5 Signs You Have a Toxic Family Dynamic (You Can't Escape)
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Date: 2024-02-03
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Comments and reviews: 19
lucifero__
Growing up in a mexican family for me was more like growing up with everyone hating me. My mom and all of her sister were white washed and lost all contact with their culture. This affected growing up as a child for me, typically in mexican culture. Usually the man is the one who leads and supports the woman and does most of the work around the house and everywhere. My mom was very disrespectful to me, no patience at all and when I excelled in school and my teachers would bully me for being too hyper as a kid I started to fail. When in 3rd grade I was threatened by my mom that I'd be put on medication if I did not listen to her. So you can just imagine how scared I was. It got so bad to the point I'd be willing to run away from my mom. I wanted self independency, basically legally for my mom to let go of guardian ship from me. Instead of her doing that, for a couple months She stopped, but then she'd start again. Actually socking my face, my stomach, and anywhere she could hit me just so I would listen to her. I know mexican people tell us their mom is typically like this, but this is not true. I've been to mexico and seen the difference. Mom's atleast have respect over there. My mom went ahead and told all of her sisters that I would misbehave and talk back and they all hated me because of it. But when I was around it was the worst when they'd treat me like garbage and my brother would be treated nicely over good grades. My mom never realized what threatening me and hitting me did to me. It messed me up. I ended growing up alone, apart from my cousins and my brother. Eventually while in high school still always full of energy and hyper. I met this girl who I actually wanted to commit to in a relationship. She ended up pregnant and I was just 16.
My baby mama eventually was kicked out by her family. They are central american so I didn't care anyway. I only wanted my baby mama with me. After officially cutting ties with her family. My baby mama started talking to her family again. Obviously I felt betrayed. I had supported her with what I could, even though I was a minor and she was a year older than me.
Eventually she would start hitting me and telling everyone I abused her or would strangle her. The one person I dearly trusted and loved alot and this is what I got out of it. Still me full of energy and always positive trying to help people out.
I was then charged with Domestic Violence as a minor and had my son taken away from both me and her. When me and her were forced to reside together to prove we can be parents. She started abusing me again. But this time I called the police on her because a social worker and family told me to.
Guess who got arrested. Me. They arrested me for the same charges and I had just turned 18 years old. They didn't even care about justice at this point. Not even a investigation. I don't know what my baby mama told them but they believed her. Imagine that. All that trauma and still having to deal with this. I'm not a hyper or energetic person anymore. I can't join the military so to me my life is screwed. Yeah I'm glad I'm free and out here in the world, but they took the one things I always looked forward to. Now I can't get any of the jobs I wanted. There's alot more but this is a quick run through of my life in a nutshell
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Growing up in a mexican family for me was more like growing up with everyone hating me. My mom and all of her sister were white washed and lost all contact with their culture. This affected growing up as a child for me, typically in mexican culture. Usually the man is the one who leads and supports the woman and does most of the work around the house and everywhere. My mom was very disrespectful to me, no patience at all and when I excelled in school and my teachers would bully me for being too hyper as a kid I started to fail. When in 3rd grade I was threatened by my mom that I'd be put on medication if I did not listen to her. So you can just imagine how scared I was. It got so bad to the point I'd be willing to run away from my mom. I wanted self independency, basically legally for my mom to let go of guardian ship from me. Instead of her doing that, for a couple months She stopped, but then she'd start again. Actually socking my face, my stomach, and anywhere she could hit me just so I would listen to her. I know mexican people tell us their mom is typically like this, but this is not true. I've been to mexico and seen the difference. Mom's atleast have respect over there. My mom went ahead and told all of her sisters that I would misbehave and talk back and they all hated me because of it. But when I was around it was the worst when they'd treat me like garbage and my brother would be treated nicely over good grades. My mom never realized what threatening me and hitting me did to me. It messed me up. I ended growing up alone, apart from my cousins and my brother. Eventually while in high school still always full of energy and hyper. I met this girl who I actually wanted to commit to in a relationship. She ended up pregnant and I was just 16.
