Avoidant Personality Disorder. What is it?
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Date: 2023-08-20
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Comments and reviews: 25
Genji
Poof that's me, I'm never there the thing is that I got people talking shit about me doing that even though i got family support on my condition. I feel more relieved avoiding and not wasting that energy and I dont feel the criticism like I used to because I dont care anymore I'm getting old and people are finding out long term who I am, I feel great being in my zone and I'm glad my family respects that. I dont even like socializing online anymore, it does not feel proactive, I rather get things that I want to do done. Feels more rewarding even if I end up reading 3 text books and people find that boring. emergency or not it's good to learn skills if your want to live more independent around others. If your using those skills to help people that is something not many possess it can really reap some benefits
And yes I always think people dont want me around that's why it's good to think positive about what you can do to overpass the depression of not feeling self worth. I'm also on phyciatric treatment for this condition, it has taught me to live with it, accepting rollercoaster choices and then feeling rejection all the time became a nightmare. I rather accept this reality and reject the want to be noticed presence since I'm getting real old now and I do not want to feel like a midlife crises for another 20 years by always comparing me to my ex husband's spouse because apparently I was not good enough fun or not fun, besides that i get more things done this way compared to when i tried to be social which never turns out well and feels like a waste of time, I used to enjoy socializing before meeting my ex because I was just getting out of my shell late, now back in for good and I love it. avoiding feels great, nobody wants me but that's okay. I got my ps5 to make out with along with my single player games lol. Besides if you run into a wall because you feel restricted by this condition there are alternatives, no stress.
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Poof that's me, I'm never there the thing is that I got people talking shit about me doing that even though i got family support on my condition. I feel more relieved avoiding and not wasting that energy and I dont feel the criticism like I used to because I dont care anymore I'm getting old and people are finding out long term who I am, I feel great being in my zone and I'm glad my family respects that. I dont even like socializing online anymore, it does not feel proactive, I rather get things that I want to do done. Feels more rewarding even if I end up reading 3 text books and people find that boring. emergency or not it's good to learn skills if your want to live more independent around others. If your using those skills to help people that is something not many possess it can really reap some benefits
And yes I always think people dont want me around that's why it's good to think positive about what you can do to overpass the depression of not feeling self worth. I'm also on phyciatric treatment for this condition, it has taught me to live with it, accepting rollercoaster choices and then feeling rejection all the time became a nightmare. I rather accept this reality and reject the want to be noticed presence since I'm getting real old now and I do not want to feel like a midlife crises for another 20 years by always comparing me to my ex husband's spouse because apparently I was not good enough fun or not fun, besides that i get more things done this way compared to when i tried to be social which never turns out well and feels like a waste of time, I used to enjoy socializing before meeting my ex because I was just getting out of my shell late, now back in for good and I love it. avoiding feels great, nobody wants me but that's okay. I got my ps5 to make out with along with my single player games lol. Besides if you run into a wall because you feel restricted by this condition there are alternatives, no stress.
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Niyah
I am 15 years old and most of the time when I like around alot of family I see my siblings hanging out chilling or having fun with most of our cousin's. That usually happens if it's like a holiday or party or cookout ok I'll continue so about 100% of the time I feel excluded or left out everything. I do try to talk but people don't really pay attention to what I have to say or not really care at all. Most of the time I feel ignored. so I gave up on that. I also have a fear of rejection because since I have been bullied most of life and treated like nothing sometimes I am anxious that it'll happen again. I do wanna talk to them but I'm nervous because I feel like there not into me or my conversation. I feel like I'll be judged or criticized. So I avoid them. I am trying to get over it but I can't because it's still happening to me till this day. Im not sure if I have APD I'm not certain but this video describes everything about me. Thank you for letting me share this have a nice day
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I am 15 years old and most of the time when I like around alot of family I see my siblings hanging out chilling or having fun with most of our cousin's. That usually happens if it's like a holiday or party or cookout ok I'll continue so about 100% of the time I feel excluded or left out everything. I do try to talk but people don't really pay attention to what I have to say or not really care at all. Most of the time I feel ignored. so I gave up on that. I also have a fear of rejection because since I have been bullied most of life and treated like nothing sometimes I am anxious that it'll happen again. I do wanna talk to them but I'm nervous because I feel like there not into me or my conversation. I feel like I'll be judged or criticized. So I avoid them. I am trying to get over it but I can't because it's still happening to me till this day. Im not sure if I have APD I'm not certain but this video describes everything about me. Thank you for letting me share this have a nice day
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Rhythm
Back then I was extroverted.
But when I got into a new class I got bullied for being so openminded. 3 whole years.
