7 Ways Childhood Trauma Follow You Into Adulthood
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Date: 2023-08-20
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Comments and reviews: 25
reema
tw// alcohol & parental abuse
im 15 years old, and my father has a huge alcohol problem + temper issues
my mother takes math classes for children, and one of the students was home yesterday, and he started throwing shoes at my mother in front of the student. he quit the next day
he has met with so many accidents, he has even been arrested before. but he always comes out the next day. he has choked my elder sister to get to my mum's phone, he uses HORRIBLE language at us. i knew almost every swear word by the time i was 9
he has pulled my mother by her necklace, he has torn all of my mother's certificates when i was 10 so she doesnt do anything.
he threw books at me and my sister just 2 days ago because we locked the door and sat inside. she had her uni exams and had to study and i was doing my assignment. he as put us through so much, and i really do not know why my mother still hasnt left him. one day last month i woke up at 4am to the noises of my father hitting my mum with a broomstick and my sister pulling him back. i am so tired of this, and i have opened up to 3 of my best friends so far, and none of them understand me at all.
the first person i told it to, she was like yeah even my parents fight! like this is not the same thing?
the other two they did listen to me but they dont understand. like whenever i talk to them about it they just never understand the full extent of what im going through? im not trying to play victim here or anything but it really is so annoying when u dont have anybody who gets you. everybody think they have problems that are bigger. like ur father didnt buy u that new phone so u have depression? u failed an exam and now u have anxiety issues?
idk why im even putting this here i just really hope there is atleast somebody out there who understands and relates to what im going through
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tw// alcohol & parental abuse
im 15 years old, and my father has a huge alcohol problem + temper issues
my mother takes math classes for children, and one of the students was home yesterday, and he started throwing shoes at my mother in front of the student. he quit the next day
he has met with so many accidents, he has even been arrested before. but he always comes out the next day. he has choked my elder sister to get to my mum's phone, he uses HORRIBLE language at us. i knew almost every swear word by the time i was 9
he has pulled my mother by her necklace, he has torn all of my mother's certificates when i was 10 so she doesnt do anything.
he threw books at me and my sister just 2 days ago because we locked the door and sat inside. she had her uni exams and had to study and i was doing my assignment. he as put us through so much, and i really do not know why my mother still hasnt left him. one day last month i woke up at 4am to the noises of my father hitting my mum with a broomstick and my sister pulling him back. i am so tired of this, and i have opened up to 3 of my best friends so far, and none of them understand me at all.
the first person i told it to, she was like yeah even my parents fight! like this is not the same thing?
the other two they did listen to me but they dont understand. like whenever i talk to them about it they just never understand the full extent of what im going through? im not trying to play victim here or anything but it really is so annoying when u dont have anybody who gets you. everybody think they have problems that are bigger. like ur father didnt buy u that new phone so u have depression? u failed an exam and now u have anxiety issues?
idk why im even putting this here i just really hope there is atleast somebody out there who understands and relates to what im going through
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Jamail
Im 31 now but I was 12 when my parents got divorced.
To make a long story short: I for longest time blamed myself for it.
(While I later heard from my mom he was cheatig)
Thinking I wasnt good enough because she also lashed out all her anger/sadness and pain on me.
I was 16 when my mom told me what really happened. (I started blaming him but also myself for some weird reason still for their divorce, keep in mind he never told me why they divorced to this day, claiming I know why and should move on already)
It caused a strain in my relationship with my Dad that has never recovered.
Fast forward a few years (like 2012/2013) my mom actually apologized and openly said to her friends while I was with her that she should have never taken her own emotions of the divorce out on me.
She admired the fact that despite everything she had put me through I came back to her.
Her friends face were surprised because they thought I was acting out because of my own emotions of the divorce.
And yet to this day Im a broken man having to deal with depression/autism/RP/trauma.
I dont remember much from my teenage years other than feeling alone, being bullied and discriminated, having a lot fights at home and being on a social island.
I do not want to wonder or think what might have been or what could have been. I try to live in the present but often catch myself reminiscing about the past.
I still have a friendship group from kindergarten and basic school and for me thats enough.
What I still struggle with is the damage and pain from my teenage years.
Which have left scars and open wounds which feel like theyll never heal or fade.
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Im 31 now but I was 12 when my parents got divorced.
To make a long story short: I for longest time blamed myself for it.
(While I later heard from my mom he was cheatig)
Thinking I wasnt good enough because she also lashed out all her anger/sadness and pain on me.