My baby mama eventually was kicked out by her family. They are central american so I didn't care anyway. I only wanted my baby mama with me. After officially cutting ties with her family. My baby mama started talking to her family again. Obviously I felt betrayed. I had supported her with what I could, even though I was a minor and she was a year older than me.
Eventually she would start hitting me and telling everyone I abused her or would strangle her. The one person I dearly trusted and loved alot and this is what I got out of it. Still me full of energy and always positive trying to help people out.
I was then charged with Domestic Violence as a minor and had my son taken away from both me and her. When me and her were forced to reside together to prove we can be parents. She started abusing me again. But this time I called the police on her because a social worker and family told me to.
Guess who got arrested. Me. They arrested me for the same charges and I had just turned 18 years old. They didn't even care about justice at this point. Not even a investigation. I don't know what my baby mama told them but they believed her. Imagine that. All that trauma and still having to deal with this. I'm not a hyper or energetic person anymore. I can't join the military so to me my life is screwed. Yeah I'm glad I'm free and out here in the world, but they took the one things I always looked forward to. Now I can't get any of the jobs I wanted. There's alot more but this is a quick run through of my life in a nutshell
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ingrid5944
Yes I can relate, and I just suffered something due to my mom's toxic behaviour towards me, I'm very angry right now. She doesn't stop calling me when I'm out at a party or whatever it is, and I was at a karaoke and I'm a singer, I sang in front of everyone, everyone loves it and they were all cheering for me, I'm sure I was about to make new friends and talk and be appreciated but then I simply left running, like, it was like I just wanted to run away from there as soon as possible because my mom was calling me hurrying me up to go home already, and I'm 28, I'm an adult, and I ran and lost the opportunity of connecting with people that appreciates me! I'm tired of being scared and undeserving because of my family! I just broke up with a boyfriend that didn't allow me to go out and whenever I was out I would send him many pictures so he could see what I was doing, I wanted him to trust me, but nothing worked, I would always be nervous when going out alone or with friends, I would not enjoy going out for the fear of disappointing him and coming back to him and he would have an angry face. I live in fear all the time because of how I was raised, and I hate it! And this relationship broke me even more! Now I need to rebuild myself and regain my confidence in myself. People at the karaoke were clapping for me cause they liked me singing and I didn't even receive that, cause inside I feel like I don't deserve it, so I accepted little from everyone and I don't feel like I deserve praise or too much care and appreciation. Next week I'll come back there and stay till the night and make friends! I bet people would talk to me after me singing, they loved it, and I didn't live that. That's how a toxic family affects you.
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Yes I can relate, and I just suffered something due to my mom's toxic behaviour towards me, I'm very angry right now. She doesn't stop calling me when I'm out at a party or whatever it is, and I was at a karaoke and I'm a singer, I sang in front of everyone, everyone loves it and they were all cheering for me, I'm sure I was about to make new friends and talk and be appreciated but then I simply left running, like, it was like I just wanted to run away from there as soon as possible because my mom was calling me hurrying me up to go home already, and I'm 28, I'm an adult, and I ran and lost the opportunity of connecting with people that appreciates me! I'm tired of being scared and undeserving because of my family! I just broke up with a boyfriend that didn't allow me to go out and whenever I was out I would send him many pictures so he could see what I was doing, I wanted him to trust me, but nothing worked, I would always be nervous when going out alone or with friends, I would not enjoy going out for the fear of disappointing him and coming back to him and he would have an angry face. I live in fear all the time because of how I was raised, and I hate it! And this relationship broke me even more! Now I need to rebuild myself and regain my confidence in myself. People at the karaoke were clapping for me cause they liked me singing and I didn't even receive that, cause inside I feel like I don't deserve it, so I accepted little from everyone and I don't feel like I deserve praise or too much care and appreciation. Next week I'll come back there and stay till the night and make friends! I bet people would talk to me after me singing, they loved it, and I didn't live that. That's how a toxic family affects you.