I stopped opening up and got into a deep depression and had to go into psychatry multiple times and got therapy. Since this all happened I dont like meeting up anymore.
The worst thing is that I dont know why I hate it so much. Idk if its bcs of not wanting to get rejected because even with my closest friends I barely want to meet up. My parents basically hate me for being like this.
I hate myself for it too
I want to be social but I always lack motivation and im always feeling bad when im with other people.
Everyone wants me to meet up with others but this hate I have towards meeting up is getting worse every time im being forced to socialize.
Everyone says that If i start meeting up itll get better but it never did.
I just want it to stop
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Back then I was extroverted.
But when I got into a new class I got bullied for being so openminded. 3 whole years.
I stopped opening up and got into a deep depression and had to go into psychatry multiple times and got therapy. Since this all happened I dont like meeting up anymore.
The worst thing is that I dont know why I hate it so much. Idk if its bcs of not wanting to get rejected because even with my closest friends I barely want to meet up. My parents basically hate me for being like this.
I hate myself for it too
I want to be social but I always lack motivation and im always feeling bad when im with other people.
Everyone wants me to meet up with others but this hate I have towards meeting up is getting worse every time im being forced to socialize.
Everyone says that If i start meeting up itll get better but it never did.
I just want it to stop
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vii
I'm in high school and I'm so much insecure tht I never ever talk off mask from my face. I remember I couldn't eat breakfast today at home so my mom packed it. I roamed all school to find a place where no one sees me. My frndz, classmates keep looking down on me cuz of the way I look. I stay out 15 hours a day without eating. I've started to hate myself so much. I can't say no to anyone. I feel like I'm not someone who can think about myself. My studies have become a depression too. I'm going to apply for medical this year. Have so much family pressure. Everyone in the world wants something from me but not me. My frndz keep flattering each other so I feel left out. I can't stay away from them too cuz my seat is fixed. I just wish to get rid of my thoughts. When I look in the mirror I think I'm not so ugly. But some ppl in my life ruined the way I think. I'm ruined
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I'm in high school and I'm so much insecure tht I never ever talk off mask from my face. I remember I couldn't eat breakfast today at home so my mom packed it. I roamed all school to find a place where no one sees me. My frndz, classmates keep looking down on me cuz of the way I look. I stay out 15 hours a day without eating. I've started to hate myself so much. I can't say no to anyone. I feel like I'm not someone who can think about myself. My studies have become a depression too. I'm going to apply for medical this year. Have so much family pressure. Everyone in the world wants something from me but not me. My frndz keep flattering each other so I feel left out. I can't stay away from them too cuz my seat is fixed. I just wish to get rid of my thoughts. When I look in the mirror I think I'm not so ugly. But some ppl in my life ruined the way I think. I'm ruined
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Alcaeus89
What of you withdrawal from others because you genuinely don't find most people interesting? Sometimes I takes such momumental effort to care about what the person is talking about, I would have rather just avoided them altogether. I don't avoid people who I think will reject me, I avoid people who are just too difficult to talk to. I don't have to feel accepted by the guy who does falconry. I will approach him because I am interested in what he does, and I feel like he'll be easy to talk to.
I dont think my apathy is judgemental. It's fine if you want to be into something I don't care about. I shouldn't be obligated to talk about it with you, though. I would much rather be alone than be forced to pretend to be interested in something I don't care about.
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What of you withdrawal from others because you genuinely don't find most people interesting? Sometimes I takes such momumental effort to care about what the person is talking about, I would have rather just avoided them altogether. I don't avoid people who I think will reject me, I avoid people who are just too difficult to talk to. I don't have to feel accepted by the guy who does falconry. I will approach him because I am interested in what he does, and I feel like he'll be easy to talk to.
I dont think my apathy is judgemental. It's fine if you want to be into something I don't care about. I shouldn't be obligated to talk about it with you, though. I would much rather be alone than be forced to pretend to be interested in something I don't care about.
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Angel
I have avoidant personality disorder and to be honest I am selfish, don't care to know people, isolate because I don't care to know others. Selfish with my time and space. People who are not selfish go out of their way to make others happy and they put their own feelings aside for the sake of others. They go see friends and family nor because they want to or it feels good but because they are thinking about the good of others. If I was not so focused on myself I wouldn't have this problem. I am in my 40s and it's sad that it's taken me this long to realize how selfish and self absorbed I have been. It's always about how I feel and my anxiety and me me and me. I feel like a monster for all the cold shoulders, the avoiding, the rudeness all to protect me.
