5 Signs You Gave Up On Dating
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Date: 2023-11-18
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Comments and reviews: 20
Zhon
Had 2 fiends (now 1, and I don't talk to him much) my entire life. Somehow at a young age I shut myself away from the world 24/7 at either school or my room. My mom and dad separated at a young age as well, and all I remember between those two is yelling and verbal violence. My brother avoided me and declined letting me hang out with his friends since I had none and this just led me to being on the computer alone at every waking hour outside of school. I also got moved schools a lot and never had the opportunity to make my face a regular at those schools. During that same time when I was young I was also routinely bullied at school from all angles. There was a time where a kid grades above me at a PTA meeting lifted me up against the wall by my neck choking me, and everyone watched except my brother who stopped it. My father yelled at me a lot too because my grades were not doing good and he never tried to see WHY. Anyway, I didn't talk to nobody and I still not talk much and also do not plan to talk much. I've never had the opportunity to experience the emotion of love or even had a conversation aside from very occasional small talks with any woman. I don't feel anything at all, not an emotion to the slightest to others. People routinely tell me they can't read my face or 'emotion's' and my voice is so monotone and flat that they cant tell if I'm talking serious or not. So from that vent I have to say your videos help me paint a picture of what love feels like in my mind I suppose through inversing what you say to apply a general idea of it, so thank you.
Note: After re-reading it sounds like I need to vent to a therapist.
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Had 2 fiends (now 1, and I don't talk to him much) my entire life. Somehow at a young age I shut myself away from the world 24/7 at either school or my room. My mom and dad separated at a young age as well, and all I remember between those two is yelling and verbal violence. My brother avoided me and declined letting me hang out with his friends since I had none and this just led me to being on the computer alone at every waking hour outside of school. I also got moved schools a lot and never had the opportunity to make my face a regular at those schools. During that same time when I was young I was also routinely bullied at school from all angles. There was a time where a kid grades above me at a PTA meeting lifted me up against the wall by my neck choking me, and everyone watched except my brother who stopped it. My father yelled at me a lot too because my grades were not doing good and he never tried to see WHY. Anyway, I didn't talk to nobody and I still not talk much and also do not plan to talk much. I've never had the opportunity to experience the emotion of love or even had a conversation aside from very occasional small talks with any woman. I don't feel anything at all, not an emotion to the slightest to others. People routinely tell me they can't read my face or 'emotion's' and my voice is so monotone and flat that they cant tell if I'm talking serious or not. So from that vent I have to say your videos help me paint a picture of what love feels like in my mind I suppose through inversing what you say to apply a general idea of it, so thank you.
Note: After re-reading it sounds like I need to vent to a therapist.
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education
Same m. o. with women. you either have to be a bad or perfect pretty boy to get their attention. they have been simped over so much even average girls are overly shallow & entitled that they all overlook the very things they describe in their profile. you know about wanting a good guy etc & then turn & give all the attention to the top 10% that ends in just another body count then ironically they crying on social media about being alone. I spent yrs wasting time money etc etc being told don't give up theirs someone for everyone lie. fast forward few decades now I'm in my 50s what looks I had have faded along with my desire. no wife no kids no family of my own. never would have imagined being alone forever for the life of me over some media induced stereotypes but here I'am. I hope more men wake up and at least stop simping and making these girls rich via only fans and the like & learn to ignore them in general the way they ignore us. #mgtow
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Same m. o. with women. you either have to be a bad or perfect pretty boy to get their attention. they have been simped over so much even average girls are overly shallow & entitled that they all overlook the very things they describe in their profile. you know about wanting a good guy etc & then turn & give all the attention to the top 10% that ends in just another body count then ironically they crying on social media about being alone. I spent yrs wasting time money etc etc being told don't give up theirs someone for everyone lie. fast forward few decades now I'm in my 50s what looks I had have faded along with my desire. no wife no kids no family of my own. never would have imagined being alone forever for the life of me over some media induced stereotypes but here I'am. I hope more men wake up and at least stop simping and making these girls rich via only fans and the like & learn to ignore them in general the way they ignore us. #mgtow
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Half
I gave up on dating because it's just so repetitive and disposable. Both genders are happy to throw the other way like used tissue without warning or reason - it used to be just women chucking their man away, but now the men are at it too. And to even get to that point is so fake because you have to dress up nice, go on silly dates etc.
