6 Signs Someone Is Hiding Their Depression
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Date: 2023-08-20
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Comments and reviews: 25
Paige
3: 57
My example/experience: So I was being a worry wart and thought that someone had brought a gun because they had an extra bag. I wanted to vent to one of my close friends but I didn't tell them I was sure about it. The person who I was emailing about is going to be called L and his friend is C. So C, leaned over in his chair and looked at my screen, like he does during some tests. I wasn't sure if he was watching me write or not, but I was pretty sure that C wasn't minding his own business. I looked at him and then put my Chromebook on my lap instead. C then proceeded to tell L what I was emailing my friend about. I got annoyed and said, Are you really telling him? (Me: Is an introvert) C just looked at me and sat back down in his chair. L just looked at me and smiled, putting his bag on his desk and making a gun with his fingers. Mocking me. It's just my gym shoes- L said. Me: I'm sorry. I worry a lot and I had a feeling it was just gym stuff. But, it wasn't any of your business to look at my screen. L: Well technically it is my business since you were writing about me. Me: Well C shouldn't have looked at my screen. It was personal. Emailing Nevermind to my friend He continued mocking me and eventually we went to our next class, where L and C were. L is in literally two thirds of my classes. So I walked in, and immediately heard L telling his group about the email. (We were in a construction class and we were in groups to build our own step stools. We all shared one big board that we were going to cut into pieces) I started staring at L to hopefully get his attention and make him back off. But he just bent down a bit and leaned slightly closer to me, and just stared angrily at me. I got nervous, being the introvert I am, and just said, Hi sounding slightly annoyed. L: What do you mean Hi? Me: Ignores (One girl in my group: S) So S was bossing me around. During this, I wanted to kick the chair and my thoughts were flooded with stress. Too many situations were all coming down on me. Then, the board dropped and I flinched to grab it, but it had already dropped. S looked at me annoyed and said, Why did you do that! Me: What? S: Why did you drop the board! Me: I didn't drop it though. My brain is trying not to cry S: Yes you did! I saw you! Me: No I didn't! You dropped it! (S never told me to hold it or pick up the board. I was so distracted by my thoughts I didn't realize they were picking up the board) A (Another person who absolutely hates me): Yeah. WhY dId yOu dO tHaT PaIgE? Me: I didn't drop it. (My voice sounded low and annoyed as I glared at him, my arms crossed over my stomach) A: Geez. I was just saying. Don't need to be all rude about it. 1. He didn't see anything. 2. He was victimizing himself every time I tried to stand up for myself.
So while I picked up the board with the rest of my group, I felt my eyes begin to water. We set the board down and I realized I was going to cry. I walked over to the wall, faced away from everyone and started balling my eyes out. No one paid any attention to me besides one person who asked, You okay Paige? And I didn't respond. I pretty much had a full on mental breakdown after not showing any emotion towards anything for about an hour. Thankfully it was almost the end of class, so I just sat in my seat, staring at the table, with a blank expression. Right back to how my face stayed for pretty much the whole day.
Then after lunch, L asked me why I started crying earlier in a teasing voice, instead of actually helping me or making me feel like he cared for me. Me: Well one reason is that you're telling everyone what I didn't want anyone to know. (The extra bag and the email thing) L: What other reasons? Me: Ignores again because we're in the middle of class L: If you don't tell me, I'll tell everyone what you don't want anyone to know. (He waited to ask me why I cried, until he got in a group with his friends, so they could overwhelm me or so that his friends knew. C was there too) Me: Still ignores My brain: Do it. I dare you. There's already enough people who know about it for it to spread around the whole school. DO IT. I DON'T CARE.
Me in bed that night: Ahhhhhh! He hAtEs mE! He'S gOnNa tElL eVeRyOnE!
The next day: Yesterday does not exist
A few months later: So I heard that you emailed (principal) that L had a gun in his bag or something.
Me: Wha-? I never emailed him? I emailed my friend that I vent to a lot.
