5 Things You Should NEVER Say to someone with ADHD
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Date: 2023-08-20
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Comments and reviews: 25
John
I hope Psych2Go does one on what you should NEVER say to someone with a learning disability. My boss was upset I had signed up for a one-person shift. I'll admit I'm kind of a slow learner and do much better with a helping hand and guide, but come on, that's no excuse for being insensitive. One of our student leader's responsibilities is organizing who works which shifts on the schedule, and my boss scolded him for not noticing I had signed up for a one-person shift. When she asked him if she thought I could do the shift, I answered for him with a firm yes, because I felt belittled by her. She said she didn't think so, was all I've told you not to sign up for shifts by yourself, I've been very clear about that, I don't know how much clearer I can get for you to listen (something like that, so I'm not perfectly quoting her, and she told me I need someone there to give me instructions and guide me. I regretfully didn't stand up for myself, because I was intimidated. She also once strictly questioned me for putting black linens on the tables for the wedding reception instead of white, the correct/usual color (but in my defense, we usually put on black linens for any event, and I don't even generally set the reception linens. She just doesn't understand how my brain works and the logic within it. That's why I did my people a huge favor when they attended the uni disability-services program my crew and I were serving.
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I hope Psych2Go does one on what you should NEVER say to someone with a learning disability. My boss was upset I had signed up for a one-person shift. I'll admit I'm kind of a slow learner and do much better with a helping hand and guide, but come on, that's no excuse for being insensitive. One of our student leader's responsibilities is organizing who works which shifts on the schedule, and my boss scolded him for not noticing I had signed up for a one-person shift. When she asked him if she thought I could do the shift, I answered for him with a firm yes, because I felt belittled by her. She said she didn't think so, was all I've told you not to sign up for shifts by yourself, I've been very clear about that, I don't know how much clearer I can get for you to listen (something like that, so I'm not perfectly quoting her, and she told me I need someone there to give me instructions and guide me. I regretfully didn't stand up for myself, because I was intimidated. She also once strictly questioned me for putting black linens on the tables for the wedding reception instead of white, the correct/usual color (but in my defense, we usually put on black linens for any event, and I don't even generally set the reception linens. She just doesn't understand how my brain works and the logic within it. That's why I did my people a huge favor when they attended the uni disability-services program my crew and I were serving.
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Allie
It also makes things worse when you say them in a rude tone. People with ADHD can experience something called RSD, which stands for Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria. This isnt exclusive to people with ADHD but it does happen with them a lot. Emotional response can hurt people with ADHD a lot more than it does to people without it. Nobody likes rejection, but for ADHD individuals, its much more severe. Its unbearable, restricting, and highly impairing. Saying things like that which can initiate RSD + adding a negative tone to it makes it a whole lot worse. I have ADHD myself and Ive experienced this on multiple occasions. Its not fun, so if you know anyone with ADHD, be careful with your tone so you dont hurt them like this. - an ADHD person. Im not sure if I got the definitions wrong, but i just wanted to mention a side of ADHD that you dont see a lot.
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It also makes things worse when you say them in a rude tone. People with ADHD can experience something called RSD, which stands for Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria. This isnt exclusive to people with ADHD but it does happen with them a lot. Emotional response can hurt people with ADHD a lot more than it does to people without it. Nobody likes rejection, but for ADHD individuals, its much more severe. Its unbearable, restricting, and highly impairing. Saying things like that which can initiate RSD + adding a negative tone to it makes it a whole lot worse. I have ADHD myself and Ive experienced this on multiple occasions. Its not fun, so if you know anyone with ADHD, be careful with your tone so you dont hurt them like this. - an ADHD person. Im not sure if I got the definitions wrong, but i just wanted to mention a side of ADHD that you dont see a lot.
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psych2go
Can someone help me out? I'm not sure if i have ADHD or if the internet ruined me
I have researched many many symptoms that i very often experience, such as RSD, Some sensory issues, Stimming, inattentiveness, hyperactivity, hyperfocusing on things i enjoy, bad memory, occasional impulsivity?