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I have avoidant personality disorder and to be honest I am selfish, don't care to know people, isolate because I don't care to know others. Selfish with my time and space. People who are not selfish go out of their way to make others happy and they put their own feelings aside for the sake of others. They go see friends and family nor because they want to or it feels good but because they are thinking about the good of others. If I was not so focused on myself I wouldn't have this problem. I am in my 40s and it's sad that it's taken me this long to realize how selfish and self absorbed I have been. It's always about how I feel and my anxiety and me me and me. I feel like a monster for all the cold shoulders, the avoiding, the rudeness all to protect me.
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Nola
People with APD cause alot of their own problems, they make life waaay more difficult for themselves then it needs to be, you also hurt the ppl that Love you by going in & out of their life, pulling away, ghosting/ leaving even if it' s unintentional and they are self sabotagers and wreck their own happiness, I find this very sad actually and would recommend therapy. I myself do not have APD but I have dealt with one and it is not easy, I refuse to deal with someone with APD they are more like a project, they are takers, put in minimal work, can' t reciprocate, initiate or communicate, I need someone who can communicate like an adult and give balance in a relationship, after all any relationship is suppose to wk both ways.
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People with APD cause alot of their own problems, they make life waaay more difficult for themselves then it needs to be, you also hurt the ppl that Love you by going in & out of their life, pulling away, ghosting/ leaving even if it' s unintentional and they are self sabotagers and wreck their own happiness, I find this very sad actually and would recommend therapy. I myself do not have APD but I have dealt with one and it is not easy, I refuse to deal with someone with APD they are more like a project, they are takers, put in minimal work, can' t reciprocate, initiate or communicate, I need someone who can communicate like an adult and give balance in a relationship, after all any relationship is suppose to wk both ways.
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Allan
Nah I haven't felt this much good being all alone with my own self. I've attempted countless efforts to have and to be a friend only to get used for one's own interests or to get pushed away from patience and affection. I thought the problem was me. I became so irresponsible over my primary needs and health, from having negative perceptions to dangerous tendencies. But now I'm over it.
I'm done.
I never believed in both friendship and love so why do I chase it so much? If it exists, then may they come to me, but I'm not doing it anymore.
I usually never express myself on my life or problems, both in real life and on the internet, but I had to.
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Nah I haven't felt this much good being all alone with my own self. I've attempted countless efforts to have and to be a friend only to get used for one's own interests or to get pushed away from patience and affection. I thought the problem was me. I became so irresponsible over my primary needs and health, from having negative perceptions to dangerous tendencies. But now I'm over it.
I'm done.
I never believed in both friendship and love so why do I chase it so much? If it exists, then may they come to me, but I'm not doing it anymore.
I usually never express myself on my life or problems, both in real life and on the internet, but I had to.
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sneedler
I have this and adhd, so in social interactions I come across as super hyper when I can talk. But extremely reserved at the same time. I'm like a walking contradiction. And what's worse is when I start really opening up to people and they just look or treat you like you're retarded or something, when you really just wanna fit in soo badly. All I ever wanted was to feel normal. I spent this new years alone because I'm soo self conscious about what my mates think of me, and I know they joke around. But alot of the time I feel like the punchline. It's not their fault I'm insecure as hell. I just wish to god I wasnt such a mess in social interactions
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I have this and adhd, so in social interactions I come across as super hyper when I can talk. But extremely reserved at the same time. I'm like a walking contradiction. And what's worse is when I start really opening up to people and they just look or treat you like you're retarded or something, when you really just wanna fit in soo badly. All I ever wanted was to feel normal. I spent this new years alone because I'm soo self conscious about what my mates think of me, and I know they joke around. But alot of the time I feel like the punchline. It's not their fault I'm insecure as hell. I just wish to god I wasnt such a mess in social interactions
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WalnutToad
I gym, I have great grades, I am very humble and I do not like social interactions: I would much rather read a book at home than in a book club. I don't have any friends to hang out with after school and wouldn't want to if I could. My father worries for me because of this, I am not sure how he understands or feels about how I spend my free time but that is how I enjoy it. I am not sure why he is adamant that it is normal for someone to enjoy spending most of their time socially and if they don't then there must be a cause for it depression, anxiety etc. I am not sure why I posted this.
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I gym, I have great grades, I am very humble and I do not like social interactions: I would much rather read a book at home than in a book club. I don't have any friends to hang out with after school and wouldn't want to if I could. My father worries for me because of this, I am not sure how he understands or feels about how I spend my free time but that is how I enjoy it. I am not sure why he is adamant that it is normal for someone to enjoy spending most of their time socially and if they don't then there must be a cause for it depression, anxiety etc. I am not sure why I posted this.
