5 Red Flags You Need to Watch Out For When Dating
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Date: 2023-08-20
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Comments and reviews: 25
stealth3402
my girlfriend of three years is incredibly passive aggressive, and shell be passive aggressive on mistakes that I make. most recently it was because she asked me to come over because she wasnt feeling well. we had already said our goodnights roughly 3 hours before, so I was under the impression she was already asleep. I was in the middle of a game and said I would be over as soon as possible, I had knots in my stomach just from saying it out loud and knew it wasnt right. it took 8 min for me to be done and I went straight over to her house and she seemed better, but we just lied in her bed for 2 and a half hours. After that she fell asleep and I left. fast forward to the next day, she made a comment along the lines of this game is more important than what you are doing. it made me feel like shit, but I knew the mistake I had made and didnt say anything. the next day, I was moving some pictures off her old hard drive that she wanted of her previous dog, and I asked her if she wanted to come pick which photos she wanted. she was on her phone and ignored me, so I just went on my phone and started playing a game. I asked again 20 min later, to which I was told, give me 10-15 min, im in a game. It made my stomach knot up and I said something this time. I knew it was the wrong decision to finish out my game instead of stopping what I was doing and going over there, but that doesnt give her the right to make me feel like shit for two days for a mistake that took 8 minutes. I apologized and voiced how it was childish to be passive aggressive about it and she finally got up and moved her pictures over. im not sure what I have to do
sorry for the wall of text
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my girlfriend of three years is incredibly passive aggressive, and shell be passive aggressive on mistakes that I make. most recently it was because she asked me to come over because she wasnt feeling well. we had already said our goodnights roughly 3 hours before, so I was under the impression she was already asleep. I was in the middle of a game and said I would be over as soon as possible, I had knots in my stomach just from saying it out loud and knew it wasnt right. it took 8 min for me to be done and I went straight over to her house and she seemed better, but we just lied in her bed for 2 and a half hours. After that she fell asleep and I left. fast forward to the next day, she made a comment along the lines of this game is more important than what you are doing. it made me feel like shit, but I knew the mistake I had made and didnt say anything. the next day, I was moving some pictures off her old hard drive that she wanted of her previous dog, and I asked her if she wanted to come pick which photos she wanted. she was on her phone and ignored me, so I just went on my phone and started playing a game. I asked again 20 min later, to which I was told, give me 10-15 min, im in a game. It made my stomach knot up and I said something this time. I knew it was the wrong decision to finish out my game instead of stopping what I was doing and going over there, but that doesnt give her the right to make me feel like shit for two days for a mistake that took 8 minutes. I apologized and voiced how it was childish to be passive aggressive about it and she finally got up and moved her pictures over. im not sure what I have to do
sorry for the wall of text
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Indrid
If someone asks, What do you do for a living, in a date, tell the person you scoop out animal cages at the local animal stockyards. Then do not ask for another date. The person asking what you do for a living is someone looking for money to take. Go to the date driving a very old car and wearing ordinary clothes. If you do not have an old car, buy one, borrow one, or rent one. You do not want to show up to a date driving a newer sports car or luxury sedan. I guess this also depends on which nation you reside. In some money obsessed nations, perhaps it may be just fine to ask someone what they do for a living. But to be regarded or another date fairly, always answer what you do for a living with a very weak job, or maybe say you are between jobs. I carry this a bit far. I make quite a handsome amount of capital, more than most college graduates. But I drive a very old vehicle and dress very bland. I need no money parasites to take interest in me.
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If someone asks, What do you do for a living, in a date, tell the person you scoop out animal cages at the local animal stockyards. Then do not ask for another date. The person asking what you do for a living is someone looking for money to take. Go to the date driving a very old car and wearing ordinary clothes. If you do not have an old car, buy one, borrow one, or rent one. You do not want to show up to a date driving a newer sports car or luxury sedan. I guess this also depends on which nation you reside. In some money obsessed nations, perhaps it may be just fine to ask someone what they do for a living. But to be regarded or another date fairly, always answer what you do for a living with a very weak job, or maybe say you are between jobs. I carry this a bit far. I make quite a handsome amount of capital, more than most college graduates. But I drive a very old vehicle and dress very bland. I need no money parasites to take interest in me.
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Sarena
My boyfriend definitely gave off a red flag with the way he treated fast food/retail workers when we first were together. He definitely gave off a sense of entitlement, and I think that comes from him being a white male, but also taking advantage of his disability (hes in a wheelchair. I called him out on it, and he didnt realize he was being rude/entitled. I can gladly say hes not like that anymore, but anytime I even sense he might do something like that, I remind him before it even happens. But I dont really have to do that. I think its good that he changed, and listened to me. Yet I also know that most of the time, that wont be the case. I do agree that if you feel uncomfortable in any way with someone, listen to your gut feeling.