I'm not sure if I have emotional dysregulation or if it's just the hormones
I strongly relate to many ADHDers experiences
I took multiple online tests (not for self diagnosing, just to see results) and all of them said i might have ADHd
I strongly strongly relate to fictional characters that either canonically have ADHD or are ADHD coded
But I'm not sure if it's either because the internet is ruining my brain or not
I don't want any medications or anything
I just want to know man
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Can someone help me out? I'm not sure if i have ADHD or if the internet ruined me
I have researched many many symptoms that i very often experience, such as RSD, Some sensory issues, Stimming, inattentiveness, hyperactivity, hyperfocusing on things i enjoy, bad memory, occasional impulsivity?
I'm not sure if I have emotional dysregulation or if it's just the hormones
I strongly relate to many ADHDers experiences
I took multiple online tests (not for self diagnosing, just to see results) and all of them said i might have ADHd
I strongly strongly relate to fictional characters that either canonically have ADHD or are ADHD coded
But I'm not sure if it's either because the internet is ruining my brain or not
I don't want any medications or anything
I just want to know man
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Colourful
here's a video idea maybe do something like learning disability that aren't really know or talked about
I think this could benefit some people with learning disability with explaining how it can affect them and can make them feel easier about saying they have it to someone who could tell them that they made it up on the spot or smth because no one talks about it e. g dyspraxia(also known as dcd or developmental coordination disorder) I told some friends I had it and explained bit to them but the thought I meant another learning disorder (I did have proof on my phone and showed one of them who accurately got what I was saying the other one didn't want to see it(also another fact with dyspraxia it is commonly accompanied by another learning disability such as adhd)
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here's a video idea maybe do something like learning disability that aren't really know or talked about
I think this could benefit some people with learning disability with explaining how it can affect them and can make them feel easier about saying they have it to someone who could tell them that they made it up on the spot or smth because no one talks about it e. g dyspraxia(also known as dcd or developmental coordination disorder) I told some friends I had it and explained bit to them but the thought I meant another learning disorder (I did have proof on my phone and showed one of them who accurately got what I was saying the other one didn't want to see it(also another fact with dyspraxia it is commonly accompanied by another learning disability such as adhd)
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Noah
The most painful thing that people have said to me is your a really smart kid but you just arent trying hard enough this has to be one of the worst things (especially for me since Its coming from my mom who has a fricken psychiatric degree and is aware that i have adhd) because the people who say that think they know whats happening but dont actually understand yet they keep insisting that you just arent trying and say its all your fault for messing up instead of showing respect and understanding that your struggling at something that they dont have experience with
I just wanted to say that because its definitely one of the things I hear most yet wasnt stated in the video
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The most painful thing that people have said to me is your a really smart kid but you just arent trying hard enough this has to be one of the worst things (especially for me since Its coming from my mom who has a fricken psychiatric degree and is aware that i have adhd) because the people who say that think they know whats happening but dont actually understand yet they keep insisting that you just arent trying and say its all your fault for messing up instead of showing respect and understanding that your struggling at something that they dont have experience with
I just wanted to say that because its definitely one of the things I hear most yet wasnt stated in the video
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Anonymous
ADHD sufferer here.
I'm only now realizing how tough it can be to just focus. On ANYTHING AT ALL! When I lived with my family, we had a routine. Easy to follow. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner, with leisure in between. It was so much easier.
But now that i'm not with them, it's extremely hard to follow the routine. When you live on your own, everything you do is up to you. Which is mostly a blessing. But for me, it's also a curse.
I'm actually considering setting up alarms to force myself to follow the routine I try to set. My body doesn't seem to want to do anything in moderation unless there's a chance I could die if I don't moderate it.
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ADHD sufferer here.
I'm only now realizing how tough it can be to just focus. On ANYTHING AT ALL! When I lived with my family, we had a routine. Easy to follow. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner, with leisure in between. It was so much easier.
