6 Signs of Narcissistic Abuse
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Date: 2023-08-20
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Comments and reviews: 25
Rimma
I'm really sorry for the ridiculously long post that's incoming, I'm just trying to search for answers where I can.
1. I don't crave attention from people, but I want to know I matter for them and they think of me the same way I think of them? I have the inner dialogues of others rejecting me, but I have them because I see them starting to actively ignore me and pull away
2. I hate lying to the point where I will say what my thoughts are even if people won't like what they hear. I don't know how to sugarcoat things
3. I have loads of anxiety due to the negative self talk, but no one is trying to manipulate me
4. I have been told that I always act as if I'm never wrong and just want to be right, when what I see is I want people to understand what I'm thinking and see my point of view as I see theirs. It usually leads to people being angry at me and me arguing with them because how they say I just want to be right and it just gets worse if I'm dismissed with the yeah yeah, you're right, happy now? I have those nasty voices in my head, but I don't think I twist reality, I do however not always remember the same thing as others.
5. I don't have the need to argue, but it always seems to lead there. When I see people starting to leave me behind I usually start a down spiral where I end up hurting people and get completely shut out of their groups even though what I want seems so simple to me (to see that they're happy to have me as part of the group and want to do stuff with me. In the way I see the statement before the T-shirt is more that I react because I want to matter to them.
I'm honestly confused about my behaviour and am trying to figure out more because I always end up being called toxic by some and a really good friend by others. I'm trying to get therapy to help, but I'm not even sure where to start with all this, as my previous therapist was only focusing on anxiety and didn't really calm any bad thoughts out for long, and having my boyfriend of 5 years breaking up with me recently only makes me feel like I've been a bother for him all this time since I always wanted to do small couples things, and actually tried hard not to let the intrusive thoughts of people not wanting me around cause issues, but yet now, our common friends act as if I've never met them.
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I'm really sorry for the ridiculously long post that's incoming, I'm just trying to search for answers where I can.
1. I don't crave attention from people, but I want to know I matter for them and they think of me the same way I think of them? I have the inner dialogues of others rejecting me, but I have them because I see them starting to actively ignore me and pull away
2. I hate lying to the point where I will say what my thoughts are even if people won't like what they hear. I don't know how to sugarcoat things
3. I have loads of anxiety due to the negative self talk, but no one is trying to manipulate me
4. I have been told that I always act as if I'm never wrong and just want to be right, when what I see is I want people to understand what I'm thinking and see my point of view as I see theirs. It usually leads to people being angry at me and me arguing with them because how they say I just want to be right and it just gets worse if I'm dismissed with the yeah yeah, you're right, happy now? I have those nasty voices in my head, but I don't think I twist reality, I do however not always remember the same thing as others.
5. I don't have the need to argue, but it always seems to lead there. When I see people starting to leave me behind I usually start a down spiral where I end up hurting people and get completely shut out of their groups even though what I want seems so simple to me (to see that they're happy to have me as part of the group and want to do stuff with me. In the way I see the statement before the T-shirt is more that I react because I want to matter to them.
I'm honestly confused about my behaviour and am trying to figure out more because I always end up being called toxic by some and a really good friend by others. I'm trying to get therapy to help, but I'm not even sure where to start with all this, as my previous therapist was only focusing on anxiety and didn't really calm any bad thoughts out for long, and having my boyfriend of 5 years breaking up with me recently only makes me feel like I've been a bother for him all this time since I always wanted to do small couples things, and actually tried hard not to let the intrusive thoughts of people not wanting me around cause issues, but yet now, our common friends act as if I've never met them.
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Coach
Is there a way to live with a narcissistic partner? Are there techniques to have empathy for them on a daily basis? My partner is a narcissist and I'm watching this video because I am very close to getting a divorce.
We've been together for 15yrs (married for 10) and have 3 kids. If it weren't for my kids, I would've left a long time ago. I'm still with her because I want to be with my kids 100% of the time and not 50% if I got the divorce.