The girl who asked me: was it (Literally listing all of my friends until she gets it right)
My brain: My gosh. You all really don't care about my personal boundaries do you?
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3: 57
My example/experience: So I was being a worry wart and thought that someone had brought a gun because they had an extra bag. I wanted to vent to one of my close friends but I didn't tell them I was sure about it. The person who I was emailing about is going to be called L and his friend is C. So C, leaned over in his chair and looked at my screen, like he does during some tests. I wasn't sure if he was watching me write or not, but I was pretty sure that C wasn't minding his own business. I looked at him and then put my Chromebook on my lap instead. C then proceeded to tell L what I was emailing my friend about. I got annoyed and said, Are you really telling him? (Me: Is an introvert) C just looked at me and sat back down in his chair. L just looked at me and smiled, putting his bag on his desk and making a gun with his fingers. Mocking me. It's just my gym shoes- L said. Me: I'm sorry. I worry a lot and I had a feeling it was just gym stuff. But, it wasn't any of your business to look at my screen. L: Well technically it is my business since you were writing about me. Me: Well C shouldn't have looked at my screen. It was personal. Emailing Nevermind to my friend He continued mocking me and eventually we went to our next class, where L and C were. L is in literally two thirds of my classes. So I walked in, and immediately heard L telling his group about the email. (We were in a construction class and we were in groups to build our own step stools. We all shared one big board that we were going to cut into pieces) I started staring at L to hopefully get his attention and make him back off. But he just bent down a bit and leaned slightly closer to me, and just stared angrily at me. I got nervous, being the introvert I am, and just said, Hi sounding slightly annoyed. L: What do you mean Hi? Me: Ignores (One girl in my group: S) So S was bossing me around. During this, I wanted to kick the chair and my thoughts were flooded with stress. Too many situations were all coming down on me. Then, the board dropped and I flinched to grab it, but it had already dropped. S looked at me annoyed and said, Why did you do that! Me: What? S: Why did you drop the board! Me: I didn't drop it though. My brain is trying not to cry S: Yes you did! I saw you! Me: No I didn't! You dropped it! (S never told me to hold it or pick up the board. I was so distracted by my thoughts I didn't realize they were picking up the board) A (Another person who absolutely hates me): Yeah. WhY dId yOu dO tHaT PaIgE? Me: I didn't drop it. (My voice sounded low and annoyed as I glared at him, my arms crossed over my stomach) A: Geez. I was just saying. Don't need to be all rude about it. 1. He didn't see anything. 2. He was victimizing himself every time I tried to stand up for myself.
So while I picked up the board with the rest of my group, I felt my eyes begin to water. We set the board down and I realized I was going to cry. I walked over to the wall, faced away from everyone and started balling my eyes out. No one paid any attention to me besides one person who asked, You okay Paige? And I didn't respond. I pretty much had a full on mental breakdown after not showing any emotion towards anything for about an hour. Thankfully it was almost the end of class, so I just sat in my seat, staring at the table, with a blank expression. Right back to how my face stayed for pretty much the whole day.
Then after lunch, L asked me why I started crying earlier in a teasing voice, instead of actually helping me or making me feel like he cared for me. Me: Well one reason is that you're telling everyone what I didn't want anyone to know. (The extra bag and the email thing) L: What other reasons? Me: Ignores again because we're in the middle of class L: If you don't tell me, I'll tell everyone what you don't want anyone to know. (He waited to ask me why I cried, until he got in a group with his friends, so they could overwhelm me or so that his friends knew. C was there too) Me: Still ignores My brain: Do it. I dare you. There's already enough people who know about it for it to spread around the whole school. DO IT. I DON'T CARE.
Me in bed that night: Ahhhhhh! He hAtEs mE! He'S gOnNa tElL eVeRyOnE!
The next day: Yesterday does not exist
A few months later: So I heard that you emailed (principal) that L had a gun in his bag or something.
Me: Wha-? I never emailed him? I emailed my friend that I vent to a lot.
