being laughed at. I always feel like I'm alone even when I'm with them. I'm afraid I'm just acting like a victim so I don't tell them. I just don't know what to do
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A part of me really wants to just blurt out I'm depressed to my family but another part of me is afraid of burdening them and getting responses like You have no reason to be depressed, Stop being so sensitive. I love my family but I wish I can just tell them my feelings and problems without being judged too harshly or being laughed at. I always feel like I'm alone even when I'm with them. I'm afraid I'm just acting like a victim so I don't tell them. I just don't know what to do
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Julia
I told my mom and she said everyone goes through it sometimes, and to watch the music I listen to. I mean, I get that everyone probably goes through it once in their life, I think theres a difference between a one time and an actual problem about it. And even if its not different, that doesnt mean I dont need help, right? (The part that hurts the most is the fact she didnt even mention the fact I told her I was self harming and having really bad suicidal thoughts)
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I told my mom and she said everyone goes through it sometimes, and to watch the music I listen to. I mean, I get that everyone probably goes through it once in their life, I think theres a difference between a one time and an actual problem about it. And even if its not different, that doesnt mean I dont need help, right? (The part that hurts the most is the fact she didnt even mention the fact I told her I was self harming and having really bad suicidal thoughts)
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Sarah
I dont know how to speak up about depression. yesterday only my father scolded me for not studying and being on bed waking up late and I was so stressed about that and today I didnt went to school because of that stress I have so many symptoms of depression but Im just trying to hide them as much as I can but I feel after watching this video I should tell my mother what Im feeling lately and I think I am in depression
I am just the worse of me right now
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I dont know how to speak up about depression. yesterday only my father scolded me for not studying and being on bed waking up late and I was so stressed about that and today I didnt went to school because of that stress I have so many symptoms of depression but Im just trying to hide them as much as I can but I feel after watching this video I should tell my mother what Im feeling lately and I think I am in depression
I am just the worse of me right now
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Infinite
Im here couse I do it wrong
I send her a messages, What I expect from her and what I feel
And. She didn't respond
My sister told me that she was crying. I think I do a mistake. She said that she want to talk with me, that she want to confide in to her. But now. When I did. I think thats wrong to talking about
Im already a burden. A problem for her. What should I do know?
I just don't know and I am not strong enough.
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Im here couse I do it wrong
I send her a messages, What I expect from her and what I feel
And. She didn't respond
My sister told me that she was crying. I think I do a mistake. She said that she want to talk with me, that she want to confide in to her. But now. When I did. I think thats wrong to talking about
Im already a burden. A problem for her. What should I do know?
I just don't know and I am not strong enough.
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Athena
i don't have a close relationship with my parents and they are not that kind of people who believe teenagers can have mental illnesses or problems. taking to them for such an important thing is like dying to me, hardest thing I can do. i can't talk to any adult around me either. no one takes it seriously and I'm tired of acting like i am happy, like i don't have the kill yourself sound in my head and that scars in my body
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i don't have a close relationship with my parents and they are not that kind of people who believe teenagers can have mental illnesses or problems. taking to them for such an important thing is like dying to me, hardest thing I can do. i can't talk to any adult around me either. no one takes it seriously and I'm tired of acting like i am happy, like i don't have the kill yourself sound in my head and that scars in my body
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Nyx
my parents would never believe me. they'd say I do it for the attention or that it's all in my head, and they'd definitely say that I have absolutely no reason to be depressed. also. a large part of my mental health issues are due to my sister, and my parents would never believe that because they never see the things that she does. also, I want to want help. but I don't want help at the same time. idk what to do anymore
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my parents would never believe me. they'd say I do it for the attention or that it's all in my head, and they'd definitely say that I have absolutely no reason to be depressed. also. a large part of my mental health issues are due to my sister, and my parents would never believe that because they never see the things that she does. also, I want to want help. but I don't want help at the same time. idk what to do anymore
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Louise
Its sad that most parents dont even understand kids and that they dont even try to help them they only say stuff like:
If u have no reason to be depressed then ur not depressed
Or I have been through more then u so stop with this dramatic stuff they even say taht u need to tell them what is happening when u look sad even tho u already know their gonna judge u cuz they dont think u have depression cuz ur a kid
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Its sad that most parents dont even understand kids and that they dont even try to help them they only say stuff like:
If u have no reason to be depressed then ur not depressed
Or I have been through more then u so stop with this dramatic stuff they even say taht u need to tell them what is happening when u look sad even tho u already know their gonna judge u cuz they dont think u have depression cuz ur a kid
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Xoexxoex
when my mother finds out that I have depression she told me I was crazy instead of helping she beat and slap me she said why are you depress we give everything to you. you eat 3 times a day (I have ED) you have your own room etc
she always say to me that I wish you I never had you. why do you cut yourself do you want me to cut it for you. wow my life is perfect ( dont mind my grammar)
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when my mother finds out that I have depression she told me I was crazy instead of helping she beat and slap me she said why are you depress we give everything to you. you eat 3 times a day (I have ED) you have your own room etc
she always say to me that I wish you I never had you. why do you cut yourself do you want me to cut it for you. wow my life is perfect ( dont mind my grammar)
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Dark
I tried telling my mother about feeling depression, however she did not help a bit. She told me to watch funny videos, use chakras to help me snap out of it, which of course laughing doesn't get rid of your depression, its only a distraction to stay out of my mind. And crystals don't really work when it comes to mental health.