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Molly
When I tell my family I dont want to go to a function, they take it personally, and I know this. Its not personal. So there are layers of guilt and shame. Why cant people just tell me that they are gathering and Im invited. If I dont go its not a big deal. Not at all. Its we are meeting here see you then. None of my family even know I have this disorder. It would cause their selves to get worked up. Its easier in the closet, yet that causes so much anxiety. For myself, I can spot an avoidant and do my best to ease interactions. Is this hyper self awareness or sensitivity issues?
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When I tell my family I dont want to go to a function, they take it personally, and I know this. Its not personal. So there are layers of guilt and shame. Why cant people just tell me that they are gathering and Im invited. If I dont go its not a big deal. Not at all. Its we are meeting here see you then. None of my family even know I have this disorder. It would cause their selves to get worked up. Its easier in the closet, yet that causes so much anxiety. For myself, I can spot an avoidant and do my best to ease interactions. Is this hyper self awareness or sensitivity issues?
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Mr.
Well shit this is probably me. I am being called in for my internship tomorrow and I feel like my life is coming to an end already! :(
For as long as I can remember, I always have fantasized about having a life of well-off solitude. A weird fantasy mixture of having zero financial problems after winning the lottery, having a replica planet Earth as my own solitary home paradise somewhere else in the universe; farming for self-sustenance and tending to my health by day, and continue living a virtual life in the internet, especially gaming, among other hobbies by night.
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Well shit this is probably me. I am being called in for my internship tomorrow and I feel like my life is coming to an end already! :(
For as long as I can remember, I always have fantasized about having a life of well-off solitude. A weird fantasy mixture of having zero financial problems after winning the lottery, having a replica planet Earth as my own solitary home paradise somewhere else in the universe; farming for self-sustenance and tending to my health by day, and continue living a virtual life in the internet, especially gaming, among other hobbies by night.
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Rob
When invited to Social settings, I would make up an excuse just not to be present. However, when I can't avoid social settings, I pretend to be happy, and make people laugh because I'm quite good with humor, but deep down inside, I'm not happy being there. Once upon a time being called ugly and being made fun of, use to make me cry, but now I cry no more because crying is useless, and it doesn't change anything. Apparently, I have become emotionally strong.
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When invited to Social settings, I would make up an excuse just not to be present. However, when I can't avoid social settings, I pretend to be happy, and make people laugh because I'm quite good with humor, but deep down inside, I'm not happy being there. Once upon a time being called ugly and being made fun of, use to make me cry, but now I cry no more because crying is useless, and it doesn't change anything. Apparently, I have become emotionally strong.
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Byron
Leaving a religious group addressing abuse is one thing - members avoidance of criticism aldo comes with thier aggressions to exile and work as a volunteer on federal lands. only having someone propagating a myth - certainly something to avoid. You can't host a recreation area cast as entity of a dictatorship where your family's military and police ties are exaggerated by a person or persons. I picture being like wood - sanded on both sides.
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Leaving a religious group addressing abuse is one thing - members avoidance of criticism aldo comes with thier aggressions to exile and work as a volunteer on federal lands. only having someone propagating a myth - certainly something to avoid. You can't host a recreation area cast as entity of a dictatorship where your family's military and police ties are exaggerated by a person or persons. I picture being like wood - sanded on both sides.
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mar
i relate to all of the symptoms here but i dont really want to tell my mom about it bc im scared if she will say im being overdramatic (which is probably true) and i wonder what caused all of it, i havent been abused by anyone and i dont have that big of trauma, is it because of my personality? is it because of my surroundings? idk but i really want to ask my mom who knows some stuff about psychology about this
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i relate to all of the symptoms here but i dont really want to tell my mom about it bc im scared if she will say im being overdramatic (which is probably true) and i wonder what caused all of it, i havent been abused by anyone and i dont have that big of trauma, is it because of my personality? is it because of my surroundings? idk but i really want to ask my mom who knows some stuff about psychology about this
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Liona
for awhile i thought i might have social anxiety but then it got to a point when i realized it was worse, or more than that, and thats when i discovered selective mutism and APD and now i am stuck unsure if i have selective mutism or avoidant personality. growing up with this, it ruins you and your life. you wish it would go away but it never does, it's like you are you worst enemy and you don't know why.
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for awhile i thought i might have social anxiety but then it got to a point when i realized it was worse, or more than that, and thats when i discovered selective mutism and APD and now i am stuck unsure if i have selective mutism or avoidant personality. growing up with this, it ruins you and your life. you wish it would go away but it never does, it's like you are you worst enemy and you don't know why.