The girl who asked me: was it (Literally listing all of my friends until she gets it right)
My brain: My gosh. You all really don't care about my personal boundaries do you?
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dead
Its plain and simple. You can never, ever explain how horrifying depression is to someone who has never experienced it. There are no words that could make them see how dark, lonely and exhausting it is. Think of a record playing over and over and over again in your head. But, instead of a catchy tune, all you hear is: youre ugly, you're fat, youre worthless; people dont like you; you make a fool of yourself; you should kill yourself; just walk/drive in front of that 18 wheeler, stop being a coward, people dont want to hear you. Then, add in the chaos of a room full of screaming children. Your head is NEVER noise free. Its a barrage of negativity eating away at your soul. There is no peace. There is no happiness. Depression ruins lives. It ruins relationships. It never lets go of you. You spin wildly out of control, smashing into things on the way to the bottom of that dark abyss. A rag doll tumbling, flailing endlessly with no hope of stopping the momentum. Its a terrible disease. You keep it to yourself because you dont want others to be sucked into your own personal hell.
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Its plain and simple. You can never, ever explain how horrifying depression is to someone who has never experienced it. There are no words that could make them see how dark, lonely and exhausting it is. Think of a record playing over and over and over again in your head. But, instead of a catchy tune, all you hear is: youre ugly, you're fat, youre worthless; people dont like you; you make a fool of yourself; you should kill yourself; just walk/drive in front of that 18 wheeler, stop being a coward, people dont want to hear you. Then, add in the chaos of a room full of screaming children. Your head is NEVER noise free. Its a barrage of negativity eating away at your soul. There is no peace. There is no happiness. Depression ruins lives. It ruins relationships. It never lets go of you. You spin wildly out of control, smashing into things on the way to the bottom of that dark abyss. A rag doll tumbling, flailing endlessly with no hope of stopping the momentum. Its a terrible disease. You keep it to yourself because you dont want others to be sucked into your own personal hell.
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Charlie
Sorry if my english isn't good, i'm french
I just want to say that, i feel like that most of the time, unless for speaking, i talk a lot but rarely to talk about how i feel deep inside of me, and even though i find myself in these videos, i can't believe that. I can really be depressed.
I have many good things in my life, i smile, i joke, i laugh and babbling constantly, but when i'm alone i have all of those pesant thoughts and i don't know how to get rid of them.
But all the good aspects of my life make me think i don't have the right to feel bad, to feel like i may have depression.
And, i see a psychologist and when i see him i'm always cheerful, and i don't know how to telle him i feel so numb and empty in my own body, in me spirit. I wrote a thing the other day, like what I have the feeling that something inside me is dead.
I really don't know what to do, i feel so lost.
Sorry for this long text, i don't mind if you haven't read it, i just feel the need to write something
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Sorry if my english isn't good, i'm french
I just want to say that, i feel like that most of the time, unless for speaking, i talk a lot but rarely to talk about how i feel deep inside of me, and even though i find myself in these videos, i can't believe that. I can really be depressed.
I have many good things in my life, i smile, i joke, i laugh and babbling constantly, but when i'm alone i have all of those pesant thoughts and i don't know how to get rid of them.
But all the good aspects of my life make me think i don't have the right to feel bad, to feel like i may have depression.
And, i see a psychologist and when i see him i'm always cheerful, and i don't know how to telle him i feel so numb and empty in my own body, in me spirit. I wrote a thing the other day, like what I have the feeling that something inside me is dead.
I really don't know what to do, i feel so lost.
Sorry for this long text, i don't mind if you haven't read it, i just feel the need to write something
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Ashley
The issue I have is not knowing what to do when people do reach out to me. A lot of the time theyre the same person that made me want to not talk about my depression, my trust isnt there and I dont know how genuine they are about my emotions so the hardest part is opening up again without feeling scared, then angry/frustrated when I realize how hard it is to engage again. Anxiety also triggers that anger/frustration. Its even much more difficult because Im extremely touch sensitive, and sometimes hugs dont work. I feel confused about how to appear and how to privately deal with my depression, yet it seems impossible to cure behind closed doors because the way I behave affects the people and things in my life. I wonder if I even succeed in curing it privately, will I even be an authentic person to those around me?