We've had 3 different periods of couples therapy and that helps for a few months but afterwards, we fall back into our same patterns. What's worse is that I feel like I'm putting alot of effort into trying to work on the things we agreed upon in therapy but she does not (and I know I'm not making this up because our therapist even validated it.
Every weekend is the same because we no longer have work to keep us separated for at least 8 hours. Intense fighting, belittling, defensiveness, contempt. I keep trying to validate a divorce to myself by telling myself that it would be good for the kids because it's not healthy for them to think this is a healthy relationship but every time I get close to packing my bags, I stop myself from leaving (for mostly fear of what will happen to my relationship with my kids and sadly, laziness of having to upend my life.
Funny enough, after admitting all of that, I think my initial question of how does someone live a narcissist changed to.
How do I muster up the energy and strength to leave? I'm tired, drained, and don't want to spend my entire life doing this.
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Is there a way to live with a narcissistic partner? Are there techniques to have empathy for them on a daily basis? My partner is a narcissist and I'm watching this video because I am very close to getting a divorce.
We've been together for 15yrs (married for 10) and have 3 kids. If it weren't for my kids, I would've left a long time ago. I'm still with her because I want to be with my kids 100% of the time and not 50% if I got the divorce.
We've had 3 different periods of couples therapy and that helps for a few months but afterwards, we fall back into our same patterns. What's worse is that I feel like I'm putting alot of effort into trying to work on the things we agreed upon in therapy but she does not (and I know I'm not making this up because our therapist even validated it.
Every weekend is the same because we no longer have work to keep us separated for at least 8 hours. Intense fighting, belittling, defensiveness, contempt. I keep trying to validate a divorce to myself by telling myself that it would be good for the kids because it's not healthy for them to think this is a healthy relationship but every time I get close to packing my bags, I stop myself from leaving (for mostly fear of what will happen to my relationship with my kids and sadly, laziness of having to upend my life.
Funny enough, after admitting all of that, I think my initial question of how does someone live a narcissist changed to.
How do I muster up the energy and strength to leave? I'm tired, drained, and don't want to spend my entire life doing this.
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Pat
Oh yeah. I dated a narcissist. It started off rather innocently but the signs were there. She would walk through doors in an unusual way like she was on the runway, (not a model) to get noticed and she would get upset when I won board games. 3 1/2 years into the relationship she really started getting negative towards her family and then me. She was pessimistic from the get-go, but now it was in overdrive. Made up weird unsubstantiated excuses as to why she felt the relationship was falling apart. I broke her ribs (actually a bad cough caused a hairline fracture. I was going to abuse her in the future (note nothing like that happened in the past or present at the time, but somehow she could tell the future. I broke her car (actually it was her mechanic who manipulate the carburetor and timing to get her going, it didn't stand up to the winter of 1993. She was very upset that my dad (notice not me) was not overjoyed that she got an entertainment job. The list goes on. I guess she broke up with me because I wouldn't give in to her manipulations to feel bad. I was confused as hell. I hope she found peace. The experience did end up affecting me with some anxiety.
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Oh yeah. I dated a narcissist. It started off rather innocently but the signs were there. She would walk through doors in an unusual way like she was on the runway, (not a model) to get noticed and she would get upset when I won board games. 3 1/2 years into the relationship she really started getting negative towards her family and then me. She was pessimistic from the get-go, but now it was in overdrive. Made up weird unsubstantiated excuses as to why she felt the relationship was falling apart. I broke her ribs (actually a bad cough caused a hairline fracture. I was going to abuse her in the future (note nothing like that happened in the past or present at the time, but somehow she could tell the future. I broke her car (actually it was her mechanic who manipulate the carburetor and timing to get her going, it didn't stand up to the winter of 1993. She was very upset that my dad (notice not me) was not overjoyed that she got an entertainment job. The list goes on. I guess she broke up with me because I wouldn't give in to her manipulations to feel bad. I was confused as hell. I hope she found peace. The experience did end up affecting me with some anxiety.
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Kate
I left the narcissistic abuser. Aka my dad.
I tried getting in contact with my sister and bother. I worked extremely hard. Sent them letters so much too.