What should I do
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I tried telling my mother about feeling depression, however she did not help a bit. She told me to watch funny videos, use chakras to help me snap out of it, which of course laughing doesn't get rid of your depression, its only a distraction to stay out of my mind. And crystals don't really work when it comes to mental health.
What should I do
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Moto
Ive been going threw depression for 8 years straight even though people see me smiling laughing Im hurting inside idk why I been wanting to talk to my parents for a long time about it just I freak out inside thean change my mind before I even ask to talk I want talk to them just I get overwhelmed in my head trying to find the courage to do it
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Ive been going threw depression for 8 years straight even though people see me smiling laughing Im hurting inside idk why I been wanting to talk to my parents for a long time about it just I freak out inside thean change my mind before I even ask to talk I want talk to them just I get overwhelmed in my head trying to find the courage to do it
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Kunal
I am BTECH student. I am 19 years old.
I have not studied end sem exam and I do not understand how to do it and I know I am going to fail so I always think of committing suicide. There are thoughts of ending this life. I can't tell my family. Suggest me what to do.
please i need help.
I think this is the last step.
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I am BTECH student. I am 19 years old.
I have not studied end sem exam and I do not understand how to do it and I know I am going to fail so I always think of committing suicide. There are thoughts of ending this life. I can't tell my family. Suggest me what to do.
please i need help.
I think this is the last step.
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Strawberry
I dont know how I should tell her what is every time I tell her she always jocks Around saying I also had it wenn I was your age its just a Phase so Ill try to ignore the signs and pretend like nothing is happening to me but now Im so tired and dont know how to cope with it so I try to keep it to myselfwat Should I do?
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I dont know how I should tell her what is every time I tell her she always jocks Around saying I also had it wenn I was your age its just a Phase so Ill try to ignore the signs and pretend like nothing is happening to me but now Im so tired and dont know how to cope with it so I try to keep it to myselfwat Should I do?
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Strawberry
I dont know how I should tell her what is every time I tell her she always jocks Around saying I also had it wenn I was your age its just a Phase so Ill try to ignore the signs and pretend like nothing is happening to me but now Im so tired and dont know how to cope with it so I try to keep it to myselfwat Should I do?
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I dont know how I should tell her what is every time I tell her she always jocks Around saying I also had it wenn I was your age its just a Phase so Ill try to ignore the signs and pretend like nothing is happening to me but now Im so tired and dont know how to cope with it so I try to keep it to myselfwat Should I do?
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f.
All these comments are scaring me, I'm really sorry so many people have such kind of parents who don't give a damn about their kid's mental health Idk how to start a conversation with them I'm scared what if they turned out to be one of these parents who don't really thinks of their kid's mental health as a important issue
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All these comments are scaring me, I'm really sorry so many people have such kind of parents who don't give a damn about their kid's mental health Idk how to start a conversation with them I'm scared what if they turned out to be one of these parents who don't really thinks of their kid's mental health as a important issue
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Bitoy
You're lazy.
Get over it.
You're wrong.
All this, after my mom asked me to open up.
I'm not afraid of telling my parents about my depression because they might blame it on themselves. I'm afraid of telling my parents about my depression because they have ALWAYS blamed it on me, and told me it's my fault.
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You're lazy.
Get over it.
You're wrong.
All this, after my mom asked me to open up.
I'm not afraid of telling my parents about my depression because they might blame it on themselves. I'm afraid of telling my parents about my depression because they have ALWAYS blamed it on me, and told me it's my fault.
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Sacabambaspis
I feel like I cant reach to my parents because my dad sorta feels unattached to me and usually my mom takes dads side, the school counselor trys to help but always tries to bring up talking to my parents. I cant talk to anyone and I feel like the world is closing around me and strangaling me, I need help
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I feel like I cant reach to my parents because my dad sorta feels unattached to me and usually my mom takes dads side, the school counselor trys to help but always tries to bring up talking to my parents. I cant talk to anyone and I feel like the world is closing around me and strangaling me, I need help
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