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Akaria. Luvs1
I don’t have an emotional connection with my Mother. I am definitely the family mediator though. Sadly, my family didn’t stay together. And my Mother’s roommate told me:
In every family there is a mediator. Someone who keeps the family together. You are that mediator. If you want to keep your family together, you’ve got to talk with them. But doing that, isn’t your place right now. One day when you are 18 you can sit down and have a chat with the both of them, but for now, you are still a kid. You should be living your life without having to deal with this stuff. I know you may wonder why life chose you this, but some things happen for a reason. Some families sadly break apart, but if you can just sit down with them and talk out your differences, then you’ve already done the hard part. The easy part is making the memories.
Honestly being around such the inspirational guy, has been amazing. Even though he’s like 4 decades older than me, we have an amazing bond. He gets me, I get him. We are like best friends, it is almost like he is filling in for my dad while he can’t be there for me. and I’m thankful for that. (Even my dad ended up liking him. My mom’s roommate said: he’s just, a man. Which meant he thought he was super cool and they had some good vibes)
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I don’t have an emotional connection with my Mother. I am definitely the family mediator though. Sadly, my family didn’t stay together. And my Mother’s roommate told me:
In every family there is a mediator. Someone who keeps the family together. You are that mediator. If you want to keep your family together, you’ve got to talk with them. But doing that, isn’t your place right now. One day when you are 18 you can sit down and have a chat with the both of them, but for now, you are still a kid. You should be living your life without having to deal with this stuff. I know you may wonder why life chose you this, but some things happen for a reason. Some families sadly break apart, but if you can just sit down with them and talk out your differences, then you’ve already done the hard part. The easy part is making the memories.
Honestly being around such the inspirational guy, has been amazing. Even though he’s like 4 decades older than me, we have an amazing bond. He gets me, I get him. We are like best friends, it is almost like he is filling in for my dad while he can’t be there for me. and I’m thankful for that. (Even my dad ended up liking him. My mom’s roommate said: he’s just, a man. Which meant he thought he was super cool and they had some good vibes)
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queerskiesahead847
I can relate to all of it. I'm 41 and 4 years ago my father got very ill and nearly died. My mother is the actively abusive parent and he was the enabler/fun one/always at work. I temporarily moved back in with my parents to help take care of him at home because we didn't think he had very long. It's been 4 years, he is mostly bed/wheelchair bound still and now my mother has significantly declined as well. My boundaries suck from growing up with practically none. I have an older sister, yet I was the parentified one who always took care of my mentally ill mother. Now I'm kind of trapped here, by my own making I'm aware, and over the 4 years I've developed Fibromyalgia, had Shingles at 39 years old, had to go on stronger migraine meds cause they picked up in frequency, my mental health of course plummeted as well so I had to leave my job. My parents now pay me less than minimum wage to take care of both of them (we do have a part time aide as well. I have an open, friends with benefits relationship of 5 years because neither of us can handle more than that. My past relationships were either abusive or boring because I didnt know how to handle not being abused. I'm 13 years sober from alcohol as well. I'm not looking for advice or sympathy, just illustrating an example of the video
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I can relate to all of it. I'm 41 and 4 years ago my father got very ill and nearly died. My mother is the actively abusive parent and he was the enabler/fun one/always at work. I temporarily moved back in with my parents to help take care of him at home because we didn't think he had very long. It's been 4 years, he is mostly bed/wheelchair bound still and now my mother has significantly declined as well. My boundaries suck from growing up with practically none. I have an older sister, yet I was the parentified one who always took care of my mentally ill mother. Now I'm kind of trapped here, by my own making I'm aware, and over the 4 years I've developed Fibromyalgia, had Shingles at 39 years old, had to go on stronger migraine meds cause they picked up in frequency, my mental health of course plummeted as well so I had to leave my job. My parents now pay me less than minimum wage to take care of both of them (we do have a part time aide as well. I have an open, friends with benefits relationship of 5 years because neither of us can handle more than that. My past relationships were either abusive or boring because I didnt know how to handle not being abused. I'm 13 years sober from alcohol as well. I'm not looking for advice or sympathy, just illustrating an example of the video