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The issue I have is not knowing what to do when people do reach out to me. A lot of the time theyre the same person that made me want to not talk about my depression, my trust isnt there and I dont know how genuine they are about my emotions so the hardest part is opening up again without feeling scared, then angry/frustrated when I realize how hard it is to engage again. Anxiety also triggers that anger/frustration. Its even much more difficult because Im extremely touch sensitive, and sometimes hugs dont work. I feel confused about how to appear and how to privately deal with my depression, yet it seems impossible to cure behind closed doors because the way I behave affects the people and things in my life. I wonder if I even succeed in curing it privately, will I even be an authentic person to those around me?
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SapphireGacha
i have been suffering from depression for almost 3 years now i have always kept it hidden by smiling. I once told my feelings to my friends they called me Mental and left me which just made my depression and trust issues much much worse. i even once told my mom she got mad at me and said i was just being dramatic and trying to get attention. it just broke my heart. I tried listening to songs, draw, or play my favourite games to help me but its just a temporary and my mom doesnt like it when i listen to my favourite songs or play games she says i will just become dumb like that and the reason im depressed is because i like playing games and like listening to kpop. I cant even talk back to her she would just hit me back if i dont listen to her.
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i have been suffering from depression for almost 3 years now i have always kept it hidden by smiling. I once told my feelings to my friends they called me Mental and left me which just made my depression and trust issues much much worse. i even once told my mom she got mad at me and said i was just being dramatic and trying to get attention. it just broke my heart. I tried listening to songs, draw, or play my favourite games to help me but its just a temporary and my mom doesnt like it when i listen to my favourite songs or play games she says i will just become dumb like that and the reason im depressed is because i like playing games and like listening to kpop. I cant even talk back to her she would just hit me back if i dont listen to her.
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Sugaswifeuuu
I dont know what to think anymore. I dont even really know if i am depressed. I mean all day long i am the happy one, playing around and laughing and cracking jokesbit at night i cry myself out or i am just staring at the Wall and listeining to music. I just feel numb and i dont See a point od living anymore. I just want to share my problems with anyone but I am afraid that I am a burden to them or that they won't understand. I once telled my freind about it and she just said that it's just a phase and that I am being over dramatic, I never brought up this topic again after that. I just dont know.
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I dont know what to think anymore. I dont even really know if i am depressed. I mean all day long i am the happy one, playing around and laughing and cracking jokesbit at night i cry myself out or i am just staring at the Wall and listeining to music. I just feel numb and i dont See a point od living anymore. I just want to share my problems with anyone but I am afraid that I am a burden to them or that they won't understand. I once telled my freind about it and she just said that it's just a phase and that I am being over dramatic, I never brought up this topic again after that. I just dont know.
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SLAYZx
I cant reply to your comment saying how is everyone today and im feeling Horrible right now because i lost my kitten and then I lashed out because of a argument with my brother and she can't see me struggling and she sent me to my room but she is being blind and she says she knows me but she can't even see that I am struggling right now and it's really sad that my own mother can't see that I am struggling I haven't been happy for awhile and I'm happy rarely but the last time I was really happy was before I got bullied in 4th grade and I'm in 10th grade I am starting to hate my life right now
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I cant reply to your comment saying how is everyone today and im feeling Horrible right now because i lost my kitten and then I lashed out because of a argument with my brother and she can't see me struggling and she sent me to my room but she is being blind and she says she knows me but she can't even see that I am struggling right now and it's really sad that my own mother can't see that I am struggling I haven't been happy for awhile and I'm happy rarely but the last time I was really happy was before I got bullied in 4th grade and I'm in 10th grade I am starting to hate my life right now
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Rapunzel
I feel so lonely all the time. I have only one friend i talk to and almost everyone I've ever known left me. I consider myself to be a very loving and caring person. if i see someone struggling I make sure they don't suffer alone but it hurts when no one sees how sad I am. I've tried to share my feelings but no one seems to care. it's exhausting to even talk about it now. Please look out for your loved ones. Even the ones who are always cheerful might be struggling deep down.