But now that i'm not with them, it's extremely hard to follow the routine. When you live on your own, everything you do is up to you. Which is mostly a blessing. But for me, it's also a curse.
I'm actually considering setting up alarms to force myself to follow the routine I try to set. My body doesn't seem to want to do anything in moderation unless there's a chance I could die if I don't moderate it.
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Lumi
I feel like this is a very eye-opening video. Ive been diagnosed with ADHD when I was little, but my therapist said I only had a minor amount. A lot of things that I deal with links a lot to this video, specifically having parenting issues, broken relationships, and the three things that people experiencing ADHD live with. I usually have inattentiveness to things, though that may be a way I cope with stress, but nobody just fully zones out like a lot of my peers do. I literally hate it when everyone will downplay my ADHD, as its just me being hyperactive. Though something does question me why Im just so unique and can find nobody like me.
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I feel like this is a very eye-opening video. Ive been diagnosed with ADHD when I was little, but my therapist said I only had a minor amount. A lot of things that I deal with links a lot to this video, specifically having parenting issues, broken relationships, and the three things that people experiencing ADHD live with. I usually have inattentiveness to things, though that may be a way I cope with stress, but nobody just fully zones out like a lot of my peers do. I literally hate it when everyone will downplay my ADHD, as its just me being hyperactive. Though something does question me why Im just so unique and can find nobody like me.
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Happying
I'm still young, but I've been having the symptoms for a year now. I'm not diagnosed and i dont think I will because in my family mental health are not talked about. Its so hard for me to open up, because everytime I try to, I feel really guilty and think I'm just seeking attention and I don't really have it even though my symptoms are obviously clear. I tried talking to my sister about it, but all she talked about what that its normal and just burnout. But my sister isn't bad, she really wanted to help but I really can't spit out the words clearly. I don't know what to do anymore: (
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I'm still young, but I've been having the symptoms for a year now. I'm not diagnosed and i dont think I will because in my family mental health are not talked about. Its so hard for me to open up, because everytime I try to, I feel really guilty and think I'm just seeking attention and I don't really have it even though my symptoms are obviously clear. I tried talking to my sister about it, but all she talked about what that its normal and just burnout. But my sister isn't bad, she really wanted to help but I really can't spit out the words clearly. I don't know what to do anymore: (
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Nate
I don't have adhd. But I am hyper, and I don't really fit in because Im super hyper and at 2: 11 I get told to alot but it kinda hurts because everything I do to try and focus it just doesn't work. Some days it comes, and goes. I don't fit in either, as i'm emo but people wonder why I am if im most of the time positive, ON TOP OF THAT I have different interests, such as martial arts, boxing, etc. So yeah, just feels weird that I have to watch stuff like this but I don't have any medical treatments as my adhd tests came back negative all those years ago
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I don't have adhd. But I am hyper, and I don't really fit in because Im super hyper and at 2: 11 I get told to alot but it kinda hurts because everything I do to try and focus it just doesn't work. Some days it comes, and goes. I don't fit in either, as i'm emo but people wonder why I am if im most of the time positive, ON TOP OF THAT I have different interests, such as martial arts, boxing, etc. So yeah, just feels weird that I have to watch stuff like this but I don't have any medical treatments as my adhd tests came back negative all those years ago
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K4T!
Extra thing you should never tell/ask ppl /w adhd (as someone with autism and adhd idk if thsi is from the autism or adhd so eithr way just dont tell someone /w autism and/or adhd this): all adhd(/autism) is the same. . I remember being in Year 5 and my teacher told me this. As soon as my teacher told me that I got emotional and cried. And hear this out! I cried the whole way home & even at night time! I had a dry throats then, my head hurt, i had lack of motivation and i was losing my taste. But I have recovered from that now. Goodluck yall.