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marinocelerin4063
I'm going to be honest, there may be answers to the problem. However, letting go and let bygones be bygones is not the easiest thing in the world. This is not a cartoon or happy ending of a book. Especially when being told to keep all that toxic stuff as a secret from other people so they can't know the family business pretending to be ok even as a child is draining and damage u the same time. Time after time u wanted to say something to your parents that you're not having this, but the moment u say something u lost the battle before it even began. Being told not to talk back, lose your self esteem, can't trust yourself and love ones that suppose to have your back, feeling like you're lost and have no motivation to continue even if u try. Worst of all you're always in the house and seeing the same scene like a movie repeating over and over and somehow it your fault and being blame for it. A constant simulation in your head is playing different scenarios and the anger just boils like a furnace and u can't find a way to release it. Eventually turning into a person with no personality and just people pleasing to feel or get validated from others whom u didn't receive from your love ones. That just me also didn't meant to hurt anyone or remind them of their past
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I'm going to be honest, there may be answers to the problem. However, letting go and let bygones be bygones is not the easiest thing in the world. This is not a cartoon or happy ending of a book. Especially when being told to keep all that toxic stuff as a secret from other people so they can't know the family business pretending to be ok even as a child is draining and damage u the same time. Time after time u wanted to say something to your parents that you're not having this, but the moment u say something u lost the battle before it even began. Being told not to talk back, lose your self esteem, can't trust yourself and love ones that suppose to have your back, feeling like you're lost and have no motivation to continue even if u try. Worst of all you're always in the house and seeing the same scene like a movie repeating over and over and somehow it your fault and being blame for it. A constant simulation in your head is playing different scenarios and the anger just boils like a furnace and u can't find a way to release it. Eventually turning into a person with no personality and just people pleasing to feel or get validated from others whom u didn't receive from your love ones. That just me also didn't meant to hurt anyone or remind them of their past
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idkname420
I get nervous and feel like I need to defend myself and my mother when my father raises his voice. I am approaching my 30s yet I still live with them because I fear that one day my mom will wind up dead because no one was there to help her. I've witnessed years of physical and emotional abuse dealt by my father as early as 5 years old and I saw how much it broke my mom's spirit to the point that she defends his actions and continue to stay with him simply because she doesn't want anger to fester within us siblings. It's like walking on eggshells because just one simple phrase may get him so worked up. I saw the bruises sometimes when I go home from work. I break down in private when I see them.
The worst part is that I exhibit the same behavior. I yell when I get frustrated or had a minor inconvenience. I stayed away from developing any meaningful relationships because I am deathly afraid of doing this to someone else.
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I get nervous and feel like I need to defend myself and my mother when my father raises his voice. I am approaching my 30s yet I still live with them because I fear that one day my mom will wind up dead because no one was there to help her. I've witnessed years of physical and emotional abuse dealt by my father as early as 5 years old and I saw how much it broke my mom's spirit to the point that she defends his actions and continue to stay with him simply because she doesn't want anger to fester within us siblings. It's like walking on eggshells because just one simple phrase may get him so worked up. I saw the bruises sometimes when I go home from work. I break down in private when I see them.
The worst part is that I exhibit the same behavior. I yell when I get frustrated or had a minor inconvenience. I stayed away from developing any meaningful relationships because I am deathly afraid of doing this to someone else.
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TheGuitarFreak22
As an adult I've had to end all contact with the both of my parents. My mom in 2020 and I had to block her from having any contact with me at all. My dad over a year ago since he has never reached out for professional help over his past and being falsely charged and losing his freedom twice.
It is sad that they both see me as the bad guy now. My mom had to be unbearably cruel through being a right fighter and putting me down for having a relationship with my own father. I have been traumatized enough during my childhood and with help by my therapist, caseworker and peer specialist learned that it is best to end contact with them so I don't end up relapsing.