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I feel so lonely all the time. I have only one friend i talk to and almost everyone I've ever known left me. I consider myself to be a very loving and caring person. if i see someone struggling I make sure they don't suffer alone but it hurts when no one sees how sad I am. I've tried to share my feelings but no one seems to care. it's exhausting to even talk about it now. Please look out for your loved ones. Even the ones who are always cheerful might be struggling deep down.
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Denracer
Sharing does nothing, they just not interact with you more. If you lash out on accident they will start tip toe around you. You don't seek help because you think you are ok, and you'll get over it but you never do. Then you'll just spiral down. A cycle of fake smiles, and fake friendly conversation. Is the best solution to avoid conflict, and show your depress side.
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Sharing does nothing, they just not interact with you more. If you lash out on accident they will start tip toe around you. You don't seek help because you think you are ok, and you'll get over it but you never do. Then you'll just spiral down. A cycle of fake smiles, and fake friendly conversation. Is the best solution to avoid conflict, and show your depress side.
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Brayden
Im hiding mine I just shot my shot after I had a best friend for 3 years and Im not hearing back yet but Im hanging in there. I honestly never thought I had the courage built up in me, but I feel built up with all this anxiety about just a little crush. I just wish I never decided to shoot my shot because now the amount of nerve and anxiety I have is insane.
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Im hiding mine I just shot my shot after I had a best friend for 3 years and Im not hearing back yet but Im hanging in there. I honestly never thought I had the courage built up in me, but I feel built up with all this anxiety about just a little crush. I just wish I never decided to shoot my shot because now the amount of nerve and anxiety I have is insane.
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Zendakon
As someone who has recently begun hiding my depression. That point about thinking What's the point? hits hard. It's very true. I'm constantly worried that if I don't focus on the meaning behind my every word then people are going to take it incorrectly and become angry with me. Or worst, hurt by my words that were never meant to be hurtful.
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As someone who has recently begun hiding my depression. That point about thinking What's the point? hits hard. It's very true. I'm constantly worried that if I don't focus on the meaning behind my every word then people are going to take it incorrectly and become angry with me. Or worst, hurt by my words that were never meant to be hurtful.
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Bean
What does it mean when i cant tell what im feeling? Like i cant tell if im bad or good. i feel kinda sick alot of the time. like my stomach hurts but it doesnt at the same time.
thanks for reading. Remember your loved and there is always someone who is willing to listen.
and i hope you have a wonderful day!
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What does it mean when i cant tell what im feeling? Like i cant tell if im bad or good. i feel kinda sick alot of the time. like my stomach hurts but it doesnt at the same time.
thanks for reading. Remember your loved and there is always someone who is willing to listen.
and i hope you have a wonderful day!
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Oarabile
I can relate to all of these habits of hiding depression. The most painful part about being depressed in my case is not being able to talk to anyone about it because they'll either undermine my pain or the extent of depressive mood I feel throughout the day or totally not understand my feelings.
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I can relate to all of these habits of hiding depression. The most painful part about being depressed in my case is not being able to talk to anyone about it because they'll either undermine my pain or the extent of depressive mood I feel throughout the day or totally not understand my feelings.
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SarahSlan
Im Jesse and when ever I watch a video it upsets me. It may feel like a small thing but for myself it feels like a big thing and when it happens Im always in a small room all alone and thinking about the videos that upset me. I try not to think about it but it keeps getting in my brain.
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Im Jesse and when ever I watch a video it upsets me. It may feel like a small thing but for myself it feels like a big thing and when it happens Im always in a small room all alone and thinking about the videos that upset me. I try not to think about it but it keeps getting in my brain.