I was 16 when my mom told me what really happened. (I started blaming him but also myself for some weird reason still for their divorce, keep in mind he never told me why they divorced to this day, claiming I know why and should move on already)
It caused a strain in my relationship with my Dad that has never recovered.
Fast forward a few years (like 2012/2013) my mom actually apologized and openly said to her friends while I was with her that she should have never taken her own emotions of the divorce out on me.
She admired the fact that despite everything she had put me through I came back to her.
Her friends face were surprised because they thought I was acting out because of my own emotions of the divorce.
And yet to this day Im a broken man having to deal with depression/autism/RP/trauma.
I dont remember much from my teenage years other than feeling alone, being bullied and discriminated, having a lot fights at home and being on a social island.
I do not want to wonder or think what might have been or what could have been. I try to live in the present but often catch myself reminiscing about the past.
I still have a friendship group from kindergarten and basic school and for me thats enough.
What I still struggle with is the damage and pain from my teenage years.
Which have left scars and open wounds which feel like theyll never heal or fade.
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Zephorian
I was beaten as a child for 6 years, almost 5 days a week, when I was 6 until around the age of 11. He was a religious figure who was supposed to be teaching me about my religion. However he was really violent and horrible and would continuously beat me during weekdays after school.
Then when that finished, I started high school, and was bullied relentlessly for my looks (racial, weight, mannerisms (feminine tendencies. The other kids would pull my hair, hit me, burn me with bunsen burners during science class, kick me, spit on me and just make my life a misery. I was suicidal by the age of 12, constantly crying and writing suicide notes, but was always too afraid to go through with it.
Needless to say, those childhood experiences have completely damaged me as a person. I've suffered for years since, with crippling anxiety and depression and suicidal thoughts.
Now that I'm reaching my 40's, My life is such a mess. I have no career. Have made some awful decisions and awful mistakes, and I'm just generally a complete loser with nothing going for me.
The anxiety and depression have got worse with age. I'm practically scared and fearful of everything and everyone. I was agoraphobic for a number of years and lost out on so much.
I also have a body deformity too which hasn't helped with my confidence, and loose skin due to losing weight as I became very obese during my youth.
I've been to therapists, tried medication. But nothing ever seems to help me.
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I was beaten as a child for 6 years, almost 5 days a week, when I was 6 until around the age of 11. He was a religious figure who was supposed to be teaching me about my religion. However he was really violent and horrible and would continuously beat me during weekdays after school.
Then when that finished, I started high school, and was bullied relentlessly for my looks (racial, weight, mannerisms (feminine tendencies. The other kids would pull my hair, hit me, burn me with bunsen burners during science class, kick me, spit on me and just make my life a misery. I was suicidal by the age of 12, constantly crying and writing suicide notes, but was always too afraid to go through with it.
Needless to say, those childhood experiences have completely damaged me as a person. I've suffered for years since, with crippling anxiety and depression and suicidal thoughts.
Now that I'm reaching my 40's, My life is such a mess. I have no career. Have made some awful decisions and awful mistakes, and I'm just generally a complete loser with nothing going for me.
The anxiety and depression have got worse with age. I'm practically scared and fearful of everything and everyone. I was agoraphobic for a number of years and lost out on so much.
I also have a body deformity too which hasn't helped with my confidence, and loose skin due to losing weight as I became very obese during my youth.
I've been to therapists, tried medication. But nothing ever seems to help me.
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JimmyRPG
I find myself wandering towards these kinds of videos more and more. I have good parents, and I've always considered myself lucky to have a generally light childhood. I've never been abused, but my childhood from elementary school to middle school was very friendless and lonely. I eventually got friends but I keep finding myself holding them at arms distance because that's how I've been subconsciously protecting myself. If I don't let them too close it won't hurt as much when they leave, even though my past friends never actually left me- i usually left them, typically because I had to switch schools. I keep finding myself wondering if I'm actually okay or if there's actually an issue.
To everyone who's also had a friendless childhood, just give it time. There's definitely people in your future, you might have to seek them. A good place to start is doing activities outside of school: )
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I find myself wandering towards these kinds of videos more and more. I have good parents, and I've always considered myself lucky to have a generally light childhood. I've never been abused, but my childhood from elementary school to middle school was very friendless and lonely. I eventually got friends but I keep finding myself holding them at arms distance because that's how I've been subconsciously protecting myself. If I don't let them too close it won't hurt as much when they leave, even though my past friends never actually left me- i usually left them, typically because I had to switch schools. I keep finding myself wondering if I'm actually okay or if there's actually an issue.