They finally came over for Thanksgiving, then there was a massive fight.
I tried stopping them too.
Then, I got them pie and a bunch of food and everything. They didn't act mad at me bit idk.
Then, they ran outside the door, to be picked up by the narcissist with me standing outside holding their plates in my hand. Whilst I stand by the side of the road as they drive off. They literally left me standing in the rain. .. Literally.
That was a little crushing. I'm done talking to them now, I'll only talk to them when they're adults and more mature.
But I'm genuinely proud of myself. Because I'm getting there. And making a life for myself and one day, I'll be someone they can look up to. A healthy person.
I've gotten so much better, because of my grandparents and Mother.
I had no self worth and I'm genuinely starting to build it up again. God I can't believe how incredible it is to have healthy people in my life: )
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I left the narcissistic abuser. Aka my dad.
I tried getting in contact with my sister and bother. I worked extremely hard. Sent them letters so much too.
They finally came over for Thanksgiving, then there was a massive fight.
I tried stopping them too.
Then, I got them pie and a bunch of food and everything. They didn't act mad at me bit idk.
Then, they ran outside the door, to be picked up by the narcissist with me standing outside holding their plates in my hand. Whilst I stand by the side of the road as they drive off. They literally left me standing in the rain. .. Literally.
That was a little crushing. I'm done talking to them now, I'll only talk to them when they're adults and more mature.
But I'm genuinely proud of myself. Because I'm getting there. And making a life for myself and one day, I'll be someone they can look up to. A healthy person.
I've gotten so much better, because of my grandparents and Mother.
I had no self worth and I'm genuinely starting to build it up again. God I can't believe how incredible it is to have healthy people in my life: )
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Karicat
You can present evidence and confirmation of a boundary violation and stay calm while doing so. Making sure they know you know they betrayed a boundary and they will say you did something similar even when it isn't similar. They don't self reflect. They never accept responsibility for their actions. When they're alone too long they will get a new pet or another boyfriend anything just to not see their shadow. They can be surrounded by self imposed chaos and genuinely believe all of their lowlife friends should be serving them even when they're not even doing anything themselves. Then you help them and don't acknowledge your kindnesses and turn the entire thing into an unpleasant experience. When you tell them how they've hurt your feelings they get mad at you for being hurt by them. I'm wide eyed and fully skilled at narc attacks and I should be considered dangerous to a narc.
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You can present evidence and confirmation of a boundary violation and stay calm while doing so. Making sure they know you know they betrayed a boundary and they will say you did something similar even when it isn't similar. They don't self reflect. They never accept responsibility for their actions. When they're alone too long they will get a new pet or another boyfriend anything just to not see their shadow. They can be surrounded by self imposed chaos and genuinely believe all of their lowlife friends should be serving them even when they're not even doing anything themselves. Then you help them and don't acknowledge your kindnesses and turn the entire thing into an unpleasant experience. When you tell them how they've hurt your feelings they get mad at you for being hurt by them. I'm wide eyed and fully skilled at narc attacks and I should be considered dangerous to a narc.
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Andrew
I found this video confusing. You kept saying that narcissists hate themselves but the mythological character Narcissis famously loved himself. It has always been my understanding that narcissists think they are the absolute flawless king shit and that everyone else is inferior or or essentially subjects to give them what they want. Perhaps some of them hold this high opinion of themselves to counteract some deep sense of worthlessness but I also think some people really are just assholes who think the world revolves around them. I think you are wrong to to say they hate themselves. They love themselves so selfishly and despotically that they will lie steal and cheat their way to stay number one.
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I found this video confusing. You kept saying that narcissists hate themselves but the mythological character Narcissis famously loved himself. It has always been my understanding that narcissists think they are the absolute flawless king shit and that everyone else is inferior or or essentially subjects to give them what they want. Perhaps some of them hold this high opinion of themselves to counteract some deep sense of worthlessness but I also think some people really are just assholes who think the world revolves around them. I think you are wrong to to say they hate themselves. They love themselves so selfishly and despotically that they will lie steal and cheat their way to stay number one.