And as a man, unless you're a gregarious, gorgeous 6ft5 beanstalk with the most exciting life ever. no woman will even acknowledge your existence. Average men have no place in this world and nature has decided we cannot multiply or contribute to the future generations.
Online dating is a shallow, looks-based meat market that relies heavily on how terse and witty your bio is. Women just pick their men from a catalogue as if doing mail order furniture. A total unfair waste of time.
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I gave up on dating because it's just so repetitive and disposable. Both genders are happy to throw the other way like used tissue without warning or reason - it used to be just women chucking their man away, but now the men are at it too. And to even get to that point is so fake because you have to dress up nice, go on silly dates etc.
And as a man, unless you're a gregarious, gorgeous 6ft5 beanstalk with the most exciting life ever. no woman will even acknowledge your existence. Average men have no place in this world and nature has decided we cannot multiply or contribute to the future generations.
Online dating is a shallow, looks-based meat market that relies heavily on how terse and witty your bio is. Women just pick their men from a catalogue as if doing mail order furniture. A total unfair waste of time.
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NEMMA
HELP ME PLS! MY GUY FRIEND/CRUSH MAY LIKE ME! BUT IDK.
Ok so my other crush got a gf and I was heartbroken because ppl had told me that he was going to ask me out but anyway I was talking to my guy friend which were gunna call Sam. So I was talking to Sam abt how I felt no guy wants me and he started naming guys at our school that I could date and then he brought up dating him. (Btw Sam has a gf) But anyway he was like would u date me and he looked serious and he was clearly blushing a little bit. And I said the dumb thing of um I mean if u liked me! After that we sat in salience for a bit and then the convo trailed off. I just want to know if this may be a sine he likes me! Because he is always happier and just seems to have more entertaining around me! So once again pls help I neeeed to know if he likes me,
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HELP ME PLS! MY GUY FRIEND/CRUSH MAY LIKE ME! BUT IDK.
Ok so my other crush got a gf and I was heartbroken because ppl had told me that he was going to ask me out but anyway I was talking to my guy friend which were gunna call Sam. So I was talking to Sam abt how I felt no guy wants me and he started naming guys at our school that I could date and then he brought up dating him. (Btw Sam has a gf) But anyway he was like would u date me and he looked serious and he was clearly blushing a little bit. And I said the dumb thing of um I mean if u liked me! After that we sat in salience for a bit and then the convo trailed off. I just want to know if this may be a sine he likes me! Because he is always happier and just seems to have more entertaining around me! So once again pls help I neeeed to know if he likes me,
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Zs fia
I never had a romantical relationship, nor a date in my whole life. I've been bullied by boys because of my looks, my love interest's went for my best friends, or only payed attention until a better option came into the picture. I am nowhere near perfect, nor the beauty standard, and I have a harder personality, so somewhere I deserve it I guess, because it's not hard to find someone better. I kept beliving that a change of environment will bring a change in my love life as well, but it's the same everywhere. I'll turn 25 early next year, and I'm tired of beliving that a life-long experience could be overwriten by faith, or therapy, or anything at all. No matter, what I do, it's not enough. If someone else does less, it is. So, yupp, shame or no shame, I quit hoping.
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I never had a romantical relationship, nor a date in my whole life. I've been bullied by boys because of my looks, my love interest's went for my best friends, or only payed attention until a better option came into the picture. I am nowhere near perfect, nor the beauty standard, and I have a harder personality, so somewhere I deserve it I guess, because it's not hard to find someone better. I kept beliving that a change of environment will bring a change in my love life as well, but it's the same everywhere. I'll turn 25 early next year, and I'm tired of beliving that a life-long experience could be overwriten by faith, or therapy, or anything at all. No matter, what I do, it's not enough. If someone else does less, it is. So, yupp, shame or no shame, I quit hoping.