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My boyfriend definitely gave off a red flag with the way he treated fast food/retail workers when we first were together. He definitely gave off a sense of entitlement, and I think that comes from him being a white male, but also taking advantage of his disability (hes in a wheelchair. I called him out on it, and he didnt realize he was being rude/entitled. I can gladly say hes not like that anymore, but anytime I even sense he might do something like that, I remind him before it even happens. But I dont really have to do that. I think its good that he changed, and listened to me. Yet I also know that most of the time, that wont be the case. I do agree that if you feel uncomfortable in any way with someone, listen to your gut feeling.
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Erwin
Biggest red flag is the constant expectation and entitlement to be entertained and served. You are always the person making things happen, making suggestions, putting in the effort and footing the bill. And the other person just sort of expects to have a good time. Which they then repay or don't.
This kind of exchange of gifts and closeness is terribly harmful and poisonous. It is not a relationship. It is a transaction and it is a terrible base to build a relationship on. Not only is there a big power difference but also a huge chance one of the two being taken advantage of.
So if someone comes bearing gifts that go way above normal or expects to be entertained and served then those are red flags.
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Biggest red flag is the constant expectation and entitlement to be entertained and served. You are always the person making things happen, making suggestions, putting in the effort and footing the bill. And the other person just sort of expects to have a good time. Which they then repay or don't.
This kind of exchange of gifts and closeness is terribly harmful and poisonous. It is not a relationship. It is a transaction and it is a terrible base to build a relationship on. Not only is there a big power difference but also a huge chance one of the two being taken advantage of.
So if someone comes bearing gifts that go way above normal or expects to be entertained and served then those are red flags.
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esmoonieya
Immature and telling little lies is definitely me. My partner is the one who does not want to communicate but always pointing out my shortcomings. Both is a little bit arrogant in some way but we dont calling our exes crazy. I want to learn to take critics but if all Im hearing is hurtful critics, i dont know what to do. I feel like these red flags are not permanent but if both people are in the reds, its either both will learn or both will never learn.
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Immature and telling little lies is definitely me. My partner is the one who does not want to communicate but always pointing out my shortcomings. Both is a little bit arrogant in some way but we dont calling our exes crazy. I want to learn to take critics but if all Im hearing is hurtful critics, i dont know what to do. I feel like these red flags are not permanent but if both people are in the reds, its either both will learn or both will never learn.
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hallo
well a friend got a little thiccer and i pointed out the growth spurt and told her about the risks i think im walking a fine line between red flag and helpfull but she made a quip to get back at me and lost a decent amount of weight quickly witch alarmed me as well, i just want to help since she helps me a lot as wel, i know its a sensetive subject but i think i can't say nothing, i hope i didnt come off as an asshole or redflag
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well a friend got a little thiccer and i pointed out the growth spurt and told her about the risks i think im walking a fine line between red flag and helpfull but she made a quip to get back at me and lost a decent amount of weight quickly witch alarmed me as well, i just want to help since she helps me a lot as wel, i know its a sensetive subject but i think i can't say nothing, i hope i didnt come off as an asshole or redflag
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education
Many of these are things older people in my extended family do all the time. So when I started dating it wasnt a red flag to me when it shouldve been. Now I can identify the behavior in them & watch how it wrecks many of their relationships including their relationships with me. I have to keep them at a distance yet cant explain why to them in a way that they would accept.
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Many of these are things older people in my extended family do all the time. So when I started dating it wasnt a red flag to me when it shouldve been. Now I can identify the behavior in them & watch how it wrecks many of their relationships including their relationships with me. I have to keep them at a distance yet cant explain why to them in a way that they would accept.
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Kris
i broke with an ex becaue she never really i felt like never really cared about how i felt when i expressed them, but she chose to stay friends and i dont how but she said she would wait for me and why is she waiting for me? i think i have to get better myself and then help her outbut is hat ok? i get better myself then go back for her? am i being tooo close minded?
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i broke with an ex becaue she never really i felt like never really cared about how i felt when i expressed them, but she chose to stay friends and i dont how but she said she would wait for me and why is she waiting for me? i think i have to get better myself and then help her outbut is hat ok? i get better myself then go back for her? am i being tooo close minded?
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Super
Damn it. I already failed at number one. my diagnosed narcissist ex criticised me on one of our first dates for my insecurity and me naively still went into a relationship with that human trash. of course all the other signs followed along. well, I learned a lot about humans through this so yeah, I got that going on for me.
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Damn it. I already failed at number one. my diagnosed narcissist ex criticised me on one of our first dates for my insecurity and me naively still went into a relationship with that human trash. of course all the other signs followed along. well, I learned a lot about humans through this so yeah, I got that going on for me.
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Jesse
So everyone is a phycologist now lol.
just because of date didn't turn out the way you wanted doesn't mean what they were doing was a red flag.
If anything blaming is a big red flag.
Not being able to communicate your intent is a big flag. So maybe consider that you had the red flag not them, jeez
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So everyone is a phycologist now lol.
just because of date didn't turn out the way you wanted doesn't mean what they were doing was a red flag.
If anything blaming is a big red flag.