To everyone who's also had a friendless childhood, just give it time. There's definitely people in your future, you might have to seek them. A good place to start is doing activities outside of school: )
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Bonzo
I need to vent somewhere, maybe someone can relate. Grew up in a house without love of both parents, they were fighting non stop and my dad was mostly drunk, therefore I was afraid of him even tho he did not mean harm to me but being abusive to my mom did not help his image in my head for sure. Every weekend was the same pretty much, dad gets drunk, they get into a fight, screaming shouting he probably hit her two times even. Being an only child did not help either. I feel really lonely lately after getting of my meds and I just have this feeling of sadness whenever I come home to my dad since they do not live together anymore. I'm jealous of my friends being able to come to their homes and spend some nice time with their parents while I do not have that luxury. I'm feeling very lost lately; I have no idea what to do or how to fight that state. Thank you for reading.
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I need to vent somewhere, maybe someone can relate. Grew up in a house without love of both parents, they were fighting non stop and my dad was mostly drunk, therefore I was afraid of him even tho he did not mean harm to me but being abusive to my mom did not help his image in my head for sure. Every weekend was the same pretty much, dad gets drunk, they get into a fight, screaming shouting he probably hit her two times even. Being an only child did not help either. I feel really lonely lately after getting of my meds and I just have this feeling of sadness whenever I come home to my dad since they do not live together anymore. I'm jealous of my friends being able to come to their homes and spend some nice time with their parents while I do not have that luxury. I'm feeling very lost lately; I have no idea what to do or how to fight that state. Thank you for reading.
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Sonja
I grew up in a household where both parents were in love with other people they could not get or be with, as a result never trusted, no love between them, arguing, fighting always. It affected me much worse than my siblings, I am 52 years old, was married to my husband for 20 years, now divorced 10 years, after the divorce I was with another man for 7 years and moved out of his apartment in 2018 into my own. My son and I are living in this apartment together. The past 3 years I have been meeting and dating several guys. To date I drink obsessively, cannot trust, always look for arguments, never seem to be able to maintain a good relationship even though I have been with very good men, always accusing them of having affairs, it's all in my head. Please advise on what to do?
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I grew up in a household where both parents were in love with other people they could not get or be with, as a result never trusted, no love between them, arguing, fighting always. It affected me much worse than my siblings, I am 52 years old, was married to my husband for 20 years, now divorced 10 years, after the divorce I was with another man for 7 years and moved out of his apartment in 2018 into my own. My son and I are living in this apartment together. The past 3 years I have been meeting and dating several guys. To date I drink obsessively, cannot trust, always look for arguments, never seem to be able to maintain a good relationship even though I have been with very good men, always accusing them of having affairs, it's all in my head. Please advise on what to do?
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Jana
I barely remember anything from the past. Whenever my friends are talking about school memories and I don't remember them they bully me for not having a proper memory. I zone out when someone starts talking about a past event or try and change the subject. I've also been dealing with depression ever since I can remember. I tried moving out of the house, studying abroad, but nothing works out. I've been on antidepressants for almost 3 years but I still want to die. My dad once said that I won't ever be happy, and now I'm starting to believe it.
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I barely remember anything from the past. Whenever my friends are talking about school memories and I don't remember them they bully me for not having a proper memory. I zone out when someone starts talking about a past event or try and change the subject. I've also been dealing with depression ever since I can remember. I tried moving out of the house, studying abroad, but nothing works out. I've been on antidepressants for almost 3 years but I still want to die. My dad once said that I won't ever be happy, and now I'm starting to believe it.
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Sunnyxxrays
people always said that their parents would argue (which would also happen while I was around) but they would also argue with me (in which both of my parents would gang up on me basically in arguement leaving me in tears. (although I never cried in front of them because that would only make them angrier.
still in this environment a few years later and it has not gotten any better, worse almost. my only response I could do to this was to be downright cold to them and not express any of my emotions around them. thanks, mom and dad.
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people always said that their parents would argue (which would also happen while I was around) but they would also argue with me (in which both of my parents would gang up on me basically in arguement leaving me in tears. (although I never cried in front of them because that would only make them angrier.
still in this environment a few years later and it has not gotten any better, worse almost. my only response I could do to this was to be downright cold to them and not express any of my emotions around them. thanks, mom and dad.