My heart goes out to all those who have had to deal with parents like that. But please do get help if you haven't yet.
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As an adult I've had to end all contact with the both of my parents. My mom in 2020 and I had to block her from having any contact with me at all. My dad over a year ago since he has never reached out for professional help over his past and being falsely charged and losing his freedom twice.
It is sad that they both see me as the bad guy now. My mom had to be unbearably cruel through being a right fighter and putting me down for having a relationship with my own father. I have been traumatized enough during my childhood and with help by my therapist, caseworker and peer specialist learned that it is best to end contact with them so I don't end up relapsing.
My heart goes out to all those who have had to deal with parents like that. But please do get help if you haven't yet.
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hayacpm6408
I had a friend who was an older sibling. They left their toxic household immediately after they turned 18, I was one of their closest friends, so immediately after they left, they came to my house. Then, they broke down about how worthless they were and all the unacceptable things their parents said to them. But the thing she hated most was having to leave her younger sibling, who was helpless in that toxicated family. Trust me, I could understand by how broken they were that it was a toxic household. They and their younger sibling had a 7 year age gap, and I couldn't even imagine staying an such an abusive household, even though I have experiences of my own. They and their sibling had to be seperated and had no connection to eachother ever since. I feel so bad for them and their sibling
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I had a friend who was an older sibling. They left their toxic household immediately after they turned 18, I was one of their closest friends, so immediately after they left, they came to my house. Then, they broke down about how worthless they were and all the unacceptable things their parents said to them. But the thing she hated most was having to leave her younger sibling, who was helpless in that toxicated family. Trust me, I could understand by how broken they were that it was a toxic household. They and their younger sibling had a 7 year age gap, and I couldn't even imagine staying an such an abusive household, even though I have experiences of my own. They and their sibling had to be seperated and had no connection to eachother ever since. I feel so bad for them and their sibling
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MasterCheeks2020
My dad once told me to 'fk off' (rough translation, original word being more offensive) when i was being a brat wanting to do something my way instead of his, and when i challenged him about it right after, he tried to gaslight ME and my mother that he was angry with 'the situation' and not me, i kept challenging, he threatned to hit me but he knew he wouldn't be able to excuse it later so he didn't. And after all that, my mother wants me, although unintentionaly, to feel guilty bc he 'quit his job to be with me and my brother', and that he 'doesn't want to fight his son', like that excuses everything he did wrong, which is a lot, countless times. (honestly i could write an entire essay just talking about my parents)
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My dad once told me to 'fk off' (rough translation, original word being more offensive) when i was being a brat wanting to do something my way instead of his, and when i challenged him about it right after, he tried to gaslight ME and my mother that he was angry with 'the situation' and not me, i kept challenging, he threatned to hit me but he knew he wouldn't be able to excuse it later so he didn't. And after all that, my mother wants me, although unintentionaly, to feel guilty bc he 'quit his job to be with me and my brother', and that he 'doesn't want to fight his son', like that excuses everything he did wrong, which is a lot, countless times. (honestly i could write an entire essay just talking about my parents)
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EvildisGrace143
My life:
My step dad comes home from a long day of working so we aren’t poor anymore, immediately takes out anger on my autistic sister who acts out 24/7, mum is too sick and tired to do most things like laundry. I have to hide in my room for peace, we can never get a break. Mum can’t get a break trying to find a solution to help her with her permanent disease, we moved so I have no one, no friends, all I have left is the internet and online friends and if my mum finds out I’m on social media she’ll take it away, I hate my family. Dad is constantly fighting with mum because mum loved me farther away from him and he wants me to move in with him but it’s just as bad there.
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My life:
My step dad comes home from a long day of working so we aren’t poor anymore, immediately takes out anger on my autistic sister who acts out 24/7, mum is too sick and tired to do most things like laundry. I have to hide in my room for peace, we can never get a break. Mum can’t get a break trying to find a solution to help her with her permanent disease, we moved so I have no one, no friends, all I have left is the internet and online friends and if my mum finds out I’m on social media she’ll take it away, I hate my family. Dad is constantly fighting with mum because mum loved me farther away from him and he wants me to move in with him but it’s just as bad there.