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Krystallion
Well struggling with a mix of trauma and various health issues I couldn't even start to date to begin with really. Chronic exhaustion, dissociation, mood swings and all, not to forget (probable) autoimmune-issues that caused me to restrict my diet so much that I barely eat anything except the most sparse diet food to prevent physical pain as much as possible. It's a mess. Who would want a patient as partner really. And vice versa burdening someone else with all that is also a mess. There's nothing cool we could do really in the outside world much either because of the constant fatigue. And then there's still the anxiety to even date in the first place, I think a black abyss might swallow me up just thinking about it.
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Well struggling with a mix of trauma and various health issues I couldn't even start to date to begin with really. Chronic exhaustion, dissociation, mood swings and all, not to forget (probable) autoimmune-issues that caused me to restrict my diet so much that I barely eat anything except the most sparse diet food to prevent physical pain as much as possible. It's a mess. Who would want a patient as partner really. And vice versa burdening someone else with all that is also a mess. There's nothing cool we could do really in the outside world much either because of the constant fatigue. And then there's still the anxiety to even date in the first place, I think a black abyss might swallow me up just thinking about it.
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Prvvy
I m on the edge of giving up dating also my last ex left me for someone else and said I did nothing wrong but she lost interest in me and gotten interest in someone else and then now I m dealing with a girl that I know she likes me cause she ask her mom to ask me do I think she pretty a while ago and when I moved out on my own she asked to come over sometime but when we text she barely respond back or don t respond at all and then say she be busy with work and babysitting so im like idc what happens between us 2 like if you like me you would text me like you like me but oh well I m not letting it bother me I m just focusing on bettering myself
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I m on the edge of giving up dating also my last ex left me for someone else and said I did nothing wrong but she lost interest in me and gotten interest in someone else and then now I m dealing with a girl that I know she likes me cause she ask her mom to ask me do I think she pretty a while ago and when I moved out on my own she asked to come over sometime but when we text she barely respond back or don t respond at all and then say she be busy with work and babysitting so im like idc what happens between us 2 like if you like me you would text me like you like me but oh well I m not letting it bother me I m just focusing on bettering myself
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Li
I think the only genuine interest I had in someone was when I was likely a child (13y'o and he was 21y'o so, It would never work, only a childish crush) I think I am afraid of dating, because I am Christian and to me, dating has to keep some boundaries between couples, and I see most of the boys do not want those boundaries ( there are girls too, but focus on the boys. I see them kissing passionately, squeezing their girlfrieds butt and chest, and I find it so gross, I panick when I think some of them could do the same to me I wish I could find a Christian boy too, but even if I did, I am seriously afraid of being touched
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I think the only genuine interest I had in someone was when I was likely a child (13y'o and he was 21y'o so, It would never work, only a childish crush) I think I am afraid of dating, because I am Christian and to me, dating has to keep some boundaries between couples, and I see most of the boys do not want those boundaries ( there are girls too, but focus on the boys. I see them kissing passionately, squeezing their girlfrieds butt and chest, and I find it so gross, I panick when I think some of them could do the same to me I wish I could find a Christian boy too, but even if I did, I am seriously afraid of being touched
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Daniel
I too have surrendered to dating anyone. I tried for a little while, but nothing came out of it. Part of me still wants it, but the other part doesn t and it s the dominant part in this equation.
There s also those signs and the fact that I ve been an only child and almost always alone and I m now so independent and self sufficient that my mother reckons I m an island.
So unless someone does something extraordinary that convinces me that I need them in my life, the singles life is where I m headed.
Sometimes I wonder if I chose this life or if it chose me.
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I too have surrendered to dating anyone. I tried for a little while, but nothing came out of it. Part of me still wants it, but the other part doesn t and it s the dominant part in this equation.
There s also those signs and the fact that I ve been an only child and almost always alone and I m now so independent and self sufficient that my mother reckons I m an island.
So unless someone does something extraordinary that convinces me that I need them in my life, the singles life is where I m headed.
Sometimes I wonder if I chose this life or if it chose me.
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Veil
I ve had about 4 dating apps since the beginning of 2023. Not. One. Like. From any of them. Not a single one. I ve sent plenty, I m a very very decisive and honest liker, but I haven t received a single like, match, comment, text or phone call from anyone. I know I m never going to get anyone to like me in the college I m at, no one here s looking for that kind of thing, they re all just focused on grades and internships. The internet is literally the only place that exists where I could find someone that likes me, let alone would tolerate me; and it hates me.