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Ad
I wonder if I have just happened to have the worst friends, girl friends, and parents ever, because these videos always strike me as fantasy. You're telling me that people don't mock or scold you for not just getting over it? Where did you find these people?
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I wonder if I have just happened to have the worst friends, girl friends, and parents ever, because these videos always strike me as fantasy. You're telling me that people don't mock or scold you for not just getting over it? Where did you find these people?
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Endless
0: 32 They are pessimistic about the future
1: 04 They have a hard time concentrating
1: 43 Their body undergoes big changes
2: 20 They get unusually quiet
3: 05 They keep conversations surface level
3: 41 They smile to hide their pain
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0: 32 They are pessimistic about the future
1: 04 They have a hard time concentrating
1: 43 Their body undergoes big changes
2: 20 They get unusually quiet
3: 05 They keep conversations surface level
3: 41 They smile to hide their pain
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Ghassen
I'm constantly feeling like that especially not finding purpose in the things people do or I need to do.
but at the same time, I don't want to burden anyone with my feelings. so I just keep smiling or spend the whole day sleeping in my room.
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I'm constantly feeling like that especially not finding purpose in the things people do or I need to do.
but at the same time, I don't want to burden anyone with my feelings. so I just keep smiling or spend the whole day sleeping in my room.
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Henrik
2 of my freinds are doing this and all exept one point applied to them.
My trying to help them never gets accepted and tbh I have depression too and I hide it.
To anyone who is in the same boat as my freinds and me I wish you good luck
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2 of my freinds are doing this and all exept one point applied to them.
My trying to help them never gets accepted and tbh I have depression too and I hide it.
To anyone who is in the same boat as my freinds and me I wish you good luck
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Rachel
hiding your depression just makes you feel more safe than it does to tell others how you feel i have depression and i smile away my depression it seems like im happy but im really not ive had depression for about 1 year now
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hiding your depression just makes you feel more safe than it does to tell others how you feel i have depression and i smile away my depression it seems like im happy but im really not ive had depression for about 1 year now
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Katrina
I have trouble paying attention to conversations, i get quiet more than normal, i don't talk with my friends as much and i have trouble smiling, the only time i smile is when my parents make me laugh. I think im depressed
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I have trouble paying attention to conversations, i get quiet more than normal, i don't talk with my friends as much and i have trouble smiling, the only time i smile is when my parents make me laugh. I think im depressed
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Cheeki
this is even worse when a friend/friends tell you that you can talk to them, only for them to tear you down, laugh at you or even make it multiple times worse because they just want to. Speaking from experience here.
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this is even worse when a friend/friends tell you that you can talk to them, only for them to tear you down, laugh at you or even make it multiple times worse because they just want to. Speaking from experience here.
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Toto
People who don't have depression always tell why we hide our depression
its because we know that you guys will always tell we are lame for having depression. Or always tell there's nothing to be depressed of.
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People who don't have depression always tell why we hide our depression
its because we know that you guys will always tell we are lame for having depression. Or always tell there's nothing to be depressed of.
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education
i wish i could concntrate and actually tell someone about my feelings, i feel i need to be louder sometimes, im usually happy but i HAVE to let it out, sometimes i break down in public. i need help.
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i wish i could concntrate and actually tell someone about my feelings, i feel i need to be louder sometimes, im usually happy but i HAVE to let it out, sometimes i break down in public. i need help.
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levi
i think my older cousin shows alot of signs and he has just entered adulthood i am worried about him hes always locked up doing online work and today he got glasses cuz his eyes were red from overworking
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i think my older cousin shows alot of signs and he has just entered adulthood i am worried about him hes always locked up doing online work and today he got glasses cuz his eyes were red from overworking
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Khnh
I watched this video hoping to be able to figure out how to help my friend, who just went through a very stressful time. But unfortunately, I find myself showing these signs. Haha I didnt expect.
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I watched this video hoping to be able to figure out how to help my friend, who just went through a very stressful time. But unfortunately, I find myself showing these signs. Haha I didnt expect.
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