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Extra thing you should never tell/ask ppl /w adhd (as someone with autism and adhd idk if thsi is from the autism or adhd so eithr way just dont tell someone /w autism and/or adhd this): all adhd(/autism) is the same. . I remember being in Year 5 and my teacher told me this. As soon as my teacher told me that I got emotional and cried. And hear this out! I cried the whole way home & even at night time! I had a dry throats then, my head hurt, i had lack of motivation and i was losing my taste. But I have recovered from that now. Goodluck yall.
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Alex
I wonder if my psychiatrist diagnosed me properly?
He talked with me and only told me to fill out test with options like are you forgetful, are you clumsy, do you often forget what you wanted when entering room and it was in 2 parts. One for adult life and one for kid times (he suggested coming with parent for kid part of test. I came with my mom cause my father is one of reasons I went to diagnose myself (traumatic past.
I was eventually diagnosed with ADHD, GAD and PTSD so constant war in my head.
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I wonder if my psychiatrist diagnosed me properly?
He talked with me and only told me to fill out test with options like are you forgetful, are you clumsy, do you often forget what you wanted when entering room and it was in 2 parts. One for adult life and one for kid times (he suggested coming with parent for kid part of test. I came with my mom cause my father is one of reasons I went to diagnose myself (traumatic past.
I was eventually diagnosed with ADHD, GAD and PTSD so constant war in my head.
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QueenCatt
I really appreciate that you put this out there. As someone who has been diagnosed with this by a professional, it greatly frustrates me when people tell me I am just making it up. I also want to mention something that I do not think was said in the video. I myself and other people with ADHD do not process emotions or even express them normally. We may take that someone is mad at us because of how we perceive their expression. This is just a personal example of course.
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I really appreciate that you put this out there. As someone who has been diagnosed with this by a professional, it greatly frustrates me when people tell me I am just making it up. I also want to mention something that I do not think was said in the video. I myself and other people with ADHD do not process emotions or even express them normally. We may take that someone is mad at us because of how we perceive their expression. This is just a personal example of course.
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KAESISCOOL
I have ADHD, and my mom has told me number 1 and number 4 before. Like, I say things that are my ADHD and my mom thinks it's not (like procastination and demotivation) and lables it as me being lazy when I k is for a fact it's not. And my mom tries to relate to me saying that she gets it too, but she doesn't have ADHD herself so she doesn't know what goes on in my brain and why I do the things that I do, she says she understands but she does not at all
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I have ADHD, and my mom has told me number 1 and number 4 before. Like, I say things that are my ADHD and my mom thinks it's not (like procastination and demotivation) and lables it as me being lazy when I k is for a fact it's not. And my mom tries to relate to me saying that she gets it too, but she doesn't have ADHD herself so she doesn't know what goes on in my brain and why I do the things that I do, she says she understands but she does not at all
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Tenacious
I'm not diagnosed, but it's obvious I have it (inattentive kind. I could get one, but my anxiety keeps it in check most days, and I've actually adapted already? So changing my way of coping might really throw me for a loop and I already take a lot of meds, I don't want to put more in (bad for your kidneys. I'd consider a diagnosis if I felt I needed help. In America, it'd be a waste of money if I did it just to get it on the record
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I'm not diagnosed, but it's obvious I have it (inattentive kind. I could get one, but my anxiety keeps it in check most days, and I've actually adapted already? So changing my way of coping might really throw me for a loop and I already take a lot of meds, I don't want to put more in (bad for your kidneys. I'd consider a diagnosis if I felt I needed help. In America, it'd be a waste of money if I did it just to get it on the record
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Reecetrex
I have adhd and when ever I overhear someone say they have adhd (the gay anime artists that probably use tiktok) I have to double check if that seems true, because dumb people are causing society to think adhd is fun and quirky because of degenerates on TikTok pretending to have it and saying its cool and such.
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I have adhd and when ever I overhear someone say they have adhd (the gay anime artists that probably use tiktok) I have to double check if that seems true, because dumb people are causing society to think adhd is fun and quirky because of degenerates on TikTok pretending to have it and saying its cool and such.
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joe
just a side note, as someone diagnosed with it by a professional, its very annoying when someone that doesnt have ADHD says they do just whenever they forget something or get distracted.