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I ve had about 4 dating apps since the beginning of 2023. Not. One. Like. From any of them. Not a single one. I ve sent plenty, I m a very very decisive and honest liker, but I haven t received a single like, match, comment, text or phone call from anyone. I know I m never going to get anyone to like me in the college I m at, no one here s looking for that kind of thing, they re all just focused on grades and internships. The internet is literally the only place that exists where I could find someone that likes me, let alone would tolerate me; and it hates me.
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Meat
I definitely don't have the motivation anymore.
As a man, guys are expected to initiate things to start a relationship at least. And it takes effort to mentally condition our mind to push all the right buttons to keep both parties happy.
I like watching relationship advice videos because they can be entertaining.
But gradually over the years, I am convinced that relationship is probably more work than fun and it's scary to be emotionally vulnerable to someone who can choose to break my heart which I would have no control over.
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I definitely don't have the motivation anymore.
As a man, guys are expected to initiate things to start a relationship at least. And it takes effort to mentally condition our mind to push all the right buttons to keep both parties happy.
I like watching relationship advice videos because they can be entertaining.
But gradually over the years, I am convinced that relationship is probably more work than fun and it's scary to be emotionally vulnerable to someone who can choose to break my heart which I would have no control over.
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Unknown
I've never dated anyone nor plan to do so because of past trauma from my parents. I have seen all types of marriage but the end result is the same in all and that is fight. I know fight strengthen the relationship more but I'm someone who avoid fight the most and i don't want to end up like my parents in a loveless marriage. I'm also scared of disappointing my partner because I tend to do everything to avoid establishing a good relationship I push people away when I find myself getting attached to a certain person
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I've never dated anyone nor plan to do so because of past trauma from my parents. I have seen all types of marriage but the end result is the same in all and that is fight. I know fight strengthen the relationship more but I'm someone who avoid fight the most and i don't want to end up like my parents in a loveless marriage. I'm also scared of disappointing my partner because I tend to do everything to avoid establishing a good relationship I push people away when I find myself getting attached to a certain person
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ArchAzrael79
I think I've seen an article that Gen Z and generation below pretty much ditching dating app, which is good.
Personally I also stop using dating app, average men almost always ends up as an option, but I still use dating app to meet new friends/new people, just need to make sure to never catch feeling and have strict boundary for it to be a friendship only.
So far it works out great, and actually I ends up realizing that what I need just an average friendship, and not a high-commitment relationship.
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I think I've seen an article that Gen Z and generation below pretty much ditching dating app, which is good.
Personally I also stop using dating app, average men almost always ends up as an option, but I still use dating app to meet new friends/new people, just need to make sure to never catch feeling and have strict boundary for it to be a friendship only.
So far it works out great, and actually I ends up realizing that what I need just an average friendship, and not a high-commitment relationship.
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B.
+Psych2GoTv As an autist whom the school systems o' the 1970's, '80's and '90's failed due to immature resources, I've an Immature Attachment Style presenting Dismissive Avoidant due to unconscious emotional blocks (pathognomonic o' Kanner's) exacerbated by a general agnosis on relational fundamentals, therefore no dating procedures to eschew. Thanks for the signs anyways:
0: 22 1. A Cut Too Deep
1: 05 2. The Not Me Syndrome
1: 50 3. Inactivity
2: 38 4. Detachment
3: 22 5. The Avoidant Pushaway
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+Psych2GoTv As an autist whom the school systems o' the 1970's, '80's and '90's failed due to immature resources, I've an Immature Attachment Style presenting Dismissive Avoidant due to unconscious emotional blocks (pathognomonic o' Kanner's) exacerbated by a general agnosis on relational fundamentals, therefore no dating procedures to eschew. Thanks for the signs anyways:
0: 22 1. A Cut Too Deep
1: 05 2. The Not Me Syndrome
1: 50 3. Inactivity
2: 38 4. Detachment
3: 22 5. The Avoidant Pushaway
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Alex'sAnimeArt
It honestly just feels like I can't compete with the types of guys that women say that they want. Having to wait so long until you build yourself for a relationship as a man is kind of depressing. Our society always makes us feel inadequate. Always like we are never doing enough. No one can ever be satisfied. I drift in and out of wanting relationships and I am open to one when I see interest shown towards me. It's always just a play or a tease. My luck is kinda trash sometimes
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It honestly just feels like I can't compete with the types of guys that women say that they want. Having to wait so long until you build yourself for a relationship as a man is kind of depressing. Our society always makes us feel inadequate. Always like we are never doing enough. No one can ever be satisfied. I drift in and out of wanting relationships and I am open to one when I see interest shown towards me. It's always just a play or a tease. My luck is kinda trash sometimes
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Buggus
I wholeheartedly think rejection is something you should get a lot of when you re young. It makes adult life have a lot less of a fear component to it. Which carries on to different aspects of life, from interviewing for jobs to the relationships you build. Granted I m not extremely authentic with people and it s easy to do when most people don t care anyway. Which is ok, not a lot of time to care about people you might only know for a quick meal or a night of passion.