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Black
I am 18 and just moved to the usa alone to study it was the best decision of my life to go as far as i can from my mother who always abused me physically and emotionally but i am still not over it and i cry everyday remembering how she treated me so badly, i will be beaten from a really young age just because she had mental problems and needed to go see a thearapist i cant even remeber a single time when she actually treated me like her daughter instead of a punching bag to relieve her anger
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I am 18 and just moved to the usa alone to study it was the best decision of my life to go as far as i can from my mother who always abused me physically and emotionally but i am still not over it and i cry everyday remembering how she treated me so badly, i will be beaten from a really young age just because she had mental problems and needed to go see a thearapist i cant even remeber a single time when she actually treated me like her daughter instead of a punching bag to relieve her anger
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Renato
For God sake I have all that. I started having counseling sessions and a self-compassion training/exercise was recommended to me which helped me for a while but now I see I'm stuck again. I can't work at all and very scared almost paralyzed fearing to loose my job but at the same time I can't work. Not mentioned how it's been affecting all the other sectors of my life too. Does anybody have a treatment for that or want to share something that would be helpful to me?
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For God sake I have all that. I started having counseling sessions and a self-compassion training/exercise was recommended to me which helped me for a while but now I see I'm stuck again. I can't work at all and very scared almost paralyzed fearing to loose my job but at the same time I can't work. Not mentioned how it's been affecting all the other sectors of my life too. Does anybody have a treatment for that or want to share something that would be helpful to me?
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HentaiSweetie
Because my parents meant well and loved me I didn't think the insensitive things they said or did to me were traumatizing. Now I realize I match a lot of the symptoms of ACE so I did an assessment test and scored a 3. Could be worse but I wish it were lower. I downplayed the trauma because they did as well. Best part is, the family member who was the main culprit for it now complains about me lacking empathy which is a symptom of emotional neglect.
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Because my parents meant well and loved me I didn't think the insensitive things they said or did to me were traumatizing. Now I realize I match a lot of the symptoms of ACE so I did an assessment test and scored a 3. Could be worse but I wish it were lower. I downplayed the trauma because they did as well. Best part is, the family member who was the main culprit for it now complains about me lacking empathy which is a symptom of emotional neglect.
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? 123.
Parental abuse DEFINITELY follows us. .i remember less of it when im in a good zero contact relationship with my family. .namely, my parents or any of her gross male companions. I dont understand such blatant ignorance and inconsideration for children. .or just simply, others! Its totally disrespectful & shows the many other hidden complications in a families history that are never recognized due to the ignorance!
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Parental abuse DEFINITELY follows us. .i remember less of it when im in a good zero contact relationship with my family. .namely, my parents or any of her gross male companions. I dont understand such blatant ignorance and inconsideration for children. .or just simply, others! Its totally disrespectful & shows the many other hidden complications in a families history that are never recognized due to the ignorance!
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Janay
I'm here because I have a ex boyfriend that I love so much but he has a lot of childhood trauma it took a toll on our relationship he's so use to toxic relationships he says mean things I tell him all the time I don't wanna go down that road with him I've had a toxic life with my mother and I don't want that for my children or myself I wanna break this curse I have really bad anxiety and he just doesn't understand
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I'm here because I have a ex boyfriend that I love so much but he has a lot of childhood trauma it took a toll on our relationship he's so use to toxic relationships he says mean things I tell him all the time I don't wanna go down that road with him I've had a toxic life with my mother and I don't want that for my children or myself I wanna break this curse I have really bad anxiety and he just doesn't understand
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Nicola
Countless replies stating I was abused I hate the fact that this has happened to so many & there is so much suffering going into adulthood & beyond. What are people thinking, to go around abusing children, intending to get away with it, hurts my heart so badly. I feel strongly
how can life continue like this, stop now let's re-educate children to start talking immediately & stop this crime forever
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Countless replies stating I was abused I hate the fact that this has happened to so many & there is so much suffering going into adulthood & beyond. What are people thinking, to go around abusing children, intending to get away with it, hurts my heart so badly. I feel strongly
how can life continue like this, stop now let's re-educate children to start talking immediately & stop this crime forever
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Its-papa-critz
It's not that it's more of when my parents divorced putting it quite simpy I didn't have a normal highschool life so that contributes to it. also as well having that mess with memories doesn't help as well. This has caused me to be very attached I would say towards her and my ma it's like I picture myself still as a kid thinking everything will go back to normal even though it won't.
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It's not that it's more of when my parents divorced putting it quite simpy I didn't have a normal highschool life so that contributes to it. also as well having that mess with memories doesn't help as well. This has caused me to be very attached I would say towards her and my ma it's like I picture myself still as a kid thinking everything will go back to normal even though it won't.
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Khan
majority of the population goes through some sort of trauma and it becomes a part of them and ruins their lives because they carry it on in their future.