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exclusive3817
I just want to know whether I was the bad kid or they are the bad parents. I always obeyed everything they said. I was a quite kid I didn't had much friends. almost never had any friend in childhood. no one ever played with me. when I asked them y they never played with me they told me because I was too quiet but I was just shy and didn't want to disturb them. i wanted their appreciation, just a little love even 1% of what they show to my little brother or others children. was I that bad. Being quiet is badis this the price for being obedient. there are many things I want answer to but no one to answer. I just want to know what wrong I have done and how can I change it
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I just want to know whether I was the bad kid or they are the bad parents. I always obeyed everything they said. I was a quite kid I didn't had much friends. almost never had any friend in childhood. no one ever played with me. when I asked them y they never played with me they told me because I was too quiet but I was just shy and didn't want to disturb them. i wanted their appreciation, just a little love even 1% of what they show to my little brother or others children. was I that bad. Being quiet is badis this the price for being obedient. there are many things I want answer to but no one to answer. I just want to know what wrong I have done and how can I change it
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jackmullen3713
While I don’t believe I have a toxic family environment I don’t believe I have a good environment. It’s about once every other week I hear a fight and it’s mostly between my brother and mother it used to be worse tho nearly daily I would hear them go at it for what was nearly a year all I could do was run and hide in my bed and act like this wasn’t happening. I know this probably has affected me in some way because the only place I truly feel safe/ comfortable anymore is my bed. I love my family to death but I can’t forget when I would come home from school and hear yelling between the two of them. I guess looking back at it, it explains a lot about myself.
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While I don’t believe I have a toxic family environment I don’t believe I have a good environment. It’s about once every other week I hear a fight and it’s mostly between my brother and mother it used to be worse tho nearly daily I would hear them go at it for what was nearly a year all I could do was run and hide in my bed and act like this wasn’t happening. I know this probably has affected me in some way because the only place I truly feel safe/ comfortable anymore is my bed. I love my family to death but I can’t forget when I would come home from school and hear yelling between the two of them. I guess looking back at it, it explains a lot about myself.
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nickstemberger1289
I came back from college on break when I was 20-21 and it had been a few years since my Dad had passed. My brother and I were in the kitchen and he told me that he had something he wanted to show me. He then yelled to my Mom at the other side of the house that I had broken her vase and me begging him not to say anything more. She came stomping into the kitchen yelling the whole way only for my brother to tell her We don't have any vases here, Mom. Then she turned and quietly walked away back to what she was doing before. I've never felt more seen, yet more hurt. I'm 32 now and struggle with relationships and finding love. But at least I know I was never a bad kid.
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I came back from college on break when I was 20-21 and it had been a few years since my Dad had passed. My brother and I were in the kitchen and he told me that he had something he wanted to show me. He then yelled to my Mom at the other side of the house that I had broken her vase and me begging him not to say anything more. She came stomping into the kitchen yelling the whole way only for my brother to tell her We don't have any vases here, Mom. Then she turned and quietly walked away back to what she was doing before. I've never felt more seen, yet more hurt. I'm 32 now and struggle with relationships and finding love. But at least I know I was never a bad kid.
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S-link999
1. Abuse. Yes, where i previously lived, emotional/verbal abuse is common there, rarely physical, but enough for me to flinch when someone touches me (also including my autism.
2. Role reversal. I do not think so. But does people pleasing count
3. Physical symptoms. Not really. Gives me an extreme amount of anxiety though.
4. Lack of boundaries. Yes, one of my parents is a narcissistic control freak, so he controls EVERYTHING within that house. After i permanently escaped that house, he how has security cameras there.
5. Troubled relationships. Probably, i am not sure.
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1. Abuse. Yes, where i previously lived, emotional/verbal abuse is common there, rarely physical, but enough for me to flinch when someone touches me (also including my autism.