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CONTACT
I was married to a narcissist husband of years with 4 kids narcissistic rob you off your happy quality of life. My own best way to help sanity and out an end to the manipulation is be seeking closure. for example when when my husband started getting frequent calls, I would ask and he would just wave off those calls as not important. At a time I couldnt take more of his lies then I just needed a prove to get custody of my kids and our investments. A friend introduced me to a tech guy and it was so helpful to me. Got all his chats both the deleted ones gain access into his emails chats call logs and I got a lot of proofs that my husband is a cheat and nar All thanks to
. #Best_tech01
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I was married to a narcissist husband of years with 4 kids narcissistic rob you off your happy quality of life. My own best way to help sanity and out an end to the manipulation is be seeking closure. for example when when my husband started getting frequent calls, I would ask and he would just wave off those calls as not important. At a time I couldnt take more of his lies then I just needed a prove to get custody of my kids and our investments. A friend introduced me to a tech guy and it was so helpful to me. Got all his chats both the deleted ones gain access into his emails chats call logs and I got a lot of proofs that my husband is a cheat and nar All thanks to
. #Best_tech01
reply
CONTACT
I was married to a narcissist husband of years with 4 kids narcissistic rob you off your happy quality of life. My own best way to help sanity and out an end to the manipulation is be seeking closure. for example when when my husband started getting frequent calls, I would ask and he would just wave off those calls as not important. At a time I couldnt take more of his lies then I just needed a prove to get custody of my kids and our investments. A friend introduced me to a tech guy and it was so helpful to me. Got all his chats both the deleted ones gain access into his emails chats call logs and I got a lot of proofs that my husband is a cheat and nar All thanks to
. #Best_tech01
reply
I was married to a narcissist husband of years with 4 kids narcissistic rob you off your happy quality of life. My own best way to help sanity and out an end to the manipulation is be seeking closure. for example when when my husband started getting frequent calls, I would ask and he would just wave off those calls as not important. At a time I couldnt take more of his lies then I just needed a prove to get custody of my kids and our investments. A friend introduced me to a tech guy and it was so helpful to me. Got all his chats both the deleted ones gain access into his emails chats call logs and I got a lot of proofs that my husband is a cheat and nar All thanks to
. #Best_tech01
reply
WYDERHACK
leaving with a narcissist who thinks it's normal to cheat and say I'm not suppose to dwell'on it. and Idk how to leave although I truly want to. i got his secrets chat through this professional cyber expert, who help me spy on his mobile phone, he has been having an affairs with his cor_worker in his working place, I notice some changes in him, now I know all the promises of his fidelity are all lie, he broke the promises, now I got lots of things to show that he is a narc, I have enough proof and evidence to file a divorce and custody of my children.
message him if you got issues too.
reply
leaving with a narcissist who thinks it's normal to cheat and say I'm not suppose to dwell'on it. and Idk how to leave although I truly want to. i got his secrets chat through this professional cyber expert, who help me spy on his mobile phone, he has been having an affairs with his cor_worker in his working place, I notice some changes in him, now I know all the promises of his fidelity are all lie, he broke the promises, now I got lots of things to show that he is a narc, I have enough proof and evidence to file a divorce and custody of my children.
message him if you got issues too.
reply
WYDERHACK
leaving with a narcissist who thinks it's normal to cheat and say I'm not suppose to dwell'on it. and Idk how to leave although I truly want to. i got his secrets chat through this professional cyber expert, who help me spy on his mobile phone, he has been having an affairs with his cor_worker in his working place, I notice some changes in him, now I know all the promises of his fidelity are all lie, he broke the promises, now I got lots of things to show that he is a narc, I have enough proof and evidence to file a divorce and custody of my children.
message him if you got issues too.
reply
leaving with a narcissist who thinks it's normal to cheat and say I'm not suppose to dwell'on it. and Idk how to leave although I truly want to. i got his secrets chat through this professional cyber expert, who help me spy on his mobile phone, he has been having an affairs with his cor_worker in his working place, I notice some changes in him, now I know all the promises of his fidelity are all lie, he broke the promises, now I got lots of things to show that he is a narc, I have enough proof and evidence to file a divorce and custody of my children.