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Mariam
This video described me perfectly. Making friends has always been really hard for me since kindergarten. My problem is that I think that I'm not interesting enough and criticism makes me really nervous so I always end up messing up every conversation that I have with someone. I really want to have friends and be more social but every time try I end up regretting it. I'm really tired of living this way.
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This video described me perfectly. Making friends has always been really hard for me since kindergarten. My problem is that I think that I'm not interesting enough and criticism makes me really nervous so I always end up messing up every conversation that I have with someone. I really want to have friends and be more social but every time try I end up regretting it. I'm really tired of living this way.
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BagelBird54
For me, the biggest realization about APD and social anxiety (which I was wrongly told to have so many times) was, that APD just convinces you, that you're the ultimate annoyance and burden without the stress over it. It's really the differenc between Will I be annoying if I joined in this group's conversation? in contrast to I'm despisable, and I will do them a favor if I'm not joining in.
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For me, the biggest realization about APD and social anxiety (which I was wrongly told to have so many times) was, that APD just convinces you, that you're the ultimate annoyance and burden without the stress over it. It's really the differenc between Will I be annoying if I joined in this group's conversation? in contrast to I'm despisable, and I will do them a favor if I'm not joining in.
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ramonster163
I got diagnosed with APD after speaking to my phycologist for a few sessions. I'm almost 40, but it feels good to finally have a name for the thing I've been struggling with for so long. APD requires long term treatment, but he's confident that we can make progress.
Please don't wait as long as I did to find help. Go talk to your GP, go talk to a professional.
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I got diagnosed with APD after speaking to my phycologist for a few sessions. I'm almost 40, but it feels good to finally have a name for the thing I've been struggling with for so long. APD requires long term treatment, but he's confident that we can make progress.
Please don't wait as long as I did to find help. Go talk to your GP, go talk to a professional.
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xylitolnation
Yeah Im definitely experiencing this rn. I have been withdrawing from relationships for years, and it has got to a point that I dont even have enough self motivation to see a therapist. The worst part is I blame myself and have dramatic panic attack every time I think about the people that I might have harmed from withdrawing our relationships.
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Yeah Im definitely experiencing this rn. I have been withdrawing from relationships for years, and it has got to a point that I dont even have enough self motivation to see a therapist. The worst part is I blame myself and have dramatic panic attack every time I think about the people that I might have harmed from withdrawing our relationships.
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Bradlee
Why does everyone act like u are depressed if u enjoy self isolationwe are products of our experiences n environment. I dont enjoy my past interactions so why would I continue interactingIm happy. I enjoy my life. I have a farm with plenty animals. My family lives closeI just dont like people. Sue me
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Why does everyone act like u are depressed if u enjoy self isolationwe are products of our experiences n environment. I dont enjoy my past interactions so why would I continue interactingIm happy. I enjoy my life. I have a farm with plenty animals. My family lives closeI just dont like people. Sue me
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Hydrogen
I'd say I hit my rock bottom last summer. I spent almost 4 months only being at home. Playing games. But since then I've seek help and I started trying to be open to meeting new people or going more in public. I didn't fully get rid of my fear, but It's definitely better than It used to be.
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I'd say I hit my rock bottom last summer. I spent almost 4 months only being at home. Playing games. But since then I've seek help and I started trying to be open to meeting new people or going more in public. I didn't fully get rid of my fear, but It's definitely better than It used to be.
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ezra
Don't you ppl enjoy being alone, and feel anxious wasting your time on things you are not interested doing and feel used and abused when you have to accompany freinds on useless stuff, isn't Boring to just sitt there and talk nonsense when you can be home to read a book or learn something new
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Don't you ppl enjoy being alone, and feel anxious wasting your time on things you are not interested doing and feel used and abused when you have to accompany freinds on useless stuff, isn't Boring to just sitt there and talk nonsense when you can be home to read a book or learn something new
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EVi. e.
Been diagnosed w/ APD and I do not feel inadequate. I just hate social interactions after years of abuse, but am naturally an empath. This means I don't like interacting with people, but I'm not antisocial (APD and antisocial are used interchangeably too often.
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Been diagnosed w/ APD and I do not feel inadequate. I just hate social interactions after years of abuse, but am naturally an empath. This means I don't like interacting with people, but I'm not antisocial (APD and antisocial are used interchangeably too often.
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Kiss
I don't like people talking and asking about me. I don't know if its wrong or not but I just don't like other people to know about me or what am I doing. Because I know they'll be only talking about me and I just want to have a peaceful life.
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I don't like people talking and asking about me. I don't know if its wrong or not but I just don't like other people to know about me or what am I doing. Because I know they'll be only talking about me and I just want to have a peaceful life.
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