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I wholeheartedly think rejection is something you should get a lot of when you re young. It makes adult life have a lot less of a fear component to it. Which carries on to different aspects of life, from interviewing for jobs to the relationships you build. Granted I m not extremely authentic with people and it s easy to do when most people don t care anyway. Which is ok, not a lot of time to care about people you might only know for a quick meal or a night of passion.
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Lori
Let s be honest here: the reasons give in this video are only part of it
The main reasons are we looking for love are; introverted, not attractive enough for modern standards (male and female, too picky, low self esteem, high expectations, lack self confidence or just not fit for online dating due to the other reasons
This goes for both sides male and female
Don t just say one side is harder then the other; cause both sides are difficult in their own ways
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Let s be honest here: the reasons give in this video are only part of it
The main reasons are we looking for love are; introverted, not attractive enough for modern standards (male and female, too picky, low self esteem, high expectations, lack self confidence or just not fit for online dating due to the other reasons
This goes for both sides male and female
Don t just say one side is harder then the other; cause both sides are difficult in their own ways
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Valefar
The Problem with dating apps is that it turns basic human needs like love and appreciation into a mobile game. reducing everyone to a picture, deciding in 2 seconds over another person. I tried it few times but i feel disgusting and am ashamed of myself couse i feel how. distopic this situation is xD Also i talked to few women abt dating apps like, as a guy, you are 1 out of 100 in what feels like a race to get the slightest bit of attention. no thanks, not for me
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The Problem with dating apps is that it turns basic human needs like love and appreciation into a mobile game. reducing everyone to a picture, deciding in 2 seconds over another person. I tried it few times but i feel disgusting and am ashamed of myself couse i feel how. distopic this situation is xD Also i talked to few women abt dating apps like, as a guy, you are 1 out of 100 in what feels like a race to get the slightest bit of attention. no thanks, not for me
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Sunny
To any who have gone exceptionally long periods of time without dating after a divorce or brake up know that it also means you are someone who seeks and gives true love and affection and expects the same from a significant other. Sure, take the time you need to heal, seek help, and move on but don t give up because when you find that special someone who give the same level of true love and affection back to you it will last, and I hope you find that person one day.
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To any who have gone exceptionally long periods of time without dating after a divorce or brake up know that it also means you are someone who seeks and gives true love and affection and expects the same from a significant other. Sure, take the time you need to heal, seek help, and move on but don t give up because when you find that special someone who give the same level of true love and affection back to you it will last, and I hope you find that person one day.
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Sara
After being taken advantage of and being used for his own personal pleasure by my former best friend, I have come to the conclusion (after 4yrs of coping and recovering from that trauma) that I am actually okay with just being with myself. I don t need to be with someone to feel loved. I AM enough. I have always been by myself since birth, born into a family devoid of love, no real friends, always bullied. So, I give myself the real inner love that I deserve.
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After being taken advantage of and being used for his own personal pleasure by my former best friend, I have come to the conclusion (after 4yrs of coping and recovering from that trauma) that I am actually okay with just being with myself. I don t need to be with someone to feel loved. I AM enough. I have always been by myself since birth, born into a family devoid of love, no real friends, always bullied. So, I give myself the real inner love that I deserve.
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