message him if you got issues too.
reply
education
Boy have I encountered a narcissist. She satisfies all 9 of the DSM-V criteria for NPD. Best way to deal with her (having spent many years as her supply, remove her from my life. Cut off all communications. She hates it. She is the last to know and demands I tell her my plans and since I did not, then its my fault things are falling apart for her. Classic sick narcissist. Hopeless because the husband is the same and boosts her ego up at the most insane occasions! Youre the richest woman! Youre the smartest woman! Blah blah blahhopeless couple.
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Boy have I encountered a narcissist. She satisfies all 9 of the DSM-V criteria for NPD. Best way to deal with her (having spent many years as her supply, remove her from my life. Cut off all communications. She hates it. She is the last to know and demands I tell her my plans and since I did not, then its my fault things are falling apart for her. Classic sick narcissist. Hopeless because the husband is the same and boosts her ego up at the most insane occasions! Youre the richest woman! Youre the smartest woman! Blah blah blahhopeless couple.
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Davis
My father is a Narcissist. Conditional love isnt fun. I hold things against him that I wouldnt hold against other people because everything he does builds up. Its always the last straw. When someone always acts like they dont care enough about you to be considerate, it destroys your confidence. My dad does whatever he wants regardless of how it will impact those around him and never accepts any consequences.
Ive just had to learn to stand up for myself and recognize the manipulation so it cant hurt me as much.
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My father is a Narcissist. Conditional love isnt fun. I hold things against him that I wouldnt hold against other people because everything he does builds up. Its always the last straw. When someone always acts like they dont care enough about you to be considerate, it destroys your confidence. My dad does whatever he wants regardless of how it will impact those around him and never accepts any consequences.
Ive just had to learn to stand up for myself and recognize the manipulation so it cant hurt me as much.
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Selina
I was around a narcissistic person thought was a friend sadly she wasnt and she began to verbally and emotionally abusing me she knew I suffered from anxiety if I knew she a narcissist I wouldnt have shown my weakness towards her am glad to say she is out of my life however she may come back I still wont give her anymore chances she a toxic person I got no time for people like that she is so screwed up she got nothing better in her life like most narcissists stay clear of these people there not worth it!
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I was around a narcissistic person thought was a friend sadly she wasnt and she began to verbally and emotionally abusing me she knew I suffered from anxiety if I knew she a narcissist I wouldnt have shown my weakness towards her am glad to say she is out of my life however she may come back I still wont give her anymore chances she a toxic person I got no time for people like that she is so screwed up she got nothing better in her life like most narcissists stay clear of these people there not worth it!
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thanks
You were so kind and helpful after explaining my condition to you and you helped me out, I was able to get access to my spouse's phone and I saw what all he has been doing behind my back with other women, I've ended the relationship now it's not easy but thank God for exposing him, massive appreciation to those who recommended you to me, this dude got my job done perfectly.
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You were so kind and helpful after explaining my condition to you and you helped me out, I was able to get access to my spouse's phone and I saw what all he has been doing behind my back with other women, I've ended the relationship now it's not easy but thank God for exposing him, massive appreciation to those who recommended you to me, this dude got my job done perfectly.
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First
The points that you bring out a typical narcissist dont say those things those are too upfront and obvious they do it in a much sneakier way if people said things like that that strongly about upfront you dont last too long with those people they typically do it in a much more discreet way and theyre not as blatant with some of the things they say as you have mentioned
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The points that you bring out a typical narcissist dont say those things those are too upfront and obvious they do it in a much sneakier way if people said things like that that strongly about upfront you dont last too long with those people they typically do it in a much more discreet way and theyre not as blatant with some of the things they say as you have mentioned
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Cindy
I'm pretty sure my husband is a narcissist, thought so for years but he does not have all the signs but does have 2 maybe 3 of the signs and it's been hard to deal with for many years but I'm aware and was wondering is it possible for him to be a narcissist and not have all the signs but definitely has a few?