Not being able to communicate your intent is a big flag. So maybe consider that you had the red flag not them, jeez
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Hayden
This may be taken out of proportion. Sometimes even professional partnerships involve a lot of stress and frustration. Not everyone is compatible with each other and sometimes it is worth breaking apart a relationship. Sometimes the victim isnt really a victim of the person criticizing
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This may be taken out of proportion. Sometimes even professional partnerships involve a lot of stress and frustration. Not everyone is compatible with each other and sometimes it is worth breaking apart a relationship. Sometimes the victim isnt really a victim of the person criticizing
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Huma
I can think of someone who ticks all 5.
He got fired from 3 companies back to back in 2 years, yet the other employees/ company was the problem. Also when his friends left him, it was obviously their own fault. He took zero responsibility for his actions.
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I can think of someone who ticks all 5.
He got fired from 3 companies back to back in 2 years, yet the other employees/ company was the problem. Also when his friends left him, it was obviously their own fault. He took zero responsibility for his actions.
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Mickey
I wasted 45 years of my life with a guy exactly like all of these-
I thought he was just immature and would grow up. In all actuality he's a middle range covert narcissist. GET OUT AS SOON AS YOU SEE ANY OF THESE SIGNS- DON'T HAVE CHILDREN WITH THEM!
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I wasted 45 years of my life with a guy exactly like all of these-
I thought he was just immature and would grow up. In all actuality he's a middle range covert narcissist. GET OUT AS SOON AS YOU SEE ANY OF THESE SIGNS- DON'T HAVE CHILDREN WITH THEM!
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Vera
Thank you so much for making this one. I recently broke up with my girlfriend and I feel so guilty and fake about it. but now that I think about it, I'm glad I got out. she was so manipulative. anyways, thank you guys so much. this really helped me!
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Thank you so much for making this one. I recently broke up with my girlfriend and I feel so guilty and fake about it. but now that I think about it, I'm glad I got out. she was so manipulative. anyways, thank you guys so much. this really helped me!
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Mega
soooooooo Cant I just have a friend, that when would meet my certain needs and Id meet her certain needs, and then we can be introverted and alone with our thoughts untill I have particular needs again? Why CANT i just have that!
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soooooooo Cant I just have a friend, that when would meet my certain needs and Id meet her certain needs, and then we can be introverted and alone with our thoughts untill I have particular needs again? Why CANT i just have that!
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Potates
healthy constructive feedback with love and care is a green flag. partners who can't accept any negativity about themselves are red flags because that means they lack accountability. derogatory belittling criticism is a no-no
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healthy constructive feedback with love and care is a green flag. partners who can't accept any negativity about themselves are red flags because that means they lack accountability. derogatory belittling criticism is a no-no
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1920's
His parents criticize me for being white and educated and mostly because I had money, my ex was from a Island so I don't see Islanders to be racist or not accepting of other cultures just simply sad to have been in this mess.
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His parents criticize me for being white and educated and mostly because I had money, my ex was from a Island so I don't see Islanders to be racist or not accepting of other cultures just simply sad to have been in this mess.
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Alice
6- if they don't have any close friends and all their friendships are superficial.
7- if they have a bad relationship with their family. I don't mean with one or 2 relatives but cutting out their whole family
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6- if they don't have any close friends and all their friendships are superficial.
7- if they have a bad relationship with their family. I don't mean with one or 2 relatives but cutting out their whole family
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Maurice
There are many videos about this topic but what about when there is a child involved? The red flags are there but having a child with that person and loving this person makes it difficult to make a decision
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There are many videos about this topic but what about when there is a child involved? The red flags are there but having a child with that person and loving this person makes it difficult to make a decision
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Shaikh
Why people fall in love? But my main question is how people fall in love? I don't know why human get attracted to each other and how to love someone please tell me how to feel love towards others!
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Why people fall in love? But my main question is how people fall in love? I don't know why human get attracted to each other and how to love someone please tell me how to feel love towards others!
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The
I've heard this voice before but I don't know where? I've heard way too many England accents in Doctor Who and Torchwood to notice any slight difference anymore, so familiar though.
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I've heard this voice before but I don't know where? I've heard way too many England accents in Doctor Who and Torchwood to notice any slight difference anymore, so familiar though.
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Corelich
I see some of the red flags in myself. I'm terrible at communicating and am still terrible at planning which my gf calls childish. But how do I improve in that regard?
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I see some of the red flags in myself. I'm terrible at communicating and am still terrible at planning which my gf calls childish. But how do I improve in that regard?
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Adam
On the not expressing emotions. It can take a few people quite a while to fully open up. Even small shows of emotions can be a huge expression of trust and love.
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On the not expressing emotions. It can take a few people quite a while to fully open up. Even small shows of emotions can be a huge expression of trust and love.
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Melanie
Another red flag is if they are estranged from their family or their own children want nothing to do with them. there is most likely a good reason for this.
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Another red flag is if they are estranged from their family or their own children want nothing to do with them. there is most likely a good reason for this.
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ndrcaвlrrмyѕ
All the guys I dated who called their exes crazy and never took responsibility were the toxic, cheaters, and narcissistic ones, I realized. Ew.
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All the guys I dated who called their exes crazy and never took responsibility were the toxic, cheaters, and narcissistic ones, I realized. Ew.
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