If you went through it please let it go today so it doesnt ruin you anymore.
Say it with me Trauma and bad experiences you are not a part of me and I am consciously throwing you off my back this very second, goodbye
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majority of the population goes through some sort of trauma and it becomes a part of them and ruins their lives because they carry it on in their future.
If you went through it please let it go today so it doesnt ruin you anymore.
Say it with me Trauma and bad experiences you are not a part of me and I am consciously throwing you off my back this very second, goodbye
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Bridget
My whole life has been trauma, from a toddler. All these pertain to me and more! No one around me understands, even my mom. I am told to let it go and get over it. I'm sorry but being hurt and violated by a step parent from the age of 4 to 12 did some damage to me. I'm working on it but it's a long process. It definitely ruined me.
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My whole life has been trauma, from a toddler. All these pertain to me and more! No one around me understands, even my mom. I am told to let it go and get over it. I'm sorry but being hurt and violated by a step parent from the age of 4 to 12 did some damage to me. I'm working on it but it's a long process. It definitely ruined me.
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toneman335
I lived with dysfunctional parents, a rageaholic mother and a alcoholic father, that caused psychological trauma. In that damaged state my mother sent me to a Catholic grade school with mental and physically abusive nuns that completed the childhood abuse on me. The effects of which I experience well into adulthood.
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I lived with dysfunctional parents, a rageaholic mother and a alcoholic father, that caused psychological trauma. In that damaged state my mother sent me to a Catholic grade school with mental and physically abusive nuns that completed the childhood abuse on me. The effects of which I experience well into adulthood.
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todoroki
This is a bit of a vent but I'm just saying what I felt like in their household. One of my parents was never nice to me or my other parent. They would often get drunk before the psychological abuse. I used to always get scared everything they got into a fight. He would often also use physical violence
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This is a bit of a vent but I'm just saying what I felt like in their household. One of my parents was never nice to me or my other parent. They would often get drunk before the psychological abuse. I used to always get scared everything they got into a fight. He would often also use physical violence
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Sachin
U just told my story I am 24 and it feels hard to be alive but live only for my mother because she is the one I always matter to, I made decision before to hang on roof fan then I just remember her and postponed. when she wont be here anymore than there nothing to be achieved or to lost for me
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U just told my story I am 24 and it feels hard to be alive but live only for my mother because she is the one I always matter to, I made decision before to hang on roof fan then I just remember her and postponed. when she wont be here anymore than there nothing to be achieved or to lost for me
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Drina
My childhood and adolescence was filled with resentment. I had problems asserting myself at school. I developed unhealthy coping mechanisms and self-harmed. I accepted request after request from my classmates, no matter how ridiculous they were, to the point where I started resenting them.
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My childhood and adolescence was filled with resentment. I had problems asserting myself at school. I developed unhealthy coping mechanisms and self-harmed. I accepted request after request from my classmates, no matter how ridiculous they were, to the point where I started resenting them.
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bic
My earliest memories are of my parents fighting. Verbal and physical. Since then nothing has went my way. Being bullied throughout my childhood. No teacher, no adult, no peer, nobody liked me. Everybody bullied me. My dreams are keeping me alive. I hope one day I can escape this prison.
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My earliest memories are of my parents fighting. Verbal and physical. Since then nothing has went my way. Being bullied throughout my childhood. No teacher, no adult, no peer, nobody liked me. Everybody bullied me. My dreams are keeping me alive. I hope one day I can escape this prison.
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ken
whenever I get so called beat by my parents I try to lock myself ina room of hide in a corner, i have more fear than love for them. its like everytime i get into trouble it becomes normal and im so used to i its not abuse, its never been abuse until i've met people who say it is
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whenever I get so called beat by my parents I try to lock myself ina room of hide in a corner, i have more fear than love for them. its like everytime i get into trouble it becomes normal and im so used to i its not abuse, its never been abuse until i've met people who say it is
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fabian
I share almost all these traits, I am at a point in life where I am tired of just being, everything externally is beyond great, but internally Im so broken. I cant kill myself but man do wish something else killed me.
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I share almost all these traits, I am at a point in life where I am tired of just being, everything externally is beyond great, but internally Im so broken. I cant kill myself but man do wish something else killed me.
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Sofias
I came here because of my childhood emotional and physical abuse. I just feel so angry all the time toward everyone in my life and the world. At the same time I feel so alone, misunderstood, and worthless.
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I came here because of my childhood emotional and physical abuse. I just feel so angry all the time toward everyone in my life and the world. At the same time I feel so alone, misunderstood, and worthless.
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