2. Role reversal. I do not think so. But does people pleasing count
3. Physical symptoms. Not really. Gives me an extreme amount of anxiety though.
4. Lack of boundaries. Yes, one of my parents is a narcissistic control freak, so he controls EVERYTHING within that house. After i permanently escaped that house, he how has security cameras there.
5. Troubled relationships. Probably, i am not sure.
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remc0s
- My mom venting her frustrations about my dad onto me.
- My parents blaming things that happened to me onto me (If you had finished your drink, your cousin wouldn't have knocked it over the floor or If you hadn't take your bike to go downtown, it wouldn't have been stolen.
- Constant comparison with other kids that were better than me.
- Never let me do or fix anything, because they rather ask something who knows what he's doing.
- Never want to teach me certain things, and then get getting mad and mocking me for not knowing how to do these things.
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- My mom venting her frustrations about my dad onto me.
- My parents blaming things that happened to me onto me (If you had finished your drink, your cousin wouldn't have knocked it over the floor or If you hadn't take your bike to go downtown, it wouldn't have been stolen.
- Constant comparison with other kids that were better than me.
- Never let me do or fix anything, because they rather ask something who knows what he's doing.
- Never want to teach me certain things, and then get getting mad and mocking me for not knowing how to do these things.
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nightbrite2595
So glad I got out in October. It was years of the same treatment of being the scapegoat with no changes. Had no boundaries and a narc mom, but glad I had such good friends to help me out.
Been 3 months now and I only go back for events, feeling more free and my family still blames me for their issues. Determined to break the toxic cycle! For the ones struggling like I did, you deserve to live your life that makes you happy, not everyone else. It will get better.
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So glad I got out in October. It was years of the same treatment of being the scapegoat with no changes. Had no boundaries and a narc mom, but glad I had such good friends to help me out.
Been 3 months now and I only go back for events, feeling more free and my family still blames me for their issues. Determined to break the toxic cycle! For the ones struggling like I did, you deserve to live your life that makes you happy, not everyone else. It will get better.
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katastrofe6388
I dont hate my parents for being like this I try to understand them they had an extremely hard childhood and they dont know how to manage their emotions and keep control of them and yeah it might sound like I have stockholm syndrome but I dont because Im not going to be like that to my daughter I will always love my family but I love my daughter more and Im willing to change for her and change the world even
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I dont hate my parents for being like this I try to understand them they had an extremely hard childhood and they dont know how to manage their emotions and keep control of them and yeah it might sound like I have stockholm syndrome but I dont because Im not going to be like that to my daughter I will always love my family but I love my daughter more and Im willing to change for her and change the world even
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eljoel89
Dr. Wong: Oh, I think this pickle incident is a better path than any other to the heart of your family's dysfunction. I think it's possible that you and your father have a very specific dynamic. I don't think it's one that rewards emotion or vulnerability. I think it may punish them. I think it's possible that dynamic eroded your marriage, and is infecting your kids with a tendency to misdirect their feelings.
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Dr. Wong: Oh, I think this pickle incident is a better path than any other to the heart of your family's dysfunction. I think it's possible that you and your father have a very specific dynamic. I don't think it's one that rewards emotion or vulnerability. I think it may punish them. I think it's possible that dynamic eroded your marriage, and is infecting your kids with a tendency to misdirect their feelings.
reply
bastionsea2829
My mom was toxic, luckily, my dad wasn't, and helped me realize she was. Both my sister and I tried to escape her, but I can still see the signs of the gender role stuff. I probably overreacted and I will quickly and blatantly refuse to follow or allow someone I care about to apply them. I was even tempted to close the chat when a streamer implied that she'd have to learn to cook to be a mom
reply
My mom was toxic, luckily, my dad wasn't, and helped me realize she was. Both my sister and I tried to escape her, but I can still see the signs of the gender role stuff. I probably overreacted and I will quickly and blatantly refuse to follow or allow someone I care about to apply them. I was even tempted to close the chat when a streamer implied that she'd have to learn to cook to be a mom
reply
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