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I'm pretty sure my husband is a narcissist, thought so for years but he does not have all the signs but does have 2 maybe 3 of the signs and it's been hard to deal with for many years but I'm aware and was wondering is it possible for him to be a narcissist and not have all the signs but definitely has a few?
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Betsy
7they demand victims silence88they ruin reputation of others10they plot demise of those they hate &or no longer have use for11they blame everyone for everything13they steal14they cheat15they get violent16they demand absence of anyone they no longer have use for17they enjoy watchin others suffer to no end.
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7they demand victims silence88they ruin reputation of others10they plot demise of those they hate &or no longer have use for11they blame everyone for everything13they steal14they cheat15they get violent16they demand absence of anyone they no longer have use for17they enjoy watchin others suffer to no end.
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Oliver
My partner always makes me feel like a bad guy when I express anything I feel and refuses to ever be wrong in the slightest and has never apologized for anything in a year long relationship when I feel like I need to apologize every week at least I need to break up but its going to be hard
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My partner always makes me feel like a bad guy when I express anything I feel and refuses to ever be wrong in the slightest and has never apologized for anything in a year long relationship when I feel like I need to apologize every week at least I need to break up but its going to be hard
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Yesenia
I feel like I am in a relationship like this and I don't know how to get out of it? I actually fear for my life and am worried those around me are sick of seeing me cry all the time at the things that are constantly being done to me, and I jist keep taking.
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I feel like I am in a relationship like this and I don't know how to get out of it? I actually fear for my life and am worried those around me are sick of seeing me cry all the time at the things that are constantly being done to me, and I jist keep taking.
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Awesomeking
Before people tear me to pieces. Let me give u how i feel from anarcisst stand point, Shes absolutely correct, our need to get the edge on people first before they do to us is usually resulting from what happened to us as vunerable children.
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Before people tear me to pieces. Let me give u how i feel from anarcisst stand point, Shes absolutely correct, our need to get the edge on people first before they do to us is usually resulting from what happened to us as vunerable children.
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Tsuki
Watching this video I felt my heart hurt because I have a narcissistic father. I am blamed for everything and he wants me to be a puppet or a second version of himself. I don't know what to do about it but I am hoping to get a therapist
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Watching this video I felt my heart hurt because I have a narcissistic father. I am blamed for everything and he wants me to be a puppet or a second version of himself. I don't know what to do about it but I am hoping to get a therapist
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Amanda
Well this sounds like my ex-hubby, my dad & my ex-boyfriend. who both scored 6 out 6 on this list. but I'm no angel. I scored 2 out of 6. But, unlike those listed above. I WANT to improve myself so I can be a better person.
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Well this sounds like my ex-hubby, my dad & my ex-boyfriend. who both scored 6 out 6 on this list. but I'm no angel. I scored 2 out of 6. But, unlike those listed above. I WANT to improve myself so I can be a better person.
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thank
I was emotionally down and i didn't know what to do because i wasn't to sure my husband was a narcissist not until i met a cyberpunk who helped me in getting all data i needed to prove he was a narcissist. Thank you so much
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I was emotionally down and i didn't know what to do because i wasn't to sure my husband was a narcissist not until i met a cyberpunk who helped me in getting all data i needed to prove he was a narcissist. Thank you so much
reply
thank
I was emotionally down and i didn't know what to do because i wasn't to sure my husband was a narcissist not until i met a cyberpunk who helped me in getting all data i needed to prove he was a narcissist. Thank you so much
reply
I was emotionally down and i didn't know what to do because i wasn't to sure my husband was a narcissist not until i met a cyberpunk who helped me in getting all data i needed to prove he was a narcissist. Thank you so much
reply
thank
I was emotionally down and i didn't know what to do because i wasn't to sure my husband was a narcissist not until i met a cyberpunk who helped me in getting all data i needed to prove he was a narcissist. Thank you so much
reply
I was emotionally down and i didn't know what to do because i wasn't to sure my husband was a narcissist not until i met a cyberpunk who helped me in getting all data i needed to prove he was a narcissist. Thank you so much
reply
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