Also, I like having ADHD, i feel like I can process info more quickly and have more energy when I need to get stuff done
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just a side note, as someone diagnosed with it by a professional, its very annoying when someone that doesnt have ADHD says they do just whenever they forget something or get distracted.
Also, I like having ADHD, i feel like I can process info more quickly and have more energy when I need to get stuff done
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Uma
Dont change yourselves to be like the people of this world, but let God change you inside with a new way of thinking. Then you will be able to understand and accept what God wants for you. You will be able to know what is good and pleasing to him and what is perfect.
Romans 12: 2 ERV
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Dont change yourselves to be like the people of this world, but let God change you inside with a new way of thinking. Then you will be able to understand and accept what God wants for you. You will be able to know what is good and pleasing to him and what is perfect.
Romans 12: 2 ERV
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Bee
I absolutley hate it when I am told to try harder. Because I am trying as hard as I can. But their definition of someone trying their best is different to us. I remember studying so hard for this maths test, and I still failed it. And then I was told to try harder. And it made me livid.
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I absolutley hate it when I am told to try harder. Because I am trying as hard as I can. But their definition of someone trying their best is different to us. I remember studying so hard for this maths test, and I still failed it. And then I was told to try harder. And it made me livid.
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ThatOneKid
As someone who has ADHD, I can say this is very true. For my hommies who have ADHD, I recommend melatonind to go to bed faster and medicine for focusing(idk what the med is cause im ten and don't care to read it) it's helped me at school a lot and has had a big impact on my life
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As someone who has ADHD, I can say this is very true. For my hommies who have ADHD, I recommend melatonind to go to bed faster and medicine for focusing(idk what the med is cause im ten and don't care to read it) it's helped me at school a lot and has had a big impact on my life
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Erick
As someone with ADHD, I hate when people tell me to have self-control. Both of my parents have ADHD, but they still tell me that I'm immature and I need self-control; a lot of the time, they think I'm faking how I act and am using ADHD as an excuse, and it really hurts.
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As someone with ADHD, I hate when people tell me to have self-control. Both of my parents have ADHD, but they still tell me that I'm immature and I need self-control; a lot of the time, they think I'm faking how I act and am using ADHD as an excuse, and it really hurts.
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Griffin
You missed the super common If your struggling with work, just chunk it up! People saying that are trying to help but they don't realize that that doesn't help, trying to chunk things up often makes us feel even more overwhelmed.
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You missed the super common If your struggling with work, just chunk it up! People saying that are trying to help but they don't realize that that doesn't help, trying to chunk things up often makes us feel even more overwhelmed.
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MoChi
I have ADHD since I was a kid and was never taught about it till high school. I always struggled with money and so my aunt who is a bank accountant helps me. If she didnt I wouldnt have my dream vehicle right now.
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I have ADHD since I was a kid and was never taught about it till high school. I always struggled with money and so my aunt who is a bank accountant helps me. If she didnt I wouldnt have my dream vehicle right now.
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Ariel
My bf does these kind of questions to me I really hope I find out what my psychiatrist tells me and confirms to me why I am the way I am and have been all my life. I have my first appointment this Friday.
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My bf does these kind of questions to me I really hope I find out what my psychiatrist tells me and confirms to me why I am the way I am and have been all my life. I have my first appointment this Friday.
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Anne
lol i was actually first diagnosed by a psychiatrist who asked me like 5 questions and then told me i had it lmaoo but eventually i was psychologically evaluated so i could get school accommodations
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lol i was actually first diagnosed by a psychiatrist who asked me like 5 questions and then told me i had it lmaoo but eventually i was psychologically evaluated so i could get school accommodations
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Shosh
My sister has adhd I understand these she was bullied alot I don't understand what bullieing does to people as I've never been bullied or seen people be bullied other than people with adhd
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My sister has adhd I understand these she was bullied alot I don't understand what bullieing does to people as I've never been bullied or seen people be bullied other than people with adhd
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